I'll give this a try.
I'm not really looking for a "recovery" partner, so much as just a close friend I can talk to about these subjects (and others, of course) while my exit is on ice. The current plan is to stick around for like another 10 years for the sake of my family and I think it would be a lot easier to wade through this with someone like-minded around me for mutual support. The forums are nice but they don't really replace a personal connection.
The problem is that I don't really form bonds all that easily and find that most people either have the personalities of cardboard cutouts or incompatible values.
I don't really get anything out of talking to people who I can't relate to, so I need someone who's quite similar to me. So I guess should write a bit about what I'm all about. Well, I'm on this forum for one thing, that should probably tell you that I'm not exactly thriving in this life. :) In fact I dislike it, it's a chore and a bother. I'm 28, a guy, working in a meaningless dead-end job. I'm lucky enough in the sense that I have decent health and I'd say I'm fairly intelligent (except when it comes to anything practical, then I'm dumb as shit), I have decent self-esteem, etc. In good times I can get through my days fairly untroubled, but then there's the bad times...
I'd consider myself an antinatalist, I think it was a really unfortunate turn of events that life ever developed on this planet. And then my birth was just the apex of the tragedy. lmao. I'm no activist about AN but I find that it's a good thing to mention to weed out incompatible people. If you don't feel like it makes a lot of sense then we see the world in fundamentally different ways.
Hmm, what else? I'd say that if we do hit it off, I'm a good friend. I take interest in my friends and make time for them. I'm mostly pretty breezy in my convos, I'm rarely fully serious about even the darkest of topics and I like people who are the same. People that like dark humor and aren't serious, practical people. I'd like someone who's a proficient texter, isn't dry af, is chatty, fun, silly, etc. All that good stuff. Oh, also I'd really prefer people around my age, I'm especially wary about talking to people under 20 or so, it makes me feel like I'm supposed to be a role-model or a good influence or something and that's not a role I'm comfortable with.
Idk, not really expecting much from this but maybe it won't hurt to try. If you feel like this spoke to you, please do reach out! Even if you stumble upon this months from now, feel free to message me, I expect I'll still be looking for people.
Shit, this got way too long :) Sorry.