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LaVieEnRose

LaVieEnRose

Angelic
Jul 23, 2022
4,356
Not taking advantage of having better health during childhood, getting involved with the wrong crowd, running away from my foster parents, not figuring out about my autism sooner, so so many regrets..
Well, if it makes you feel the slightest bit better (hopefully), I was shoved into psychiatric care and diagnosed with autism early, and it didn't do a lick of good...
 
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L

Lookingtotalk

Member
Sep 5, 2022
86
taking psychiatric medication for 14 years, way worse off, was better at first, its like a scam or something
I got destroyed by the vaccine. how are you holding up?
ilove how the gov ignores all the neg reactions to the vaccine when there are 10's of thousands of them, makes me sick, didnt happen to me cause i skipped it but im still fucked for other reasons
I got destroyed by the vaccine. how are you holding up?
is that why you are trying to die/suicide, vaccine response? Was your life okay before, what happened if you dont mind me asking, and if so i am so sorry:aw:
 
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promapicide

promapicide

Member
Jun 9, 2022
15
Are you ignorant to dysphoria? Think you're on the wrong site if you think therapy will solve this.
My mistake was transitioning, but even if I didn't I'd still probably be here due to other issues. In my case my dysphoria genuinely could've gone away if I had gone to proper therapy instead of letting my teenage insecurities manifest. I see a lot of other kids in the same boat doomed to have the same outcome, but I also know a few that seem like they'll be able to live a good life now that they've transitioned!
 
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ManicPanic2018

ManicPanic2018

Night of the final day
Sep 11, 2022
182
Seeing other trans people here. Any others get GRS/SRS?

Cause that's my answer here. Waited years for it. Thought it was going to make life at least somewhat bearable. Turns out the man who did it to me (An NHS surgeon btw) fucked it royally up. Made it so that I can't be fucked without a lot of difficulty or pain (and only in plain missionary lmao). Also I've got no sensitivity at all, apart from the pain.

This was 4 years ago. Had revision surgery to fix it. Didn't work. Was told there wasn't anything else they can do. I hate the man who did this to me and hope he fucking suffers. But at the same time I feel completely naive believing this ever could have worked and made me happy. The technology just isn't there.

As much as I hated having a dick, I'd give anything to go back to before I had the op and not get it done. Anything is better than this.
 
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P

pinnsvin

Member
Aug 26, 2022
9
Didn't ctb in my teen years. That would've saved me from years of suffering...
 
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A

akana

Student
Mar 21, 2022
184
My boyfriend fucking ctb 12 days ago, it's my birthday & i hate myself for not ctb when I had the chance . I keep being a gd pussy. I admire how strong he was to be able to do it . im too weak too live but too weak to go out with the plan apparently FUCK SI . I have all the ingredients (co method) . it's just left to me. Keeping my suicide note close.
Omg I'm so sorry :(
Running away from home throughout my teen years.
If I could go back and do it over, I'd stay home, talk to my parents about my problems, ask them to go to family counseling with me, and be open about the things that were destroying us.
agree with this
 
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C

carnivore

I'm a coward
Aug 30, 2022
90
I think the moment I was born. my life is fucked up. bad mother who spoiled my relationship with my father. he didn't divorce her because of me and I wasn't a good son to him anyway. I understood everything after his death. only he was normal in all this so-called family. he died a month and a half after diagnosis. tumor. lung, liver, large intestine. it was a death sentence. the doctors did nothing. everything in my life has been falling apart since my father died. it must be a penance. and I don't have the strength anymore.
 
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Life_and_Death

Life_and_Death

Do what's best for you 🕯️ I'm............
Jul 1, 2020
7,031
it was someone elses mistake (which he regrets) and its "fixable" but doesnt change it had a big impact in my life or what ive been through in the meantime
 
Fktw0rld

Fktw0rld

An end with suffering > Suffering without an end
Aug 29, 2022
404
Spending 25+ years loving unconditionally, sacrificing and taking care of people who didn't love, sacrifice or take care of me in return.
 
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Reactions: Per Ardua Ad Astra, Ixadavt and toiaistired
hellispink

hellispink

poisonous
May 26, 2022
1,229
Not standing up for myself when I was being bullied to death, no fighting back to those who hurt me deeply. Being used by peers to do their homework or do them favors and then be disposed. Having a romantic relationship thinking I could be special and not replaceable. Switching college to be close to my ex who end up cheating regardless. Telling people my ex was the best and then everyone saw everything he did wrong at the end. Thinking I had a place in this cruel world where only evilness and selfishness prevail.
 
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H

Hope:-)

Enlightened
Jul 3, 2022
1,120
Taking medication. I should never have allowed my mother to push me into it,
 
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Quinlor

Quinlor

The stranger
Feb 21, 2019
1,065
I chose the wrong undergraduate course because of my grandmother's death. I always chose the wrong woman to fall in love with and I chose the wrong people to be friends with, and so on...
 
I

iltloml

Member
Aug 25, 2022
81
Cheated on the most important person in my life. I suffered some mental health issues and depression led to relationship problems and turned my back on it instead of fixing things. Ruined my life for good.
 
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L

Lookingtotalk

Member
Sep 5, 2022
86
Taking medication. I should never have allowed my mother to push me into it,
i feel similar, but i can't be mad at her, she was only trying to help, and i blame myself because i actually got off it after high school and went back on it under my own volition, but i truly wish i was never on it in the first place, if my mother, who is passed away now, knew the side effects i would get she would NEVER have done it, i cannot be mad at her, i love her and she loved me, and who knows i might have gotten on it myself in my 20's even if i did win the battle in my teens, too many hypotheticals, but i do replay them in my head often
 
J

Journeytoletgo

Broken and hated 7-14 years long overdue
May 14, 2018
1,608
1. Not attempting CTB in my teen years
2. Traumatized by bullying and someone telling me "I don't want her to CTB" I didn't even know what CTB was, not standing my ground and fighting off bullies in HS
3. Not joining plastic surgery forum In my teens or early 20s
3. Going on antidepressants at 18 for loneliness anxiety depression
3. Meeting an online predator that I had my first sexual experience with at 22
4. Not seeing a trauma specialist for bullying and letting my teenage insecurities manifest
5. Isolating for 4 years after meeting an online sexual predator causing me to become more anti social
6. SA by a guy I didn't know offering him sex on our first meet while abusing alcohol those 4 years
7. Losing my mother last year
8. Not going on campus to escape home life

Basically neglecting my mental health, insecurities, and social skills I was fine before sex. But 6 years ago he ruined me
 
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allblackallwhite

allblackallwhite

Member
Sep 4, 2022
46
I married a narcissist. She abused me for the entirety of our 10 year marriage. I was a dumb redneck and didn't know any better and had 2 kids with her. It's been a living nightmare for about 15 years now.
 
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woe-boy

woe-boy

Never feeling love like that anymore
Mar 30, 2022
45
Staying with my family after the hurricane last year. I shouldn't have helped them rebuild and ran away from here forever. It wasn't worth staying, I am imprisoned in my own home, with religion forced down my throat and grieving my deceased ex. I got dealt a really shitty hand of cards. I'm not sorry for myself, I just hurt a lot.
 
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toiaistired

toiaistired

Member
Sep 12, 2022
11
i created a catfish account 5 years ago bc i hated my life so much and i wanted to escape. with this i felt safe somehow, it was supposed i had a lot of money and a perfect family, also the girl i used for this acount was so pretty. i always felt guilt bc i hate lying, but it was great at the begining bc i was talking with people (over the phone) but i've never felt rejected with this (cause she was goodlooking)
however, over the years and using this account every day (because i literally used it to escape from the reality i was living and i hated it) it made me really not try to improve in 5 years, i didn't even worry about trying in maintaining my friendships, and everything i had in real life, i lost it.
again in 2020 i found a hug with this account and started talking to a guy. we both fell in love without having seen each other. everything was going well, we learned many things about love and you know, long-distance relationship.
i cried every day anyway because i knew that deep down it wasn't real, and i didn't wanted to lie to him and it wasn't compatible with my perception of love. finally two months ago i got up the courage to tell him the truth because i really love him and i didn't want to lie to him anymore.
obviously he blocked me from everywhere (because i lied to him for two years,and it was a big lie, i wasnt the girl i was telling him i was, it's serious)
and i deleted the accounts after this.
today i am totally lost because in my real life i have nothing, and i want to die.
the worst mistake i made was creating this account.
 
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I

Ixadavt

Plaster on a fake smile; plow through another day.
Aug 18, 2022
38
Mother's mistake to remarry my father.
Combined with that, my choice not to ctb when I first had a gun in my hand, two years after the marriage.
30 years later and I'm still a social and emotional cripple.
 
Mr2005

Mr2005

Don't shoot the messenger, give me the gun
Sep 25, 2018
3,621
Not doing a computer course in 2005
 
WorthlessTrash

WorthlessTrash

Worthless
Apr 19, 2022
2,431
My mistake was transitioning, but even if I didn't I'd still probably be here due to other issues. In my case my dysphoria genuinely could've gone away if I had gone to proper therapy instead of letting my teenage insecurities manifest. I see a lot of other kids in the same boat doomed to have the same outcome, but I also know a few that seem like they'll be able to live a good life now that they've transitioned!
Be that as it may, I'll pass on transitioning. It's all or nothing, cis or nothing for me. I think it's just copium. Too many other challenges that transitioning brings that makes the journey overall not worth it, imo.
 
Sadboyspecimen

Sadboyspecimen

Member
Feb 8, 2022
84
Being an absolute pussy. Many times over. But what really fucked me up was trying to engage in reckless behavior as a means to hide the fact that I'm such a coward. Nobody thought I was cool or fearless. Just a little moron baby with a big mouth. If anyone ever called me on my shit I'd crumble apart right then and there. It happened so many times and was always embarrassing. I guess some people just don't have "it" whatever it is.
 
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StolenLife

StolenLife

Warlock
Sep 19, 2022
740
There are so many, really... But the ones I can think of are:
cutting off contact with my then two best friends when I was 12
not trying hard enough to fit in in high school, instead I isolated myself because it was easier
going to med school
 
leeloosnow

leeloosnow

Warlock
Aug 28, 2022
725
I'd say when my breeder shat me out but that's a bit obvs
 
GrumpyFrog

GrumpyFrog

Exhausted
Aug 23, 2020
1,913
Never building a career. I'm 30 and barely accomplished anything, and now I'm going nowhere in life. I should've been brave enough to try when I was younger. Could've given me a way out of this hellhole I'm in now.
 

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