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kaleidoscopedreams

kaleidoscopedreams

waste of space-space of waste
Jun 10, 2023
24
I had to think of it on the fly. But kaleidoscope dreams reminds me of the "Midnight Gospel" show on Netflix & of a song by Tame Impala called Lost In Yesterday
 
sadidiot0328

sadidiot0328

I feel like I died long ago
Jun 1, 2023
45
My name's meaning for this forum is:

Saudade (English: /saʊˈdɑːdə/,[1] European Portuguese: [sɐwˈðaðɨ], Galician: [sawˈðaðɪ]; plural saudades)[2] is an emotional state of melancholic or profoundly nostalgic longing for a beloved yet absent something or someone. It is often associated with a repressed understanding that one might never encounter the recipient of longing ever again. It is a recollection of feelings, experiences, places, or events— often illusive —[citation needed]​ that cause a sense of separation from the exciting, pleasant, or joyous sensations they once caused. It derives from the Latin word for solitude.[3]

Nascimento and Meandro (2005)[4] cite Duarte Nunes Leão's definition of saudade: "Memory of something with a desire for it."

In Brazil, the day of Saudade is officially celebrated on 30 January.[5][6] It is not a widely acknowledged day in Portugal.

from wikipedia lmao
0328 is the month and day I was born, my profile picture is my cat. sadidiot is a bit corny but It's the best name I could think of when I was registering.
 
Al.ce

Al.ce

Looking for Truck-kun to isekai my a$$
Jun 11, 2023
19
Al.ce is simply my name with a . instead of the i (I know, very original...). My pfp is from my favorite animated movie of all time: Porco Rosso (that thing is a goddamn masterpiece). I think that particular screenshot captures perfectly my general state of being
 
HeroinTears

HeroinTears

I care
Jun 10, 2023
45
HeroinTears - Opioids are my DOC and I thought it was fitting, since they bring me tears of pain and joy, ironically.

profile pic - I always keep my belly full of pills. Especially when that special time comes... ;-;
 
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SunnyDay_NoSunshine

SunnyDay_NoSunshine

Member
Jun 11, 2023
36
It summarizes my belief which is: first try to find sunny days, and then try to get rid of the clouds and if for unsurmountable reasons you are still not getting sunshine then choose a damn reliable method that can make your situation better and not any worse. So here to gain knowledge and provide help regarding both sides of the coin.

My profile pic shows both sunshine and clouds. For me the clouds are moving in and it is pretty dark. Still have some little hope that the clouds could clear but I am not fully betting on that alone.
 
W

Why Me?

-
Apr 5, 2022
270
At 10 years old, I was diagnosed with severe ulcerative colitis, which is an extremely painful disease. My large intestine was covered in bleeding ulcers. Also, the side effects of the medications were so depressing. My face was very bloated and my hair was falling out. I used to look up to God, and ask, why me? I have a whole lot of other extremely unlucky things happen to me, so at 42 years old, the question still pops up in my mind, why me? At least I logically now know that it's not because God hates me or I'm cursed, it's because there is no God, and bad things just randomly happen to people by chance, including children. But even knowing that, I still ask, why me? Especially because my issues are so unlucky & such a rare combination.
 
crimsonpool

crimsonpool

hikikomori
May 15, 2023
96
my name is taken from the lyrics to helpless child by swans and my profile picture is takashima zakuro because i relate to her
 
illvoid

illvoid

he/it
Aug 11, 2022
112
im ill, im void. pfp is gerard way with teal roots bc it gives me something nice to look at when im feeling down enough to log on here
 
ThroughTheLight

ThroughTheLight

Member
May 8, 2023
12
Through The Light is sort of a metaphor for ctb. It was the name of an online suicide forum in a book I read. My pfp is supposed to depict going through the light.
 
D

DurkheimsCat

Member
May 27, 2023
57
Emile Durkheim was a sociologist and philosopher who wrote On Suicide and it was my first introduction to the rationale behind suicide without shame + cat because the only joy I had was my cats.
 
steppenwolf

steppenwolf

Student
Oct 25, 2023
115
NECRO

Der Steppenwolf is a 1926 poetical novel by Hermann Hesse, about a middle-aged writer living in interbellum Germany who believes himself to be half-man half-wolf. He speaks out against the preparations for World War II, and contemplates suicide when no one understands him. My avatar is a detail from the animated section of the 1974 film adaptation of the book, drawn by Jaroslav Bradáč.
 
Division Day

Division Day

It's life that scares me to death
Oct 28, 2023
155
It's an Elliott Smith song.

"The moon stood up on the ridge
Looking down where the water shines
And a man looking over the bridge
Like he'd done so many times
Thinking about how to stay out
Out of trouble's way
Flying to fall away from you all
It's over, division day
Beautiful division day"
 
MelancholyDolly

MelancholyDolly

Lolita ♡ I am a human doll
Oct 28, 2023
29
All my name means is I like collecting dolls and I'm a sad bitch. Chobits pfp cuz she's basically a human doll and what I wish I could be.
 
fallintotheshadows

fallintotheshadows

Member
Oct 23, 2023
52
The pfp is Sunny from omori hugging Basil who as you can tell is reacting poorly to it. Thats practically me whenever i get a hug i cant feel physical affection it seems so it is always despair everytime i receive it. the other thing is that my name fallintotheshadows is from final fantasy dissidia which is a line that Sephiroth uses whenever he dies is that "I'll fall into the shadows"
 
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Goku Black

Goku Black

Global Mod
Jun 5, 2023
3,131
My profile includes the name of one of my favorite Samurai clans that I've learnt about. A prominent family that rose to the position of Kanto-Kanrei established under Uesugi Noriaki in the Muromachi Bakufu, fell from power after the emergence of the Odawara Hojo but rose again to be a powerful Sengoku clan under the leadership of the one the most fearsome and powerful warlords of the period, Uesugi Terutora (Kenshin).
 
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Exiled

Exiled

I gave so many signs
Jun 17, 2023
291
401kill is a song by my favorite band Rise Against that talks about the meaninglessness of working our lives away 9-5 and feeling like a cog in the wheel with nothing to gain. I replaced kill with kind, because in my mind I want to invest in spreading tenderness & love instead of some future I may or may not even have. And, my profile picture is Taylor Swift because a huge reason why I haven't CTB'd is because of the community she has created. I've found so much solace in her music and in her as a person. When I post about wanting to die on here, I just want a little reminder as to why I keep going and my username and profile picture do exactly that.
 
princexhhn

princexhhn

call me prince
Sep 26, 2023
109
i typed out a keyboard smash for my user cause i couldnt think of what to call myself on this site lol. i wanted to stay anonymous, where anyone i know outside sasu will not recognize that it is me (in the rare case they even happen upon sasu). ive decided a few days after making an account, though, that ill just call myself prince. im trans and its an old name i used to go by. nobody knows me as prince, its perfect, and i quite like the name. my profile picture means nothing, its just whatever i think looks cool on my profile haha
 
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figurehead

figurehead

Student
Sep 27, 2023
115
My name's meaning for this forum is:

Saudade (English: /saʊˈdɑːdə/,[1] European Portuguese: [sɐwˈðaðɨ], Galician: [sawˈðaðɪ]; plural saudades)[2] is an emotional state of melancholic or profoundly nostalgic longing for a beloved yet absent something or someone. It is often associated with a repressed understanding that one might never encounter the recipient of longing ever again. It is a recollection of feelings, experiences, places, or events— often illusive —[citation needed]​ that cause a sense of separation from the exciting, pleasant, or joyous sensations they once caused. It derives from the Latin word for solitude.[3]

Nascimento and Meandro (2005)[4] cite Duarte Nunes Leão's definition of saudade: "Memory of something with a desire for it."

In Brazil, the day of Saudade is officially celebrated on 30 January.[5][6] It is not a widely acknowledged day in Portugal.

from wikipedia lmao
Yes, saudade is a Portuguese word. It's really nice as a translation into English doesn't exist. It's a very tenuous feeling/sensation in relation to something/someone you long for.
As for my profile picture here it comes from the promotional pictures of the album Pornography by The Cure.
 
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broth0100

broth0100

i’m not in the tide i be under it, Jaws
Oct 23, 2023
114
broth cuz i love soup (best food, easy to eat when u dont feel like eating) and pfp is just a meme i found n i saved it cuz its silly and reminds me of my brazilian friends
 
WeDontKnowTheFuture

WeDontKnowTheFuture

Student
Feb 3, 2023
137
i choose mine because when i register To SS, I had hope left.
 
LonelyStarrySky

LonelyStarrySky

they/them, menhera
Oct 27, 2023
75
My name is LonelyStarrySky because it is connected with night which is my favourite time of the day, and I feel really lonely because of being abanonded so many times and struggled to make meaningfull and lasting friendships.

My profile picture is Akane Kurokawa from the manga/anime Oshi no Ko. Spoilers from here: she is a character who really resonated with me. She was bullied on twitter because of something she did on reality tv dating show and she attempted CTB. I cried while watching her moments and after that she really resonated with me a lot. I like that she stayed alive because I got to see more of her. But it would have been more tragic if she did pass away. I can talk about that manga so much because it is my favourite.
 
supergip

supergip

A strange person.
May 13, 2023
72
My name's meaning for this forum is:

Saudade (English: /saʊˈdɑːdə/,[1] European Portuguese: [sɐwˈðaðɨ], Galician: [sawˈðaðɪ]; plural saudades)[2] is an emotional state of melancholic or profoundly nostalgic longing for a beloved yet absent something or someone. It is often associated with a repressed understanding that one might never encounter the recipient of longing ever again. It is a recollection of feelings, experiences, places, or events— often illusive —[citation needed]​ that cause a sense of separation from the exciting, pleasant, or joyous sensations they once caused. It derives from the Latin word for solitude.[3]

Nascimento and Meandro (2005)[4] cite Duarte Nunes Leão's definition of saudade: "Memory of something with a desire for it."

In Brazil, the day of Saudade is officially celebrated on 30 January.[5][6] It is not a widely acknowledged day in Portugal.

from wikipedia lmao
Super = first name of a game
GIP = acronym for a website
Basically at the time of creating my name here on SS I was thinking and thinking, until I saw the google chrome favorites and joined the two.

My profile photo is where I was born.
 
sadwriter

sadwriter

In recovery (no longer active)
Aug 29, 2023
176
Profile picture is the characters in Omori just because I love that game & its portrayal of metal health issues (and plus only like two people in my real life know that I've played it/ what it even is). Name is a nod to my career aspiration and the fact that I'm depressed as hell.
 
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BRAINWORMS

BRAINWORMS

dust to dust
Jul 20, 2020
97
I playfully call my mental health conditions "brainworms" when I'm feeling especially unwell. Like "oooo the brainworms are really at it again today," or "I got the depression brainworms kicking my ass." My icon is a gif from one of my favorite musicians, iamamiwhoami, who started out making cryptic music videos with no indication of the identities of the people creating them. The lightbulb imagery seemed fitting when it comes to active ideation. It's also from a video that came out during one of my first really serious suicidal depressive episodes.
 
annointed_towers

annointed_towers

Cursed by God
Dec 9, 2022
253
My name is my name in Latin and Spanish. My pic is one of my favorite plushies.
 
PGFMelly

PGFMelly

Member
Jul 19, 2023
38
My name is a mix of two rap names, PGFNuk and YNWMelly, the pfp is my dreamself, owning three guns to shoot myself with,