Method going tonight, my plan

[SSGoingInsane]

I relate a lot to your story. I think a lot of us are very lonely and isolated. Man, if I just had a couple good friendships again or a gf I'd be so much better. I've been where you've been, having your mental state muck up things. Burnt a lot of bridges, lost a lot of good people along the way. It's really hard to accept and move past that

Yeah, a few real friends or a loyal gf would be clutch. i also feel like im islolated as hell even tho I have "friends"

 

[janejackson]

Thanks. Me too. 2 hours to toast. And a bit of water or tea? And the pills. 3 hrs to N. I hope ai don't get a case of nerves. I just want to gulp. Hopefully 2-3 gulps. It's a little over 7 ounces.

How much tequila should I try to drink? Afterward.

I vote for tea with the toast. Possibly would help with the nerves a bit.

I'm going to exit within a week or so and even thinking about it makes me nervous; less SI and more "what if I fail"?

Only one shot of tequila to drown out the bitter taste. Alcohol potentiates N but too much and the combination can cause vomiting.

 

[SSGoingInsane]

I vote for tea with the toast. Possibly would help with the nerves a bit.

I'm going to exit within a week or so and even thinking about it makes me nervous; less SI and more "what if I fail"?

Only one shot of tequila to drown out the bitter taste. Alcohol potentiates N but too much and the combination can cause vomiting.

are you also going to be doing the SN method?

 

[Eucalyptus72]

I vote for tea with the toast. Possibly would help with the nerves a bit.

I'm going to exit within a week or so and even thinking about it makes me nervous; less SI and more "what if I fail"?

Only one shot of tequila to drown out the bitter taste. Alcohol potentiates N but too much and the combination can cause vomiting.

Dumb question but how much is one shot? I don't have a shot glass. Just a regular glass. I could measure the amount I use for margaritas which I think is one ounce.

are you also going to be doing the SN method?

N.

 

[janejackson]

Dumb question but how much is one shot? I don't have a shot glass. Just a regular glass. I could measure the amount I use for margaritas which I think is one ounce.

N.

A shot is 1.5 ounces but 1 is probably fine as well.

 

[Sparr0w]

i wish you luck and peace

 

[CantWait2D1E]

Yeah, a few real friends or a loyal gf would be clutch. i also feel like im islolated as hell even tho I have "friends"

I mean you kinda pointed out the distinction. Friends vs. "real friends". Sometimes the friends we got just aren't good enough. Not your fault or their fault, it's just how it is.

I hung out with the same people who bullied me prior to and during our friendship. It's no surprise they all abandoned me.

 

[Eucalyptus72]

I mean you kinda pointed out the distinction. Friends vs. "real friends". Sometimes the friends we got just aren't good enough. Not your fault or their fault, it's just how it is.

I hung out with the same people who bullied me prior to and during our friendship. It's no surprise they all abandoned me.

The talk about friends is making me triggered due to my recent, unwanted circumstances. I'm not complaining or scolding. Just sharing. My issue is I made a self-inflicted chain effect of terrible things happen. Actually I was very blessed 370 days ago. Of course as the time I wasn't fully able to appreciate it. I had the most amazing GF and she really liked me. Why couldn't I propose? Instead I got sidetracked on something that's hard to explain.

Still one long year later and I have a very hard time understanding why I did what I did. I was in a vulnerable state. Once done, un-reverseable.

---

One and a half hours to toast.

How come I don't feel the effects of fasting? Makes me uneasy. I guess I haven't used a lot of energy today.

 

[SSGoingInsane]

I mean you kinda pointed out the distinction. Friends vs. "real friends". Sometimes the friends we got just aren't good enough. Not your fault or their fault, it's just how it is.

I hung out with the same people who bullied me prior to and during our friendship. It's no surprise they all abandoned me.

Can kinda relate, but i have bigger issues with the isolation and GF part. I've kinda not felt anything positive for quite a while

The talk about friends is making me triggered due to my recent, unwanted circumstances. I'm not complaining or scolding. Just sharing. My issue is I made a self-inflicted chain effect of terrible things happen. Actually I was very blessed 370 days ago. Of course as the time I wasn't fully able to appreciate it. I had the most amazing GF and she really liked me. Why couldn't I propose? Instead I got sidetracked on something that's hard to explain.

You at least had a gf :/. i probably wont know how it feels when someone genuinely cares abt u
edit: sorry for unnecessary mini-venting here

 

[artyy]

best of luck. i hope this brings you the peace you deserve <3

 

[CantWait2D1E]

So sorry for being up any unwanted thoughts. I'll just be in the background keeping up on updates now if that's ok.

Peace be upon you

 

[Eucalyptus72]

best of luck. i hope this brings you the peace you deserve <3

Thank you. Me too. I have everything pretty well set up. Still don't know the taste, smell or aftertaste of N. Not until midnight which is 2 & 1/2 hrs from now. I don't intend to have a pause or hesitation then. I hope the 30 mg propranolol doesn't make me too drowsy. And the Dramamine has some sort of effect which I can't recall. I'd better look up.

So sorry for being up any unwanted thoughts. I'll just be in the background keeping up on updates now if that's ok.

Peace be upon you

Not at all. Please continue to post.

 

[janejackson]

Thank you. Me too. I have everything pretty well set up. Still don't know the taste, smell or aftertaste of N. Not until midnight which is 2 & 1/2 hrs from now. I don't intend to have a pause or hesitation then. I hope the 30 mg propranolol doesn't make me too drowsy. And the Dramamine has some sort of effect which I can't recall. I'd better look up.

Not at all. Please continue to post.

Dramamine makes me fall asleep. Puts me out like a light.

The N is so bitter, like a chemical bitter. Drink it down as quickly as possible with as few sips as possible. Hopefully the chocolate and tequila will help with the lingering bitterness.

 

[Eucalyptus72]

One hr and 15 to toast. Means I have to go to my kitchen. Oh well.

---

Yes I read of the bitterness and the aftertaste. Apparently as you say, gulp it fast in two or three, or four, gulps. Then quickly on to the dark chocolate and then tequila.

 

[SSGoingInsane]

One hr and 15 to toast. Means I have to go to my kitchen. Oh well.

---

Yes I read of the bitterness and the aftertaste. Apparently as you say, gulp it fast in two or three, or four, gulps. Then quickly on to the dark chocolate and then tequila.

just a random concern i have, what if the mixed taste of the chocolate, SN and tequila makes u throw up anyways?

 

[Eucalyptus72]

just a random concern i have, what if the mixed taste of the chocolate, SN and tequila makes u throw up anyways?

No SN, N. Well, idk. Haven't done this before. But dark chocolate is recommended a lot. After N. And a shot of something. Many say Bailey's but I don't want to have any dairy. I am taking Propranolol and Dramamine with the toast and tea. I hope it all works.

---

Less than one hour to toast. Unless I can stay up longer. But I shouldn't push it. I mean for extra fasting. Then the N one hr later.

Please keep me company.

 

[LateForTheBus]

I hope this will be a swift and peaceful bus ride for you. (Hugs)

 

[Eucalyptus72]

I hope this will be a swift and peaceful bus ride for you. (Hugs)

Thanks.

---

How many small, flat squares of dark chocolate? I have 3.

No AE other than Dramamine does worry me a tad. I'm pretty determined though.

 

[SSGoingInsane]

No SN, N. Well, idk. Haven't done this before. But dark chocolate is recommended a lot. After N. And a shot of something. Many say Bailey's but I don't want to have any dairy. I am taking Propranolol and Dramamine with the toast and tea. I hope it all works.

---

Less than one hour to toast. Unless I can stay up longer. But I shouldn't push it. I mean for extra fasting. Then the N one hr later.

Please keep me company.

Yeah N, not SN. Sorry for that.
Anyways T-45 minutes until sandwitch.
Ill try too keep u company but its 4:15am here and im kinda getting sleepy... Not used to staying up late but im kinda suicidal so i cant even sleep...

 

[shinohara]

I'm not sure what to say besides that I hope it's not too uncomfortable for you, wish I had more advice
going the chemical route seems complicated, at least for my pea brain :/

 

[Eucalyptus72]

Yeah N, not SN. Sorry for that.
Anyways T-45 minutes until sandwitch.
Ill try too keep u company but its 4:15am here and im kinda getting sleepy... Not used to staying up late but im kinda suicidal so i cant even sleep...

So you are Greenwich Mean Time?

I'm not sure what to say besides that I hope it's not too uncomfortable for you, wish I had more advice
going the chemical route seems complicated, at least for my pea brain :/

Thank you. Chemical as in N? Well, ok. Lots of discussion about it on here.

 

[SSGoingInsane]

So you are Greenwich Mean Time?

Tbh i dont even know wtf that is my brain aint braining. Im basically London time + 1hr
If thats what ur asking

 

[artyy]

Please keep me company

I'll do my best to hang around as long as I can until sleepiness hits... I'm not the best with words so I'll mostly be reading through the thread, i hope that can be at least a little helpful... Nobody deserves to go in a lonely way

How's your state of mind at the moment? If you're okay with answering that of course

 

[Eucalyptus72]

I'll do my best to hang around as long as I can until sleepiness hits... I'm not the best with words so I'll mostly be reading through the thread, i hope that can be at least a little helpful... Nobody deserves to go in a lonely way

How's your state of mind at the moment? If you're okay with answering that of course

Thanks. State of mind is there's a lot more peace than earlier today when I was never more beside myself. It had become enough. I look over at those bottles and wonder how hard it can be. But getting the harsh stuff down and keeping it there... Important obviously.

 

[SSGoingInsane]

Thanks. State of mind is there's a lot more peace than earlier today when I was never more beside myself. It had become enough. I look over at those bottles and wonder how hard it can be. But getting the harsh stuff down and keeping it there... Important obviously.

Hold on in there you got it. Dont worry about AEs and just try to chill

 

[Eucalyptus72]

Hold on in there you got it. Dont worry about AEs and just try to chill

Thanks. So are you knowledgeable about AE? Do wish I had Meto. But one month ago when I started an order I just wasn't sure.

 

[SSGoingInsane]

Thanks. So are you knowledgeable about AE? Do wish I had Meto. But one month ago when I started an order I just wasn't sure.

Nah i found out what AE means today
Im like super new so the only thing im useful for here is for providing company and support

 

[shinohara]

Thank you. Chemical as in N? Well, ok. Lots of discussion about it on here.

yeah, chemical/medicinal/etc
this forum will be very helpful if I ever decide to go that route, I always assumed I would use a more "physical" means, or just wander out in a field somewhere during winter and hunker down

 

[janejackson]

Thanks. State of mind is there's a lot more peace than earlier today when I was never more beside myself. It had become enough. I look over at those bottles and wonder how hard it can be. But getting the harsh stuff down and keeping it there... Important obviously.

Maybe the shot of tequila first, and then the chocolate? That order might counteract the bitterness more quickly.

 

[artyy]

Thanks. State of mind is there's a lot more peace than earlier today when I was never more beside myself. It had become enough. I look over at those bottles and wonder how hard it can be. But getting the harsh stuff down and keeping it there... Important obviously.

I'm glad you're able to feel peace. Your concerns are totally understandable, although I believe you're able to get through with it :)