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raiseurweapon

raiseurweapon

Member
Feb 22, 2023
24
ive known the boy ive been with since i was 18, im almost 21 now. but i found out he was cheating on me our entire relationship with someone he's known since he was 15. i feel so defeated especially because ive already been severely depressed. im angry because all i asked for was honesty when i was suspicious. now he is with the girl he was messing with since we been together. i wanted to only be with one person my entire life and it feels like he ripped it away from me. why did he beg for me to stay with him days prior.. he left me when my family left town and i had to handle the downfall alone. he knew ive harmed myself and tried to take my life in the past. the girl he was messing with messaged me and i found out he lied to me about everything ( yet this is the girl that stayed with him after finding out) why do i care if they work out or not? how could they after this? anyways, i didnt even wanna love him in the first place because i was scared of exactly this. he really was the only one in my eyes. i never even thought of anyone else for a split second. he promised me he wouldnt leave me like this but he did. i already wanted to die but this makes it sooooo much harder to keep going. i havent looked at his shit because now that girl is posted everywhere. he was my bestfriend. i feel like this changed me as a person. how could he lie to me for that long?.. why wasnt i good enough? him literally choosing another girl infront of me makes me wanna peel my skin off with a razor. just want to know how u can fuck up someone like this. i didnt talk about my mental health around him and he told me i made him happy. he acted like i was perfect and even said "i choose you, nobody else" my heart is heavy, if i dont die i dont want this to fucking mentally ruin me. i dont know how i could ever trust someeone again. i cant eat or sleep since i found everything out. the universe wants me to suffer lol.
 
The Schizoid

The Schizoid

Specialist
Oct 24, 2023
308
You unfortunately got played by a shitty person. Nothing you can do but move. Seek professional help if needed, get to work getting over this asap to avoid it sucking up more of your life.

You weren't cheated on because of anything to do with you. You were mistreat.

Please don't let this impact your self esteem.
 
raiseurweapon

raiseurweapon

Member
Feb 22, 2023
24
You unfortunately got played by a shitty person. Nothing you can do but move. Seek professional help if needed, get to work getting over this asap to avoid it sucking up more of your life.

You weren't cheated on because of anything to do with you. You were mistreat.

Please don't let this impact your self esteem.
yeah im really trying my hardest. just dont know how people can carry so much evil in their hearts. hoping to god he will never try to come back to me because im an idiot over him.
 
raiseurweapon

raiseurweapon

Member
Feb 22, 2023
24
Why do people have to do this, to be that fucking selfish and cheat on someone, what about all that honesty and commitment, conveniently thrown out the window.

I'm sorry about this op but it's just as @The Schizoid said
yeah. im 20 and i avoided relationships at all cost til him. i feel awful waiting for so long and wasting my time on someone who didnt deserve it. i HATE hookup culture and ive been shunned by my friends just for not wanting to meet new men in highshool. im crushedddd
 
Goku Black

Goku Black

Global Mod
Jun 5, 2023
3,093
i feel awful waiting for so long and wasting my time on someone who didnt deserve it.
I'd feel awful to, because you waited a long time for it, you were patient with yourself throughout and thought you found the right person, unfortunately it didn't work out this time and then he went ahead and did THAT.

i HATE hookup culture and ive been shunned by my friends just for not wanting to meet new men in highshool. im crushedddd
I think your friends are absolutely wrong for this, especially going far as to shun you for not following what they wanted to do and for what it's worth, I don't like hook-up culture either hence why I've stayed well away from it because it just didn't make sense or matter to me, and if that's how you feel then screw anyone else who thinks otherwise. I hope you get whatever help you can to get over betrayed like this, I've been there, even with friends abandoning me when I thought they wouldn't.
 
raiseurweapon

raiseurweapon

Member
Feb 22, 2023
24
I'd feel awful to, because you waited a long time for it, you were patient with yourself throughout and thought you found the right person, unfortunately it didn't work out this time and then he went ahead and did THAT.


I think your friends are absolutely wrong for this, especially going far as to shun you for not following what they wanted to do and for what it's worth, I don't like hook-up culture either hence why I've stayed well away from it because it just didn't make sense or matter to me, and if that's how you feel then screw anyone else who thinks otherwise. I hope you get whatever help you can to get over betrayed like this, I've been there, even with friends abandoning me when I thought they wouldn't.
thank you, its just so hard to accept after everything he looked me in my face and told me he loved another girl.. after everything, spending everyday and night together. i just feel so sick and i cant stop thinking about it
 
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Goku Black

Goku Black

Global Mod
Jun 5, 2023
3,093
thank you, its just so hard to accept after everything he looked me in my face and told me he loved another girl.. after everything, spending everyday and night together. i just feel so sick and i cant stop thinking about it
It'll take a while but I hope in time, you'll find peace within yourself and have the strength to move past this because I know you can. It's going to be difficult and emotionally challenging but you can do it.
 
raiseurweapon

raiseurweapon

Member
Feb 22, 2023
24
It'll take a while but I hope in time, you'll find peace within yourself and have the strength to move past this because I know you can. It's going to be difficult and emotionally challenging but you can do it.
means the world to me. thank you so much.
 
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Angst Filled Fuck Up

Angst Filled Fuck Up

Visionary
Sep 9, 2018
2,630
I'm sorry to read this. I have been deeply deceived by most women I have been with. It's always super painful to me because I don't have a life outside of my partner really. It feels so dumb and pointless to keep going through this and it never seems to get any easier.

I am always trying to escape and find someone new because I keep going through the same cycles and being screwed over.

Just know you are not alone and it doesn't say anything about who you are.

Time does heal wounds but sometimes it takes a long time before you're fully over it.

Wishing you luck and strength.
 
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raiseurweapon

raiseurweapon

Member
Feb 22, 2023
24
I'm sorry to read this. I have been deeply deceived by most women I have been with. It's always super painful to me because I don't have a life outside of my partner really. It feels so dumb and pointless to keep going through this and it never seems to get any easier.

I am always trying to escape and find someone new because I keep going through the same cycles and being screwed over.

Just know you are not alone and it doesn't say anything about who you are.

Time does heal wounds but sometimes it takes a long time before you're fully over it.

Wishing you luck and strength.
same here, i put my all into my relationship. spent all my time and money on making things good. i literally feel like the ugliest girl in the world because he looked me in my face and chose a blonde girl!! i really trusted him so this is crazy devastating and i have NO friends because they cut me all off for spending all of my time with him before he cheated on me. have to deal with this all on my own and it's just messing with me. thank you so much for ur kind words. it makes me feel less alone. i know there is genuine people out in the world but i just don't think i attract them. lol.
 
Angst Filled Fuck Up

Angst Filled Fuck Up

Visionary
Sep 9, 2018
2,630
same here, i put my all into my relationship. spent all my time and money on making things good. i literally feel like the ugliest girl in the world because he looked me in my face and chose a blonde girl!! i really trusted him so this is crazy devastating and i have NO friends because they cut me all off for spending all of my time with him before he cheated on me. have to deal with this all on my own and it's just messing with me. thank you so much for ur kind words. it makes me feel less alone. i know there is genuine people out in the world but i just don't think i attract them. lol.

It's really difficult if you're wired for a proper relationship but all you get is second-rate treatment and non-commitment.

Seems that most people now are geared towards "spreading the risk" so they have a whole bunch of others they kind of fraternize with to varying degrees. That's a foreign concept to me, because I'm pretty high effort towards my one person. The problem with that is it can come off needy, and then if it goes wrong you've put all your eggs in one basket. And of course I don't feel confident getting involved with someone who has like multiple dudes on the backburner. But when I express that, I'm the unreasonable one. It's pretty unwinnable.

I suppose the trick is to find someone who is also oriented around something serious, who doesn't feel the need to really spread themselves. Someone who wants something deep and cozy. I truly hope you do manage to find someone who fits the bill for you. Nobody deserves to be cheated on and feel horribly disillusioned as a result.
 
raiseurweapon

raiseurweapon

Member
Feb 22, 2023
24
yeah, it's just upsetting because he made me believe i was the only one for so long. this is so unexpected. he made it seem like he wanted me and only me and it's just crazy this went on for so long and he feels no remorse toward it? how do u not care after years together. i deleted like most of my socials because im so scared he will try to add me on something yet i want him to apologize but nothing would change. everything he said was a lie and i haven't even cried since i found out everything. i'm just shocked and numb. i feel disgusting and i wish i didn't because i know i did everything i could for him, i just feel so lost. so much time wasted. i don't even care about the money i spent but the way he lied for so long.. when i asked over and over if there was someone else and he made me feel crazy and wouldn't talk to me over it. i don't want to hate him and have resent but i genuinely am so confused on my emotions towards him.
 
Dot

Dot

Globl mod - Info abt typng styl on prfle.
Sep 26, 2021
2,379
ive known the boy ive been with since i was 18, im almost 21 now. but i found out he was cheating on me our entire relationship with someone he's known since he was 15. i feel so defeated especially because ive already been severely depressed. im angry because all i asked for was honesty when i was suspicious. now he is with the girl he was messing with since we been together. i wanted to only be with one person my entire life and it feels like he ripped it away from me. why did he beg for me to stay with him days prior.. he left me when my family left town and i had to handle the downfall alone. he knew ive harmed myself and tried to take my life in the past. the girl he was messing with messaged me and i found out he lied to me about everything ( yet this is the girl that stayed with him after finding out) why do i care if they work out or not? how could they after this? anyways, i didnt even wanna love him in the first place because i was scared of exactly this. he really was the only one in my eyes. i never even thought of anyone else for a split second. he promised me he wouldnt leave me like this but he did. i already wanted to die but this makes it sooooo much harder to keep going. i havent looked at his shit because now that girl is posted everywhere. he was my bestfriend. i feel like this changed me as a person. how could he lie to me for that long?.. why wasnt i good enough? him literally choosing another girl infront of me makes me wanna peel my skin off with a razor. just want to know how u can fuck up someone like this. i didnt talk about my mental health around him and he told me i made him happy. he acted like i was perfect and even said "i choose you, nobody else" my heart is heavy, if i dont die i dont want this to fucking mentally ruin me. i dont know how i could ever trust someeone again. i cant eat or sleep since i found everything out. the universe wants me to suffer lol.

Jst knw tht nobdy wh/ thnks tht u r wrth ths treatmnt dserves ur deth

'Th/ bst revnge = t/ liv well'

Am srry fr th/ pain tht u r goin thru & = goin2 b v v raw fr whle

Pls lk out fr urslf & knw tht u r bettr awy frm a persn lke tht
 
Angst Filled Fuck Up

Angst Filled Fuck Up

Visionary
Sep 9, 2018
2,630
yeah, it's just upsetting because he made me believe i was the only one for so long. this is so unexpected. he made it seem like he wanted me and only me and it's just crazy this went on for so long and he feels no remorse toward it? how do u not care after years together. i deleted like most of my socials because im so scared he will try to add me on something yet i want him to apologize but nothing would change. everything he said was a lie and i haven't even cried since i found out everything. i'm just shocked and numb. i feel disgusting and i wish i didn't because i know i did everything i could for him, i just feel so lost. so much time wasted. i don't even care about the money i spent but the way he lied for so long.. when i asked over and over if there was someone else and he made me feel crazy and wouldn't talk to me over it. i don't want to hate him and have resent but i genuinely am so confused on my emotions towards him.

You want them to care but worry that they just don't. You know you're torn up but feel like it's nothing to them. That's the worst feeling in the world, that whole imbalance of emotion. I suspect it's a case of, until or unless the penny drops for them, you're kind of screwed. It sounds really shitty. But I know for my part I could point out all the crap things this or that person did, I'd have a laundry list, but it made no difference. All they knew is that I was upset and it was triggering to them. So then nothing gets solved.

And yeah totally feel you on the time wasted thing. For me it was being deceived after 3 years and 6 years, in two different relationships. I don't know how people are just supposed to cope and move on. It's all been too much.
 
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raiseurweapon

raiseurweapon

Member
Feb 22, 2023
24
Jst knw tht nobdy wh/ thnks tht u r wrth ths treatmnt dserves ur deth

'Th/ bst revnge = t/ liv well'

Am srry fr th/ pain tht u r goin thru & = goin2 b v v raw fr whle

Pls lk out fr urslf & knw tht u r bettr awy frm a persn lke tht
thank you so much <3 i'm struggling but i'm hoping i can pick myself back up. ur very kind. he used to tell me my life would suck without him and he said it so many times i started to believe it.
 
Dot

Dot

Globl mod - Info abt typng styl on prfle.
Sep 26, 2021
2,379
thank you so much <3 i'm struggling but i'm hoping i can pick myself back up. ur very kind. he used to tell me my life would suck without him and he said it so many times i started to believe it.

Yh & n.e1 wh/ ws carng abt u wld sy tht 'thr lfe wld sck w/o u'

Nt th/ othr wy arnd

Hs wordng snds abusve

H/ = slf-cntred chld & tht othr womn knws tht sh/ hs chosn a cheatr
 
raiseurweapon

raiseurweapon

Member
Feb 22, 2023
24
You want them to care but worry that they just don't. You know you're torn up but feel like it's nothing to them. That's the worst feeling in the world, that whole imbalance of emotion. I suspect it's a case of, until or unless the penny drops for them, you're kind of screwed. It sounds really shitty. But I know for my part I could point out all the crap things this or that person did, I'd have a laundry list, but it made no difference. All they knew is that I was upset and it was triggering to them. So then nothing gets solved.

And yeah totally feel you on the time wasted thing. For me it was being deceived after 3 years and 6 years, in two different relationships. I don't know how people are just supposed to cope and move on. It's all been too much.
i cut him off completely since i found out, but the last message he sent me was "i didn't want you to ruin things between me and her" referring to the girl he was cheating on me with. because the girl added me and im assuming he cared more about her than me. but i did everything for that man. how can he not look back and feel guilty. it's not like i was bad or mean to him. he even called me the sweetest girl in the world and beforehand told me "i didn't wanna lose you so i didn't wanna tell you" im confused. and sad.
Yh & n.e1 wh/ ws carng abt u wld sy tht 'thr lfe wld sck w/o u'

Nt th/ othr wy arnd

Hs wordng snds abusve

H/ = slf-cntred chld & tht othr womn knws tht sh/ hs chosn a cheatr
yeah. just so unfortunate i put my all into him. i was already so mentally unwell this is just kicking me while im down.
 
R

ropearoundatree

Student
Nov 9, 2023
182
It's all a commentary on him. And none on you. That is it, period. There's nothing you could have done, differently with somebody like this. It's likely the harder or better a job you did at treating &/or loving him, the more likely he may have been to deviate. As he didn't feel like you were as special as someone whom he'd maybe had to work a little harder over, or for. Perhaps that is what this other woman represented? Or not. Maybe! Who cares~

Bottom line: You learned something. Better for it to come now, than later. And with potentially even more invested in. Consider yourself lucky or fortunate in this sense. That you got the warning. And discovered all. His character was revealed. Why he did it? I guess he thought, among other things that he could get away with it. But the sooner you can get to the "who gives a f." stage, the better obviously. Apathy (one of).

They can get married, and have ten babies. Or break-up, to morrow! And you won't care one iota, as it now makes no difference to you anymore. For that is about how much he showed you meant to him, with or by his actions. Words can mean or represent one thing. And then the other, another. It is up to you, or any of us in similar, to decide how we want to decipher or determine that amount of weight with which each deserves.
 
Dot

Dot

Globl mod - Info abt typng styl on prfle.
Sep 26, 2021
2,379
i cut him off completely since i found out, but the last message he sent me was "i didn't want you to ruin things between me and her" referring to the girl he was cheating on me with. because the girl added me and im assuming he cared more about her than me. but i did everything for that man. how can he not look back and feel guilty. it's not like i was bad or mean to him.

H/ ws ruinng evrythng - nt u

he even called me the sweetest girl in the world and beforehand told me "i didn't wanna lose you so i didn't wanna tell you" im confused. and sad.

S/ h/ opnly admts h/ wnts bth of u

Ds nt wrk lke tht
 
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raiseurweapon

raiseurweapon

Member
Feb 22, 2023
24
It's all a commentary on him. And none on you. That is it, period. There's nothing you could have done, differently with somebody like this. It's likely the harder or better a job you did at treating &/or loving him, the more likely he may have been to deviate. As he didn't feel like you were as special as someone whom he'd maybe had to work a little harder over, or for. Perhaps that is what this other woman represented? Or not. Maybe! Who cares~

Bottom line: You learned something. Better for it to come now, than later. And with potentially even more invested in. Consider yourself lucky or fortunate in this sense. That you got the warning. And discovered all. His character was revealed. Why he did it? I guess he thought, among other things that he could get away with it. But the sooner you can get to the "who gives a f." stage, the better obviously. Apathy (one of).

They can get married, and have ten babies. Or break-up, to morrow! And you won't care one iota, as it now makes no difference to you anymore. For that is about how much he showed you meant to him, with or by his actions. Words can mean or represent one thing. And then the other, another. It is up to you, or any of us in similar, to decide how we want to decipher or determine that amount of weight with which each deserves.
yeah, i understand and it's just so hard to really see him for who he is. i know eventually it'll get through my head. but it's been eating me alive recently. apart of me knows i can get through this but im scared if he ever tries to talk to me again, ill give in. i just hope i gain more self respect til then
H/ ws ruinng evrythng - nt u



S/ h/ opnly admts h/ wnts bth of u

Ds nt wrk lke tht
yeah, but it was obvious he values her more and didn't wanna lose her over me.
 
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UserHussein

UserHussein

Member
Oct 14, 2023
51
User warned for disrespectful conduct.
At least you've BEEN in a relationship, I'm actually envious of you. I'm 21 and never had a gf.

Meanwhile, you're complaining that your relationship hasn't worked out for you, lucky b****.
 
raiseurweapon

raiseurweapon

Member
Feb 22, 2023
24
At least you've BEEN in a relationship, I'm actually envious of you. I'm 21 and never had a gf.

Meanwhile, you're complaining that your relationship hasn't worked out for you, lucky b****.
he is deployed in japan for the military and we only started getting really serious after he left my state. it wasn't even physical for over a year. id say im grateful for the experience but im really not since it was ALL a lie. i waited so long and saved my virginity for my first love. so im kinda lucky we weren't intimate, because i want to be with only one person my entire life, and that would've been awful for me. it's only so fucked up because he was my bestfriend before everything and he still lied to my face before we even got together. i was just oblivious.
 
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R

ropearoundatree

Student
Nov 9, 2023
182
It's okay @raiseurweapon - for it will take some time for this to sink in. And then progress to the point where you can gradually at first, and then more steadily move towards eventually reaching the stage at which your comfort level is reached And he is then, therefore, in the "rear view." So try not to beat yourself up over that too! :) It's like when I realize I've been wasting my time by getting angry at something which wasn't even worth my energy devotion, or devoted to in the first place, as they weren't worth their salt.

So it's kind of like a double whammy, though, sometimes what happens then - is that - I realize this a little more easily. That the thing with which was such a source of my frustration, really wasn't worth all that much trouble, as the focus has/or had shifted from that thing, to me being mad at myself, over having spent so much time & energy on in the first place. And etc.! ;)
 
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raiseurweapon

raiseurweapon

Member
Feb 22, 2023
24
It's okay @raiseurweapon - for it will take some time for this to sink in. And then progress to the point where you can gradually at first, and then more steadily move towards eventually reaching the stage at which your comfort level is reached And he is then, therefore, in the "rear view." So try not to beat yourself up over that too! :) It's like when I realize I've been wasting my time by getting angry at something which wasn't even worth my energy devotion, or devoted to in the first place, as they weren't worth their salt.

So it's kind of like a double whammy, though, sometimes what happens then - is that - I realize this a little more easily. That the thing with which was such a source of my frustration, really wasn't worth all that much trouble, as the focus has/or had shifted from that thing, to me being mad at myself, over having spent so much time & energy on in the first place. And etc.! ;)
thank you so much. i'm trying to let myself understand it wasn't my fault because i really did everything i could. but i fucked up because he was my source of happiness. we talked constantly so i'm confused on how he had the time to do this. it's so hard to sleep. even right not it's 7am and i cannot even imagine the dreams im gonna have. i'm just trying not to go insane and the only reason im not hysterical is because i know it'll give him a weird ego boost that im crushed over him cheating on me lol.
 
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ropearoundatree

Student
Nov 9, 2023
182
thank you so much. i'm trying to let myself understand it wasn't my fault because i really did everything i could. but i fucked up because he was my source of happiness. we talked constantly so i'm confused on how he had the time to do this. it's so hard to sleep. even right not it's 7am and i cannot even imagine the dreams im gonna have. i'm just trying not to go insane and the only reason im not hysterical is because i know it'll give him a weird ego boost that im crushed over him cheating on me lol.
Did you say he was overseas? That would be one way to make it much easier, "to deceive!" ...I understand that with which you speak. If posting here, or elsewhere is helpful, or even just hanging out & socializing in whatever manner you can. That may help to, if not fill that void, or emptiness with which you feel--then at least to perhaps, provide some kind of 'distraction,' for you. And those, or that - can be oh so essential, at times or moments, of crises, like these. What tends to happen, I have found, and obviously not overnight.

But it goes from the feelings & emotional side of it, or the equation. That end, it sort of shifts over to the more rational & logical, or thinking & reasoning side. And that is the area or place with which many of these heavy powerful forces that are radiating throughout you, your body & head, and all else . . . will become much easier to compartmentalize, and recognize for what they are. And for then, them to sting just a little bit less. Before dropping them altogether, eventually or in the end.

Hopefully, that is what happens. And even if it doesn't reach the very end stages of that final place where you don't give two sh-t's, about him. Then you'll likely get CLOSE ENOUGH. To be able to deal with it, process it, and to move on. And so on...
 
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raiseurweapon

raiseurweapon

Member
Feb 22, 2023
24
Did you say he was overseas? That would be one way to make it much easier, "to deceive!" ...I understand that with which you speak. If posting here, or elsewhere is helpful, or even just hanging out & socializing in whatever manner you can. That may help to, if not fill that void, or emptiness with which you feel--then at least to perhaps, provide some kind of 'distraction,' for you. And those, or that - can be oh so essential, at times or moments, of crises, like these. What tends to happen, I have found, and obviously not overnight.

But it goes from the feelings & emotional side of it, or the equation. That end, it sort of shifts over to the more rational & logical, or thinking & reasoning side. And that is the area or place with which many of these heavy powerful forces that are radiating throughout you, your body & head, and all else . . . will become much easier to compartmentalize, and recognize for what they are. And for then, them to sting just a little bit less. Before dropping them altogether, eventually or in the end.

Hopefully, that is what happens. And even if it doesn't reach the very end stages of that final place where you don't give two sh-t's, about him. Then you'll likely get CLOSE ENOUGH. To be able to deal with it, process it, and to move on. And so on...
yeah. i just thought since when he was in the states and when we were friends and hung out before he left he seemed SO genuine and in love with me. he promised me before he left he wouldn't leave me and still talk to me everyday and even sleep on the phone if i needed it. the person i thought he was, the sweet, king hearted boy that i knew NEVER existed. everything he said was a lie. he even told me he's never been in a relationship before me, he lied. told me he never did stuff with anyone else, he lied. i wouldn't of judged him and he knew that yet still lied to my face. all i can do is think about it til i can't anymore then hope i just think of something else eventually. i really really thought he was the boy i was gonna marry i feel so foolish
 
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B

Buh-bye!

jkfajsd
Jan 10, 2024
115
ive known the boy ive been with since i was 18, im almost 21 now. but i found out he was cheating on me our entire relationship with someone he's known since he was 15. i feel so defeated especially because ive already been severely depressed. im angry because all i asked for was honesty when i was suspicious. now he is with the girl he was messing with since we been together. i wanted to only be with one person my entire life and it feels like he ripped it away from me. why did he beg for me to stay with him days prior.. he left me when my family left town and i had to handle the downfall alone. he knew ive harmed myself and tried to take my life in the past. the girl he was messing with messaged me and i found out he lied to me about everything ( yet this is the girl that stayed with him after finding out) why do i care if they work out or not? how could they after this? anyways, i didnt even wanna love him in the first place because i was scared of exactly this. he really was the only one in my eyes. i never even thought of anyone else for a split second. he promised me he wouldnt leave me like this but he did. i already wanted to die but this makes it sooooo much harder to keep going. i havent looked at his shit because now that girl is posted everywhere. he was my bestfriend. i feel like this changed me as a person. how could he lie to me for that long?.. why wasnt i good enough? him literally choosing another girl infront of me makes me wanna peel my skin off with a razor. just want to know how u can fuck up someone like this. i didnt talk about my mental health around him and he told me i made him happy. he acted like i was perfect and even said "i choose you, nobody else" my heart is heavy, if i dont die i dont want this to fucking mentally ruin me. i dont know how i could ever trust someeone again. i cant eat or sleep since i found everything out. the universe wants me to suffer lol.
it will be alright, take good care of yourself
everyone here is always available if you need to talk. and by available i mean " available ". hold onto yourself <3
 
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raiseurweapon

raiseurweapon

Member
Feb 22, 2023
24
it will be alright, take good care of yourself
everyone here is always available if you need to talk. and by available i mean " available ". hold onto yourself <3
thank you so much <3 ):
 
R

Raichu

An old head on young shoulders
Jan 11, 2024
76
I really am so sorry miss. You did not deserve this. It wasn't your fault. Please talk to your friends and family. Get therapy and just cut that piece of shit off from your life. It's just a phase you were living without him before and you will after.
ive known the boy ive been with since i was 18, im almost 21 now. but i found out he was cheating on me our entire relationship with someone he's known since he was 15. i feel so defeated especially because ive already been severely depressed. im angry because all i asked for was honesty when i was suspicious. now he is with the girl he was messing with since we been together. i wanted to only be with one person my entire life and it feels like he ripped it away from me. why did he beg for me to stay with him days prior.. he left me when my family left town and i had to handle the downfall alone. he knew ive harmed myself and tried to take my life in the past. the girl he was messing with messaged me and i found out he lied to me about everything ( yet this is the girl that stayed with him after finding out) why do i care if they work out or not? how could they after this? anyways, i didnt even wanna love him in the first place because i was scared of exactly this. he really was the only one in my eyes. i never even thought of anyone else for a split second. he promised me he wouldnt leave me like this but he did. i already wanted to die but this makes it sooooo much harder to keep going. i havent looked at his shit because now that girl is posted everywhere. he was my bestfriend. i feel like this changed me as a person. how could he lie to me for that long?.. why wasnt i good enough? him literally choosing another girl infront of me makes me wanna peel my skin off with a razor. just want to know how u can fuck up someone like this. i didnt talk about my mental health around him and he told me i made him happy. he acted like i was perfect and even said "i choose you, nobody else" my heart is heavy, if i dont die i dont want this to fucking mentally ruin me. i dont know how i could ever trust someeone again. i cant eat or sleep since i found everything out. the universe wants me to suffer lol.
 
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