Final hours • SN

[thebookofdisquiet.]

Finally alone and decided to ctb in a couple of hours instead of tomorrow.

I'm grateful for every single person that gave me their time and attention commenting on my countdown thread, I didn't think anyone would care about my uninteresting last days but all the kind words kept me from feeling lonely!
+ I shared my beliefs and received nothing but respect, thank you so much, this forum is a safe haven.

——·——

About my plan: started a liquid diet (water, tea, juice) Saturday to keep my digestive system "clean", I'm taking antiemetic every 8 hours since 9am yesterday and fasting since 7:45pm (4:30pm now).

I'm going to use Paracetamol, Metoclopramide, Ondansetron, Propranolol, Clonazepam, Xanax and 20g of SN in 40ml of water.
I have a kitchen scale, a spoon scale, a pounder (to crush every tablet) and a straw. I'll prepare 4 backup glasses and also smell an isopropyl alcohol swab to help with nausea.

Drinking the SN in +/- 6 hours.
I'll keep updating here until 15min before.

 

[リンさん]

Oh man, I'm so happy to have found this thread early - I was just heading to sleep, but decided to check SS one last time. Guilt would have eaten me alive if I wasn't here.

It all seems so surreal. We have barely talked, but my heart still shatters at the thought of you leaving. One of the nicest people I've talked to on here is about to depart. So many conflicting emotions to say the least.

Probably not my last message, so I won't be saying goodbyes yet, just hanging out for a while. Your plan seems very solid so far!

 

[DeathSleep]

Good luck with the plan. I hope you find your peace.

 

[thebookofdisquiet.]

About how I'm feeling: really sure of my decision, excited even. All the anxiety is related to carefully following my plan.

Sharing a video that explains really well what I think about death and brought me a lot of comfort now:

Oh man, I'm so happy to have found this thread early - I was just heading to sleep, but decided to check SS one last time. Guilt would have eaten me alive if I wasn't here.

It all seems so surreal. We have barely talked, but my heart still shatters at the thought of you leaving. One of the nicest people I've talked to on here is about to depart. So many conflicting emotions to say the least.

Probably not my last message, so I won't be saying goodbyes yet, just hanging out for a while. Your plan seems very solid so far!

SO HAPPY TO SEE YOU HERE!! Can't thank you enough for talking to me and being so sweet and kind, know that you brightened my last days!

 

[cscott]

Ahhh I wish this was me tonight. Be free back to the No-thingness

You going to keep documenting once u drink or u mean 15 mins before u drink ?

 

[AntHills]

We only talked on here once, but you seem like a really honest, down to earth person, and I'm sad to see you go. If you want somebody to talk to in your last few hours, feel free to message me

 

[thebookofdisquiet.]

Ahhh I wish this was me tonight. Be free back to the No-thingness

You going to keep documenting once u drink or u mean 15 mins before u drink ?

15 mins before, I want to welcome the death of this body-mind with all my attention instead of trying to use my phone at the same time haha

 

[Renee]

Good luck *crues

 

[thebookofdisquiet.]

Update: drinking a bit earlier, maybe in 4 hours.

 

[リンさん]

About how I'm feeling: really sure of my decision, excited even. All the anxiety is related to carefully following my plan.

Sharing a video that explains really well what I think about death and brought me a lot of comfort now:






SO HAPPY TO SEE YOU HERE!! Can't thank you enough for talking to me and being so sweet and kind, know that you brightened my last days!

It's such a bizarre coincidence, but a really happy one! I can't thank YOU enough. I'm so glad I can be here, having done something for you, even if it's extremely small.

Please know that at least one person here (though I'm sure it will be more) is going to be thinking of you. Both now and long after.

 

[Ashe]

I wish you the best and hope that you find your peace.

 

[Renee]

I am saddened I could not help. I do hope you find peace. Hugs, Renee
I will never forget you>

 

[grace.michaels.2]

Safe travels, best of thoughts and infinite peace

 

[dmdmdm]

Good luck finding your peace.

 

[FuneralCry]

I hope that you find the freedom you search for, best of luck with your plans.

 

[thebookofdisquiet.]

Everything ready!

 

[Whatshouldmynamebe]

I hope everything goes smoothly for you! Are you at home?

 

[Teleftaía Anapnoí]

Good luck on your trip, friend. I hope you find peace. It's really cool to know your perspective on death. I also have a similar view and it is very comfortable for me to face death in this way. Goodbye and may you find comfort. I'm sad that I didn't have the opportunity to talk to you more, you look so interesting

 

[thebookofdisquiet.]

I hope everything goes smoothly for you! Are you at home?

Yes! Nothing better than comfort and familiarity.

 

[Whatshouldmynamebe]

Yes! Nothing better than comfort and familiarity.

I agree! Out of curiosity how are you passing these last few hours? (I'll stop with the questions if they're annoying lol) I attempted recently but si was too strong, but it's made me extra curious when it comes to other people's attempts

 

[AnonGermany]

I wish you all the energy you need for this next step. Much love and a Internet hug to you. You seem really well prepared, dedicated and ready for this. Safe travels ❤

 

[SpiritualDeath]

Goodbye friend. I wish you a smooth, painless transition and eternal peace.

 

[thebookofdisquiet.]

I agree! Out of curiosity how are you passing these last few hours? (I'll stop with the questions if they're annoying lol) I attempted recently but si was too strong, but it's made me extra curious when it comes to other people's attempts

Trust me, I love answering questions!

I just took a nice shower, one of the best things in life, and put on my pajamas, now I'm watching gameplays on YouTube and...waiting.

I think my SI is broken or at least incompetent haha time is moving too slow.

 

[SVEN]

Best wishes for a peaceful journey and gentle sleep.

 

[リンさん]

Trust me, I love answering questions!

I just took a nice shower, one of the best things in life, and put on my pajamas, now I'm watching gamplays on YouTube and...waiting.

I think my SI is broken or at least incompetent haha time is moving too slow.

What a nice way to pass time. Showers are truly one of the greatest joys of life, lol. Especially coupled with clean clothes and fresh bedsheets.

I used to love watching YT gameplays a few years ago, but don't really do that anymore. No idea why. If you don't mind me asking, what channel are you watching?

 

[toofargone6969]

You clearly did your research and your plan seems really solid. I hope you have a peaceful transition and minimal pain. I will be following a similar plan in less than 2 weeks. Its comforting to know SS is here and you don't have to be alone in your final moments. No matter what happens we'll all be here for you. Death is just another journey, and I hope for you it's a peaceful journey.

 

[thebookofdisquiet.]

Ooh, let me just share one more thing, this lovely song about death:

 

[AlouA]

Finally alone and decided to ctb in a couple of hours instead of tomorrow.

I'm grateful for every single person that gave me their time and attention commenting on my countdown thread, I didn't think anyone would care about my uninteresting last days but all the kind words kept me from feeling lonely!
+ I shared my beliefs and received nothing but respect, thank you so much, this forum is a safe haven.

——·——

About my plan: started a liquid diet (water, tea, juice) Saturday to keep my digestive system "clean", I'm taking antiemetic every 8 hours since 9am yesterday and fasting since 7:45pm (4:30pm now).

I'm going to use Paracetamol, Metoclopramide, Ondansetron, Propranolol, Clonazepam, Xanax and 20g of SN in 40ml of water.
I have a kitchen scale, a spoon scale, a pounder (to crush every tablet) and a straw. I'll prepare 4 backup glasses and also smell an isopropyl alcohol swab to help with nausea.

Drinking the SN in +/- 6 hours.
I'll keep updating here until 15min before.

hi, i would like to ask what SN means?

 

[thebookofdisquiet.]

What a nice way to pass time. Showers are truly one of the greatest joys of life, lol. Especially coupled with clean clothes and fresh bedsheets.

I used to love watching YT gameplays a few years ago, but don't really do that anymore. No idea why. If you don't mind me asking, what channel are you watching?

I wanted something relaxing so I'm just watching a random Stardew Valley gameplay!

hi, i would like to ask what SN means?

SN means Sodium Nitrite.

 

[AlouA]

I wanted something relaxing so I'm just watching a random Stardew Valley gameplay!

SN means Sodium Nitrite.

Thank you for making it clear.
I wish you a peaceful journey