When people decide not to ctb that’s a good thing right ??

[Avicii]

I mean I know this is pro choice website and I'm still in shock by Zanex actually going through with it deep down I'd hoped her blog was just a cry for help but if people say they're going to ctb then don't go through with it then that's good right ???

 

[Snackpack29]

Hmmm. I'm relatively new here but so I don't know this Zanex person's situation with why they would want to ctb. But as for people in general I'd personally say it depends on the individuals circumstances.

Are they in constant pain? How bad/frequent is it? What kind of pain?

Without knowing these factors I find it hard to answer the question directly.

 

[bigj75]

Depends. Some people have to ctb out of the future getting worse. If they don't they wish they would have.

Then some of us will probably get better and never ctb.

 

[Angst Filled Fuck Up]

I will always see ctb as a last resort, but I think the point we want to emphasize by way of this website and our collective mentality here is that it's a viable one - not completely off the table as the rest of society deems it to be.

As such I don't think it's ever really a good thing to end your life, but I think it's completely understandable. I wouldn't actively encourage anyone to do it, nor would I frown on someone for doing it. So I try to be neutral in this regard. Prolonged pain, mental illness or horrible life circumstances are no joke. It's everyone's right to manage all that the way they see fit.

 

[josh228]

I mean I know this is pro choice website and I'm still in shock by Zanex actually going through with it deep down I'd hoped her blog was just a cry for help but if people say they're going to ctb then don't go through with it then that's good right ???

Its always a good thing when its from ones own decision and not someone else getting involved. If someone wants to give life a second, third fourth or whatever shot...we only have one life as far as we know and im happy for them.

 

[MEoDP]

One of the regulars here once posted a rant about people who constantly makes "goodbye" posts yet always failing to follow through.

While I understand his sentiment(The "Goodbye posts" lose their integrity and emotional value when you know the poster is just gonna come back in a bit. I'd implore people not to make goodbye posts out of impulse and only do so once you're absolutely sure you can get the job done immediately after.),I'm certainly happy for a person aborting a suicide attempt and subsequently ending up with a life that's worth living. (Hopefully without incurring permanent damage from the failed attempt)

 

[josh228]

One of the regulars here once posted a rant about people who constantly makes "goodbye" posts yet always failing to follow through.

While I understand his sentiment(The "Goodbye posts" lose their integrity and emotional value when you know the poster is just gonna come back in a bit. I'd implore people not to make goodbye posts out of impulse and only do so once you're absolutely sure you can get the job done immediately after.),I'm certainly happy for a person aborting a suicide attempt and subsequently ending up with a life that's worth living. (Hopefully without incurring permanent damage from the failed attempt)

how on earth can you be 100% sure after a goodbye post? If it were up to me I would not allow goodbye posts on this forum for several reason but its not my forum.

 

[weedoge]

First of all, something so subjective can t really be good or bad in my book. It just is. Its only as good or bad as the individual decides.

Death is a given and neutral fact of life.

Secondly please stop saying her name, you're obsessed and it is getting suspicious at least in my book.

 

[skitliv]

Secondly please stop saying her name, you're obsessed and it is getting suspicious at least in my book.

Finally someone said it, thanks

I also agree with the rest of your post

 

[MEoDP]

how on earth can you be 100% sure after a goodbye post? If it were up to me I would not allow goodbye posts on this forum for several reason but its not my forum.

What I mean is having your resources at hand and you being reasonably sure that your attempt will be successful. (of course,anything can happen and your attempt gets foiled,but a lot of people will blurt out a goodbye post out of impulse and make an impromptu attempt which may not end well.)

 

[weedoge]

One of the regulars here once posted a rant about people who constantly makes "goodbye" posts yet always failing to follow through.

While I understand his sentiment(The "Goodbye posts" lose their integrity and emotional value when you know the poster is just gonna come back in a bit. I'd implore people not to make goodbye posts out of impulse and only do so once you're absolutely sure you can get the job done immediately after.),I'm certainly happy for a person aborting a suicide attempt and subsequently ending up with a life that's worth living. (Hopefully without incurring permanent damage from the failed attempt)

On the subject of repeated goodbye posts. I think its trivial if those people don't cause any type of disturbance. Let them go through their experience as they need, you're not obligated to make a heartfelt response every time and it's absolutely fair to say that as it becomes more clear that you don't know whether you expect their attempt to be successful you might know less of what to say without seeming condescending towards the OP. I think people making these posts understand that too and we can have that mutual understanding without being judgemental or harsh.

Really just don't respond if its upsetting

 

[MEoDP]

On the subject of repeated goodbye posts. I think its trivial if those people don't cause any type of disturbance. Let them go through their experience as they need, you're not obligated to make a heartfelt response every time and it's absolutely fair to say that as it becomes more clear that you don't know whether you expect their attempt to be successful you might know less of what to say without seeming condescending towards the OP. I think people making these posts understand that too and we can have that mutual understanding without being judgemental or harsh.

Really just don't respond if its upsetting

I understand that. Just expressing my honest thoughts and feelings. PatKat was being harsh about it with his rant,but I understand how difficult it truly is to make that final decision.

 

[Trashcan]

Like other users said, it depends. Sometimes people do have the potential to get better and it's great that they recovered and are doing well. Other times, people's situations just don't get better. For example, someone with a mental illness that is resistant to treatment. Or a chronic or terminal illness. Maybe they're homeless and just don't have the skills to be employable or don't want to work in a minimum wage job for the rest of their lives. In the end, it's up to the individual to decide whether or not suicide is the right choice. We can only see what they're going through on the outside. Only that person knows truly what it's like to be them, to have their brain and their body. There may be things going on that an outsider cannot see or experience.

 

[Time2Go?]

This is only my second day on this forum and I have posted more here than any other forum in my life. (And considering I was well an adult before the internet was created that's saying something). I have really found something here that I understand though. I have always thought of suicide as an option for me, but I could never tell anyone. I did once and got locked up. I like what Angst said, I doubt I will do it. Too many people depend on me for real shit. Just being on this site and seeing that other people feel like I do makes me feel less alone.

But to the point I think if someone decides not to do it then it wasn't the right decision for them at that point in time. Therefore it should be viewed as a good thing.

Mattie

 

[Donewith_]

I mean I know this is pro choice website and I'm still in shock by Zanex actually going through with it deep down I'd hoped her blog was just a cry for help but if people say they're going to ctb then don't go through with it then that's good right ???

Yup.. surely. How ever it might sound.. but a person who has terminal illness(be it physical or mental) and knew from experiencing it from years that he cannot endure that pain any longer.. and is desperately wanting to leave that body permanently.so they ctb'ed.
Another person who depressed by the series of negative incidents in his life(or was falsely accused or suffering without his fault,hope you get the point).. which hit him to the rock bottom,left alone..decided to ctb since there is no other choice. But, such circumstances were created that help was provided to raise him out of them.. Literally, hope was there..So they choose life.
Both of these are as apt. as they seem. It is of human nature(or nature of some animals as far as we humans can understand, I have observed that nature in few species of animals too) we can't stand loss of life . But, I feel that's for good.

Sorry for long post..

 

[VincentValentine]

I dunno. I can't speak for others, because I don't know what others are going through.

But for me, I was first suicidal when I was 18. I was suicidal then up until the problem I was going through was resolved at the time, so after it was over I wasn't suicidal for the time being. But considering the years and years of hardship I've been through since then, I wish I would've ctb'd either during or immediately after that event was over. It would've saved me years of grief. So for me personally, in that instance deciding not to ctb back then was ultimately bad.

 

[MEoDP]

I dunno. I can't speak for others, because I don't know what others are going through.

But for me, I was first suicidal when I was 18. I was suicidal then up until the problem I was going through was resolved at the time, so after it was over I wasn't suicidal for the time being. But considering the years and years of hardship I've been through since then, I wish I would've ctb'd either during or immediately after that event was over. It would've saved me years of grief. So for me personally, in that instance deciding not to ctb back then was ultimately bad.

This is definitely something noteworthy. The common saying that suicide is permanent solution to a temporary problem is a thoughtless cliche. Fact of the matter is,even if your specific problem does come to pass,new problems will still come into your life later on. I'm experiencing this first hand. (Bullies used to be the bane of my existence pre-college. Now,I have to deal with the fact that I was unable to build any study habits because of the aforementioned problem and am forced to deal with the problem of graduating college....I wonder what's next? Working a typical 9-5 job,a horror I hope to avoid)

If you sent my consciousness back in time to when I was at kindergarten,letting my child-self absorb all my current knowledge and experiences,I most certainly would have tried to CTB,knowing what horrors I'm going to face for decades of my life. (or maybe I would have tried to better my life at first,which would probably end in failure so I likely would have CTB'ed soon after anyway.)

A more realistic scenario; If I were sentenced to 20 years in prison,I would definitely do my best to try and off myself while I still could. Sure,I know that after 20 years,I would be freed,but the amount of guaranteed future suffering serving my sentence would not have been worth it for me for a minuscule chance at happiness as an old man. (likely unemployable and no skills due to time behind bars)

 

[Mr2005]

It is for those around them. For them it's different in each case. If I'm happy someone here doesn't do it but they want to then who am I happy for?

 

[Kev]

Like others have said, the answer boils down to: "it depends". It's a very complex question, and the answer is not black and white.

If someone is in a situation where they cannot improve their own life, whether it is due to the circumstances of their life (like a terminal illness) or the effort required to do so is so monumental that someone in such a low, depressed state could not even begin to put forth that kind of effort or determination to do so, then perhaps rationally we can call it a good thing that a sentient being is no longer suffering.

However, if someone decides to CTB on an impulse, when in reality their situation could improve, they have the energy and will to do so, and they have not exhausted all their options, then yes it is a good thing because it gives that person a second chance to turn their life around.

Obviously, many different factors play into whether a life is repairable or not, and many times even the suicidal person, who knows themselves the best, cannot determine the answer to that, so there's no way we could without really knowing the life of the person in question.

 

[Schopenhauer]

Really, it depends. If they decide not to ctb and live a good life afterwards, then that's a good thing. If they get cold feet and have a miserable, unsatisfying existence, then it's just more unnecessary human suffering. I just don't think being alive has intrinsic value.

Too many people give up because of external pressures, and the poor availability of suitable methods.

 

[MEoDP]

Really, it depends. If they decide not to ctb and live a good life afterwards, then that's a good thing. If they get cold feet and have a miserable, unsatisfying existence, then it's just more unnecessary human suffering. I just don't think being alive has intrinsic value.

Too many people give up because of external pressures, and the poor availability of suitable methods.

Schopenhauer...I'm familiar with that name. Fellow Antinatalist?

 

[Schopenhauer]

Schopenhauer...I'm familiar with that name. Fellow Antinatalist?

The original Schopenhauer is sometimes regarded as antinatalist (he regarded suffering as always more prevalent than happiness). Personally, I don't have a well thought-out, coherent view on the subject. I think most people do enjoy their lives and are glad to exist; we're the outliers...