Discussion What's the most silly method you've tried?

[ctb_warrior]

20 hours of sleep followed by a few days of physical pain and confusion.

That's too much for a 14 year old.

 

[killjohnlennon148]

My first attempt was with 4,000mg of Lamotrigine when I was 18. I had fallen out of sertraline induced mania and felt so suicidal. Called the ambulance after a couple hours because I couldn't walk straight. Was on the side of the road vomiting before the police brought me to hospital. They discharged me the following morning.

Second attempt was aborted but I walked out of my workplace roughly a month after the first attempt. I walked to a local park where they had orange safety flagging and I stole it before ripping the flags off. Walked to the port and tied a noose in a public bathroom before putting my head in it and applying full body weight. Felt dizzy, vision darkened, saw green spots, however ended up stopping because the police were calling me (had previously contacted suicide hotline who passed my number on to police). Got admitted to a psychiatric ward.

While on the ward I attempted quite a few times. Often by tying hospital pants around my neck. Was unsuccessful apart from one time where I was in the bathroom and was pretty close to passing out. Got interrupted sadly. Don't really remember doing that I was pretty spacey apparently. I spent 20 mins constructing a ligature point out of the bottom of paper towel dispenser in the bathroom and fixed a noose fashioned out of hospital pants to it. It was able to hold my weight although I think the hospital pants held me back because 5 minutes and I wasn't even close to passing out. I intended to use a wooden spoon split down the middle and drive it into my neck although I don't know how well that would've played out. Ended up collecting about 140 grams of salt which I was going to poison myself with via hypernatremia although my salt stash was found before I could go through with it. Tried to choke myself with a collection of about 50 soggy paper balls.

My wildly unstable mental state clouded my rational thinking so it was pretty much impossible for me to attempt in an appropriate manner. I was pretty convinced those 50 paper balls were going to kill me lol. Combined with the safety precautions of the ward there was never any chance for me to CTB in the first place. I actually escaped and ran away from the ward with the intention to hang myself however made the mistake of calling a suicide hotline who redirected me to the police.

 

[ctb_warrior]

My first attempt was with 4,000mg of Lamotrigine when I was 18. I had fallen out of sertraline induced mania and felt so suicidal. Called the ambulance after a couple hours because I couldn't walk straight. Was on the side of the road vomiting before the police brought me to hospital. They discharged me the following morning.

Second attempt was aborted but I walked out of my workplace roughly a month after the first attempt. I walked to a local park where they had orange safety flagging and I stole it before ripping the flags off. Walked to the port and tied a noose in a public bathroom before putting my head in it and applying full body weight. Felt dizzy, vision darkened, saw green spots, however ended up stopping because the police were calling me (had previously contacted suicide hotline who passed my number on to police). Got admitted to a psychiatric ward.

While on the ward I attempted quite a few times. Often by tying hospital pants around my neck. Was unsuccessful apart from one time where I was in the bathroom and was pretty close to passing out. Got interrupted sadly. Don't really remember doing that I was pretty spacey apparently. I spent 20 mins constructing a ligature point out of the bottom of paper towel dispenser in the bathroom and fixed a noose fashioned out of hospital pants to it. It was able to hold my weight although I think the hospital pants held me back because 5 minutes and I wasn't even close to passing out. I intended to use a wooden spoon and drive it into my neck although I don't know how well that would've played out. Ended up collecting about 140 grams of salt which I was going to poison myself with via hypernatremia although my salt stash was found before I could go through with it. Tried to choke myself with a collection of about 50 soggy paper balls.

My wildly unstable mental state clouded my rational thinking so it was pretty much impossible for me to attempt in an appropriate manner. I was pretty convinced those 50 paper balls were going to kill me lol. Combined with the safety precautions of the ward there was never any chance for me to CTB in the first place. I actually escaped and ran away from the ward with the intention to hang myself however made the mistake of calling a suicide hotline who redirected me to the police.

Thanks for sharing your experiences in such detail. I feel sorry that you had to suffer so much in life. Suicide hotlines are the most useless. A suicide hotline contacted me last to last week, i asked him if what i will speak to him is confidential, he honestly said that if I'm suicidal and there's a threat to my life, he will inform my employer the next day I acted all enthusiastic so fool him that I'm no more suicidal. He closed the support ticket.
In 2024, i was given sertraline by gp in UK for my anxiety, it increased my suicidal tendencies exponentially.

 

[killjohnlennon148]

Thanks for sharing your experiences in such detail. I feel sorry that you had to suffer so much in life. Suicide hotlines are the most useless. A suicide hotline contacted me last to last week, i asked him if what i will speak to him is confidential, he honestly said that if I'm suicidal and there's a threat to my life, he will inform my employer the next day I acted all enthusiastic so fool him that I'm no more suicidal. He closed the support ticket.
In 2024, i was given sertraline by gp in UK for my anxiety, it increased my suicidal tendencies exponentially.

Yea definitely avoid suicide hotlines. Or at the very least don't reveal that you're actively suicidal. I think they technically can't do anything unless there's an imminent threat to your life, eg you tell them that you're standing on the edge of a cliff and you're gonna jump then they have to call the police. I always end up calling them because I get really lonely right before and want someone to talk to haha

Honestly I think it's crazy how GP's are willing to hand these drugs out like candy. And a lot of them have a tendency to gloss over the fact that quite a few antidepressants have a black box warning of increased suicidal ideation.

Much love, hope you can find peace, be that life or death

 

[ctb_warrior]

Yea definitely avoid suicide hotlines. Or at the very least don't reveal that you're actively suicidal. I think they technically can't do anything unless there's an imminent threat to your life, eg you tell them that you're standing on the edge of a cliff and you're gonna jump then they have to call the police. I always end up calling them because I get really lonely right before and want someone to talk to haha

Honestly I think it's crazy how GP's are willing to hand these drugs out like candy. And a lot of them have a tendency to gloss over the fact that quite a few antidepressants have a black box warning of increased suicidal ideation.

Much love, hope you can find peace, be that life or death

Yeah, I have never contacted any suicide hotline on my own for this reason.

GP's treat us like guinea pig.

Thanks i wish the same for you, lots of love, luck, happiness and peace in everything you choose

 

[carfemtanyl]

I downed all of my dad's irbesartan
it didn't do much except lower my blood pressure so much that the nurses were concerned

 

[ctb_warrior]

I downed all of my dad's irbesartan
it didn't do much except lower my blood pressure so much that the nurses were concerned

Must have felt dizzy I'm glad it didn't do much damage..,

 

[verminnnn]

i tried to hang myself with christmas tinsel once

 

[1984]

Cutting cherry pits open with a knife because apparently they have cyanide in them. I wasn't even strong enough to cut them

 

[ctb_warrior]

i tried to hang myself with christmas tinsel once

That could have been fatal depending on your age at that time.

Cutting cherry pits open with a knife because apparently they have cyanide in them. I wasn't even strong enough to cut them

Woah in 2019 i also came to know that apple seeds have cyanide. I thought i can buy 200 apples and take out their seed i wonder how could i be so silly out of my desperation.
Cyanide gives a painful death unlike the popular myth that it's instant

 

[chaotic_crow]

When I was 9 i thought if I stayed under the water in the tub for a couple seconds it'd do the job. It did not lmao, other than that probably purposely getting myself over medicated on psych and blood pressure meds and when that didn't work fast enough cold turkeying all of them. Don't recommend that one, blood pressure shot up to 200/180 and i decided to sleep it off (hoping I wouldn't wake up) and i woke up to it being 47/35. Not a comfortable time

 

[StoneCactus]

Drinking massive amounts of water in an attempt to achieve water poisoning late last year. Twice. Both times I simply ended up throwing up a large portion of the water and peed clear for a few hours.

 

[ctb_warrior]

When I was 9 i thought if I stayed under the water in the tub for a couple seconds it'd do the job. It did not lmao, other than that probably purposely getting myself over medicated on psych and blood pressure meds and when that didn't work fast enough cold turkeying all of them. Don't recommend that one, blood pressure shot up to 200/180 and i decided to sleep it off (hoping I wouldn't wake up) and i woke up to it being 47/35. Not a comfortable time

I too thought that i didn't have a bath tub though. I had this thing in my mind if i could manage a bath tub, i could drink lots of alcohol that can knock me off and i could go inside water for sufficient time to drown myself. I guess it'll not work
Blood pressure meds seriously make it the worst. I never had the guts to try that for my od even when i have used OD to try ctb as a teen

Drinking massive amounts of water in an attempt to achieve water poisoning late last year. Twice. Both times I simply ended up throwing up a large portion of the water and peed clear for a few hours.

Woahh..
I wish that could work

In Yoga, there's a process called Kunjal, where we need to drink a lot of lukewarm water and rub on the tongue to puke out all of that water to deep cleanse the system. So, i guess you caused deep cleansing of your body with that

 

[lonely_potato]

Out of desperation I have done the following silly mistakes:

1. OD on Benzo - Knocked me off for 6-7 days
2. Drinking phenyl - no effect except phenyl smell in breath
3. Eating 2 packets of RatKill - no effect
4. Eating crushed napthalene balls - no effect
5. Drinking mosquito poison - no effect
6. Trying to create CO by burning Kerosene - fire out of control, black smoke all over the room and not enough carbon monoxide.
7. Strangled myself with bare hands and then with towel - waste of time
8. Kept plastic bag on my face - the bag got moisture and the bag didn't have any space to breathe and i was soon gasping for breath.
9. Plastic bag + helium balloons - helium balloons didn't have pure helium so it was total waste of time. I had 5-6 big balloons to fill plastic bag with helium. But nope. It didn't work
10. I borrowed some arsenic salt from my school's chemistry lab and ingested it - i started vomiting non stop and I had to administer Arsenic 30 in Homeopathy to deal with it
11. OD on paracetamol - caused choking sensation in the chest. Used Carbo Veg 30 in Homeopathy to ease the discomfort

Add yours
This will help others understand what not to do

I once tried connecting my tailpipe into my car with a bunch of pool noodles and duct tape. Only problem is I own a hybrid car so it never built up anywhere near enough carbon monoxide, and I felt a bit silly.

 

[ctb_warrior]

I once tried connecting my tailpipe into my car with a bunch of pool noodles and duct tape. Only problem is I own a hybrid car so it never built up anywhere near enough carbon monoxide, and I felt a bit silly.

It's alright, not your fault, present day automobile vehicles don't produce CO so it's almost impossible to use it to ctb

 

[greatfalls]

I once stabbed myself in the chest. I didn't get very deep, my survival instinct made me pull out the knife. Didn't want to go to the hospital so I risked healing it myself, which it did.

 

[ctb_warrior]

I'm glad your SI stopped you or it could do irreversible damage to any internal organ like heart or lungs. You are quite courageous though. I can't even play with blade. Although i have done some SH using syringes. It used to be addictive but I stopped.
@greatfalls

 

[ThisPartySucks]

when i was in the army, following my first combat tour, i had a four day weekend.

i was drinking very heavily that weekend, about a fifth of whiskey a day, and i just sat there thinking about how miserable i was that i wasnt killed in battle. so i popped the top off of my sleeping pills, poured a handful into my hand and downed them with more whiskey.

i vomited them up all over myself and didnt even asphyxiate. i had a .45 in my closet i couldve just used but i didnt want someone to have to clean my brains off the ceiling since it was an apartment complex. i woke up the next morning very upset because i felt like i had "failed at failing."

i hate being alive. shit sucks.

 

[ctb_warrior]

when i was in the army, following my first combat tour, i had a four day weekend.

i was drinking very heavily that weekend, about a fifth of whiskey a day, and i just sat there thinking about how miserable i was that i wasnt killed in battle. so i popped the top off of my sleeping pills, poured a handful into my hand and downed them with more whiskey.

i vomited them up all over myself and didnt even asphyxiate. i had a .45 in my closet i couldve just used but i didnt want someone to have to clean my brains off the ceiling since it was an apartment complex. i woke up the next morning very upset because i felt like i had "failed at failing."

i hate being alive. shit sucks.

You surely are tough. Having served in the army with utmost discipline. I can't imagine that level of discipline and strictness.
You were quite thoughtful to not use the .45 in your closet even when you wanted to.
Don't feel bad about it though. CTB is not so easy that's why we are all here. Some of us are here for several years now. I myself have tried to CTB for the last 20+ years. 23 to be exact.
Waking up everyday is like, oh no, one more day in my childhood, i used to be excited about waking up, i used to be like wow, another brand new day and now I'm like
We are all in the same boat, we will achieve success in our goal one day.
Wish you peace, love, luck and success in everything you choose

 

[RadiantNumber]

I tried to strangle myself with pillow and plastic bag, didn't work

 

[yui_suicisawa]

When I was a kid I tried drowning myself and immediately quit after feeling the pain in my lungs

 

[ctb_warrior]

I tried to strangle myself with pillow and plastic bag, didn't work

That was my very first attempt..i tried to strangle myself with a long towel and my vest. I was desperate so i applied all the strength a 13 year old teen could apply. It didn't work. I sat down on my bed, disappointed. I slept off after giving up

When I was a kid I tried drowning myself and immediately quit after feeling the pain in my lungs

My goodness.. That'd have been quite painful. I hope it didn't cause any permanent damage to you. Drowning can be really very painful. I was thinking of trying it after drinking lots of alcohol so i lose my senses and drop into water and i be gone forever

 

[sleepytime5]

Out of desperation I have done the following silly mistakes:

1. OD on Benzo - Knocked me off for 6-7 days
2. Drinking phenyl - no effect except phenyl smell in breath
3. Eating 2 packets of RatKill - no effect
4. Eating crushed napthalene balls - no effect
5. Drinking mosquito poison - no effect
6. Trying to create CO by burning Kerosene - fire out of control, black smoke all over the room and not enough carbon monoxide.
7. Strangled myself with bare hands and then with towel - waste of time
8. Kept plastic bag on my face - the bag got moisture and the bag didn't have any space to breathe and i was soon gasping for breath.
9. Plastic bag + helium balloons - helium balloons didn't have pure helium so it was total waste of time. I had 5-6 big balloons to fill plastic bag with helium. But nope. It didn't work
10. I borrowed some arsenic salt from my school's chemistry lab and ingested it - i started vomiting non stop and I had to administer Arsenic 30 in Homeopathy to deal with it
11. OD on paracetamol - caused choking sensation in the chest. Used Carbo Veg 30 in Homeopathy to ease the discomfort

Add yours
This will help others understand what not to do

I was like 11 years old and in major depression when I decided that eating random "poisonous" fruits would make me die, it did not, but for 2 days I felt so sick that when it passed I actually did want to live again. Another funny one, also as a kid, like 5-6 year old I tried strangling myself with a very thin rope, the ones used for drying clothes, that however was close to killing/disabling me, but my mom intervened, and yes I did it while 3 other people were in the room with me (my cousin, mom and dad)
This unlocked some core memories regarding my childhood, thanks

 

[BlueLock]

Tried to drown myself in a tub as a kid--with no tools or weights I was just holding myself underwater. Naturally that didn't work. And I drank floor cleaner as a teen which didn't do anything but give me diarrhea.

 

[ctb_warrior]

I was like 11 years old and in major depression when I decided that eating random "poisonous" fruits would make me die, it did not, but for 2 days I felt so sick that when it passed I actually did want to live again. Another funny one, also as a kid, like 5-6 year old I tried strangling myself with a very thin rope, the ones used for drying clothes, that however was close to killing/disabling me, but my mom intervened, and yes I did it while 3 other people were in the room with me (my cousin, mom and dad)
This unlocked some core memories regarding my childhood, thanks

Woah, you tried it as a 5-6 years old kid and almost succeeded
Fruits can actually have a reaction . Some people i know can't eat mango without puking. So, yeah, there could be toxic plants, flowers and fruits out there. I faintly remember ricin may be useful. But it's not a peaceful one if i remember correctly.. I'm glad this discussion could unlock few core memories of yours regarding your childhood

Tried to drown myself in a tub as a kid--with no tools or weights I was just holding myself underwater. Naturally that didn't work. And I drank floor cleaner as a teen which didn't do anything but give me diarrhea.

Floor cleaner i tried phenyl. Nothing happened except those burps that smelled like phenyl. I hope that attempt didn't give you any long term probs?

 

[Amara]

Recently: OD on antidepressants and benzos, drink some alcohol but nothing happened, just slept for the day and went to work on graveyard shift. I maybe damaged my liver a bit.
I took a lot of heart medication and still have bradycardia
Tried drinking antifreeze + benzos and woke up feeling drunk

 

[ctb_warrior]

Recently: OD on antidepressants and benzos, drink some alcohol but nothing happened, just slept for the day and went to work on graveyard shift. I maybe damaged my liver a bit.
I took a lot of heart medication and still have bradycardia
Tried drinking antifreeze + benzos and woke up feeling drunk

Woah, you worked afterwards that's crazy.
I overdosed on clonazepam in my college days and i was out of my senses for 3-4 days and i attended my college, but i have no recall of anything from those 3-4 days.
Avoid anti freeze at all cost. Itz harmful based on what i have learnt on SaSu.
Hope you are doing well now

 

[Amara]

Woah, you worked afterwards that's crazy.
I overdosed on clonazepam in my college days and i was out of my senses for 3-4 days and i attended my college, but i have no recall of anything from those 3-4 days.
Avoid anti freeze at all cost. Itz harmful based on what i have learnt on SaSu.
Hope you are doing well now

I was in a kind of a weird place mentally, zoned out, like in a dream. Health wise I don't really care anymore...

 

[ctb_warrior]

I was in a kind of a weird place mentally, zoned out, like in a dream. Health wise I don't really care anymore...

Sameee.. i too was mentally zoned out.. You used the right term for it. Yeah. And it's so difficult to find a method that'll work for sure. I'm trying for 23 years.. The number of attempts i have tried is in double digits still I'm here lol

 

[hihi2027]

I guess "most silly" is any attempt that didn't work? Well, here's an excerpt from my 'ctb plan' thread where I describe all my previous attempts.

"Let me tell you about my suicide attempts. It's kind of embrassing to go through an attempt and fail but here I am. My first attempt was via a plastic bag. I didn't do that much research and the idea was mostly from fictional television shows. You know how they always show people passing out in like 5-10 seconds just from putting a bag on their head? Yeah, that's why I choose to do it. I was already suicidal and wanted to escape. So I waited until 2 am when everyone was asleep and attempted. Unfortuantly I didn't seal the bag with an airtight seal. I used my hands to attempt to cover the gaps between the plastic and my neck but obviously it wasn't strong enough/i didnt have enough coverage or grip to fully cover the air from escaping. Anyway, I just sat there was I waited to feel something happen and well, nothing happened. Looking back I needed to use something like tape to cover up the gaps, but even then I've pretty sure it still wouldn't work. I can't remeber where i saw this, ive seen some study where someone wrapped a bag around their head and sealed it with tape or something, while someonr else in the room watched. They did go unconscious but SI kicked in and ripped a hole in the bag so air went through. I guess its just not a reliable method so thats why it didnt work for me. Even then I would most likely panic from air starvation and rip the bag off before unconsiousness even kicked in. My second attempt was an overdose via salt. You know, kitchen salt they use in cooking? My inspiration came from one case where someone drank an entire bottle of soy sauce and died the next hour. Unfortunatly I didn't get to succeed with this method. At first, I poured a tablespoon of salt into a water bottle and tried to drink it all down one night but it was so salty and tasted so bad that I almost vomitted. Did not drink enough for anything to happen other than feeling really weird and nauseous. My third attempt was another attempt at salt overdose. This time I tried to just eat the salt directly without mixing it with anything and of course it failed and I was left disapointed. My fourth attempt was yet again another salt overdose which went just as poorly (or good depending on your perspective on life). I researched the method somemore after failing and saw that you would have to eat an ungodly amount of salt to even fall unconsious depending on your body weight. even then it is a long and painfully drawn out process that is essentially, a non-method. Thank you for reading my post."