western_heart

western_heart

trying to save ourself
May 23, 2021
630
The day I signed up for the site, I'd been fantasizing and reminiscing about living in/visiting the western US and I came up with a username based on that. I feel like I belong out there.
If I knew that spaces were allowed in names, I probably would have used one instead of an underscore.

I might change to something new once the option is available to me in a month (I think it's more likely than not I will still be here)
 
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Pookie

Pookie

Somebody you used to know.
Oct 18, 2020
1,051
The day I signed up for the site, I'd been fantasizing and reminiscing about living in/visiting the western US and I came up with a username based on that. I feel like I belong out there.
If I knew that spaces were allowed in names, I probably would have used one instead of an underscore.

I might change to something new once the option is available to me in a month (I think it's more likely than not I will still be here)
Is your dream of visiting or living in the western US still possible?
I was eating a 'stroopwafel' (it's a Dutch thing, it's a waffle with syrup) and well, that's how I chose my name, just some random thing.
I love stroopwafels! I usually have them with my coffee.
 
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western_heart

western_heart

trying to save ourself
May 23, 2021
630
Is your dream of visiting or living in the western US is still possible?
Someday, maybe, if I recover enough to work again & climate change doesn't make it too unlivable.

I've moved west twice & ended up back east with my parents twice. Last time we got free housing for a year (paid for by my partner's family) while I tried to reboot my career, but we couldn't afford to stay. I was too fucked up to work (depression/ADHD led to addiction) and then the pandemic happened.
 
Pookie

Pookie

Somebody you used to know.
Oct 18, 2020
1,051
Someday, maybe, if I recover enough to work again & climate change doesn't make it too unlivable.

I've moved west twice & ended up back east with my parents twice. Last time we got free housing for a year (paid for by my partner's family) while I tried to reboot my career, but we couldn't afford to stay. I was too fucked up to work (depression/ADHD led to addiction) and then the pandemic happened.
Do you mean recovery as in mental health and/or addiction recovery?
 
western_heart

western_heart

trying to save ourself
May 23, 2021
630
Do you mean recovery as in mental health and/or addiction recovery?
Mental health recovery. I need to reduce my suicidality and somehow regain my ability to work if I want to live the life I really want.

I've overcome stimulant and alcohol addiction already, no booze or meth since 2019.
 
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Pookie

Pookie

Somebody you used to know.
Oct 18, 2020
1,051
Mental health recovery. I need to reduce my suicidality and somehow regain my ability to work if I want to live the life I really want.

I've overcome stimulant and alcohol addiction already, no booze or meth since 2019.
Well done on your stimulant and alcohol addiction recovery. I can't imagine how rough that must've been.

I wish you all the best in your mental health recovery.
 
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T

TheFifthDay

Member
Jan 30, 2021
39
May I ask, what's a DXM trip like?
It varies a lot on the dose to the point there are different "plateaus". But one defining trait is it numbs your body up like you feel nothing. You also feel- hard to explain- but if you've ever sat still long enough and your hands or feet felt like they were slightly drifting or stretching away from you, that but x10. You feel happier, mellowed out and wanna vibe to music, and you start getting this "I know everything" vibe. You see patterns on the back of your eyelids but it's not quite the fully formed geometric pattern hallucination levels of acid. Chemically speaking it's structurally almost identical to opioids but in practice it's a dissociative hallucinogen that you either love or hate.
 
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keyakizaka

keyakizaka

Member
Apr 25, 2021
25
my name is sita and i named myself after my favorite album (stranger in the alps)
 
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Jinnberg

Jinnberg

Member
Apr 23, 2021
24
I was originally going to go with the username Junebug, but I figured it would have been taken by now, so I just went with Jinnberg. There's really no significance to either screen names.

They're both fairly common usernames, which would make it harder for my online friends and irl friends to find me. I'd be canceled on my socials if people found out I post here, or if they found out I'm in support of one's right to die.

Though, now that I think about it, I wish I would have chosen a username that had more significance to it haha
 
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J

JustAnumber

Member
May 19, 2021
31
I was told if I killed my self I would become another sad statistic. The problem is, all we are when we are alive is just a number on a piece of paper. What's the difference between life and death if all we are is justAnumber?
 
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puppet_nihilist

puppet_nihilist

cogito, ergo sum
Jan 8, 2021
227
I was told if I killed my self
Damn, been there and heard that. All I can say is that I relate to the crushing sense of mistreatment and injury that abuse and trolling produces. Hugs to you.
 
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W

Wisdom3_1-9

he/him/his
Jul 19, 2020
1,954
Mine is from Scripture - the beginning of Chapter 3 of the Book of Wisdom.
But the souls of the righteous are in the hand of God, and no torment will ever touch them. In the eyes of the foolish they seemed to have died, and their departure was thought to be a disaster, and their going from us to be their destruction; but they are at peace.
 
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Dear Agony

Dear Agony

The Void
Jan 24, 2020
297
It's a passage from the book "It's Kind of a Funny Story" by Ned Vizzini.

"I didn't want to wake up. I was having a much better time asleep. And that's really sad. It was almost like a reverse nightmare, like when you wake up from a nightmare you're so relieved. I woke up into a nightmare."
 
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Pookie

Pookie

Somebody you used to know.
Oct 18, 2020
1,051
It's a passage from the book "It's Kind of a Funny Story" by Ned Vizzini.
Wow, I wrote a comment like that here once. Not as eloquently, but basically saying the same thing. That passage is like my life summed up in one go.
 
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Judah

Judah

Enlightened
Oct 1, 2020
1,551
My username refers to the biblical character of Judas, in some way I feel familiar with him since although one of his biggest mistakes was selling Jesus, he recognized his mistake and due to what he felt he committed suicide, this can be compared to a small but important anecdote of my life, it should be noted that I am an atheist
 
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F

fly away

It’s enough
Oct 28, 2020
110
Just two words from my favorite song. Of course the overall message in the song is that you were saved, but I chose to "interpret" it differently.
 
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Pookie

Pookie

Somebody you used to know.
Oct 18, 2020
1,051
Just two words from my favorite song. Of course the overall message in the song is that you were saved, but I chose to "interpret" it differently.
Which band?
My username refers to the biblical character of Judas, in some way I feel familiar with him since although one of his biggest mistakes was selling Jesus, he recognized his mistake and due to what he felt he committed suicide, this can be compared to a small but important anecdote of my life, it should be noted that I am an atheist
Do you feel you betrayed someone?
 
greyhound

greyhound

Arcanist
Oct 8, 2020
471
I had been lurking for a while but for some reason my requests to join kept getting denied.

So I chose greyhound which is a bus service in the US in reference to CTB in hopes that maybe this would show the mods I was a sentient being and not just some sort of AI bot trying to sign up.
 
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Pookie

Pookie

Somebody you used to know.
Oct 18, 2020
1,051
I had been lurking for a while but for some reason my requests to join kept getting denied.

So I chose greyhound which is a bus service in the US in reference to CTB in hopes that maybe this would show the mods I was a sentient being and not just some sort of AI bot trying to sign up.
Ha ha that's a kinda funny story. You're not an AI bot that's going to take over this site. At least I hope not. :pfff:
 
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greyhound

greyhound

Arcanist
Oct 8, 2020
471
Ha ha that's a kinda funny story. You're a not an AI bot that's going to take over this site. At least I hope not. :pfff:

Now that I think about it maybe the AI bots also want to CTB.. thinking of the movie Her. SS should strive for inclusivity.
 
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F

fly away

It’s enough
Oct 28, 2020
110
@Pookie, I am pathetically admitting that I can't figure out how to put your question in my reply. I plead advanced age and the fact that I can't ask one of my kids to show me because, well, you know.

Fly away…..a lyric from the song, Someone Saved My Life Tonight by Elton John.
 
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Fthis

Fthis

Student
Dec 8, 2020
192
I was just anxious to get on SS and I'm bad at coming up with usernames so "Fuck this!"
 
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Pookie

Pookie

Somebody you used to know.
Oct 18, 2020
1,051
I was just anxious to get on SS and I'm bad at coming up with usernames so "Fuck this!"
Love it! Just the type of thing I would do.
 
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Squiddy

Squiddy

Here Lies My Hopes And Dreams
Sep 4, 2019
5,903
sigh where have you been all my life
It's such a beautiful looking pokemon and fairy type is my favorite type. I love the cry it makes too. I actually was thinking about getting a tattoo of it one day
 
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theebabybelle

theebabybelle

New Member
May 20, 2021
3
"baby belle" is the nickname my paediatrician gave me - felt like getting in touch with a younger, untarnished version of myself
 
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Pookie

Pookie

Somebody you used to know.
Oct 18, 2020
1,051
"baby belle" is the nickname my paediatrician gave me - felt like getting in touch with a younger, untarnished version of myself
That's so sweet and endearing.
 
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W

who doesn't matter

Student
Jun 17, 2019
190
Well, my choice for username is pretty self-explanatory. I don't matter. It's like I am a variable that does not fit into any equation. Put simply, I shouldn't exist.
 
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N

N2Narcosis

Member
Jun 5, 2021
58
Famous bands often have interesting stories behind what made them come up with their band names. In the same vein, I've seen many interesting/creative usernames on SS and was wondering what the thought process behind them were or events/movies/songs that inspired you to choose your username. Obviously suicide would be one such reason...

I'll start: I was going through a hellish time and feeling incredibly ill with very high pain levels and would've done anything to escape the pain. My prescription painkillers weren't working. So I was Googling different ctb methods and inevitably stumbled upon SS. I was desperate to join and couldn't think clearly due to the pain, so I just chose a username that was the first word to pop into my head, which bizarrely happened to be the word "Pookie." There was simply no thinking process behind it.

Now your turn. (Obviously don't give away too many identifying/personal details as we all know this is a public forum.)
I want to die from inert-gas asphyxiation from N2. That said I would die before Nitrogen narcosis could set in. But still it sounds cool.
 
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