Do you ever feel like your life isn’t that bad?

[dggtscccvfd]

My life is shit. I have a problem with my breathing, we breathe 11,000 times a day. It's excruciating. I'll CTB soon via SN.

 

[hadenough58]

Sometimes I feel like my life isn't actually that bad. I don't want it to get worse from a failed attempt. That's the main reason why I haven't ctb yet. I don't want to fuck myself and my life up. This fear is keeping me here

I am up and down like an emotional roller coaster, some days I think that everything is going to work out and the next that it is all hopeless but most days just numb.

 

[sserafim]

My life isn't the worst. A normal person could probably turn it around and be content. The problem is ME. The inability to fit in and enjoy social interactions

Same. I don't fit in or enjoy social interactions either. I never thought that I was the problem though. I always thought that society and the world were the problem. Maybe I was the problem all along. Anyways, my life would be much better if I didn't have ASD

 

[touchingthevoid]

My life isn't the worst. A normal person could probably turn it around and be content. The problem is ME. The inability to fit in and enjoy social interactions

This pretty much sums my life up as well

 

[MyChoiceAlone]

you must be running out of questions.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

No, my life is bad. Sure, it may look okay when other people are viewing me from their perspective. However, I genuinely believe that many people would be suicidal if they had the life that I had. At first I thought my life isn't that bad but then I thought about how people would react if they were to be in my shoes and I genuinely think that they would kill themselves. After all, having not a single friend or acquaintance during your entire life as well as being too developmentally fucked to make any friends is bound to drive anyone insane due to how reliant we are on friendships. Not to mention, we are also kinda reliant on having things to look forward to as well as having interests but I don't have any of that. Acknowledging that there is no meaning to this as well as having no reason to live at all since birth would make most people suicidal

I'll admit that my life is far from being the worst as I'm not suffering as extremely as a human being can (yet) but having my type of life will mentally fuck a lot of people over

Never. My life is bad .

imo life is bad for every sentient animal.

The defining characteristic of life is that the unbearable pain or suffering can be
so bad it makes everything else meaningless .

None of pleasurable crap is worth going through even just a few hours of the worst constant pain possible

what am I , a trillion cells , "oh so fun carrying around these cells this chunk of meat every where I go always trapped in the same meat bag'" no it's not fun . Plus u have to constantly feed, Clean it and clean everything. I hate work , chores , problems

Your posts are always so relatable. It's scary as to how bad suffering can get for a human. My life is bad but it definitely is far from the worst because the worst life one can have has no limits to it as suffering has no limits to it

 

[sserafim]

you must be running out of questions.

Wdym

 

[MyChoiceAlone]

i just thought it was a question that was different from the other ones you asked.

 

[divinemistress36]

Exactly this. My mind is f***ed up beyond repair.

By certain standards, I have a good life. A job that gives me enough to live and to save. A decent family. Relatively good health. I should be happy, right?

My mind constantly reminds me of what I don't have: Friends, a partner, a future, any important or valuable achievement within my existence. It reminds me that my emotions are feelings are worthless. Maybe if I could detach myself from all those concepts I could go on without feeling miserable most of the time, but then, I'd be a robot.

Damn faulty brain wiring

 

[theboy]

somtimes

 

[Iamtired]

No my life is objectively bad but I still get on with it somehow, because, like you, the fear of death or even worse, failure is unacceptable. Daily pain, anguish, agoraphobia. Sadness/ anger. Medication withdrawal. Open wound kind of feelings. Severe anhedonia. The only snippets of time when I'm not suffering is when I get to talk to my boyfriend (who somehow Loves me despite my ideation)

 

[Kit1]

It is a mixed bag. I had a really crappy childhood and that is what I am trying to run away from. No child should ever have to go through what I (and so many children) went/go through. It isnthat child who has now given up as I cannot escape from the prison of my memories - which hounds and haunts me through flashbacks, nightmares, dissociation etc - hence the complex PTSD. CFS, autism and other challenges are challenging as well.

However since I managed to leave home an a 14/15 year old and despite further challenges faced in the streets etc (those challenges are nothing compared to everything that happened between birth and leaving the house) - I have led a privileged life with education, secure meaningful employment, a family with my two lovely children and partner that I dearly love and much more. My wish to end my life feels criminal to me given how lucky I am - but that little girl.who was constantly abused, taped and tortured lives on in pain and I know that the NHS is not able to or not willing to offer the required support (long term therapy) to give me a fighting chance to survive on this planet. Long term private therapy is realistically unaffordable for me. The battle.is between a tortured kid who is constantly in pain and the privileged mother who has to survive to ensure her children remain happy. It is certainly a challenging battle.

 

[Iamtired]

My life is good in general and that's all due to my own hard work over the years. I accomplished what I wanted and the things that make my life worse (family who doesn't care about me, no friends, isolation) are things more outside of my control. I can't control others.

Even so, I can't be happy with what I have, it's not enough, my loneliness crushes me and feeling like people that should care about me, don't, don't help. I'm also stuck in a past that was happier. Constantly mourning the people that cared for me but are no longer here - my mom, my grandma and my cat. Life is too lonely and I'm not missed by my family, everyone forgets about me. I'm in my own corner, always needy, sucking all my needs from my boyfriend while he is also lonely with no friends. We only have each other and is not enough.

Ugh I relate to this all too well. Isolation is a literal killer. So is past looping. If you see your family that abused you and you're reminded of the wolves in sheeps clothing You were forced to escape it makes the current pain amplified.


At least you're aware of your boyfriend and your patterns- that's the first step. If you're willing to dig deeper into working to get out of that mindset that you NEED to isolate it's possible you might not always feel this way and create more genuine connection. Trauma literally divides people like us away to the point where we feel like freaks . Hugs & love (please be mindful I'm not preaching I am just speaking from experience)

 

[RosebyAnyName]

I feel like my childhood was not horrible, but far from good. 4/10 wouldn't recommend.
Now that I'm an adult, I think my situation is fair and most people who aren't suicidal would find it acceptable. My problem is that my previous situation left me struggling to cope. It's hard to count my blessings enough to fully appreciate what I have, but I count enough of them to feel guilty for thinking about CtB when I have "so much".

 

[Iris Blue]

Definitely a very good point. I am afraid to do any method from all of the risks if I fail. I've been researching for months and the ones that seem like would have a better chance of working or would have little to no consequence to it are all very hard to obtain.

And although I do feel like life is sucky for me of course I know many other people out there have it worse in many different ways so I do feel a good amount of guilt whenever I think or say any complaints just to be sensitive to everyone else.

 

[NullSz00]

I have everything a normal person would need to be happy. My life isn't bad at all. It's me, I'm the problem (:

This is exactly how I feel.

 

[teniralc21]

I have things I'm very grateful for, to be sure. My life could be much, much worse. My main worry is how much worse it will get in the future when my parents die and if I can't find any sense of community (which has proven impossible in recent years).

 

[ultrasharpy123456]

Most of my problems used to be mental.

 

[Defenestration]

Today. Yes....but After no
Today. Yes....but After no

 

[Leiden]

No, never. I always think the opposite. I wish it wasn't this bad though. I'd take even just a better friggin couple day's at this point. Something!!

 

[emptyenvelopes]

I relate to this. I know my life could be so much worse. I know others with my life would be thrilled. And I wish I could be satisfied with where I'm at. But instead I am weighed down with the shame of not accomplishing these important life milestones/goals.

And those goals are so important to me that I feel like I can't rest and be content with who I am and where I'm at because every second I'm not trying to reach those milestones I'm wasting time.

This is awful but it makes me almost wish I reached those milestones at a young age, then suffered a tragedy and lost them. Because then I would have at least met the goals, had the happiness for a little bit, and then could be content with who I was. I'd let those memories fuel me for the rest of my life.

 

[teniralc21]

I have some good days. I participate in a hobby with a group of about 50 other people (afraid to give details) and every once in a while I just feel like we're a big family and connected and all is well. But it's only for two hours once a week, and I've never really developed close friends with anyone outside the group (although we do talk on Facebook some).

 

[Forever Sleep]

In terms of health, I've been fairly lucky. My life has also been much worse than it is now. Still- that only makes me worry it will one day return to that.

But no, I suppose I don't like life as a thing, so I don't feel obliged to feel grateful for it. I'd prefer it if it hadn't come about at all. I'm only grateful it's no worse!

 

[Hotsackage]

I have people that care but having a brain that literally just toys with u, is not really that fun

 

[bitofftoomuch]

What's most irritating about false hope is that after enough years of it you can find yourself failing to distinguish it from legitimate hope. I blew up a relationship as a result of this. I thought my joy with that person was arbitrary. I could not have been more wrong.

 

[lunar echo]

turning into an adult defintely made me hate life more. i hate being an adult. I dont feel like an adult.

 

[Nlis2244]

My life isn't the worst. A normal person could probably turn it around and be content. The problem is ME. The inability to fit in and enjoy social interactions

I feel somewhat like this. even though i feel that even if i became a normal person it would be very difficult to turn it around. On one hand i feel like i shouldn't be in the situation that i am in, and that it's all my fault. If i see it that way i realize that there are billions of people that have less opportunities than me, yet i still fucked it up. On the other hand, my life really is shitty and hopeless, and i often wonder how is it possible that i allowed myself to become so miserable, much more than anyone i know.

 

[Green Destiny]

I know that my life is significantly better compared to millions of others but that doesn't do anything to make me feel better. Be it fortunate enough to live as another everyday person with a house or on the streets suffering, I did not ask to exist and I did not ask for this life.

 

[TiredOfAllThis]

The problem is likely myself. Being born with autistic spectrum in the 80s USSR, getting through a lot of problems in life, and so on and so forth. Suffering throughout the whole life.

 

[WoodyOak]

`Do you ever feel like your life isn't that bad`?
Yes, but I still don`t want to be here anymore. Doesn`t matter what I have/lucky I don`t have, etc., etc.
I could win the lottery TODAY and still want to check out.