• New TOR Mirror: suicidffbey666ur5gspccbcw2zc7yoat34wbybqa3boei6bysflbvqd.onion

  • Hey Guest,

    If you want to donate, we have a thread with updated donation options here at this link: About Donations

Status
Not open for further replies.
kettlevinbarq

kettlevinbarq

I'm Tired
Dec 12, 2023
101
I think you should've asked your driver, who's a local, to assist you in the purchase…..
that was my original plan, but the driver seemed like such a sweet, warm, innocent, honest, family man. 0% chance he would've done it and I didn't want him to cancel the trip if he knew I intended to do something illegal because I hired from a very legit company.
 
O

oddetoad

Arcanist
Nov 25, 2023
498
Well there goes my spanish roadtrip idea
OP was just probably not doing a very good attempt tbh , you should try it yourself before you give up
I'm just talking about in the context of getting N from TJ, dude. It ain't that deep.
It's not about how deep , it's basic human psychology we're talking about
 
R

roguetrader

Experienced
Feb 17, 2021
246
that was my original plan, but the driver seemed like such a sweet, warm, innocent, honest, family man. 0% chance he would've done it and I didn't want him to cancel the trip if he knew I intended to do something illegal because I hired from a very legit company.
Understood. I wouldve tried to look for a rogue driver to assist in this task! ….. guess that's why I'm a roguetrader 🤣
 
kettlevinbarq

kettlevinbarq

I'm Tired
Dec 12, 2023
101
Understood. I wouldve tried to look for a rogue driver to assist in this task! ….. guess that's why I'm a roguetrader 🤣
lmaoo. Yeah, I thought about asking one of the sketchy taxi cab drivers around or a stripper in the red light district but I weighed the pros and cons and decided against it because I would've probably gotten robbed/trafficked.
 
ClownCringe

ClownCringe

Remember being able to move?
Jan 18, 2020
204
Yes, the only reason they're hesistant is because it's not enough money.
With enough money you will get N. It's just a matter of asking the right shopowner.
I think its possible you're coming off as too desperate / untrustworthy as well or something about your .. aura puts them off too or scares them if this is how they react to your offer. Try using someone well versed in spanish to help you out bribing them, I think it will greatly increase your chances.
if you get it you shouldnt try to then smuggle it. find a nice place where you are.
 
E

Ernest1964

Specialist
Jan 6, 2023
336
well fuck me I guess. I speak some spanish but I guess bc I'm a young asian woman they think I'm too sus
I TRIED to tell you but you just wouldn't listen... You CAN NOT just go and try to buy N over the counter any where in Mexico. You must NOT just walk in and ask to buy N. Are you insane? . You must be able to tell a good story IN SPANISH about your big dog who has cancer or something else fatal and you've had the dog since it was a puppy and you love the dog and you want to be the one to give it the shot that will let it have a peaceful sleep forever. You don't walk in and ask, "Can I buy N?" Remember that Mexico is a VERY Catholic country.

If you went to the shop that I've used in the past and I gave you the address for... 🤬🤬🤬. I just hope that you didn't fuck it up for other people who actually THINK rationally and can speak Spanish well enough to communicate correctly. So selfish of you to jeopardize the shop for others. I literally spoke with the owner of the shop about 1 week ago and I know for a fact that she had some bottles delivered to her recently, within the last 2 weeks. I have put in A LOT of effort to develop a good working relationship with the owners and I will 100% deny that I know you or know of you. FFS!!!

- E
 
Last edited:
E

Ernest1964

Specialist
Jan 6, 2023
336
if you get it you shouldnt try to then smuggle it. find a nice place where you are.
I used to live in Mexico City and I have helped a few other members earlier this year. I have three bottles that I bought for myself earlier this year. I had no reason to go to TJ except to help other people with translation. I met them at the border, took them directly to the correct shop, I translated for them and then we went and had lunch.

I DO NOT have N for sale. I DO NOT sell N. I will NOT ship N to any one.

The people I helped, I helped without imposing the obligation of any personal financial gain. They had paid for my flight and hotel and meals while I was there. Then after they got their bottles, they gave me a tip, for which I was grateful. I did not and do not "charge" for my help, but I certainly wasn't going to help them all at my own expense, right? I am not rich myself, so if they were willing to pay for my expenses then the only thing that I'm losing is my personal time.

Any way, One guy got his two bottles and I helped him buy the Meto. at a pharmacy on Calle Revolution. He then went to the airport and took a flight to Cancun. The bottles traveled in his checked luggage along with a couple of bottles of Tequila (everyone buys Tequila in Mexico, right?) His plan was to have a good time for a few days in Cancun with some booze, a nice hotel, a few pretty señoritas and then CTB. I heard from him once he was in Cancun and he could not stop thanking me for my help, telling me that he wished he could have given me a bigger tip. I assured him that the tip was greatly appreciated and I was satisfied with the amount of the tip. I never heard from him again so I assume that he found the peace that he was looking for.

I no longer live in Mexico City as I have a new job in a different country, but if they have the funds to pay for my expenses, I may be willing to help others.

- E
 
Last edited:
coolbreeze56

coolbreeze56

Member
Dec 19, 2023
38
His plan was to have a good time for a few days in Cancun with some booze, a nice hotel, a few pretty señoritas and then CTB.

Going out like this is always wild to me. I always assumed you have to be in a mega low depressed/hopeless state right before going out in order to overcome SI. Partying with girls in Cancun is like the opposite of that, but to each their own. Glad he found his peace.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Ernest1964
E

Ernest1964

Specialist
Jan 6, 2023
336
A
I completely agree with you about the personal safety thing. I want to go out peacefully, not kidnapped and trafficked. but yeah carrying a wad of cash as a woman was really scary because there were definitely some…characters in TJ. Hiring a personal driver instead of catching sketchy taxis or waiting around for an uber somewhere which gives people an opportunity to rob me, kept me safe.

1. I speak a little but I guess because I'm not able to negotiate more in a more complex way it didn't help. Another member, said it was probably bc I looked too sus which is likely true as a non-mexican.
2. I always said because my pet horse broke one of its legs and once a horse breaks a leg they're pretty much done for. I said my vet was charging an astronomical amount of money to euthanize the horse so I thought TJ was a cheaper option. I feel like it doesn't matter what your story is because I'm sure they know it's bullshit because really the only reason a civilian comes looking for N themselves does it for one reason only.
3. I chose SN because out of all the options, for me, it's the least likely to fail and the least suffering. Other stuff, my survival instinct might kick in and I'd somehow save myself. Or like, with a gun I'd mess up, blow my face off but still survive.
I already have a lot of all the supplementary stuff to help the SN be successful (benzos, anti-emetics). The SN shipment will likely come through so boom, done.

if you're latino, well versed in spanish, offer enough money, maybe it will work for you?

I'd say if you do try it, before you cross the border, disguise the bottles as something else so if they search your bag they won't immediately recognize it. my plan was: I ripped off the labels off of 100ml aesop bottles and place them in saran wrap so later I could rip off the N bottle labels and make it look like aesop bottles. I also got the aesop boxes to put the bottles in so it just looks like beauty products. I figured if border agents ever swabbed my bag, N wouldn't come up because it's in a sealed container and the chances of there being traces of it are low? not sure how true this is but better than just having straight bottles that say N.
An injured pet horse?! When a horse breaks its leg, the owner usually just shoots it in the head to put it out of its misery. THAT story was not a good choice.
 
E

Ernest1964

Specialist
Jan 6, 2023
336
Going out like this is always wild to me. I always assumed you have to be in a mega low depressed/hopeless state right before going out in order to overcome SI. Partying with girls in Cancun is like the opposite of that, but to each their own. Glad he found his peace.
Coolbreeze56, do a bit of research on an idea called "rational suicide", some times suicide is an act of despair and desperation, some times it is a logical and unemotional choice made after having considered all the other options. I MUCH prefer to deal with those people rather than the former. Suicide does NOT have to be a terrible thing. The truth is that we have the ability to make that choice. We were never asked if we wanted to be born but we do have the self determination decision about when we choose to die.
 
Meditation guide

Meditation guide

Always was, is, and always shall be.
Jun 22, 2020
6,089
dumb question here but do they even have it at all? Someone used to sell it from Mexico but had to stop when they couldn't get it any more. All supplies dried up for everyone including vets.
 
D

DreamEnd

Enlightened
Aug 4, 2022
1,859
dumb question here but do they even have it at all? Someone used to sell it from Mexico but had to stop when they couldn't get it any more. All supplies dried up for everyone including vets.
They have it. It's prescription only though
 
E

Ernest1964

Specialist
Jan 6, 2023
336
They have it. It's prescription only though
That is correct. That is why the shop that I have invested so much time and energy into was working. The parents ran the pet supply shop up front, the daughter (an actual veterinarian!) would write the prescriptions out of the small vet clinic at the back of the shop, the parents would sell the N to me and the daughter would even post date the prescription later on...

Who knows if it is still a viable location to make purchases after kettlevinbarq may have caused the owners of the shop to become suspicious. They are good people, a nice Catholic family with a solid business. I, in no way, wanted any harm to come to their business. I'm pretty sure that I entrusted the wrong person with the address and that person may have damaged our ability to use the site. 🤬🤬🤬
 
  • Like
Reactions: DeadHead
Tesha

Tesha

Life too shall pass
May 31, 2020
405
That is correct. That is why the shop that I have invested so much time and energy into was working. The parents ran the pet supply shop up front, the daughter (an actual veterinarian!) would write the prescriptions out of the small vet clinic at the back of the shop, the parents would sell the N to me and the daughter would even post date the prescription later on...

Who knows if it is still a viable location to make purchases after kettlevinbarq may have caused the owners of the shop to become suspicious. They are good people, a nice Catholic family with a solid business. I, in no way, wanted any harm to come to their business. I'm pretty sure that I entrusted the wrong person with the address and that person may have damaged our ability to use the site. 🤬🤬🤬
I'm fairly sure you've now made yourself a target for an undercover police sting operation. I wouldn't be helping anyone else from now on, if I was you..
 
kettlevinbarq

kettlevinbarq

I'm Tired
Dec 12, 2023
101
That is correct. That is why the shop that I have invested so much time and energy into was working. The parents ran the pet supply shop up front, the daughter (an actual veterinarian!) would write the prescriptions out of the small vet clinic at the back of the shop, the parents would sell the N to me and the daughter would even post date the prescription later on...

Who knows if it is still a viable location to make purchases after kettlevinbarq may have caused the owners of the shop to become suspicious. They are good people, a nice Catholic family with a solid business. I, in no way, wanted any harm to come to their business. I'm pretty sure that I entrusted the wrong person with the address and that person may have damaged our ability to use the site. 🤬🤬🤬
That's rich because if you didn't want harm to come to their business you wouldn't engage them in illegal activity. Stop coming at me in both PM and public posts because I have no control over how other people perceive me. Also, good job making them so easily identifiable in your post on a public forum. Get off your high horse and leave me tf alone
 
huphup

huphup

Student
Dec 2, 2023
109
If you have that much money, would you consider going to Lima or Cuzco in Peru? Seems like its still available there
 
kettlevinbarq

kettlevinbarq

I'm Tired
Dec 12, 2023
101
If you have that much money, would you consider going to Lima or Cuzco in Peru? Seems like its still available there
no, I don't want to die in Peru and I'm pretty sure I have a flag on my file now so I'd get caught bringing it back
 
P

profx

Member
Dec 21, 2023
5
Thanks for posting your experience, sounds pike $1000 was somewhat tempting for them
 
D

DreamEnd

Enlightened
Aug 4, 2022
1,859
That's rich because if you didn't want harm to come to their business you wouldn't engage them in illegal activity. Stop coming at me in both PM and public posts because I have no control over how other people perceive me. Also, good job making them so easily identifiable in your post on a public forum. Get off your high horse and leave me tf alone
Tbh I knew of that source before and Ernest warned everyone you can't just come in and ask for N. You had to create a story and somewhat speak Spanish a bit. It was clear that your story of a sick horse didn't work out as horses just get shot to end their suffering.
All of the people who he has helped got their N from the store so clearly you either did not follow his directions or gave off a suspicious vibe that threw them off a little bit. Who knows if we ever are gonna be able to use the source at all…
Idk why you wouldn't ask ernest to go with you since he would have been able to help you there and you would have gotten your N
 
E

Ernest1964

Specialist
Jan 6, 2023
336
That's rich because if you didn't want harm to come to their business you wouldn't engage them in illegal activity. Stop coming at me in both PM and public posts because I have no control over how other people perceive me. Also, good job making them so easily identifiable in your post on a public forum. Get off your high horse and leave me tf alone
Their daughter is an actual veterinarian, she writes the prescriptions (which I TOLD you about before you went down there). So they are not and have not done anything illegal. You went down there with a stupid story that no one would believe and why? Because you ONLY thought about yourself.
Tbh I knew of that source before and Ernest warned everyone you can't just come in and ask for N. You had to create a story and somewhat speak Spanish a bit. It was clear that your story of a sick horse didn't work out as horses just get shot to end their suffering.
All of the people who he has helped got their N from the store so clearly you either did not follow his directions or gave off a suspicious vibe that threw them off a little bit. Who knows if we ever are gonna be able to use the source at all…
Idk why you wouldn't ask ernest to go with you since he would have been able to help you there and you would have gotten your N
Thank you mmikee1. What you stated is true EVERY ONE who has asked for my help has gotten what they were looking for. I think that helping others find their peace is a noble action on my part and I strongly believe in saying that I believe in self determination AND I have followed through by helping several others find the peace that they were seeking. I don't know if or when they will decide to use the N, that is none of my business, that is between them and their own hearts, but I do know that I have my bottles and just having them brings me a great deal of peace.

- E
 
Last edited:
kettlevinbarq

kettlevinbarq

I'm Tired
Dec 12, 2023
101
Tbh I knew of that source before and Ernest warned everyone you can't just come in and ask for N. You had to create a story and somewhat speak Spanish a bit. It was clear that your story of a sick horse didn't work out as horses just get shot to end their suffering.
All of the people who he has helped got their N from the store so clearly you either did not follow his directions or gave off a suspicious vibe that threw them off a little bit. Who knows if we ever are gonna be able to use the source at all…
Idk why you wouldn't ask ernest to go with you since he would have been able to help you there and you would have gotten your N
I created my story and did ask in spanish. All he asked was if I spoke spanish. was I supposed to get a pamphlet or something? and one google search will show you that euthansia is a common form of ending a horses life. asking for a horse instead of the normal dog story makes more sense if I need to buy 2 bottles because why would a dog need so much? straight up shooting your own horse would be traumatic and psychotic. most people don't have the strength to shoot their beloved pet. and is everyone able to get access to a gun? getting a gun takes at least 10 days and if a horse is already suffering, are you supposed to wait 10 days to end it?
Clearly, I'm suspicious because I'm not latino so maybe he should've factored that into the questionnaire.
he was not in TJ at the time and I already was so yeah, I went, how illogical. and it's not exactly crazy that I don't want to meet up with someone I don't know who knows I have a ton of cash on hand and get robbed. nor do I want to pay for someone I don't know to fly to TJ to do something illegal. he could be a cop. there is no way to verify him or know that he wouldn't just take the money I sent him and ghost.
anything else?
I TRIED to tell you but you just wouldn't listen... You CAN NOT just go and try to buy N over the counter any where in Mexico. You must NOT just walk in and ask to buy N. Are you insane? . You must be able to tell a good story IN SPANISH about your big dog who has cancer or something else fatal and you've had the dog since it was a puppy and you love the dog and you want to be the one to give it the shot that will let it have a peaceful sleep forever. You don't walk in and ask, "Can I buy N?" Remember that Mexico is a VERY Catholic country.

If you went to the shop that I've used in the past and I gave you the address for... 🤬🤬🤬. I just hope that you didn't fuck it up for other people who actually THINK rationally and can speak Spanish well enough to communicate correctly. So selfish of you to jeopardize the shop for others. I literally spoke with the owner of the shop about 1 week ago and I know for a fact that she had some bottles delivered to her recently, within the last 2 weeks. I have put in A LOT of effort to develop a good working relationship with the owners and I will 100% deny that I know you or know of you. FFS!!!

- E

I TRIED to tell you but you just wouldn't listen... You CAN NOT just go and try to buy N over the counter any where in Mexico. You must NOT just walk in and ask to buy N. Are you insane? . You must be able to tell a good story IN SPANISH about your big dog who has cancer or something else fatal and you've had the dog since it was a puppy and you love the dog and you want to be the one to give it the shot that will let it have a peaceful sleep forever. You don't walk in and ask, "Can I buy N?" Remember that Mexico is a VERY Catholic country.

If you went to the shop that I've used in the past and I gave you the address for... 🤬🤬🤬. I just hope that you didn't fuck it up for other people who actually THINK rationally and can speak Spanish well enough to communicate correctly. So selfish of you to jeopardize the shop for others. I literally spoke with the owner of the shop about 1 week ago and I know for a fact that she had some bottles delivered to her recently, within the last 2 weeks. I have put in A LOT of effort to develop a good working relationship with the owners and I will 100% deny that I know you or know of you. FFS!!!

- E
you DID NOT SAY THAT. YOU BARELY SAID ANYTHING. stop making shit up! seriously, are you high? and I DID NOT just walk up and ask if I could buy N. and they know your story is bullshit anyways because every vet in TJ knows why a civilian comes looking for N so she knew what she was doing was illegal and just playing dumb. if she's just that naive then god help her and if you spoke to the owner a week ago and knew they had N, why did you tell me that you had no success last time and didn't say anything about knowing they had N? nice track record of lying. I wish I could pull up the receipts because I deleted your convo because you wouldn't leave me alone and I couldn't figure out how to block you. if you're so adamant you said all these things then put up the screenshots. get your savior complex out of here. I should take a shot everytime you mention how great you are.
 
Last edited:
D

DreamEnd

Enlightened
Aug 4, 2022
1,859
I created my story and did ask in spanish. All he asked was if I spoke spanish. was I supposed to get a pamphlet or something? and one google search will show you that euthansia is a common form of ending a horses life. asking for a horse instead of the normal dog story makes more sense if I need to buy 2 bottles because why would a dog need so much? straight up shooting your own horse would be traumatic and psychotic. most people don't have the strength to shoot their beloved pet. and is everyone able to get access to a gun? getting a gun takes at least 10 days and if a horse is already suffering, are you supposed to wait 10 days to end it?
Clearly, I'm suspicious because I'm not latino so maybe he should've factored that into the questionnaire.
he was not in TJ at the time and I already was so yeah, I went, how illogical. and it's not exactly crazy that I don't want to meet up with someone I don't know who knows I have a ton of cash on hand and get robbed. nor do I want to pay for someone I don't know to fly to TJ to do something illegal. he could be a cop. there is no way to verify him or know that he wouldn't just take the money I sent him and ghost.
anything else?



you DID NOT SAY THAT. YOU BARELY SAID ANYTHING. stop making shit up! seriously, are you high? and I DID NOT just walk up and ask if I could buy N. and they know your story is bullshit anyways because every vet in TJ knows why a civilian comes looking for N so she knew what she was doing was illegal and just playing dumb. if she's just that naive then god help her and if you spoke to the owner a week ago and knew they had N, why did you tell me that you had no success last time and didn't say anything about knowing they had N? nice track record of lying. I wish I could pull up the receipts because I deleted your convo because you wouldn't leave me alone and I couldn't figure out how to block you. if you're so adamant you said all these things then put up the screenshots. get your savior complex out of here. I should take a shot everytime you mention how great you are.
The dog story was perfectly fine. Everyone who went before you talked about dog or cat and got it. Also you could have asked for references from many people that Ernest helped who got N but haven't used it yet. If he was a scammer he would have been banned already
Whatever. What's done is done no way to change it anymore, let's hope they don't stop selling it to foreigners
 
kettlevinbarq

kettlevinbarq

I'm Tired
Dec 12, 2023
101
The dog story was perfectly fine. Everyone who went before you talked about dog or cat and got it. Also you could have asked for references from many people that Ernest helped who got N but haven't used it yet. If he was a scammer he would have been banned already
Whatever. What's done is done no way to change it anymore, let's hope they don't stop selling it to foreigners
It doesn't matter what your story is. You think they don't think it's weird that ernest is constantly bringing in a string of people that all happen to have dogs with cancer? and they all can't pay a regular vet to euthanize them but are still willing to pay top dollar for a bottle of N? use basic logic. and i'm just supposed to take the word of a bunch of internet strangers? he could be running all those accounts himself for all I know. so no, as a female, I don't not want to meet a random man.
 
Little_Suzy

Little_Suzy

Amphibious
May 1, 2023
770
You made a mistake in hiring a driver. Taking cabs would have given you the opportunity to speak with many hustlers and connect with the underbelly.

You were probably reported, which led to your detention.

Most likely, the driver you employed snitched on you. lol
 
D

DreamEnd

Enlightened
Aug 4, 2022
1,859
It doesn't matter what your story is. You think they don't think it's weird that ernest is constantly bringing in a string of people that all happen to have dogs with cancer? and they all can't pay a regular vet to euthanize them but are still willing to pay top dollar for a bottle of N? use basic logic. and i'm just supposed to take the word of a bunch of internet strangers? he could be running all those accounts himself for all I know. so no, as a female, I don't not want to meet a random man.
Well not weird if they say that they want to euthanize the dog themselves which is not allowed in many countries. Also I don't think it's weird, if it was weird then why have it worked when Ernest was there? I understand you not wanting to trust a stranger but unfortunately this is the case where you have to either take the risk of fucking it up for everybody else or taking the risk of getting ghosted.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Sleeper System
Sleeper System

Sleeper System

Z z Z z Z z Z z Z z Z
May 5, 2022
755
Welp, no dice in Tijuana, yesterday.

I live a couple hours from TJ so I drove to the San Ysidro port of entry, parked my car, and walked over to TJ. Took less than 2 min.

I hired a driver for the day so I could hop from vet pharmacy shop to shop without having to wait every time for uber/didi/taxi. I went to at least 25+ shops. They all said that I needed a prescription and that it can't be sold because it's a controlled substance or that they didn't have it. When I offered $1000 USD to buy it, some of them absolutely refused and were shocked. A couple shopkeepers, however, really considered it.

One of the seedier looking small shops perked up when I offered him money. He said he really didn't have it but called up his buddy and asked but he also didn't have it. I asked him where I could get it and he suggested a distributor. I go to the distributor and ask him and he says no of course. I then tell him I'll give him $1000 USD. He thinks about it really long and hard and then goes to a back room. He's there for a while and so I'm like oh shit is it happening? He comes back empty handed and says no. It wasn't clear if he didn't have any or he changed his mind but just no.

I also went to 2 shops listed in the PPeH that said they've previously sold it. They both said no, even to my cash offer, but you can tell from their reaction it was very different from other shops. Other shops were truly taken aback when I asked them but these 2 were just like, nah. When I asked where I could get it, one of the shops just told me to go to the other one.

I also went to a shop another SS member used previously (the member said the last time they tried the shopkeepers said they were completely out and couldn't find it anywhere but I thought it was worth a try anyways while I was there). When I asked the shop, they refused me. They weren't out, they just said it was illegal and wouldn't sell it to me. I guess everyone in TJ is spooked.

So yeah, idk, maybe I wasn't convincing enough or didn't offer enough money but I wouldn't bet on TJ if you want to get N. This was an extremely exhausting and demoralizing day and tbh, just made me realize how much more I wanted to kms. Why is it so hard to die? Why can't I just die in peace?

I guess in the end it was good I didn't bring any N back with me because upon re-entering the US, I got detained. I have no idea why, when the border agent was looking at my document Idk what set him off but he made me go into the detention room of shame. He searched me and my bags. Luckily I had nothing illegal. Eventually they let me go but it was a horrible 3 hours in border purgatory. They still never told me why I was detained.

I'm not gonna go to other countries to look for N after what happened upon re-entering the border. I hope my SN shipment comes through and I guess I'll just have to have a less peaceful death.


View attachment V01.mp3
 
kettlevinbarq

kettlevinbarq

I'm Tired
Dec 12, 2023
101
You made a mistake in hiring a driver. Taking cabs would have given you the opportunity to speak with many hustlers and connect with the underbelly.

You were probably reported, which led to your detention.

Most likely, the driver you employed snitched on you. lol
and possibly get raped, kidnapped, trafficked? there's tons of stories about how TJ cab drivers have held tourists hostage until they paid them or sexually assaulted them. i'm not gonna apologize for preventing that.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.

Similar threads

subhuman metalhead
Replies
4
Views
240
Suicide Discussion
locked*n*loaded
locked*n*loaded
bianbianbianbian
Replies
2
Views
134
Suicide Discussion
bianbianbianbian
bianbianbianbian
princexhhn
Replies
14
Views
180
Suicide Discussion
LunarLight
LunarLight