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Moon2018

Member
Apr 12, 2020
48
What will your parents think about your death? What stops me from committing suicide is what my parents think, how long they will grieve. They are deeply religious, they will believe that I went to hell. I do not want a funeral service for my corpse in the church, I want cremation, which I will write about in my suicide note. I would like to die after they die, but they will live at least another 20 years. If my child, relative or friend died, I would grieve, but then I will try to accept their death, which is good for the dead now.
I will also write in my suicide note that no one is to blame for my death and that we should not blame ourselves.
 
W

WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,165
I also want cremation but if they don't respect my wishes, so what? I 'll be dead anyway.

As for my parents, they'll be really sad and need lots of therapy but what other choice do I have? Keep on living in this hell? No way.

You gotta be kinda selfish in order to ctb properly. Otherwise, you get stuck in this world because there will always be someone who loves you and will suffer.
 
Them

Them

Member
Dec 24, 2020
19
For some reason parents don't love dealing with their kid funerals and stuff. They prefer to pass burden of funerals to society if kid was childless or to kids of the kid. Somehow they don't like to face consequences of their own creation to the full extent.
 
S

Spitfire

Enlightened
Apr 26, 2020
1,274
My Mom is already gone to the other side.

If I do not hang myself? My Dad would probably be relieved that I did not hang myself, since I give him nightmares in which he told me he sees me hanging from a rope.
 
BandAddict

BandAddict

Specialist
Apr 3, 2019
338
I don't really know, I can't fully conceptualize it. I'm certain my mom will be very upset, but I don't know how upset. The fear of not knowing how she'd handle it is something that keeps me here.
 
pen

pen

it's A non Getting Down socializing situation
Dec 25, 2020
122
That their offspring is a conscious been, and needn't to prove this to anyone else,
 
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lucacaro

lucacaro

Star
Dec 17, 2020
212
My mom is probably going to be really upset - we don't technically have a "bad" relationship even if I prefer not to interact with her much. She will grieve as a parent would for their dead kid but I think she can put herself together and move on with her life- she is strong like that. My death will hurt always I'm sure, but it will get easier with time. I don't think she will understand just why I did what I did - and I'm not going to try to explain in a letter - but maybe she will find some peace with the fact that it's what I wanted? She doesn't really understand how mentally ill I am though so who knows.

I do hope she will respect my wish to be cremated and also not to go through my things. My suicide note (already written) basically just says what to do with my possessions. My favorite part of my note is asking for all my left over money going towards my dog.

As for my dad - who cares? lol
 
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Deleted member 15256

Deleted member 15256

Member
Feb 18, 2020
55
I also want cremation but if they don't respect my wishes, so what? I 'll be dead anyway.

As for my parents, they'll be really sad and need lots of therapy but what other choice do I have? Keep on living in this hell? No way.

You gotta be kinda selfish in order to ctb properly. Otherwise, you get stuck in this world because there will always be someone who loves you and will suffer.
What you wrote summons it all...
I am feeling stuck here because of the people who loves me.

My mother will die a little with me. And my son... I am afraid it will ruin his life. And the person that I love will feel so guilty.

But every time I gave up because of them I regret it later. And I already know how my life is going to end (unless I suffer an accident before). The question it's just when I will have the guts to do it
 
Deleted member 17949

Deleted member 17949

Visionary
May 9, 2020
2,240
Probably some generic sad thoughts, idk I suck at empathizing with people, I can only imagine they will cry a lot and think about it a lot.
 
K

Keto

Student
Feb 8, 2020
107
My parents would be shocked for a long time especially my mother.

That is why I have to find a way make it as natural cause. That would be a great relieve for them.
 
Water-Lily

Water-Lily

Enlightened
Dec 26, 2020
1,164
In conjunction with a suicide note, my dad would cry. He would feel really guilty that he never did enough to protect me from my brother and stop him. He'd very likely be miserable for the rest of this life
 
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JigsawFeelin

JigsawFeelin

Student
May 31, 2020
132
There's a really wonderful book by a mortician by the name of Caitlin Doughty 'Smoke Gets in Your Eyes' (seriously recommend reading her work if you want to read more about death positivity,
In one of her chapters, she describes meeting a woman whose son had died of an overdose.
When she offers her condolences, the mother of the boy tells her not to, that it's a relief, that she'd been finding him whacked out for years and knew it was coming.
I imagine my family will feel the same.
 
imsorrythatimhere

imsorrythatimhere

They/He
Jan 18, 2021
86
I don't think they'd be exactly that shocked. I am always sad after all. What they'll never be able to see however, is the part they had in it. I don't want anyone to blame themselves for my death, because a lot of what got me here is my fault. It's just that if I had different childhood, I would have known better and been better. And hopefully perhaps they'd be kinder people as a result of suicide, sad or not, although I highly doubt they'd be put into that much pain after they realize the amount of baggage I am and how it is easier without me there.
 
Trisolaris

Trisolaris

Arcanist
Dec 11, 2018
447
They would probably be heartbroken but it wouldn't surprise them. They know I'm suicidal and that I can't stand my existence.
 
Georgiana Darcy

Georgiana Darcy

Member
Feb 11, 2021
64
My father is dead. If he were still alive, I would not cbt - I could not do that to him. My mom won´t really give a damn. She hates being disturbed in her dream world - and a daughter`s suicide will be a nuisance - but she has always dislked and rejected me, so it will not truly matter to her.
 
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GenesAndEnvironment

GenesAndEnvironment

Autistic loser
Jan 26, 2021
5,743
I have no moral/ethical/feelings/emotional/etc qualms with ending my own life that they forced upon me. I don't want to cause them any harm or weaken them, though, since I don't feel any anger towards them acting like the normies that they are. My siblings are completely innocent and will be collateral damage, though, they're like my fellow captives in this SAW-ish movie.
The guy with the key in his abdomen shoots himself rather than dig it out and save the other people from getting skinned alive or whatever, you get the point.
 
A

angelfeather

Student
Oct 31, 2020
181
My father is dead, but my mother will probably be upset and wonder why I didn't tell her how I was feeling. Never could and never will...
 
BitterlyAlive_

BitterlyAlive_

-
Dec 8, 2020
2,394
My parents will feel awful. They're going to wonder where they went wrong, why I didn't reach out to them. But I think they'll be relieved as well, because I won't be a burden to them and they won't have to put up with my shit.

I feel bad because they're going to be hurt. But I'm tired of suffering, tired of my mental illnesses, the world, etc. I can't keep fighting. I just don't have it in me.
 
N

Nicothe13th

Student
Jan 6, 2021
188
I just hate being bullied, it's as simple as that.

My parents know I'd happily commit to escape it so they'll understand with time.
 
B

booray

Can’t do this anymore
Jan 28, 2021
394
My mother warned me to not even think about ctb. She didn't use this term, nor did she even say the word "suicide". What she actually said was that I shouldn't even think about "the other thing", meaning the thing that is opposite of the continuation of life. She's 81 and I'm 59. I know that she will be devastated regardless of my age, but she is just going to have to understand that my depression and anxiety had become so overwhelming that they made my life too unbearable to continue. Wish she could see this in my lifetime, but that's not likely to happen. I'm putting off my exit, as it is, so will take the latest bus that I can, after Mother's Day and her birthday, but before mine. I've already outlived my time and I don't want to make it 60.
 
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