Am I in the wrong for not wanting to call or video call my bf every day (this is a rhetorical question, btw)? We are in a ldr and I have to hide the relationship from my family since they wouldn't be too pleased about me being in a relationship with some older dude I met online. He tries to video call me and call me on the phone daily and I keep on telling him that while I'm fine with us texting each other every day I don't see us video calling or talking on the phone every day to be realistic due to the risk of my mom finding out. I told him that we should try doing it every once a week instead, but he doesn't agree. He gets offended and talks about how he doesn't like me hiding our relationship, even though he acknowledges that my mom wouldn't be happy if she found out. He claims that I should tell her soon, despite me having told him that she'll make me block him if I do. He keeps on bringing up me being an adult and about how he told his mom, but he's older than me and lives on his own. His mom wouldn't be able to do anything to stop him, but my mom could. To add to this, his mom isn't the same as my mom.
He has also gone on to put little effort into giving me a heads up whenever he wants to video call, despite me telling him to because I don't want to risk my mom walking by and finding out. He always brings up that we "must not be in a relationship then" or about how I "don't want to be his girlfriend" or about us breaking up whenever I don't answer his calls, as though I'm always doing so purpose. He texted me this
I think I probably should find somebody else I can't do this when I want to talk to my girl I should be able to talk to her anytime I want so yeah I don't think this is going to work which sucks
On Friday, which caused me to panic. I immediately video-called him and he acted like nothing happened.
I feel bad. I went on to the ldr subreddit and found that there were a lot of couples who claimed that they would chat with their partners every day for hours.
I also don't like how all of our video calls turn sexual. I understand that he gets horny very easily, but it's really annoying, especially since it'll involve me having to make some very comprising poses and I'm scared about my mom barging in and getting caught like that. It nearly happened once. He'll also sometimes keep on trying to get me to do things, even when I tell him I don't want to, repeating said demand over and over again or saying "yes" on repeat. It's annoying. Sometimes he'll respect my wishes for a bit and then ask me to do it again a little bit later. I don't like how our video calls nearly always turn into him demanding that I take off my clothes. They can actually be very nice when he isn't thinking with his other head.
I also don't like video calling or talking on the phone in general. I've never been into that kind of stuff. I find it draining for me, which only makes this entire ordeal even more stressful.
It's all starting to make me feel miserable.
I'm not completely innocent here. There have been a few times where I blew up at him over text, sending him a shitload of text messages that are usually a mixture of me complaining about my frustrations with him and then apologizing a whole bunch once it has hit me what I've just done and there have been two instances where I ended our video calls out of frustration.
Also, please do not make any assumptions about my bf based on my vent posts about him. He's a very lovely person and these posts are just me venting about him. You cannot assume much about him or about anyone who I make vent posts about, as I'm only talking about one or a few aspects of them, so you are not getting the full picture.
