Are you surprised you are still alive?

[always_sad]

Yes I became suicidal at 13 years old. I'm 25 and everything feels wrong. I shouldn't be here. I don't want to be here

 

[Manic Panic]

My own psychiatrist told me she was surprised I was alive after how many overdoses I've done ...

 

[shoothewater]

Yeah, I never thought I'd make it to 30, but here I am. Today, I can't imagine myself reaching 40.

 

[weallhaveourghosts]

Yes, I keep wishing I jumped from the bridge when I had the opportunity but instead turned around. Nothing good from not jumping. I wish my SI wasn't so strong.

Yeah, I never thought I'd make it to 30, but here I am. Today, I can't imagine myself reaching 40.

Literally same. Birthday was on the 19th. I spent it alone because I have no one anymore.

 

[LostHope556]

Honestly low key kinda. I've moved to foreign countries and done risky shit that even the locals refuse to do, gone to scary places, still nothing happened to me.
I've gone 160 miles an hour on motorcycles, in shitty roads, still didn't crash or die. I've done everything I could to see if I could die, and I never have, so yeah, I'm a bit surprised.

nahh, not surpised, im a coward. i do have an "attempt" but its not lethal enough to kill me, im embarassed to even remember about it lol. i do want to die, sure im afraid of the pain in the process of dying, but that's not the big issue. im trapped in my own thoughts, fear of getting into hell even if i dont really believe in religion and god, i just get thaught that way since i was a child so it have been ingrained to me untill now...

Hey I get this 100% that religion garbage gets programmed in deep

Yes I became suicidal at 13 years old. I'm 25 and everything feels wrong. I shouldn't be here. I don't want to be here

Heard. I became suicidal at 7 years old, I'm 29 in May. Sometimes I'm happy I'm here, but shit seems to always remind me that the only way out is death

 

[wiz_miz_03]

I'm not surprised, but I cannot go on like this.

 

[Warriorsfan]

It sucks to still be here.
Hate this disease.
Wish I was gone instead of a few people I knew, that died by accidents.
They all wanted to live!

 

[loser4ever4life]

Yes, was very heavily suicidal since high school, never thought I would see 18. Now im 22, tried to earlier today, surprised I'm still around to type this out

 

[Warriorsfan]

I'm sorry I feel this way.
Especially to the people who love me.
And to God.
I had a lot of good stuff happen.
And a lot of people I'm grateful for.

 

[Rynalia]

Not really, no. My self-sabotage has no allegiance.

 

[Pale_Rider]

IDK how to answer that, because I just am. I expected to be dead those time I tried yes. The fact that I am still here just is. I dont give much thought to that part.

 

[untraveler]

Yeah, I kind of am, I guess... I was supposed to give up a few times for a long time already. And I still fight and try. But it's pointless. I can't win. I'm tired. I don't want to take it anymore. Then why am I still here...

 

[LostLily]

Yup, I'm disappointed in myself in my lack of follow through. I really am bad at everything