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GenesAndEnvironment

GenesAndEnvironment

Autistic loser
Jan 26, 2021
5,743
J

JustLosingMyself

Mage
Sep 4, 2018
544
Mine does,
But as long as legal reporting requirements are in place we do a merry dance about it.
It's an option, but being in therapy is looking for and accepting that there may be other.
Just keep an open mind.
Psychiatrist is a very different story though...
 
Dr Iron Arc

Dr Iron Arc

Into the Unknown
Feb 10, 2020
19,374
I think from the therapist's point of view, their patients committing suicide makes them look like bad therapists. It doesn't matter the actual context behind the suicide, all that matters is that to some people, this person literally only gets paid to make sure people don't commit suicide. It sucks, but even without the potential legal trouble, it's still in their best interest for you not to commit suicide.

Personally that's why I believe getting one when you're so sure about CTB is a waste of both yours and their time and money. I know it would be great to be able to talk to them about this kind of stuff but until we can take the legal and career-based concerns off their backs it's gonna be rare to find a good therapist.
 
Aloken

Aloken

I choose love
Jan 25, 2021
280
There's no point at all.
Therapy only "works" for people with more simple problems such as "breaking up with your bf/gf", "jealousy", etc
I just wanted to respectfully comment that jealousy isn't a simple problem, or it isn't always a simple problem.. I've suffered from relationship ocd for about 7 years and pathological jealousy is one of the symptoms and the pain that you feel because of it is immense and leads you to think stuff you normally would never think.. Pathological jealousy eats away your soul and destroys relationships and the person you love.. That's all, peace and love to you <3
 
W

WornOutLife

マット
Mar 22, 2020
7,165
I just wanted to respectfully comment that jealousy isn't a simple problem, or it isn't always a simple problem.. I've suffered from relationship ocd for about 7 years and pathological jealousy is one of the symptoms and the pain that you feel because of it is immense and leads you to think stuff you normally would never think.. Pathological jealousy eats away your soul and destroys relationships and the person you love.. That's all, peace and love to you <3

Yeah I used to be jealous too. They're dangerous because you could turn into a serious psychopath or at least a stalker.
So, therapy really helps to deal with jealousy. It helped me at least.
 
Last edited:
Aloken

Aloken

I choose love
Jan 25, 2021
280
Yeah I used to be jealous too. They're dangerous because you could turn into a serious psychopath or at least a stalker.
So, therapy really helps to deal with jealousy. It helped me at least.
Yeah.. Imagine being jealous with your daughter you don't even have yet.. Unfortunately I didn't seek help when it would help. Now I don't even want to see a doctor, any kind of doctor, even in 500m distance
 
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M

Miss_Takes

Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Dec 4, 2020
452
I really do understand the attitude to therapists here however having sat in both chairs I do think most therapists will accept that suicide is an option and a choice.
I do think an awful amount of expectation seems to be placed on therapists in this forum based on peoples bad but also lack of experience in therapy.
I am sorry for anyone who has found therapy to not have assisted them in anyway.
Of course I come into this discussion from my own personal and professional perspective and bias but as someone who has experienced sitting in both chairs and experienced, again sitting in both chairs, good and bad in therapy and therapists the negative theme concerns me.
Therapists are human beings not gods ... they dont offer a 'cure' for what ails us. Rather, they (hopefully) provide an ear to listen and a hand to hold (figuratively) while offering a range of strategies that MAY or may not be helpful to ease the experience of mental unwellness.
Developing a rapport that allows this is a skill that requires time to learn (for the therapist) and time to develop (client and therapist). It is not a quick fix solution to the complex issues of mental distress and is only one cog in the mechanism required to address the causes of distress.
When you consider that there are multiple types of therapy, therapist personalities, client personalities, mental, physical and societal pressures and organisational and legal frameworks that have impact on the relationship and therefore outcome it is unfair to lay a blanket of blame and scorn on 'therapists'.
Does the sector have its head up its own backside? ... in my humble opinion more often than not it does .... but that does not mean there is not value in therapy for many and to dismiss it as a whole is as unfair and dangerous as to suggest that it is a magic potion provided to us and injected without any input from the receiver.
This is your body .... your life ... your choice. But this negative narrative that often negates therapy as an option here is dangerous particularly when you consider the youth frequenting this site who may be influenced away from therapy as an option before they make a decision that I hope anyone on this site would encourage to be taken with extreme care and thoughtful process so that it is as rational as it could be.
It is difficult for me to be on this site and listen to the immense pain and despair (while enduring my own that brought me here) here because in at least some cases (including those with complex factors) I personally think that the right therapist, treatment modality and a wrap around holistic approach that addresses the whole person and compounding issues. Sadly, this approach is generally unable to be provided it seems but this is not the fault of the therapist individually (but we could discuss for years the societal changes required to improve general mental health).
Anyway, I hope some of the above makes sense. I have yet to have a second coffee for the day and have to head out shortly as Ive just seen the time here.
I wish you all as good a day as you can find within you.
 
L

lostmyhope

Member
Dec 28, 2020
42
I think that in order for therapy to possibly be effective, you have to truly be 100% open to the idea that it can work for you and be willing to change. That has always been my roadblock...Even though I've tried seeking help, deep down I'm not ready to give up on ctb and as long as I hold onto that, nobody will be able to get through to me and it's a waste of both of our time.
 
P

Paradox_

Member
Jul 2, 2019
16
I really do understand the attitude to therapists here however having sat in both chairs I do think most therapists will accept that suicide is an option and a choice.
I do think an awful amount of expectation seems to be placed on therapists in this forum based on peoples bad but also lack of experience in therapy.
I am sorry for anyone who has found therapy to not have assisted them in anyway.
Of course I come into this discussion from my own personal and professional perspective and bias but as someone who has experienced sitting in both chairs and experienced, again sitting in both chairs, good and bad in therapy and therapists the negative theme concerns me.
Therapists are human beings not gods ... they dont offer a 'cure' for what ails us. Rather, they (hopefully) provide an ear to listen and a hand to hold (figuratively) while offering a range of strategies that MAY or may not be helpful to ease the experience of mental unwellness.
Developing a rapport that allows this is a skill that requires time to learn (for the therapist) and time to develop (client and therapist). It is not a quick fix solution to the complex issues of mental distress and is only one cog in the mechanism required to address the causes of distress.
When you consider that there are multiple types of therapy, therapist personalities, client personalities, mental, physical and societal pressures and organisational and legal frameworks that have impact on the relationship and therefore outcome it is unfair to lay a blanket of blame and scorn on 'therapists'.
Does the sector have its head up its own backside? ... in my humble opinion more often than not it does .... but that does not mean there is not value in therapy for many and to dismiss it as a whole is as unfair and dangerous as to suggest that it is a magic potion provided to us and injected without any input from the receiver.
This is your body .... your life ... your choice. But this negative narrative that often negates therapy as an option here is dangerous particularly when you consider the youth frequenting this site who may be influenced away from therapy as an option before they make a decision that I hope anyone on this site would encourage to be taken with extreme care and thoughtful process so that it is as rational as it could be.
It is difficult for me to be on this site and listen to the immense pain and despair (while enduring my own that brought me here) here because in at least some cases (including those with complex factors) I personally think that the right therapist, treatment modality and a wrap around holistic approach that addresses the whole person and compounding issues. Sadly, this approach is generally unable to be provided it seems but this is not the fault of the therapist individually (but we could discuss for years the societal changes required to improve general mental health).
Anyway, I hope some of the above makes sense. I have yet to have a second coffee for the day and have to head out shortly as Ive just seen the time here.
I wish you all as good a day as you can find within you.
I am a therapist, and my therapist has not interfered with my plans to die. There are some who accept that death is an option.
 
L

LittleJem

Visionary
Jul 3, 2019
2,444
I have had maybe 8 therapists. 1 for 3 years, she disturbed me in our final session by offering me a place in her 'hidey hole' when the messiah comes or something!!! I paid her for 3 years!!! My latest therapist was one of the most arrogant people I have ever met. He didn't understand mental illness and took my money, when he should have been discharging me to a psychiatrist.

For me, it disturbs me that not one of these therapists, all of whom witnessed me crying and the latest one suicidal referred me back to my doctor. I actually think it's a disgrace. In my experience, therapists I have met want my money and do not understand mental illness. They are not trained in the UK to recognise mental illness or refer people.

I am sure there are good ones out there, but I would not trust one again and none of it helped me. The only things that help me are things that change my brain chemistry. Period.
I'm sorry to the good therapists! I know you exist and I know therapy does help many people. It just didn't help me and I spent 1000s on it, including when I couldn't afford new shoes. Now. I choose shoes.
 
K

Kbeau

Student
Jan 17, 2021
139
I think from the therapist's point of view, their patients committing suicide makes them look like bad therapists. It doesn't matter the actual context behind the suicide, all that matters is that to some people, this person literally only gets paid to make sure people don't commit suicide. It sucks, but even without the potential legal trouble, it's still in their best interest for you not to commit suicide.

Personally that's why I believe getting one when you're so sure about CTB is a waste of both yours and their time and money. I know it would be great to be able to talk to them about this kind of stuff but until we can take the legal and career-based concerns off their backs it's gonna be rare to find a good therapist.
Well said
 
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Moonbounce

Moonbounce

Prototype
Aug 12, 2020
133
I've had my share of therapists and also have had a hard time gaining any help from them. Mostly from my own fault I'm sure, I struggle to put my issues into words for people. My complaint about the entire therapy thing is that I've been more or less forced into it by my family so every few weeks rather than having a helpful session like some people have with therapists it's just a series of awkward exchanges.
 
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L

lostmyself

Member
Jan 28, 2021
76
I think a lot of the problem lies in "good" vs "bad" therapists. A therapist could be the "right fit" for someone and a "terrible fit" for another. A therapist isn't going to perform miracles but could provide help if one is true to their feelings and the therapist truly cares about their patient and doesn't just look at them as a paycheck.
 
B

booray

Can’t do this anymore
Jan 28, 2021
394
My therapist is willing to concede that suicide is an option, but will of course try to steer me towards any option that involves the continuation of my life. Nevertheless, I think that she understand that having ctb as an option provides some psychological comfort to me, absurd as that may seem to someone who does not experience suicidal ideation. Just knowing that it's an option sometimes, but not always, makes it possible to continue on for another day.
 
K

Kbeau

Student
Jan 17, 2021
139
My therapist is willing to concede that suicide is an option, but will of course try to steer me towards any option that involves the continuation of my life. Nevertheless, I think that she understand that having ctb as an option provides some psychological comfort to me, absurd as that may seem to someone who does not experience suicidal ideation. Just knowing that it's an option sometimes, but not always, makes it possible to continue on for another day.
You got it right and a good therapist. If therapy can help, it can help. If not, then that's that.
 
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