What's the loneliest thing you've ever done?

[ohhgeeitsme]

Sure, I guess my suicide attempts were the loneliest, but if we're talking cringey and pathetic, I think I win this one.
When I was around 14, I had a public Livejournal. All my "friends" on there were living in cities and had really social and interesting lives and I lived in a tiny town out in the country. So I would just straight up lie about what I did each day and pretend I had more of social life than I did. It was really subtle and believable, so no one would have expected any of it not to be true. I once even added an arm in the corner of a picture so it looked like I was sitting next to someone. YEAH. The worst part? My family had been reading it the whole time and laughing behind my back about it. What's even worse than that? My brother had told people in school so some of them were reading it too. One of his friends, who I was starting to talk to a lot in one class, felt sorry for me and ended up telling me about it. I seriously considered jumping off a bridge. Even if no one had found out, it would still be super cringey and embarrassing to me now. I did some really weird stuff back then.

 

[Sherri]

Being parked in front of the beach during winter for hours and hours, just with the radio on, thinking about life, the past, the future.

 

[stygal]

Ever since childhood I played board games with/against myself. I also imagine lots of conversations with others in my head instead of actually having them.
I also lied to my family about going to friends houses/gatherings or parties (to appear more social) and instead I went hiking or sat somewhere reading.

 

[throwaway123]

Ever since childhood I played board games with/against myself. I also imagine lots of conversations with others in my head instead of actually having them.
I also lied to my family about going to friends houses/gatherings or parties (to appear more social) and instead I went hiking or sat somewhere reading.

that's interesting I can relate to having imaginative conversations with others. I always thought I was the only one doing that.

 

[Symbiote]

Ever since childhood I played board games with/against myself. I also imagine lots of conversations with others in my head instead of actually having them.
I also lied to my family about going to friends houses/gatherings or parties (to appear more social) and instead I went hiking or sat somewhere reading.

I did that too, would imagine how a conversation would play out but never really opened my mouth to start a conversation.

 

[Intotheflames]

Technically, that would be I was alone for my birthday, but then I never have my birthday celebrated so I got so used to it that it's no big deal.

Feeling wise, the loneliest I ever felt was the moment, during Xmas Eve street performance, I realized I was literally the only one alone in the midst of the crowd.

 

[LONE WOLF.]

About 20 year's ago l found myself stranded in Leicester and ended up walking to Peterborough along the A47/A147 l'm not sure which road it was but l do remember it was snowing and about minus -3, as l walked overnight threw the snow and blizzard in summer clothing l was reminded of just how alone l was in the world! it was so dark l could barely see a ft in front of me,there was no moon and No one stopped for me(No surprise) around 3am l was so numb with cold l knew l had to keep walking or drop and that Hypothermia was kicking in, l began walking at 8:15pm and finally got a lift at 14:30pm, when l got to Peterborough l had blister's on my feet the size of eggs and it took 3 weeks for my feet to recover! One of the lowest points in my existence at age 27.

 

[deadspirit]

Sometimes when I want to get out of the house I'll just hop into my car and drive in complete silence around my hometown thinking about past memories and events.

 

[ElPaso]

I ran a study on the other side of the US for a grad student project I was working on, got on a plane, and got into O'Hare at 11pm. I drove 5 hours back to my job the next day with a one hour map at a gas station where I parked my car.

I tried to sleep but looked at pictures of my cheating ex and how much better her life was than mine.

 

[262653]

Playing Serious Sam: The First Encounter in co-op mode with 4 players. As you might have guessed already, I was controlling all of them.

 

[Fehler]

Take my hand or arm imagining that someone else is doing it. But I do that often at night. The loneliest thing I have ever done, I imagine it will have been at the end of the year, that I usually spend it alone, one year affected me more than usual and for a few moments, I celebrate as if there were more people.

 

[140 bpm]

I guess... my last birthday which I've spent on a truck stop somewhere in North Dakota. Just drinking beer and listening music in the car. It was ugly weather btw. A lot of snow. Had to keep heater working whole night.

 

[Symbiote]

Paid a friend to hang out with me during my 21st birthday only to have him ditch me for his group of friends.

Sometimes I went to the club alone, drink alone, dance by myself, and then leave without no one saying hi or asking what I'm doing there. Invisible to the world baby!

 

[L I F E T O L O S E]

stay locked in my room for 3 years

 

[MiserableBastard1995]

Sometimes when I want to get out of the house I'll just hop into my car and drive in complete silence around my hometown thinking about past memories and events.

I do that too, but on a bicycle. Circumstances have forced me to get my learners', so it'll be good to be able do that in a car, eventually.

Hard to pick a loneliest thing when your whole life's been that way - not to disparage others' experiences, we all live different lives.
But I'd say mine was at 14-ish. Developed a crush on the robot "Eve" in Wall-E, then created a fictional girlfriend with the same name, and myself, as characters in The Sims2 , and lived vicariously though that little pixel teenager for about 2 years.

 

[BandAddict]

There are so many things I could say, but the first thing that came to mind was going to senior prom by myself lmao

 

[Dr Iron Arc]

These days whenever I'm resting I lie face down but with my head slightly above the ground. Then I loosen my mouth/lips and let gravity take effect so that it feels vaguely like someone pulling at my lips like I'm being kissed, which I've still never had despite being 27.

 

[lofticries]

I honestly try to create an imaginary friend in my head to get me through moments where I feel the most anxious. For example when I had a dentist appointment some months ago. Never works and I suffer alone in my anxiety anyway but still I try.

 

[WornOutLife]

Becoming a NEET was certainly the loneliest thing that has ever happened to me.

Also, I talk to my dog and hug my pillow pretending it's a girl I love lol

 

[signifying nothing]

The times that I went on holiday alone were probably some of the loneliest and saddest of my life, though on paper they should have been some of the best. In retrospect, I was probably at my most emotionally numb and anhedonic. Those years were the beginning of the end for my maintaining the appearance of a 'normal' kind of life.

 

[killedbypsychiatry]

eat my lunch in the bathroom in middle school because I had no friends
or right now that I can't leave my house and have no more friends because of my illness and no one longer cares about me. now I literally tell my problems to my dog because he's the only one who listens and doesn't invalidate me. I also talk with myself more frequently now idk if that's because I've lost so much human connection.

 

[UseItOrLoseIt]

Spending prom night and other similar occasions in a car cause I couldn't handle my social anxiety and the feeling of inadequacy.

 

[GenesAndEnvironment]

Jacked off so much I bent my tiny penis out of shape.

 

[UseItOrLoseIt]

Jacked off so much I bent my tiny penis out of shape.

You're getting too jacked to jack off.

 

[narval]

not making friends, meeting or even talk more than a sentence in a conversation with anyone for a year and a half while studying at, let's call it, programming school. At that time i barely knew the name of any classmate (and less right now XD). Not like i was bullied or so, just go to class, pay attention, stay alone in the break, pay attention again, gtfo.

 

[LONE WOLF.]

Wrapped my own Christmas presents and filled my own sock with things I already own and a box of chocolates. I love to wrap gifts, put up the tree and open things on Christmas morning. Unfortunately its just me and I don't have many people to buy gifts for. Last year I put inspirational quotes in some Christmas cards I bought at the dollar store and gave them to myself.

I do something similar but for my Dog, l fill up his Xmas doggy stocking and buy Dog toys and Treat's and wrap them all up individually and place them under the Xmas tree, and even get him a Xmas card! Then l prepare a Xmas dinner for us both and we sit down to our Xmas dinners and watch her Madge's annual waffle! Bless her, So you're not alone @Done at Fifty :-)

Jacked off so much I bent my tiny penis out of shape.

You could always use it as a fishing hook, you might even get a Nibble? :-)

 

[Judah]

Sometimes I eat at the table while I look at photos and videos that I have with my partner, who committed suicide. When I get home I imagine that she is waiting for me with a cup of coffee.

 

[Bagger]

I've once sent myself an SMS with birthday wishes. It was only one message I've got that day.

 

[FuneralCry]

Most things I do are considered lonely. Some nights I have been unable to sleep and I lie there in a dark room with just my thoughts. I reflect on my life and think about death.

 

[whywere]

I've once sent myself an SMS with birthday wishes. It was only one message I've got that day.

Your post really hit home for me and really made me sorry and sad for you. I was: "the mistake" till 18 and kicked out by my "parents". I know what it is like, I am 65 years young, what it is and feels like when nobody thinks OR cares. BUT..BUT YOU have the entire global family now here and we are ONE huge loving and caring group of the finest folks in this world. I send you a late HAPPY BIRTHDAY for the time you did not get any, that is purely WRONG, and I will not let that slide by, and also the aspect that YOU are loved and cared about here and I am proud to call you a part of our family here!!!!! Sending you lots of hugs, love and a beautiful sunny day! Walter