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Archness

Archness

Defective Personel
Jan 20, 2023
429
tbh I'm just waiting to die.

The best I could hope for is to becoming hedonistic and indulge myself. But there's always this cloud, that I'm only ever waiting till death. My reasons to live are increasingly petty as I become less hopeful, the future becoming more dark.

It's not bad enough I'll ctb right now, but maybe later. My mental state is... as if I was living off junk food or something. At some point one can't survive, and I'll just want it to be over with. I'm quite a worthless person who's a burden due to my autism and low IQ anyways.
 
stermc

stermc

libertas quae sera tamen
Nov 24, 2022
950
I could answer this in many ways. I could say I don't want to live because I am not finding happiness here. Because I don't feel - and have never felt at peace. Because I feel like I don't belong this earth and this world.

The correct answer, anyway, would be that I have finally realized I don't fit here. And that doesn't mean I am going to kill myself rn. But it means I am not going to find what I look for in this life. I can live other things, I can find happiness somewhere, but not what I am looking for.
And it's ok. I accept this. And I feel finally at peace.
 
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Gustav Hartmann

Gustav Hartmann

Arcanist
Aug 28, 2021
498
I am 67 and don´t want to end in a nursing home. A recent hospitalization taught me how easily it could happen that I am not able to kill myself anymore. So, in my situation it´s never to early to commit suicide but it can easily be too late.

The second reason is autassassinophilia, unfortunately becoming weaker with the decrease of testosterone.

Why am I still alife? I am afraid to miss something good.
 
TapeMachine

TapeMachine

perpetually confused
Jan 12, 2023
360
Incredibly disappointing and inept brain... For starters, I forget just about everything, almost like I have early-onset alzheimers.

I will never be able to achieve a completely independent lifestyle, thanks to my effing brain. I will always have to rely on others to help me with certain things.

I'm not quite 40 years old yet...

And my brain will just keep getting worse and worse, and I'll either end up homeless or sleeping on the couch of one of impoverished family menbers.

So much for being that "gifted" child with "so much potential"...

(Sorry, this answer isn't brief, lol; but brevity has never been one of my strengths..)
 
G

groucho

Student
Feb 4, 2023
106
Because after 46 years I have realized that I have not been strong enough to end this cycle of bad choices and physical and emotional weakness. I am responsible for every bad decision I have made, and even though I know my weakness, I still fall victim to my fear. I am responsible for my state in life, and it is my responsibility to end it while I still have the strength to make my own choice.
This reasonates so much with me, I read all the posts about people in unbearable pain and I feel so guilt that I'm barely holding onto an ostensibly good life.

It feels like I've had so many opportunities and good luck in my life that I could have done well and been happy but I still manage to mess them up. People seem to think I'm a smart, talented person but I feel like a fraud, a cardboard cut out of a person. To top it off I get no enjoyment out of life and haven't for years. Going on 40 and all I do is worry. There is no hope left in the tank if I have another big set back, I don't want to hurt my family and the friends I have left but I seem destined to suicide or becoming a burden who will eventually isolate themselves and/or lose my mind.

We're seemingly entering a time of great suffering with world finances, climate, and society all on a knife edge. At this point my greatest contribution to the world would be to be one less hungry maw to feed.
 
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M

missingpeace

Arcanist
Feb 4, 2023
432
I loved my life until supernatural entities started getting into my physical and spiritual systems and tormenting me day and night since the past 2 years. I tried everything I could to get rid of them but things have gotten worse, they are unstoppable. I am desperate to leave.
 
D

downndone2

Living in misery
Jan 23, 2022
1,274
Lost everything again and again, cannot find job, owe IRS back taxes, no one around, cannot leave my house again.
 
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E

Escapee

Student
Jan 14, 2023
165
iam related to this there is someone else who control my mind and deny me any rest or relief i want to escape from that person by
ctb
I tell people this.. they don't believe me.... They have been brainwashed by an "Oprah/ Inspirational Speaker Culture" that rejects the idea that just like there are PHYSICAL TERMINAL ILLNESSES, there are MENTAL terminla illnesses..... I mean sure, we could reduce our standard of our quality of life to the dust...... but why bother when we could just stop existing? I'm sorry you suffer freind. Hopefully in the future humans will develop cures for the ailments that today sends us to our graves... :(
the world need to understand the only solution to problems of people like me is death. we need to be encouraged and assisted to die
 
Last edited:
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lonelyy

lonelyy

Crumbling
Feb 22, 2023
10
i dont see myself having a future, and the general idea of life sucks
 
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P

pupsensua1

On the edge of life and death...
Feb 12, 2023
9
Sick of working for happiness, the more I do good, the more I expect from myself which eventually just ends up with me having low highs and high lows.
 
incorporationated

incorporationated

mentally unstable idiot
Jan 24, 2023
78
Constant infighting in the family. Dread.
 
kindalone

kindalone

Student
Mar 1, 2023
172
I'm not able to function/be self-sufficient and I'm always dependent on other people's resources despite being able-bodied. I'm helpless.
 
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B

biboty

Student
Dec 16, 2019
125
life has not been very kind to me and I cannot actively participate in it
 
H

hellchik

New Member
Mar 11, 2023
1
I hate myself with every fiber of my being, and it doesn't feel like there's any people that truly care or love me.
 
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