Why you wanna die? (concise answer)

[Ky204]

Why does there always have to be a reason for someone wanting to end their life?
It can go way deeper than one specific "cause".

 

[Supersadmommy90]

Because I'm just too damaged and prematurely aged, I'm lonely and my best dating years are over, and because I don't want to go through menopause.

 

[trynacbt]

Because of my personality/mind I don't think I'll ever be fully independent and so I feel like less than a person

 

[Nem]

Near death experience from shitty meds, controlling ex demanded I keep taking shitty meds while on hellcation and nearly died with serious injuries. Couldn't get past the damage, sleep 2-3 hours a night,I swear this is killing me
Peace/Hugs

 

[Astral316]

I'm an inept loner dependent on government handouts to survive.

 

[lizinha]

mental health, dysfunctional family and friends lack of support and hopelessness.

 

[Stan]

Anyone wondering why the question was asked in the first place?

 

[737492]

Got sexually abused as a little kid, spent years in a household with a physically and emotionally abusive person, got bullied through my entire childhood, spent my teenage years with no friends, have no friends or significant other now and no hope of ever finding those things, am broken to the point of intimacy being impossible

 

[sammii]

Because I'm terrible at being alive.

 

[FeelingSinister]

Because of my trauma-rooted, bottomless self-hatred, and the excruciating pain it has been producing all my life. This pain has run the show since forever, it swallows every bit of life I manage to nurture. Close and loyal friends, a profession I adore, the love for my dog, an absurd passion for life and a lot of curiosity, all get crushed under this pain that seems to physically transform my insides into crumbles. I love my life and having to end it breaks my heart and makes me feel like an ungrateful bitch, but I will never be able to find a way out this unbearable agony. I just want it to stop. I just want some rest.

 

[Kodama]

Because it was a pleasure to burn...

 

[Final Escape]

I'm a pathological lol!

 

[citysnowfall]

I don't know, but one of these days during a dissociative episode I'm going to kill myself, whether I want to or not

 

[Lonewolfza]

let see, fought for most of my life to get to where i am today. got the house, got the car, got the bike, got the job, but yet no one to share it with. I asked 2 lady friends what is wrong with me and they say nothing, but the evidence proves otherwise through my eyes. First and only girlfriend at age 35. She was a drug addict whom i tried to help to get better (we're talking the best rehab available, psychiatrist, psychologist, halfway house, the whole 9 yards) but on a business trip of mine, she relapsed and we had a fight and I didn't want to talk to her. The day after I got back, I got a phone call from the halfway house to say she had died. What she told me at some stage is that she only started going out with me to use me, but later on fell in love with me, who true that is I don't know anymore. Never been able to find anyone else since then. So, i have everything one could want for materially, but still lonely AF, drinking too much, smoking too much, and generally being miserable (when i do go out, I put on the mask of serenity to show everything is all right). Still have to hang in there for the next 2 to 3 years because of my grandmother. She already lost a daughter to cancer and I wont put her through that pain again. I'm so tired of life, the backstabbers, the fakes, the stupid people. I feel i have achieved everything materialistically, as I mentioned earlier (house, job, car, bike), so nothing left to fight for once my grandmother passes on.

So the short answer is, I've had enough of life.

 

[BlueWidow]

I wrote the post before yours and I was happy, in these unhappy situations, to see someone else laying it all out there. I related so much to what you said. Especially all the asinine advice. Get a hobby or a job! For me it's also, meditate! Learn to breathe! Exercise! Yeah wish I could exercise and be in the kind of shape I used to be except it's hard to do much when you got a gimpy foot. But the bigger point is they are all stupid distractions. I too want a solution. And the cliché that suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem is the worst. Sometimes the problems are permanent. No matter what stupid advice, what medications they put you on, it doesn't change what you're experiencing in your life. I had it all and I took it for granted and lost it all and I don't see any way of getting back to even a tenth of the quality of life I had for so many years. It's not even so much about having a nice house and gadgets and cool friends and fancy dinners and lavish vacations. When I was living in NY last year for a job and was subletting a one bedroom apartment, a small one but on a gorgeous street in the village I was so happy. All my possessions were just weighing me down. But getting rid of everything, simplifying my life, I wanted it to be on my terms, not because I fucked up my brain and could no longer write (which was my career) and had my personality replaced with that of a zombie. Please PM me if you ever want to talk, even if it's just to vent. Xx

Hello Theon,

Just wondering if you're still on here? I haven't seen your name anywhere recently. You were one of the first people on here to reach out to me and I really appreciate it. Now that I've been on here for a while I'm able to PM and I thought maybe we could do that sometime if you'd like to.

Because I'm just too damaged and prematurely aged, I'm lonely and my best dating years are over, and because I don't want to go through menopause.

I am going through menopause right now and it's not much fun. I've been actually looking forward to menopause practically since the first day I got my period. So, although I'm happy to not have to deal with the mess and so on, I'm now having hot flashes. Oh Happy day! >sarc<

 

[ronigail9]

where as a child happiness was just a given and we could have fun just picking up a stick or climb a tree

i was not a happy child and never understood what the fuss about life was about.

 

[TheGoodGuy]

i was not a happy child and never understood what the fuss about life was about.

I guess that is both good and bad, it´s bad because you it seems incredibly unfair to have been put into this existence without ever had experience happiness but it´s also good because at least you don´t know what you are missing it´s like spending years in heaven and then kicked down to hell knowing you will never experience such a life ever again.

 

[MeltingHeart]

That

My brother died of brain hemorrhage and i feel like he could be saved if i had made different choices. I cannot live with the guilt.

that does not sound like it is your fault at all- don't think you need to feel guilty
Lack of parental love- i know that sounds minor and you can over come that —friends and other people u meet later in life can become yr "family" but the knock on effect of early years seems to have been to great- despite my best efforts to get over it and "move on" I did try so so hard. And didn't want to ever blame any as I know all humans- incl parents are flawed . But it just left me to be a fairly damaged individual . Oh and constant money worries - tht again- despite me best efforts and constant hard work I seemingly could not ever over come enough to thrive

 

[Theon]

Hello Theon,

Just wondering if you're still on here? I haven't seen your name anywhere recently. You were one of the first people on here to reach out to me and I really appreciate it. Now that I've been on here for a while I'm able to PM and I thought maybe we could do that sometime if you'd like to.


I am going through menopause right now and it's not much fun. I've been actually looking forward to menopause practically since the first day I got my period. So, although I'm happy to not have to deal with the mess and so on, I'm now having hot flashes. Oh Happy day! >sarc<

Hey I'm still here, just not going on site that often these days. I'd like to ctb in January but thinking about it so far ahead of time just makes me more anxious.

 

[andy69]

Lost love of my life and have nothing to look forward to.

 

[BlueWidow]

Hey I'm still here, just not going on site that often these days. I'd like to ctb in January but thinking about it so far ahead of time just makes me more anxious.

Just glad to hear you're still around. I'm hoping to ctb sometime in December or January. Right now just focused on research and gathering supplies, etc for ctb. Once I have my supplies & my plan in place, I'll try to figure out the best time to ctb when I will hopefully have the greatest chance of succeeding. I really don't want another failure, so I'm trying to approach it methodically this time and not do it on impulse like I usually do.

 

[Moon Flower]

The simplest reason for me is that when there's nothing left for you somewhere, it's time to go, and there's nothing left for me in life.

 

[DeadBirdSaysGoodbye]

Executive dysfunction + slow processing speed. Consequent inability to manage life in anything like an adult manner. Depression and anxiety and relative (& increasing) social isolation as a result.
Constantly f**king up. Unable to bare watching myself bring those I love around me down with me & waste the blessings I have.
I am a f*** up!.

 

[Blueman]

Executive dysfunction + slow processing speed. Consequent inability to manage life in anything like an adult manner. Depression and anxiety and relative (& increasing) social isolation as a result.
Constantly f**king up. Unable to bare watching myself bring those I love around me down with me & waste the blessings I have.
I am a f*** up!.

I can relate to most of this

 

[Mr2005]

I ruined my life

 

[TakeMe2RainbowBridge]

Bpd

 

[MariV]

ennui anyone? existential boredom?
for me tinnitus, insomnia, skin cancer, floaters, ibs, isolation, anhedonia

 

[Blueman]

Boredom due to self inflicted unemployment which has lead to depression.
Coronavirus restrictions making everything worse

 

[WornOutLife]

Because of my lack of physical health care, unemployment (hate to work) and also, because I find the universe and life so pointless and I'm curious to see if there's something else out there or simply, eternal darkness and nothingness. There has to be a logical explanation for life and death and there might be some kind of afterlife (of course religions are wrong but maybe not 100% wrong)

 

[Lilacmoon]

Desperation for freedom.

I guess that's concise.