41 year old guy in the US.
I've been struggling with depression and suicidal thoughts for at least the last decade, kicked off by some brutal bullying in college that destroyed my life. These feelings have gotten worse in recent years, ever since I lost a close friend of mine in 2019. I knew her for several years, it was a painful experience of getting very close and then seeing things inexorably deteriorate over the last handful of years. The life situation my chronic long term depression had placed me in made me powerless to change anything or prevent our drifting apart.
In the time since she passed, I've made a few attempts at recovery but they haven't succeeded. These suffocating lockdowns going on all over the world have made it very difficult to meet new people and make friends. The thing I struggle the most with these days is the pronounced feeling of isolation and loneliness, which leads to bouts of sharp despair that bring me to the verge of tears.
It would be nice to make some new friends with shared interests, who are accepting and can empathize with the darker feelings of life I mentioned above. I am an emotional/empathic person and am good with supporting close/trusted friends in those areas.
As for my interests, I've watched a ton of anime over the years and still do, I probably qualify as a weeb. I used to game a lot, I haven't as much lately but in the past I played various titles like Stardew Valley, Splatoon, most of the Zeldas including botw, Terraria, and jrpgs. Some other things I'm into are programming, reading (mostly VNs in recent years) and music.
