A

all_is_vanity

New Member
Jan 9, 2023
4
It's times like this that I truly do believe in an evil god. There is no way this universe and life are random, you'd be dead if it were. No loving god exists. But an evil one is very real
 
  • Like
Reactions: onleana
H

heLLishLandscape

By a Thread
Mar 31, 2023
24
i'm sorry you're experiencing this, it must be very difficult. i know this may seem far fetched as well, but have you considered writing up your own DNR? just a small note stating that you're of sound mind and body and do not wish to be resuscitated if found, with your signature on it.
 
  • Informative
  • Like
Reactions: vaguebluur and Huntfish34
ExistHarm

ExistHarm

suffering
Mar 12, 2023
216
It was like falling into a peaceful sleep no discomfort whatsoever
Back in November last year I finally decided to end it all with a overkill ctb cocktail, I used GBL (liquid date rape) Xanax and alcohol. I can confirm the death was extremely peaceful and I had a double cardiac arrest and flatlined the chance of surviving that is less than 0.1% I was defibrillated several times and was d.o.a at hospital. 60 ml of GBL was drank with a large cup of pink gin, Xanax and domperidone had already been taken, last memory is laughing with a spliff in my mouth then waking up in resus 12 hours later. Currently homeless having a complete breakdown waiting till I get paid to do the same again...sorry for venting
this is extremely reassuring. my biggest fear is a painful and prolonged death. i have a speedball of quaalude, sedative, synth opioid, benzo, and SN, and hopefully i will just fade away too
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Huntfish34
ChildrensITV

ChildrensITV

Arcanist
Mar 14, 2023
455
Im sorry for you.. I know a way to fix the doctors resuscitating thing if i were found. But i wont state it here, unless you pm, or you just figure it out on your own. Can actually fix this on medicle records.
Smear shit in your mouth and on your chest?

Got it.
 
  • Wow
Reactions: User00
L

LittleJem

Visionary
Jul 3, 2019
2,617
@vagueblur thank you for sharing your method. I think I just found a source of it, which is both scary and a relief. Would you mind PM-ing me your source so I can cross reference (or just use your source if it's reliable). I have a method already in my cupboard, but this one sounds much better.
 
vaguebluur

vaguebluur

Overdose king 👑
Apr 3, 2023
128
Cold turkey off my valium morphine and mirtazepine feel like death, at least it's warm today
IMG 20230404 131816 HDR
 
  • Like
Reactions: thelookingontheway
B

Brave_it_Shiru

I am not "safe" babe
Mar 6, 2023
107
Back in November last year I finally decided to end it all with a overkill ctb cocktail, I used GBL (liquid date rape) Xanax and alcohol. I can confirm the death was extremely peaceful and I had a double cardiac arrest and flatlined the chance of surviving that is less than 0.1% I was defibrillated several times and was d.o.a at hospital. 60 ml of GBL was drank with a large cup of pink gin, Xanax and domperidone had already been taken, last memory is laughing with a spliff in my mouth then waking up in resus 12 hours later. Currently homeless having a complete breakdown waiting till I get paid to do the same again...sorry for venting
Oh noooo...

Did a even a small part of you think you were in the afterlife?
i'm sorry you're experiencing this, it must be very difficult. i know this may seem far fetched as well, but have you considered writing up your own DNR? just a small note stating that you're of sound mind and body and do not wish to be resuscitated if found, with your signature on it.
I don't thhik this exists in this country. I can imagine it being found and being used as a reason to get me into a psych ward. 😪
 
Last edited:
vaguebluur

vaguebluur

Overdose king 👑
Apr 3, 2023
128
i'm sorry you're experiencing this, it must be very difficult. i know this may seem far fetched as well, but have you considered writing up your own DNR? just a small note stating that you're of sound mind and body and do not wish to be resuscitated if found, with your signature on it.
I will definitely be doing that this time though with my history I doubt they would take it into account but I will be in the woods far from people and I'll be taking enough to kill around 10 people with ease
 
  • Like
Reactions: samishii
Kraus

Kraus

New Member
Feb 23, 2023
4
I don't understand what's wrong with society, always wanting to keep other people alive for no apparent reason, they usually say "wait everything will get better" my uncle waited 40 years for things to get better, my family has a high history of depression and I maintain that, everyone the days I hope to sleep and never wake up but that doesn't happen, I hope you get better (even if my words don't change your situation)
The best thing that could happen is a meteor crashing to earth
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: imlookingforward, Rogue Proxy, vaguebluur and 1 other person
Proper Overdoser

Proper Overdoser

Drug Addict
Mar 30, 2023
67
Back in November last year I finally decided to end it all with a overkill ctb cocktail, I used GBL (liquid date rape) Xanax and alcohol. I can confirm the death was extremely peaceful and I had a double cardiac arrest and flatlined the chance of surviving that is less than 0.1% I was defibrillated several times and was d.o.a at hospital. 60 ml of GBL was drank with a large cup of pink gin, Xanax and domperidone had already been taken, last memory is laughing with a spliff in my mouth then waking up in resus 12 hours later. Currently homeless having a complete breakdown waiting till I get paid to do the same again...sorry for venting
I can tell you that the hospital is the only reason you're alive, since GBL/GHB is lethal in doses 'close' to rec doses. You don't even need Tor to get RC benzos that are stronger than Xanax though, and I would add something that acts as a Barbiturate so you have 3 different mechanisms at work, since alcohol mimics Xanax at the GABAa receptor, barbs do it a little differently, same receptor. Like Carisoprodol, Phenprobamate, Clomethiazole, etc. All can be bought online easily and although Carisoprodol is prescription only, some sites and several online indian pharmacies ship it just fine, in "small" amounts.

But yeah your cocktail was definitely lethal, you just weren't isolated. I'm sorry it ended that way.
I got it covered Ty. I only survived due to a random welfare check and they were trained in CPR which is all a bit spooky. This time Xanax, bromazolam 140ml of GBL and more are on the cards I have no current tolerance to GBL and can also source phenobarbital so when I get paid 1100 in a month I'm going all in x
That's def enough, the phenobarbital will help a lot too since that's 3 different mechanisms doing their work. Good luck mate, hope things go well for you.
 
  • Like
Reactions: vaguebluur
vaguebluur

vaguebluur

Overdose king 👑
Apr 3, 2023
128
I can tell you that the hospital is the only reason you're alive, since GBL/GHB is lethal in doses 'close' to rec doses. You don't even need Tor to get RC benzos that are stronger than Xanax though, and I would add something that acts as a Barbiturate so you have 3 different mechanisms at work, since alcohol mimics Xanax at the GABAa receptor, barbs do it a little differently, same receptor. Like Carisoprodol, Phenprobamate, Clomethiazole, etc. All can be bought online easily and although Carisoprodol is prescription only, some sites and several online indian pharmacies ship it just fine, in "small" amounts.

But yeah your cocktail was definitely lethal, you just weren't isolated. I'm sorry it ended that way.

That's def enough, the phenobarbital will help a lot too since that's 3 different mechanisms doing their work. Good luck mate, hope things go well for you.
Safe bro
GBL is Is a strong gaba antagonist too, I know my methods a bit overkill but better safe than sorry I guess
 
SilentSadness

SilentSadness

The rain pours eternally.
Feb 28, 2023
1,125
It's really terrible of the doctors to bring you back to life after trying to exit twice, and completely unsurprising that they have done nothing to help you. We really live in such a selfish and unlikable world. I hope you can find a way out of your messy situation.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Rogue Proxy
Proper Overdoser

Proper Overdoser

Drug Addict
Mar 30, 2023
67
Safe bro
GBL is Is a strong gaba antagonist too, I know my methods a bit overkill but better safe than sorry I guess
Agonist** and actually GBL acts on a specific GHB receptor which is similar to GABA in its functions, but it is different, and 10x deadlier when activated, lethal doses of that aren't far off from recreational doses, kinda like Nembutal.

Your method is def overkill but better safe than sorry with this, and be isolated if you don't want another injury. But yeah if you activate your GHB receptor, and then the GABA receptors with benzos and a barbiturate which act a little differently from eachother, that will shut down so many parts of your brain. I mean they say 10mL of GHB can kill some folks. Just make sure to mix the GBL with something not acidic since it is so corrosive, to avoid any pain before the sedation hits.

I think GHB even affects GABAb in higher doses, so you would activate GABAa (in two different ways), GABAb, and the GHB receptor. Def a sleepy death.
 
cloverhiding

cloverhiding

Clover
Apr 2, 2023
10
Ive flat lined back when I was 14 from an overdose that should have killed me , I was "medically dead" , just know that you have support from me and a lot of ppl here. And remember to be kind to yourself through your journey, okay?
 
vaguebluur

vaguebluur

Overdose king 👑
Apr 3, 2023
128
Agonist** and actually GBL acts on a specific GHB receptor which is similar to GABA in its functions, but it is different, and 10x deadlier when activated, lethal doses of that aren't far off from recreational doses, kinda like Nembutal.

Your method is def overkill but better safe than sorry with this, and be isolated if you don't want another injury. But yeah if you activate your GHB receptor, and then the GABA receptors with benzos and a barbiturate which act a little differently from eachother, that will shut down so many parts of your brain. I mean they say 10mL of GHB can kill some folks. Just make sure to mix the GBL with something not acidic since it is so corrosive, to avoid any pain before the sedation hits.

I think GHB even affects GABAb in higher doses, so you would activate GABAa (in two different ways), GABAb, and the GHB receptor. Def a sleepy death.
Safe for the info bro, imagine last time I drank half the GBL neat! Literally I was waiting for the GBL to produce some undesired effects but my last memory is laughing at YouTube then bang it's 12 hours later and I'm in resus. Mad tiing
 
Proper Overdoser

Proper Overdoser

Drug Addict
Mar 30, 2023
67
Safe for the info bro, imagine last time I drank half the GBL neat! Literally I was waiting for the GBL to produce some undesired effects but my last memory is laughing at YouTube then bang it's 12 hours later and I'm in resus. Mad tiing
Yeah and if you can't score GBL, I know a vendor with 1,4 BDO in the USA, which is stronger than GBL, also legal, and imo feels closer to GHB. But yeah an OD from GHB, specially mixed with other sedatives is extremely lethal and peaceful, you just nod off and fall asleep. GHB kills some smaller folk with only 10mL, so imagine mixing with benzos and alcohol. Once you are ready to CTB, feel free to let me know your supplies, I studied pharmacology and worked in a pharmacy, while also being an addict that has tried almost every RC and drug out there since I was 16.
 
mypersonalhell

mypersonalhell

Member
Mar 15, 2023
38
Maybe a weird question but what did they tell you once you were resurrected in the hospital?

Did they offer you any (government or social services) assistance?
 
  • Like
Reactions: vaguebluur
vaguebluur

vaguebluur

Overdose king 👑
Apr 3, 2023
128
They actually didn't tell me I had died I was fucked off the G for hours and couldn't speak the sobered up abruptly and discharged my self.
Yeah and if you can't score GBL, I know a vendor with 1,4 BDO in the USA, which is stronger than GBL, also legal, and imo feels closer to GHB. But yeah an OD from GHB, specially mixed with other sedatives is extremely lethal and peaceful, you just nod off and fall asleep. GHB kills some smaller folk with only 10mL, so imagine mixing with benzos and alcohol. Once you are ready to CTB, feel free to let me know your supplies, I studied pharmacology and worked in a pharmacy, while also being an addict that has tried almost every RC and drug out there since I was 16.
BDO is so dirty but it will do the job, not stronger than GBL imo and feels a lot more dirty. 1ml of GBL= 3ml of ghb and the GBL I drank was fatal ten times over the benzos were more for anxiety and fading off peacefully.
They actually didn't tell me I had died I was fucked off the G for hours and couldn't speak the sobered up abruptly and discharged my self.

BDO is so dirty but it will do the job, not stronger than GBL imo and feels a lot more dirty. 1ml of GBL= 3ml of ghb and the GBL I drank was fatal ten times over the benzos were more for anxiety and fading off peacefully.
I would always recommend benzos for any serious o.d even if they play no part in the fatality.
They actually didn't tell me I had died I was fucked off the G for hours and couldn't speak the sobered up abruptly and discharged my self.

BDO is so dirty but it will do the job, not stronger than GBL imo and feels a lot more dirty. 1ml of GBL= 3ml of ghb and the GBL I drank was fatal ten times over the benzos were more for anxiety and fading off peacefully.
I would always recommend benzos for any serious o.d even if they play no part in the fatality.
 
Last edited:
B

bigdog

Arcanist
Jul 12, 2020
434
How old are you?
And yeah I want to add it is kinda pathetic that they save you and immediately after that you are homeless. Weird society
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: It'sMyLife and lukas19
B

bigdog

Arcanist
Jul 12, 2020
434
I don't understand what's wrong with society, always wanting to keep other people alive for no apparent reason, they usually say "wait everything will get better" my uncle waited 40 years for things to get better, my family has a high history of depression and I maintain that, everyone the days I hope to sleep and never wake up but that doesn't happen, I hope you get better (even if my words don't change your situation)
The best thing that could happen is a meteor crashing to earth
I mean there are times when it really can get better there are people who can't. It is all about predicting the future. But the psychologists tend to always reassure that every situation can get better and I personally think it's not entirely true