Random thoughts

[mattwitt]

Why can't a giant asteroid just destroy the earth and all life on it already ?

 

[weedoge]

I'm sorry I bother you with my existence--my continued survival. I know you don't necessarily hate me. How can you hate somebody you barely know? I just know that there is something inherently repulsive about me that infuriates you. I'll be gone soon enough.

Its likely something repulsive in themselves that you make them notice. Rather than just you. Try not to take it so personally I know its hard but we all have demons. <3

Edit: whoops that was a slightly old post

 

[weedoge]

People who sexually abuse others are the worst. Literally the worst. To me sexual abuse is worse than murder.

The fact some people joke about it boggles my mind. How can you be such an insensitive piece of shit? People's lives are completely ruined because of abuse, and you joke about it? You have to be a special kind of asshole to do that.

Also.

FUCK cockroaches. Those things are the proof God doesn't exist. Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck those absurdly filthy, ugly, vile, putrid, smelly and disgusting animals.

P.S.: Pardon the colorful language I have been showing in my posts as of lately.

Its nicer to see someone passionate rather than pandering. And agree it makes me sick seeing people joke about some subjects but free speech right?

 

[throwaway123]

I just had one of the worst days in my life. This is definitely going to be burned into my memory. I also saw my life without the rose-tinted glasses I've been wearing.
Apparently the color of your skin matters more than anything else that you have to offer. It hurts my soul. Sometimes I just want to live alone in Alaska in the middle of nowhere and live out the rest of my days there.Out in nature,undisturbed by humans.

How you look on the outside matters the most but what a lot of people don't know is that the majority of people look ugly on the inside. Nobody cares about your character. It's all about your looks. I've been called so many things I don't want to list them here. I am always the outcast. I don't fit in anywhere. I'm the guy everyone wants dead and now they'll get what they want. All of it hurts so much.

Oh and what a surprise. I am failing my courses again. Last year I barely made it. This year I'm almost certain that I'll fail. The only reason my parents have allowed me to live in their apartment is because I haven't failed yet. I would really like to CTB this weekend but I'm not sure if I'm capable of that. I'm sick and battling my survival instinct in that state....
There is also the fact that If I continue to live I will continue to be humiliated every single day. I'm tormented on my inside. I can stay here in my comfortable room only to face another day tomorrow or I can CTB and be done with it all. I know it should be CTB but it is so hard to get out of your comfort zone. I can always come up with stupid excuses and to be honest I don't know if I'll ever CTB. But what I do know is that I am going to CTB one day. It is a strange position to be in. I know that I can CTB this weekend but I keep coming up with excuses to postpone it and my mind keeps justifying it. How do I break this endless cycle?

 

[Desperate_Soul]

I was just sitting here and thinking about what day I should die that would look nice next to my birth date...

 

[RM5998]

I was just sitting here and thinking about what day I should die that would look nice next to my birth year.

Relate it to Graham's number. You need to do that.

 

[Deleted_9cKnXB34QG]

Sometimes I feel I won't be able to ctb until shit really hits the fan... which might take another 10, 20 or even 30 years.
I'm not strong enough to live and I'm probably not strong enough to die either, why the fuck was I even born >.<

 

[mattwitt]

I was just sitting here and thinking about what day I should die that would look nice next to my birth date...

I used this to find a date https://www.timeanddate.com/date/duration.html

 

[Desperate_Soul]

I used this to find a date https://www.timeanddate.com/date/duration.html

Today seems like a nice date! September 21, 2018. Something about it looks so pretty, I like it. But I'm not ready to die today.

 

[RottingFlowerBrains]

Who likes my new icon just a random question. I couldn't find the thread were we discussed our icons

 

[BlackDragonof1989]

I would like some chicken right now thank you.

 

[Life sucks]

Life is destruction machine as everything killed by time

 

[Lunar]

Who likes my new icon just a random question. I couldn't find the thread were we discussed our icons

Here you go - https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/whats-your-avatar-photo-from.2967/

 

[throwaway123]

If it wasn't for this one person last year I would be dead right now.

aaargh. You can not imagine the hatred that I have. I was so damn close. It would've worked! It would've worked! AAAAAAAAAAAARGH

 

[Desperate_Soul]

I wish I could talk to someone without feeling as if I'm wasting their time or annoying them. This thread helps to let some things out, but mostly I just keep to myself wishing I could let them out. When I keep things in, emotions can't be held in for so long and it wants to be expressed in some way, in any form. My body feels the need to get the urge out by means of self harm and crying, but I'm resisting it which is causing me to feel very anxious right now. I have such a bad headache. I want to sleep, but I don't want to either. I'm so exhausted. Good night.

 

[mattwitt]

We live on one giant floating insane asylum run by the inmates !

 

[Life sucks]

Life sucks
It doesn't matter if I prove it to others or not. I already know it and what other says about it doesn't matter at all.

 

[mattwitt]

If there are 8 billion people on planet earth and the average life span is 70 then that means about 115,000,00 million people die every year, or about 2.2 million people a week, or about 315,000 people a day... So why are they worried about a small handful of individuals wanting to kill themselves ?

 

[throwaway123]

My final day is getting closer and closer and I am becoming more and more excited for it to finally end.

 

[throwaway123]

If there are 8 billion people on planet earth and the average life span is 70 then that means about 115,000,00 million people die every year, or about 2.2 million people a week, or about 315,000 people a day... So why are they worried about a small handful of individuals wanting to kill themselves ?

A million people kill themselves every year but we're just a drop in the ocean. In the end, everyone dies. It's just a question of when.

 

[throwaway123]

I've noticed that nobody, not a single person in real life has a interest in me. Another reason why I am CTB.

God I am so close, I can feel it. I want to CTB even sooner than I planned.

 

[Self destructed]

I'm so close. I just tried partial but backed out. I then went for a walk to try and calm down. I don't want to live anymore. But so hard to end it.

 

[Midnight]

Is it just me or has this forum become very "upbeat" or more "liveley" last one or two months. When i joined it was all darkness but now idk ... Just looking at a subforum like 8/10 threads could just aswell belong on any other forum. Don't want to sound like an asshole ... I just prefer darkness.

Can't really relate/connect to people anymore... The explosion in user count obviously makes this alot more difficult. It's just my nature of preferring small groups of people.

 

[satou]

I feel very little these days. It's like I'm going through the motions of living, but nothing really reaches my heart. I must have closed it off because I was tired of hurting. But you can't shut out emotions selectively, it's an all-or-nothing deal.

 

[RM5998]

Is it just me or has this forum become very "upbeat" or more "liveley" last one or two months. When i joined it was all darkness but now idk ... Just looking at a subforum like 8/10 threads could just aswell belong on any other forum. Don't want to sound like an asshole ... I just prefer darkness.

Can't really relate/connect to people anymore... The explosion in user count obviously makes this alot more difficult. It's just my nature of preferring small groups of people.

I guess it's supposed to be black comedy in some places, and a way to socialize without the awkwardness of trying to hide suicidal tendencies in others.

And the remaining 117% of the time, it's @Caustic Cardinals being @Caustic Cardinals.

 

[Taylored]

I'm not sure how I could fall down even more from being completely filled with sadness to rage when I think about how this all happened to me.

 

[Caustic Cardinals]

I want my last moments to be
On a Cali beach

I guess it's supposed to be black comedy in some places, and a way to socialize without the awkwardness of trying to hide suicidal tendencies in others.

And the remaining 117% of the time, it's @Caustic Cardinals being @Caustic Cardinals.

I approve of this message

 

[Caustic Cardinals]

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/random-thoughts.341/page-18#post-75097

 

[samhelloall9]

Worrying I won't be able to commit suicide the way I want to. It all was so well planned in my head. I don't want to accept having to live but I may have to as I don't want to fail.

 

[mattwitt]

Today I read somewhere that suicide is the ultimate act of selfishness. My first thought was the ultimate act of selfishness is trying to live as long as possible no matter how many people are negatively affected by it or burdened by it.