Random thoughts

[lost illusions]

Didn't hurt anything or anyone, made it back from Cali ok ish haha

 

[Roulette]

Trying to sleep sucks
My eyes are watery and nose is stuffy. I guess that means I want to cry.
But I just want to sleep, not cry. This feels so pathetic. Can't remember the last time I cried.

 

[Xerxes]

I gotta do it soon, otherwise my wife will find out and try to institutionalize me for good.

 

[Trashcan]

I'm probably going to ctb over winter break. There are a few reasons why I'm opposed to doing it before.

 

[Jodes]

"You just have to put the effort in".
"Only you can change your life".
"You have to be able to look after yourself."

Now I remember again why I was going to CTB. I dont think I have much fucking choice for a comfortable life. That "effort" is not fucking coming easily. If it was, I would've be doing things ffs.

More and more I feel like I'm pretty much done. Some part of me, or maybe just those around me, haven't quite caught up with it yet.

 

[Jodes]

I'm considering renting a hotel room on Sunday and ctb then. So many things are pushing me over the edge this week. So many things.

What things? Small things too?

 

[stargazer]

Should I have the bacon and egg Mcmuffin today or the Big Mac? Who am I kidding, I'll just order both at separate times. Yum! A special treat

 

[worldexploder]

Would you French kiss anyone right after they ate a Big Mac? Or would you make them brush first?

 

[Pineapplecrown]

Four hour chat ban

 

[Pineapplecrown]

Four hour chat ban

I just wann get back in the chat

 

[worldexploder]

Four hour chat ban

How come? :(

 

[Pineapplecrown]

Something i said hours ago to a user was "abusive" n went against the rules. I just wanna go back into the chat!

 

[Trashcan]

What things? Small things too?

Mainly that a few birthdays are coming up and I want to finish this semester. I doubt this will happen as I'm going to take measures to make sure I succeed, but I'm worried something outside of my control will go wrong, I end up getting "saved," and then I miss some critical classes that could help me pass the class. Finals are coming up and worth 30% of my grade... I want to be there during the reviews just in case. It could be the difference between passing and flunking.

I also think my dad might have picked up on something. He keeps asking me if I'm okay. I've asked him why and he says he's "just asking."

 

[worldexploder]

All the matter that exists today has existed for 13.8 billion years from the moment of the Big Bang. Since matter cannot be created or destroyed, all the particles that make up our physical bodies are as old as the universe itself.

 

[Pineapplecrown]

All the matter that exists today has existed for 13.8 billion years from the moment of the Big Bang. Since matter cannot be created or destroyed, all the particles that make up our physical bodies are as old as the universe itself.

Wooah buzzy

 

[worldexploder]

 

[lost illusions]

Mile marker 29 clear calm
Mile marker 30 wet 10mph wind
Mile marker 31 3 inches of snow and ice 50mph wind blizzard conditions
Mile marker 32 clear 10mph wind

Home sweet home

 

[Nofaith]

I never realised just how much normies like to talk.

 

[lost illusions]

I never realised just how much normies like to talk.

Hey lol not me

 

[Eren]

Fuck, I hate myself, I feel really alone.

 

[BurningLights]

All the matter that exists today has existed for 13.8 billion years from the moment of the Big Bang. Since matter cannot be created or destroyed, all the particles that make up our physical bodies are as old as the universe itself.

So really we should not fear death, we are the universe, and no matter what, we will always be the universe. Death is just a different state of being.

 

[worldexploder]

So really we should not fear death, we are the universe, and no matter what, we will always be the universe. Death is just a different state of being.

Yes exactly. Everything is apart of the universe. At least in death we will no longer be sentient matter. No troubles, no suffering, no consciousness. Just like the billions of years before we were born.

 

[BurningLights]

Yes exactly. Everything is apart of the universe. At least in death we will no longer be sentient matter. No troubles, no suffering, no consciousness. Just like the billions of years before we were born.

Its the dream isn't it? To 'be' but not to suffer.

 

[Xerxes]

Sometimes I feel like I need a suicide coach to urge me to do it. I almost felt like creating a livestream and let every b-tard in 4chan tell me to do it, but then if no one looks or smiles at me as I make my way to the top of the bridge, then that just confirms my feeling that I'm doing the right thing.

 

[Johnnythefox]

All the matter that exists today has existed for 13.8 billion years from the moment of the Big Bang. Since matter cannot be created or destroyed, all the particles that make up our physical bodies are as old as the universe itself.

We are all made of star stuff, I can remember watching Carl Sagan when I was younger. He says it best..

 

[worldexploder]

Sometimes I feel like I need a suicide coach to urge me to do it. I almost felt like creating a livestream and let every b-tard in 4chan tell me to do it, but then if no one looks or smiles at me as I make my way to the top of the bridge, then that just confirms my feeling that I'm doing the right thing.

I'd take a death coach over a life coach any day!

 

[Roulette]

I can't do this anymore, I really want to grab the bedsheet and partially hang myself from my wardrobe

There are so many things eating me up, wish I could just get over my problems and move on

 

[lv-gras]

wishing to die and to be dead

 

[blueming]

wishing to die and to be dead

Me too

 

[Trashcan]

I want to ctb tonight but I must hold on until winter break.