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LifeIsCrazyNemb

Arcanist
Jan 21, 2024
400
Update:

Removed all labels and sterile caps from the bottles.

View attachment 133856

I got everything ready:
- 16.25g Pentobarbital
- 30mg Metoclopramide
- different sweet drinks and lemons to quickly take away the after taste

I will prolly make another update right after drinking and quickly tell you guys if it really tastes that bad.

Planning to drink in 7-8 hours.
Hey thank you for updating and wish you good luck.
Your information will be extremely helpfull, many members plans to drink the same product soon.
Thanks again and hope you find peace!
 
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Raven2

Raven2

Specialist
Dec 1, 2022
347
Nemehawk I'll be sleeping when you take it, I just want to wish you peace before you go.
 
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Pierrot le Fou

Pierrot le Fou

Member
Mar 23, 2024
23
I support you, just smartly! You're right, it doesn't matter how you do it. A self-proclaimed angel can ruin everything. Anyway, if I remember correctly you have enough stuff, so that's not the problem. In addition, as several people here have pointed out, the more you take, the greater the chance of vomiting. If I were you, I would probably start taking the antiemetic a day earlier and after drinking N, I would down a double shot of whiskey, as alcohol intensifies the effect.
If taken correctly is near to 100%, the problem is the time it takes to die. Some people take less than 1 hour, others 2 hours, 4 hours, 12 hours, there some rare cases where it took 24 hours.
I'm 34, and healthy aside from my dry glands, so I have no idea how much time would take me for me to die. If I was 64, it would be faster.

I thought the same when reading stories of people who didn't have courage to take it. I will try again if I manage to buy more.
I'm 100% sure it would kill me if nobody comes to rescue me. The problem is not the N, the problem is those stupid pro lifers that don't let us die in peace and prefer to ruin our lives even more.
The PPH says you should have at least 12 hours of privacy with any method, even with N. It's not just buy it, take it and die.
You gotta have a plan, otherwise you may end up in a worse situation that you were before drinking the N.

I'm regret that I didn't take it. I will try to buy more, and drink it this time.
If I don't manage to buy more, I will be regret forever probably.

If taken correctly is near to 100%, the problem is the time it takes to die. Some people take less than 1 hour, others 2 hours, 4 hours, 12 hours, there some rare cases where it took 24 hours.
I'm 34, and healthy aside from my dry glands, so I have no idea how much time would take me for me to die. If I was 64, it would be faster.

I thought the same when reading stories of people who didn't have courage to take it. I will try again if I manage to buy more.
I'm 100% sure it would kill me if nobody comes to rescue me. The problem is not the N, the problem is those stupid pro lifers that don't let us die in peace and prefer to ruin our lives even more.
The PPH says you should have at least 12 hours of privacy with any method, even with N. It's not just buy it, take it and die.
You gotta have a plan, otherwise you may end up in a worse situation that you were before drinking the N.

I'm regret that I didn't take it. I will try to buy more, and drink it this time.
If I don't manage to buy more, I will be regret forever probably.
I support you, just do it smartly! You're right, it does matter how you do it. A self-proclaimed angel can ruin everything. Anyway, if I remember correctly you have enough stuff, so that's not the issue. In addition, as several people here have pointed out, the more you take, the greater the chance of vomiting. If I were you, I would probably start taking the anti-emetic a day earlier and after drinking N I would take a double shot of whiskey immediately, as alcohol intensifies the effect.
 
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M

Mugen

Member
Feb 24, 2024
27
I really don't think you should do it in Peru unless you go as far as possible from the source, you might complicate for others who need N desperately to CTB. Not sensible.
Also removing just the labels but leaving the bottles as suspicious evidence won't make much difference.
 
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E

Erick

Student
Jan 18, 2024
172
Have you taste it ?
Yes. I drank a little bit. It tastes like a bad Vodka or bad Whisky, but without the burning sensation.
From what I felt, anybody that is able to drink vodka or whisky can drink N.
 
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Mugen

Member
Feb 24, 2024
27
Also removing just the labels but leaving the bottles as suspicious evidence won't make much difference.
 
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Erick

Student
Jan 18, 2024
172
I support you, just smartly! You're right, it doesn't matter how you do it. A self-proclaimed angel can ruin everything. Anyway, if I remember correctly you have enough stuff, so that's not the problem. In addition, as several people here have pointed out, the more you take, the greater the chance of vomiting. If I were you, I would probably start taking the antiemetic a day earlier and after drinking N, I would down a double shot of whiskey, as alcohol intensifies the effect.



I support you, just do it smartly! You're right, it does matter how you do it. A self-proclaimed angel can ruin everything. Anyway, if I remember correctly you have enough stuff, so that's not the issue. In addition, as several people here have pointed out, the more you take, the greater the chance of vomiting. If I were you, I would probably start taking the anti-emetic a day earlier and after drinking N I would take a double shot of whiskey immediately, as alcohol intensifies the effect.
I know some people who succeed with 30mg of antiemetic 40-60 minutes before drinking it. So I plan to do the same. I did it last night, but when you have that liquid in front of you, you start thinking about your parents and how you may ruin their lives if you kill yourself, that's one of the reasons that kept me from drinking it.
I have only one bottle left now, so I will try to buy some more, not sure if the source will still have it though.
Also removing just the labels but leaving the bottles as suspicious evidence won't make much difference.
yes. That wouldn't make any difference. They will know you drank Pentobarbital anyway.
Update:

Removed all labels and sterile caps from the bottles.

View attachment 133856

I got everything ready:
- 16.25g Pentobarbital
- 30mg Metoclopramide
- different sweet drinks and lemons to quickly take away the after taste

I will prolly make another update right after drinking and quickly tell you guys if it really tastes that bad.

Planning to drink in 7-8 hours.
The book Final Exit says that you should only drink 200ml (13g), with more than that the person is likely to vomit, and with less than that some people don't die. But I saw 2 cases of people who died by drinking 250ml, so I think it depends on the person.
 
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Mugen

Member
Feb 24, 2024
27
There are people (me included) that are planning to go there very soon and failing to get N and CTB can not be an option. Please at least don't do it in the major cities, don't be selfish and be considerate to others who are suffering in this existence and require no additional difficulties getting the N.
 
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E

Ernest1964

Specialist
Jan 6, 2023
363
Update:
Tried again in Cusco, drove around and went to every single vet that shows up when you search for "vet near me" on google maps.
Half of them were closed, every single other store except for one, which required prescription, didn't have it.
Don't go to Cusco.
You went looking for open shops to buy N on GOOD FRIDAY in a very Catholic country?!
 
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nemehawk

nemehawk

for my next trick, i will disappear
Mar 8, 2024
34
You went looking for open shops to buy N on GOOD FRIDAY in a very Catholic country?!
It was my last day there and i didn't have anything else to do soooo... yeah that's what i did lol.

As i said about half the shops were open, i was just trying to get more info for other people that are looking to buy in cusco, i already had my N.

Also i did check all shops in the known street 2 days before.
I really don't think you should do it in Peru unless you go as far as possible from the source, you might complicate for others who need N desperately to CTB. Not sensible.
Also removing just the labels but leaving the bottles as suspicious evidence won't make much difference.
Also removing just the labels but leaving the bottles as suspicious evidence won't make much difference.
There are people (me included) that are planning to go there very soon and failing to get N and CTB can not be an option. Please at least don't do it in the major cities, don't be selfish and be considerate to others who are suffering in this existence and require no additional difficulties getting the N.
yes. That wouldn't make any difference. They will know you drank Pentobarbital anyway
Yeah, i know that they will find out what i drank but they won't know it instantly, i can't find the post but somebody also told me to remove the labels and packaging so they won't know what caused my death immediately and the media doesn't pick it up.

At first it was my plan to take the N to my homecountry but i can't wait that long and i also don't want to risk it.
 
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E

Erick

Student
Jan 18, 2024
172
You went looking for open shops to buy N on GOOD FRIDAY in a very Catholic country?!
In his defense, there were two people here who tried two weeks ago, and couldn't find any store selling it.
 
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Mugen

Member
Feb 24, 2024
27
Please don't do it in the big city, it seems that you don't care about the possible aftermath for others. You said you don't really have mental problems or serious issues that is pushing you to CTB, some other people have been enduring much suffering in this life for many years and CTB is the only way for us to finally find peace, not to mention the financial struggle it can be for some to go and find the N. Just give it a thought. Worst case you could catch a bus to a remote destination (to avoid airport), at least it would minimise the impact.
 
E

Erick

Student
Jan 18, 2024
172
Please don't do it in the big city, it seems that you don't care about the possible aftermath for others. You said you don't really have mental problems or serious issues that is pushing you to CTB, some other people have been enduring much suffering in this life for many years and CTB is the only way for us to finally find peace, not to mention the financial struggle it can be for some to go and find the N. Just give it a thought. Worst case you could catch a bus to a remote destination (to avoid airport), at least it would minimise the impact.
I don't understand why people with no health issues nor financial issues go through all the stress of CTB.
The guy is healthy and have money to spend days in a 5 star hotel, but still prefer all the stress of killing himself.
If I was healthy and with money to spend, I would never consider CTB, let alone in another country.
 
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nemehawk

nemehawk

for my next trick, i will disappear
Mar 8, 2024
34
Please don't do it in the big city, it seems that you don't care about the possible aftermath for others. You said you don't really have mental problems or serious issues that is pushing you to CTB, some other people have been enduring much suffering in this life for many years and CTB is the only way for us to finally find peace, not to mention the financial struggle it can be for some to go and find the N. Just give it a thought. Worst case you could catch a bus to a remote destination (to avoid airport), at least it would minimise the impact.
I don't understand why people with no health issues nor financial issues go through all the stress of CTB.
The guy is healthy and have money to spend days in a 5 star hotel, but still prefer all the stress of killing himself.
If I was healthy and with money to spend, I would never consider CTB, let alone in another country.
I am not selfish, i do care about others.
That's why i update this thread so much, i want to give others information about the current buying situation in Lima and Cusco, i am sorry but i have no other option that ctbing here and now.

I wanna mention that i'm not rich, i saved some money from back when i was making a lot of money but that was in the past, i couldn't afford staying in this suite for more than a few days.

Also money and physical health doesn't automatically mean that a life is worth living, besides that you don't need to understand why i'm ctbing.

But i understand that there are others who are in way worse situations.

I know that it isn't the best option to ctb here but i'm not the first one to do this and even the ppeh mentions it as an option, i planned to take the N home with to keep sources alive for longer but that isn't possible for me anymore, you gotta accept that.

I removed all labels and packing so they won't find out where exactly i purchased the N, they will find out after doing an autopsy and this will be days or weeks after they find me so it won't be picked up by the media and only be a sidenote.

Btw, this is the post i meant, i think the same:

I would like to ask people who prefer to do it in the country where they buy the product to cover their tracks at least by removing and/or destroying the bottle label and the outer package.

In this way, you hide what substance you used, protect the seller and maintain the source's availability.
Sure, some weeks later, and after some tests, they will find out the substance used. But by then, nobody will care about the case, especially the authorities or the media. It will just be a footnote.
 
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nemehawk

nemehawk

for my next trick, i will disappear
Mar 8, 2024
34
I decided not to update this thread anymore, thanks for all the kind words, advice and everything!

I will drink the N in about 10 minutes.

If you're not hearing from me in this thread within the next month you can be sure that my attempt was successful.

See y'all!
 
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davidtorez

davidtorez

Mage
Mar 8, 2024
510
Hope you find the peace you're looking for! You deserve it after all the effort you put into it
 
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CursedReality88

CursedReality88

Member
May 23, 2023
78
I don't understand why people with no health issues nor financial issues go through all the stress of CTB.
The guy is healthy and have money to spend days in a 5 star hotel, but still prefer all the stress of killing himself.
If I was healthy and with money to spend, I would never consider CTB, let alone in another country.
Everyone has their own reasons. Money and health doesn't always provide happiness. Kinda rude for you and the other guy judging him for his own reasons. He made this thread to help others find N, he listened to the other guys advice to remove labels. Taking it out if the country is a huge risk. He did his work. If he doesn't want to participate in life anymore, that's his call. He was trying to help people and you probably made his last moments worse with all the whining. If you are still here, thank you for your service! Rest in peace.
 
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Myforevercharlie

Myforevercharlie

Global Mod
Feb 13, 2020
3,053
I don't understand why people with no health issues nor financial issues go through all the stress of CTB.
The guy is healthy and have money to spend days in a 5 star hotel, but still prefer all the stress of killing himself.
If I was healthy and with money to spend, I would never consider CTB, let alone in another country.
What you would do is not relevant.
 
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Myforevercharlie

Myforevercharlie

Global Mod
Feb 13, 2020
3,053
Please don't do it in the big city, it seems that you don't care about the possible aftermath for others. You said you don't really have mental problems or serious issues that is pushing you to CTB, some other people have been enduring much suffering in this life for many years and CTB is the only way for us to finally find peace, not to mention the financial struggle it can be for some to go and find the N. Just give it a thought. Worst case you could catch a bus to a remote destination (to avoid airport), at least it would minimise the impact.
None of your business, OP clearly has their reasons.
 
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E

Erick

Student
Jan 18, 2024
172
What you would do is not relevant.
I wasn't trying to be rude. I just wanted to understand why taking so much risk to kill yourself when you are healthy and not poor.
Is it really worthy to risk permanent brain damage if you are healthy and not poor?
Everyone has their own reasons. Money and health doesn't always provide happiness. Kinda rude for you and the other guy judging him for his own reasons. He made this thread to help others find N, he listened to the other guys advice to remove labels. Taking it out if the country is a huge risk. He did his work. If he doesn't want to participate in life anymore, that's his call. He was trying to help people and you probably made his last moments worse with all the whining. If you are still here, thank you for your service! Rest in peace.
As I said before, I wasn't trying to be rude, just wanted to understand why taking the risk of getting permanent brain damage or any other damage to your health, when you are healthy and not poor?
Why go to all the stress of CTB and leave your family and friends, when your problems can be solved?
 
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JezebelDuLioncourt

JezebelDuLioncourt

Member
Feb 23, 2024
81
I decided not to update this thread anymore, thanks for all the kind words, advice and everything!

I will drink the N in about 10 minutes.

If you're not hearing from me in this thread within the next month you can be sure that my attempt was successful.

See y'all!
I wish you safe journey, mate. Your story and all the info you provided on this post have helped a lot of us one way or another. The popularity of this thread is a testament to that.

Pay no attention to the couple of sourpusses who forced their two cents in and tried to ruin your farewell party. As I've mentioned earlier, your determination is enviable. And so it's no surprise that Debbie Downer and Negative Nancy would show up to give vent to their poorly-masked enviousness.

All the best, mate!
Please don't do it in the big city, it seems that you don't care about the possible aftermath for others. You said you don't really have mental problems or serious issues that is pushing you to CTB, some other people have been enduring much suffering in this life for many years and CTB is the only way for us to finally find peace, not to mention the financial struggle it can be for some to go and find the N. Just give it a thought. Worst case you could catch a bus to a remote destination (to avoid airport), at least it would minimise the impact.
Who do you think you are? Some high priestess of the suicide superhighway empowered to direct where one can and cannot catch the bus? Get over yourself.

Do what you need to do to catch your own damn bus without derailing other people's journey.
I wasn't trying to be rude. I just wanted to understand why taking so much risk to kill yourself when you are healthy and not poor.
Is it really worthy to risk permanent brain damage if you are healthy and not poor?

As I said before, I wasn't trying to be rude, just wanted to understand why taking the risk of getting permanent brain damage or any other damage to your health, when you are healthy and not poor?
Why go to all the stress of CTB and leave your family and friends, when your problems can be solved?
And who appointed you to be the Ultimate Arbiter of the Right and Wrong Reasons to Commit Suicide? If one wants to harakiri because he's too damn handsome and rich and smart, then that's nunya. Do yourself a favor and take a long walk off a short pier already.
 
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davidtorez

davidtorez

Mage
Mar 8, 2024
510
I wish you safe journey, mate. Your story and all the info you provided on this post have helped a lot of us one way or another. The popularity of this thread is a testament to that.

Pay no attention to the couple of sourpusses who forced their two cents in and tried to ruin your farewell party. As I've mentioned earlier, your determination is enviable. And so it's no surprise that Debbie Downer and Negative Nancy would show up to give vent to their poorly-masked enviousness.

All the best, mate!

Who do you think you are? Some high priestess of the suicide superhighway empowered to direct where one can and cannot catch the bus? Get over yourself.

Do what you need to do to catch your own damn bus without derailing other people's journey.

And who appointed you to be the Ultimate Arbiter of the Right and Wrong Reasons to Commit Suicide? If one wants to harakiri because he's too damn handsome and rich and smart, then that's nunya. Do yourself a favor and take a long walk off a short pier already.
😂😂😂
 
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Mugen

Member
Feb 24, 2024
27
None of your business, OP clearly has their reasons.
All I was saying to the dude was not to do it at the source, I think it isn't sensible as it can affect others, it has been said million times... I am thinking too about those behind who need it desperately (me included), and I was just quoting his own motives. The nature of his intentions is not so relevant but I care if potentially it can complicate things for others. Go an reread things if you wish.
And as a last note, although the post was helpful updating the situation, choosing to do it at source defeat it's purpose. I am sorry if you don't like what you are hearing but it is the truth. Anyway it's all probably done by now, I hope it works out for him and for all of us.
 
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cheese.out

cheese.out

Why am I still here
Jul 25, 2023
204
I decided not to update this thread anymore, thanks for all the kind words, advice and everything!

I will drink the N in about 10 minutes.

If you're not hearing from me in this thread within the next month you can be sure that my attempt was successful.

See y'all!
Much love and safe travels❤️
 
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Mugen

Member
Feb 24, 2024
27
Who do you think you are? Some high priestess of the suicide superhighway empowered to direct where one can and cannot catch the bus? Get over yourself.

Do what you need to do to catch your own damn bus without derailing other people's journey.
Hypocrite.
 
I

iloverachel

Enlightened
Mar 7, 2024
1,199
Farewell my friend
 
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SolitudeMan

SolitudeMan

Member
Mar 1, 2024
21
I decided not to update this thread anymore, thanks for all the kind words, advice and everything!

I will drink the N in about 10 minutes.

If you're not hearing from me in this thread within the next month you can be sure that my attempt was successful.

See y'all!
See you in another life friend.
 
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wereintheendgamenow

wereintheendgamenow

Member
Mar 21, 2024
6
Thinking a bit more about this (and crossing my fingers for *everyone* 🤞🏼):

1. brown bottles, even without labels and boxes, will be a dead giveaway straight up, no-one will need weeks or an autopsy to *think* 'Halatal'. Emergency services and crime scene investigators deal with suicides (even though any CSIs would then find there was no crime committed), they know the methods, and they know pentobarbital is one that comes in a brown bottle in Peru. It will take minutes, if not seconds, of someone competent observing the scene to reach *a strong suspicion* of the right conclusion. Does word then immediately go out to vendors of Halatal? 🧐🤔

2. a suite in a 5-star hotel is the kind of location to be of interest to media. Whether a story might be broken by the authorities as part of a kind of a public service announcement, with the location as a hook upon which to hang the story, or might leak from the hotel is another matter. One would think the hotel and staff would have their lips firmly sealed. Might the name/reputation of the hotel steer the police towards keeping things quiet(er)? 🧐🤔 That could depend on quite how fancy the hotel is, whether it's part of an international chain etc.

3. hotels know their guests' comings and goings, not least high-end hotels and their high-rollers. Between cameras in communal areas, electronic locks and room key cards being able to record entry and exit times, motion sensors in some rooms etc. And then there's just the good, old-fashioned matter of staff physically observing guests come and go. Not seeing someone emerge *combined with* no room service or food deliveries... 🧐🤔 A 'Do Not Disturb' sign may not override a well-intentioned check to see if all is okay. Nemehawk said more than 48 hours after consumption, so that sounds like they booked the suite until Wednesday.

4. the greater the distance and disconnect between source and execution (!), obviously the better

===========

Because of 2. and 3., if to be done in paid-for accommodation, Airbnb or any apartment booking for an extra 2 nights after ctb date for the win? 🧐🤔

[Lots of 'monocle' and 'thinking' emojis, I know.]

===========

I *hope* I'm wrong 🤞🏼 (but fear I *might* be right ☹️).

Hopefully nemehawk is gone for good (in the way they intended) and there is no blowback.
 
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Mugen

Member
Feb 24, 2024
27
1. brown bottles, even without labels and boxes, will be a dead giveaway straight up, no-one will need weeks or an autopsy to *think* 'Halatal'. Emergency services and crime scene investigators deal with suicides (even though any CSIs would then find there was no crime committed), they know the methods, and they know pentobarbital is one that comes in a brown bottle in Peru. It will take minutes, if not seconds, of someone competent observing the scene to reach *a strong suspicion* of the right conclusion. Does word then immediately go out to vendors of Halatal? 🧐🤔

4. the greater the distance and disconnect between source and execution (!), obviously the I *hope* I'm wrong 🤞🏼 (but fear I *might* be right ☹️).

Hopefully nemehawk is gone for good (in the way they intended) and there is no blowback.
Exactly, it's kinda moronic not to see the implications and consequences. For some people N could be the only option to seek out for a peaceful way out. This is not to discredit his suffering or reasons to CTB but also to protect others would like to choose this method.
We could also be talking about people that if failing to achieve their goals would face an even more painful existence (health, financial, legal etc…). Some of us will even struggle to try to cover up the bare basic expenses just to get there. Please kindly use some basic common sense, not trying to dehumanise or discredit someone's departure from this terrestrial plane but as you could see from my previous messages I was trying to make the person aware of the implications of his actions. Thank you.
Excuse my English as it is not my mother tongue, I really hope that semantics don't cloud the message.
 
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