Final hours • SN

[Kta1994]

Best wishes, hope it goes well

 

[Whatshouldmynamebe]

Trust me, I love answering questions!

I just took a nice shower, one of the best things in life, and put on my pajamas, now I'm watching gameplays on YouTube and...waiting.

I think my SI is broken or at least incompetent haha time is moving too slow.

shower and fresh pj's really is one of the greatest feelings! You seem very calm, I have to say seems nice to have a broken si haha

 

[absolutelyyou]

That video about consciousness you shared earlier in this thread was profoundly beautiful. Thank you so much for sharing. May you find and know peace and ease, friend.

 

[thebookofdisquiet.]

Crushed Propranolol tastes horrible, bleh. Fortunately my sublingual Ondansetron tastes like mint and helped a little.

 

[absolutelyyou]

Lol I had to take that type of ondansetron when I was ill once and I was unreasonably excited it was mint flavored

 

[ClockWorks]

I wish you a peaceful journey from here on. please keep us updated until then!

 

[limaneta]

Propranolol tastes horrible I agree!
How do you feel right now?
Sending hugs and wishing you a safe journey and infinite peace. You are not alone through this

 

[thebookofdisquiet.]

Propranolol tastes horrible I agree!
How do you feel right now?
Sending hugs and wishing you a safe journey and infinite peace. You are not alone through this

Still okay, a bit nervous and afraid of my body's reaction tho!

 

[Thisisme373]

Sorry life made brought you to this, I totally understand. I hope there's no suffering and wishing you eternal peace

 

[thebookofdisquiet.]

Question: should I crush the Clonazepam and the Xanax too? Don't really want to swallow another awful sip but I'm afraid of having to drink too much water to swallow the tablets and I want my stomach as empty as possible!

 

[ClockWorks]

Still okay, a bit nervous and afraid of my body's reaction tho

Glad you feel okay! During my attempt I felt a similar gut feeling. You can't possibly be sure how your body is going to react but you can fact check your method if helps make you feel more sure it going to work out.

Otherwise, consider distracting yourself and enjoying your last moments as much as you'd like.

 

[Letmedienow]

Question: should I crush the Clonazepam and the Xanax too? Don't really want to swallow another awful sip but I'm afraid of having to drink too much water to swallow the tablets and I want my stomach as empty as possible!

I personally would just take the pills with the same amount of water you would have used to mix them crushed into. You really only need a little sip to get pills down. I worry the nasty taste of the crushed pills might make you nauseous or puke. Good luck on your journey and I hope you find peace.

 

[ToTheTwillight]

I'm wishing you a safe journey, it was good to have you around

 

[thebookofdisquiet.]

Just called my parents to wish them goodnight as usual, really nice to hear them saying "I love you" and goodbye for the last time.
Took the benzos and the last dose of Meto, drinking the SN in maybe 1h.

 

[リンさん]

Just called my parents to wish them goodnight as usual, really nice to hear them saying "I love you" and goodbye for the last time.
Took the benzos and the last dose of Meto, drinking the SN in maybe 1h.

This is great to hear. As someone who never got the courage to say "I love you" to my parents (and never heard it from them), I'm really happy you had that moment.

How are you feeling?

 

[AlouA]

Just called my parents to wish them goodnight as usual, really nice to hear them saying "I love you" and goodbye for the last time.
Took the benzos and the last dose of Meto, drinking the SN in maybe 1h.

I'm here with you, comrade..

 

[thebookofdisquiet.]

This is great to hear. As someone who never got the courage to say "I love you" to my parents (and never heard it from them), I'm really happy you had that moment.

How are you feeling?

Now that I talked to my family I feel a bit like crying, just because I won't experience interacting with them again, but that's okay, at least I have something wonderful to cry about it haha a proof that I lived.

 

[リンさん]

Now that I talked to my family I feel a bit like crying, just because I won't experience interacting with them again, but that's okay, at least I have something wonderful to cry about it haha a proof that I lived.

Crying is so catarthic!! So hard to find the rights words now, I'm sorry. It's truly wonderful though. You have most definitely lived

 

[day]

Wish you the best OP and hope for a safe passage.

Sorry the world has brought you here.

 

[lopsidedcrawdad1]

Now that I talked to my family I feel a bit like crying, just because I won't experience interacting with them again, but that's okay, at least I have something wonderful to cry about it haha a proof that I lived.

I felt the same way when I was petting my cats before I really thought I was going to do it. I was able to find comfort in the fact that I wouldnt be able to be sad about it or conscious of it when im gone.

 

[thebookofdisquiet.]

I felt the same way when I was petting my cats before I really thought I was going to do it. I was able to find comfort in the fact that I wouldnt be able to be sad about it or conscious of it when im gone.

Exactly! There'll be no one here to miss it.

 

[XenoPyo]

Wishing you the best and safe travels.

 

[thebookofdisquiet.]

I'm starting to dissociate and can't focus on my phone anymore, goodbye!

 

[Teleftaía Anapnoí]

How is going? Hope you are ok

 

[リンさん]

Not sure if it will ever reach you, but still.

Don't wanna sound all too official, but it proves so freaking difficult to find correct words at a time like this. On one hand, it's serenity, happiness and contentment. I wholly respect your decision and understand it's basis. If anything, I will be going out for a similar reason soon.

On the other, it's bittersweet and a little bit sad. I dont know why. Can't put it into words. I've read and witnessed so many goodbye threads, and none left me with such complex and polarizing emotions.

Nobody really parts forever. And it isn't really a "goodbye" in a sense most people use it. I wish we could have interacted more, but not in a regretful sense. At this moment, everything is as it should be.

One of the very few nights when I'm happy staying awake. Thank you for being in my life, even if it's just for a fleeting moment.

I will be thinking of you, and wishing for a peaceful, painless exit. This is what you truly deserve.

And, hey, if by chance something doesn't work out - I'll always be here.

So sorry for the usual wall of text. Goodbye

 

[HD72]

I wish you a peaceful passing. And if you have time can u tell me how u found SN. I would love 2 join u on the other side. Please take care. U deserve to be free.
Sending love to you.

 

[Ihatepchan]

I hope you find your peace! Goodluck

 

[AlouA]

I'm starting to dissociate and can't focus on my phone anymore, goodbye!

it is sad that i had to see someone as Wonder as you go but yet I'm happy for you for being brave and firm enough to plan your transition , best wishes... If given the chance i will definitely follow your method, it is very well planned.. good luck and i hope for the best peace for you

 

[SexyIncél]

Shit! I wanted to tell you that your posts were beautiful! Dream well, brilliant one

 

[dmdmdm]

Not sure if it will ever reach you, but still.

Don't wanna sound all too official, but it proves so freaking difficult to find correct words at a time like this. On one hand, it's serenity, happiness and contentment. I wholly respect your decision and understand it's basis. If anything, I will be going out for a similar reason soon.

On the other, it's bittersweet and a little bit sad. I dont know why. Can't put it into words. I've read and witnessed so many goodbye threads, and none left me with such complex and polarizing emotions.

Nobody really parts forever. And it isn't really a "goodbye" in a sense most people use it. I wish we could have interacted more, but not in a regretful sense. At this moment, everything is as it should be.

One of the very few nights when I'm happy staying awake. Thank you for being in my life, even if it's just for a fleeting moment.

I will be thinking of you, and wishing for a peaceful, painless exit. This is what you truly deserve.

And, hey, if by chance something doesn't work out - I'll always be here.

So sorry for the usual wall of text. Goodbye

Truly, truly beautiful words. When I CTB, I hope to have someone like you around. I can tell you're a genuine and amazing person. I truly envy you, I don't know why, but I feel like you're so genuine with what you said. It's easy to say something, but actually meaning it is something that I rarely do. As for you however, I can tell that your words are genuine, I do not know why I feel like this so suddenly. I hope to find and be a person like you one day. You seem so selfless, it is so inspiring.

Rest in peace and eternal nothingness dear OP