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Alltheywanted

Alltheywanted

I'll just lay here and die
Mar 6, 2023
215
Confused, I don't even know what I want. I always wished for love but atp I think I gave up. It makes me feel empty and sad.
 
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Reactions: grungy自殺
vapid

vapid

screaming
Apr 2, 2024
4
absolutely horrible. the worst i have felt in a long time. and not even from a depression standpoint, just in general. i just feel like an idiot and like a bitch. i just got really mad and stormed out of the room cursing at my mom and brother because of an uno game and i am really embarrassed. i wish that i wasn't the way i am and i feel crazy desperate for something, anything, to make it go away. i am fucked up in some really big ways but pretty much all the problems in my life are my own fault.

i guess the main thing i'm feeling is an overwhelming amount of self hatred.
 
W

wishicouldctb

Member
Apr 15, 2024
18
I feel furious. I'm mad at myself because all I do is screw everything up. I'm mad at the world because I don't want to be in it. I feel hopeless because I can't leave but I can't go on living like this. I feel literally nothing put pain. I feel no happiness. Every time I laugh or smile I just think about how there's a million things wrong with me and my life and how any brief moment feigning happiness is just me lying to myself and the world. I feel like every breathe is hurting me more and more. I feel like I am nothing. I can't even describe the hurt I feel and the pain I'm in. Every night I pray to anyone listening to please just kill me. I have prayed like this numerous night for over a decade and my prayers are never answered. My life feels like a sick joke and I'm the punchline.
 
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Reactions: alltoomuch2
thealteredmind

thealteredmind

Member
Apr 2, 2024
90
one of my benzo symptoms is annoying me. apart from that... I just feel like always... meh, empty, bored, hollow, in a life without any color.
depressed.
 
aWeeBitTired

aWeeBitTired

I don't know anything.
Feb 25, 2024
43
I want to kill myself, there is no escape from the longevity and innateness of suffering
 
RegretedFeeling

RegretedFeeling

Student
Mar 21, 2021
103
I sat inside a stared at a wall all day, I kinda want to buy a rope and go for a hike, just wing it!
I sat inside a stared at a wall all day, I kinda want to buy a rope and go for a hike, just wing it!
I've had multiple people in my family do it. I should be able to also,
 
grungy自殺

grungy自殺

Radio Friendly Unit Shifter
Jan 9, 2024
56
detached and confused

No idea what i'm doing anymore...
Confused, I don't even know what I want. I always wished for love but atp I think I gave up. It makes me feel empty and sad.
I feel that


Also i like your pinkerton pfp :smiling:
 
Luckiest7

Luckiest7

We all crash and burn :(
Oct 3, 2023
5
Even if they very clearly don't want me to die. Theyre annoyed with me, i just know it
 
homesoon.

homesoon.

i̶t̶'̶s̶ ̶n̶i̶c̶e̶ ̶t̶o̶ ̶b̶e̶ ̶b̶a̶c̶k̶.̶
Apr 15, 2024
43
I wish I didn't work tomorrow so I could be drunk enough to self-harm and build up the courage to cbt w/o guilt. At least in the moment.
 
watchdog

watchdog

watch-dog
Mar 24, 2023
74
I feel disgusting and ashamed. I'm also sad.
 
A

alltoomuch2

Member
Feb 10, 2024
59
empty, like crying, wary of the world, accepting that it is everyone except mental health workers against me. Like there is something wrong with me that makes everyone want to hurt me and take advantage. Going through the motions but I don't know why. Lost. That everyone wants me to be different and don't like the real me. Hurt, angry, lost, sad, scared, anxious, dying inside, worthless, pointless, can't see a future.
I feel furious. I'm mad at myself because all I do is screw everything up. I'm mad at the world because I don't want to be in it. I feel hopeless because I can't leave but I can't go on living like this. I feel literally nothing put pain. I feel no happiness. Every time I laugh or smile I just think about how there's a million things wrong with me and my life and how any brief moment feigning happiness is just me lying to myself and the world. I feel like every breathe is hurting me more and more. I feel like I am nothing. I can't even describe the hurt I feel and the pain I'm in. Every night I pray to anyone listening to please just kill me. I have prayed like this numerous night for over a decade and my prayers are never answered. My life feels like a sick joke and I'm the punchline.
This^^^^^^
 
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Reactions: Catch-22
Catch-22

Catch-22

Time waits for no one...
Aug 19, 2019
136
Very sick like I'm dying.. unfortunately I'm not at this moment it just feels like it. Decades of physical and mental torture
 
lawlietsph

lawlietsph

can we be done here
May 6, 2023
34
I am sick. My head and my throat hurts and I am sooooooooo tired. You know, the kind of tiredness that cannot be cured by sleep. I feel incredibly scared and anxious because of my financial situation.
I am 28 years old, achieved NOTHING, wasted my youth to mental illness. I love to be alone, but now I just feel absolutely isolated and lonely. I want to kill my body - this body, that always letting me down. I am disgusted about my face. I am fat and I cannot stop eating chocolate, as it has became like a drug to me. Tired, tired, so so so tired. Not a single day without feeling absolutely disgusting and wanting to die. The last time I didn't wanted to die was when I was 11 or something.
I really wish to get some kind of sickness and just let me sleep and die alone and just leave me to rot in the silence.
 
Myforevercharlie

Myforevercharlie

Global Mod
Feb 13, 2020
2,550
Like the scare crow from the Wizard of Oz. The fat version
 
W

wilsonio

Member
Jun 15, 2022
8
[BGCOLOR=rgba(0, 0, 0, 0)]A ton of anxiety. Lonely, depressed. I feel like there's just not really a point of going on anymore. [/BGCOLOR]
 
melancholymallory03

melancholymallory03

Do cats live nine lives ? Or do humans ⏰
Feb 20, 2024
313
Empty and heartbroken 💔 pathetic and disgusting, sad , desperate, piece of shit human being ,wanna disappear, hopeful about ctb
 
M

mehdone

Mortician
Oct 10, 2023
221
Sad.
A weird mix of determination, yet numb and ready to give up if I didn't have to pull the trigger.
Tired, but I don't want to die anymore- but I have wanted to for so long, that is my default- self destruction, death, suicide- It is hard to be anything else when that is all I've known.
Hope can be so fleeting.
But lately, so can my desire for death. That's new to me.
Confused.
Exhausted.
Hopeful.
Dread.
I'm a bit all mixed up, and have been for a while now.

I wish life could just be fucking easy.
 
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Reactions: uncat_
wastingpotential

wastingpotential

drowning, always.
Feb 8, 2023
132
so overwhelmed even though i'm someone who never leaves my room and can't confront anything no matter how much they try. this anxiety appears in my chest at night that yells im not doing enough or im not being productive and everything i do is a waste of time but i dont know exactly what to fucking do.

i'm tired and i can't remember the last time I properly slept and i miss so many things and people that i know wouldn't even turn their heads if they heard i'm finally dead, because they get to move on in life and nothing affected them and life didn't bruise them as it did me. they hurt me so much and i still miss them. i miss so many things and it doesn't make sense for me to when all i think about is how i shouldn't even be alive anymore. whats the point at all
 
4am

4am

there’s nothing for you (it/its)
Dec 14, 2023
1,384
there's already a thread with the exact same title in offtopic section. why duplicate it? maybe fc is unironically right about this forum
 
uncat_

uncat_

aspiring corpse
Nov 3, 2023
99
Calm but almost too calm, and also not calm at all. Almost as if I've given up? Which I have. I've been so suicidal these past few weeks, more intense than I've ever felt before. More willing to go through with something and succeed. But I can't. I'm angry and sad, but I have to hide those emotions from myself not to do anything stupid.

I have too many people who love me and too many people who want me to stay. The last thing I want to do is hurt those people. I'm trying to fill my days with little things that'll make me enjoy life a little bit more, but that means I'm ignoring my schoolwork.

I'm just so overwhelmed with emotions that I have to hide. I don't want to fucking do this anymore, but I have to.

Everything I do is for other people. Why can't they accept that I just want peace? Peace from myself.
 
M

mehdone

Mortician
Oct 10, 2023
221
Calm but almost too calm, and also not calm at all. Almost as if I've given up? Which I have. I've been so suicidal these past few weeks, more intense than I've ever felt before. More willing to go through with something and succeed. But I can't. I'm angry and sad, but I have to hide those emotions from myself not to do anything stupid.

I have too many people who love me and too many people who want me to stay. The last thing I want to do is hurt those people. I'm trying to fill my days with little things that'll make me enjoy life a little bit more, but that means I'm ignoring my schoolwork.

I'm just so overwhelmed with emotions that I have to hide. I don't want to fucking do this anymore, but I have to.

Everything I do is for other people. Why can't they accept that I just want peace? Peace from myself.
I'm familiar with that calm. It is dangerous.
 
V

Vault Dweller

New Member
Apr 20, 2024
1
I'm experiencing a strong urge to quit. My life has felt like a constant struggle from the beginning, and I can't seem to get a break. Sometimes I wonder if the universe is testing me or if it's just against me.
 

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