Story Thoughts for next time (about the death of SpentStardust)

[DysphoriaKilledMe]

Part of me wishes he was not banned on the off chance he could actually entertain us with a rebuttal to some of what we said, but he did have his chance.

 

[SamTam33]

i think the fact that he accessed this from a country where it was already banned is the most important fact. he went out of his way to be able to access this site which was already unavailable to him. that level of determination to be here shows that this was well thought out before hand and he was making it obvious that nothing would stop him. he wanted to be here and obviously even a country-wide ban would not get in his way. if he wanted to go out of his way to ignore that this site was not supposed to be viewed in his country, then i'm sure requiring an ID to verify you are over 18 would have just meant he would forge a form of ID. he had this well thought out

That's my impression as well. His final goodbye message on YouTube was direct and to the point. He appeared to know exactly what he was doing.

There's no reason to suspect that because of his birth date he didn't know what he wanted.

As if when he turned 18, his brain was going to magically morph into one that told him not to commit suicide.

The disregard and disrespect that society holds for suicidal individuals is infuriating.

 

[9BBN]

But I only wanted to further reply really to say that it's pathetic for someone to quote parts of my venting post to make me look bad.

You can call me by my name. I didn't quote you just to make you look bad. The controversy comes from you characterizing your opinions as "the truth." It's astonishing you even expect statements like "dying is beautiful" to be uncontroversial, even on a suicide forum.

Some people on here are literally no different to the pro lifer in this thread.

Stop calling people pro-lifers or "no different" from them just because they disagree with you. This is actually the most ironic thing you've said, because this is manipulative.

 

[FuneralCry]

It's astonishing you even expect statements like "dying is beautiful" to be uncontroversial, even on a suicide forum.

Only the ones who would disagree with this are the ones who believe suffering and existing in endless pain to be a positive thing. The process of dying can potentially be unpleasant but actually being gone from this world is a beautiful thing as it's the end of all torment. Those who see suffering as being beneficial are disturbing. So it's not a controversial opinion. Those who have left this world have no problems or worries anymore so they are lucky.

There is nothing manipulative about anything that I have ever wrote on this forum. I was only making venting posts about the reality of existing. People should just accept that life is objectively awful but if people want to live then that's up to them. Seriously stop trying to make suicidal people feel worse. I'm tired of this tedious pro lifer thread that doesn't even belong on this website in the first place and many of the arrogant, nasty people that come on this forum. No wonder the user who this thread is about wanted to die. In a world like this it's so not surprising that so many ctb. The truth is that nobody is forced to die on here and simply reading a suicide forum is not the blame for anyone's ctb, to believe that is nonsensical.
But anyway I wish you the best.

 

[9BBN]

Only the ones who would disagree with this are the ones who believe suffering and existing in endless pain to be a positive thing.

This is just not true, and this is the problem with your posts. It's like you can't wrap your head around the notion that someone can think suffering is bad and death is not beautiful at the same time.

 

[Girl-shaped Wound]

This is just not true, and this is the problem with your posts. It's like you can't wrap your head around the notion that someone can think suffering is bad and death is not beautiful at the same time.

I'm sure that there are some people that believe that suffering is good because it helps them grow, brings them closer to God or simply are mental masochists Do I agree with them? Not necessarily, but it's a proof that there are different views on that. Not really truths, unless you mean it like "this is my truth, tell me yours".

 

[resolutory]

I just feel so sad and distressed after reading this entire thread. so many emotions. very sad.

 

[WhiteRabbit]

People should just accept that life is objectively awful

This is just your opinion. Subjective, not objective.

 

[SexyIncél]

First off: people on this forum literally saved my life. Not people like you (Tantacrul), but the exact people you're criticizing.

Second: Will you now volunteer to come here & save people's lives? Because the people here are among those with the least to give—even though they give so much. Many people here physically suffer from horrific ailments; others from cruelties, childhood abuse, poverty. Everyone you could've saved — but refuse to — is blood on your hands

Third: If you refuse to come here & save people's lives (apparently it's so easy), then will you save the lives of the many suffering from houselessness, abuse, etc? Because you're surrounded by people unnecessarily suffering. Our species has been around over a hundred thousand years — yet look at us. Money is made-up points; that we could allocate however we please. Yet people regularly die from not getting enough! Life is cheaper than numbers written in a database

Fourth: our whole fucking species is suicidal. People are already dying from global warming, and we're still hurtling towards it

Fifth: What bureaucratic "protocols" would HELP people, rather than give the false impression of doing something? We're not gonna be saved by "protocols." Our world is full of them. What helps is solving root causes behind the suicide decision

Sixth: Oh, lay off our darker philosophers. I don't particularly agree with them, but so what. Their philosophies of death are sure as hell better than the mindless propaganda we're bombarded with that kill millions. (Obvious example: pro-war propaganda)

 

[BornHated]

Trying to shame and one-up the people for "not doing enough," despite "coming from a family of mental health professionals?" Then prodding on about how they "just let a kid die?" Dude.
@/not_actually_human was spot-on despite your attempt to disguise it as critique, then. No mercy for Dark Triad traits.

Echoing what others have concluded after all the evidence added up. Seeing your lack of interest in developing further constructive argument and actual solutions to this topic to instead focus the fire onto this site-
Sounds like projection. You're pushing aggro on a forum of random vulnerable people, possibly to project your guilt onto here. Preaching from a stand under the guise of moral integrity as a way to unload your own shame onto this forum in an effort to make it the scapegoat of your perceived sins, a cover-up for why you didn't do more for someone in your community once a peer rang the alarm.
Or maybe you just like to bully people, I don't know you.
Either way, those who live in glass houses shouldn't throw stones.


My turn of critique for you or anyone who opposes this forum:
-Do a fundraiser or challenge in your community to spread awareness of resources to help suicidal people/mental health problems
-Prepare a message or letter, possibly even gathering from your community, to his family offering condolences and extending your support
-If you make something that can be sold, give part of the proceeds and donate to a good cause. Poverty, Abuse, and Illness are some clearly identifiable risk factors for suicide. Women's Shelters, Food Banks, and research into diseases always need more help.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------->
All that aside, I can understand criticisms of the culture on this forum, but NO site is safe from the freedom of speech and subsequent cliques that can form. Anywhere can be toxic. People can step up more, but most people on here know how generally pointless a hotline is for their long-term problems. They wouldn't offer the same empty, hollow lines thrown out there by people who can't relate what it's like to be in this position, the ones that usually just make us feel worse.
As has been said: There's a whole recovery section. Treatment, personal experiences, and troubles can be freely discussed here- and many do. Regularly.
Being more intense in checking for age would be really hard anyways as anyone determined enough could just fake an ID or whatever.

Tons of people on here do concern themselves with trying to give productive help to troubleshoot people's problems, but not everyone wants to talk about that and it's their right to privacy. It makes more sense for people who are seeking help to post what's troubling them in particular and then someone can intervene and answer.

 

[Unending]

Part of me wishes he was not banned on the off chance he could actually entertain us with a rebuttal to some of what we said, but he did have his chance.

I presume that he is set in his outlook on this situation which leads me to wonder how he would've disagreed with some of the more eloquent/longer of the recent replies. I can definitely see where he is coming from but am suspicious that he has never had to endure the type of endless horrible experience required to empathize with why some consider suicide an option rather than a mistake. I am referring of course to the type of experience that doesn't have words to describe just how torturous and horrible every second begins to feel, let alone the fact that it never seems to subside/can go on for long periods of time without relief. Maybe I am wrong and he has experienced this but who knows, if I had to guess, I would say he most likely hasn't.

 

[kipa]

To put it simply: just because you are certain that you want to die doesn't mean you should be certain that others should die too.

While I can understand OP's frustration for the most part, I find this accusation to be very offensive because it is straight-up wrong.

The vast majority here don't think others should die, they just leave it to others to decide on their own and respond in a non-judgmental way. In fact, most will be glad when someone decides against suicide eventually and be supportive of it.

You can say surrounding suicidal people with suicidal people is a bad idea because of negative feedback loop, and maybe that's what you wanted to say and I hope it was. That's a fair argument. But to say like we wish death on others? That's just a false accusation.

 

[jamie_]

While I can understand OP's frustration for the most part, I find this accusation to be very offensive because it is straight-up wrong.

The vast majority here don't think others should die, they just leave it to others to decide on their own and respond in a non-judgmental way. In fact, most will be glad when someone decides against suicide eventually and be supportive of it.

You can say surrounding suicidal people with suicidal people is a bad idea because of negative feedback loop, and maybe that's what you wanted to say and I hope it was. That's a fair argument. But to say like we wish death on others? That's just a false accusation.

And far from constructively helping me, it just makes me feel even more of a piece of shit for being here than I already do.

 

[brokensea]

I'm sorry this may sound insensitive but OP did not need to mention I'm a YouTuber and this is my YouTuber name oh and I also make this open source program called this that this person who died used.

Why is any of that information necessary to share? He can mention he has a YouTube channel without literally advertising himself and name dropping his program.

He didn't know who this person was and had to look them up and oh I talked to them one time.

Then he comes on here and callously advertises himself and then blames the forum for the death of a user who made a few posts not asking for any help.

There were many things that brought this person to the end. It is very tragic. But to come on here and blame people here as if they were the sole individuals responsible and who could have saved his life and that we directly killed this person is absurd. It's a terrible thing to blame suicidal people for who are already dealing with so much at the end. There is no real concern here. He isn't like what can I do to "help" everyone here this was so tragic. It really moved me to make a difference. No he plugs his channel and says you killed this person. Making drama he can probably go talk about on his channel and what he did and posted here when he has no clue what the hell he's even talking about.

 

[SamTam33]

I'm sorry this may sound insensitive but OP did not need to mention I'm a YouTuber and this is my YouTuber name oh and I also make this open source program called this that this person who died used.

Why is any of that information necessary to share? He can mention he has a YouTube channel without literally advertising himself and name dropping his program.

He didn't know who this person was and had to look them up and oh I talked to them one time.

Then he comes on here and callously advertises himself and then blames the forum for the death of a user who made a few posts not asking for any help.

There were many things that brought this person to the end. It is very tragic. But to come on here and blame people here as if they were the sole individuals responsible and who could have saved his life and that we directly killed this person is absurd. It's a terrible thing to blame suicidal people for who are already dealing with so much at the end. There is no real concern here. He isn't like what can I do to "help" everyone here this was so tragic. It really moved me to make a difference. No he plugs his channel and says you killed this person. Making drama he can probably go talk about on his channel and what he did and posted here when he has no clue what the hell he's even talking about.

This is a good point. He came to a forum filled with suicidal people, then got up on a soapbox to preach about how they should've helped another suicidal person... NOT commit suicide. There's no other way to describe it. It's just dumb.

 

[AnonymousS]

I presume that he is set in his outlook on this situation which leads me to wonder how he would've disagreed with some of the more eloquent/longer of the recent replies. I can definitely see where he is coming from but am suspicious that he has never had to endure the type of endless horrible experience required to empathize with why some consider suicide an option rather than a mistake. I am referring of course to the type of experience that doesn't have words to describe just how torturous and horrible every second begins to feel, let alone the fact that it never seems to subside/can go on for long periods of time without relief. Maybe I am wrong and he has experienced this but who knows, if I had to guess, I would say he most likely hasn't.

Exactly well said, you can feel it in the arrogance of his comments. Of course it's a tragic situation, but a 17 year old can choose to speak to someone if they wanted. That's not a criticism of him, but it's true. It's not the fault or the responsibility of this forum.

 

[kipa]

I'm sorry this may sound insensitive but OP did not need to mention I'm a YouTuber and this is my YouTuber name oh and I also make this open source program called this that this person who died used.

Why is any of that information necessary to share? He can mention he has a YouTube channel without literally advertising himself and name dropping his program.

He didn't know who this person was and had to look them up and oh I talked to them one time.

Then he comes on here and callously advertises himself and then blames the forum for the death of a user who made a few posts not asking for any help.

There were many things that brought this person to the end. It is very tragic. But to come on here and blame people here as if they were the sole individuals responsible and who could have saved his life and that we directly killed this person is absurd. It's a terrible thing to blame suicidal people for who are already dealing with so much at the end. There is no real concern here. He isn't like what can I do to "help" everyone here this was so tragic. It really moved me to make a difference. No he plugs his channel and says you killed this person. Making drama he can probably go talk about on his channel and what he did and posted here when e has no clue what the hell he's even talking about

And far from constructively helping me, it just makes me feel even more of a piece of shit for being here than I already do.

Yeah, I don't really know what he was trying to achieve with those accusations. That just contradicts his pro-life idealogy of helping suicidal people, by making every suicidal people here feel shittier by shoving responsibility for someone's death onto us. The hidden undertone of his post sounds like to me "you all just killed this wonderful kid are you happy now".

There are lots of things he can do if he hates suicide forums. He is an influencer, he can influence things. He can talk to the admin. He can leverage his social media following and make videos to raise concern and try to shut down this forum, I will hate but respect him for that because he is doing things that are productive to his idealogy.

Instead, he just came here lashing out at a bunch of suicidal people for indirectly killing one of them, and dipped out without responding as if we don't deserve his time. If he was genuinely trying to spark discussion for positive changes in the atmosphere of the forum, I would say he did a piss-poor job at it. Otherwise, it is just an ego stroke for his moral superiority at the expense of some suicidal people's day.

 

[brokensea]

Yeah, I don't really know what he was trying to achieve with those accusations. That just contradicts his pro-life idealogy of helping suicidal people, by making every suicidal people here feel shittier by shoving responsibility for someone's death onto us. The hidden undertone of his post sounds like to me "you all just killed this wonderful kid are you happy now".

There are lots of things he can do if he hates suicide forums. He is an influencer, he can influence things. He can talk to the admin. He can leverage his social media following and make videos to raise concern and try to shut down this forum, I will hate but respect him for that because he is doing things that are productive to his idealogy.

Instead, he just came here lashing out at a bunch of suicidal people for indirectly killing one of them, and dipped out without responding as if we don't deserve his time. If he was genuinely trying to spark discussion for positive changes in the atmosphere of the forum, I would say he did a piss-poor job at it. Otherwise, it is just an ego stroke for his moral superiority at the expense of some suicidal people's day.

I truly think the guy is a clout chasing douche bag trying to use this person's suicide to make drama and spam his channel. Even on the last goodbye song on spentstardust's YouTube channel he comments and mentions his stupid music sourcing program by name AGAIN. It's so distasteful for someone so concerned about this tragedy. It's like oh this person died let me name drop my crap while I'm taking about their suicide. Like GTFO.

A lot of people did not comment or even read the posts that were made here and he just accuses everyone on the forum of killing someone. Tragically making some people feel terrible. The person has their own history and reasons way before the few posts they made here that were the reasons they committed suicide. No one should be accused of that. His actions show how little he actually cares about suicidal people or the death of this person he talked to once that he is on a crusade about while spamming his own content. He's just disgusting honestly.

 

[Pluto]

That just contradicts his pro-life idealogy of helping suicidal people, by making every suicidal people here feel shittier by shoving responsibility for someone's death onto us.

It might help bring this issue to rest to acknowledge the tragedy of circumstance that is constantly manifesting itself in this situation.

The OP is likely a young man whose naivety to the complexity of suicide/euthanasia discourse is a product of inexperience with engaging in this topic. He is not a spokesperson representing a sophisticated 'pro-life' philosophy but an individual in the early stages of shock and grief with only a minimal understanding on this topic to base his stance upon. One source says denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance are 5 stages of grief. Was this not manifesting before our eyes?

Bringing to our attention the reality of death is a very worthwhile message, as is the fact that we are dealing with real people with real families, leaving us with a broadened sense of perspective about our everyday interactions here and their consequences. This could have been an opportunity to engage, meet someone half-way and hopefully both walk away having respectfully exchanged perspectives. Any additional insight for an internet echo chamber based around an irreversible life choice has to be a good thing.

A lot of extra attention has been given to this situation because the deceased member in question had an online following, thus adding heat to our politically difficult relationship with the outside world (or lack thereof). It is wise to approach this situation diplomatically, yet also to pay our respects to the real person that was this young man along with his family/community.

Moreover, let us acknowledge the countless other young people who also quietly pass through our community without being noticed due to a political uproar of this nature. Each of them deserves respect for their story, as does the OP for his sense of loss, just as we each seek (and deserve) respect for our own hardships. Sharing in tragedy does not have to mean fighting one another.

 

[kipa]

I truly think the guy is a clout chasing douche bag trying to use this person's suicide to make drama and spam his channel. Even on the last goodbye song on spentstardust's YouTube channel he comments and mentions his stupid music sourcing program by name AGAIN. It's so distasteful for someone so concerned about this tragedy. It's like oh this person died let me name drop my crap while I'm taking about their suicide. Like GTFO.

A lot of people did not comment or even read the posts that were made here and he just accuses everyone on the forum of killing someone. Tragically making some people feel terrible. The person has their own history and reasons way before the few posts they made here that were the reasons they committed suicide. No one should be accused of that. His actions show how little he actually cares about suicidal people or the death of this person he talked to once that he is on a crusade about while spamming his own content. He's just disgusting honestly.

He is the "Head of product" for Musescore so it is his job to promote the product, maybe it is out of instinct. But it is an asshole move for anyone to promote their shit with someone's tragedy. Even if he wanted to add some credibility and context to the story, he could have just said he "A youtuber with humble following and maintains an open source music software " without namedropping himself and his product, and the post will be taken just as seriously.

 

[Ta555]

Honestly OP sounds like every other average person who has been faced with suicide seriously for the first time and their emotions are all over the place and they need someone to direct all this upset, anger and fear at. That's it.
Saying that, glad he was banned. Explicitly accusing this forum of killing someone is a bit too far. Also ironic that he had had a lot of contact with SpentStardust but didn't do any of the things he wants everyone to do here. Did he ever check in with the boy? Ask how he is? If there's anything going on in his life etc.

I hope OP has someone to talk to and process these new negative feelings he is faced with.

 

[eryu]

He said that he had never told anyone about his intentions to commit suicide and was afraid that if he did, that person might try to stop him. Since I come from a family with plenty of mental health specialists and psychologists, this is the the reddest of red flags.

Unless I'm mistaken (it's not like he had many posts though) the thread this is referencing is right here:
https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/consequences-of-suicide-plan-failed-suicide-in-italy.99906/

He didn't say he'd never told anyone. He said he hadn't told any professionals or helplines.
It would be alarming if he'd never talked to anyone online or irl about his feelings. Maybe that's the case. But it's not what he said. And as he mentioned in another post thinking about suicide methods since he was 10, I wonder if he might have tried to talk about it at some point.
Also, he doesn't just say he is worried that someone would stop him. He says he is worried he would be hospitalized.
and someone responded to that with this post suggesting that he still try to seek help:

https://sanctioned-suicide.net/thre...an-failed-suicide-in-italy.99906/post-1729473
"If there's even a tiny bit of you that wants to seek help, seek it. Don't make a permanent decision like this if you're not entirely sure. There's people you can talk to and things you can say that won't automatically hospitalise you. I mean fuck, I'm UK based so it might be different, you could tell any professional you see that you're gonna off yourself and you'll be lucky if you get anything more than a brief conversation let alone hospitalisation."

In other threads, people dissuaded him from using the train method.
In his final threads, I can see comments meant to be supportive, that sound a tad too validating and don't really question if he's ok, etc.
Sometimes it's just a matter of who's online at the time, who goes and decides to post in a thread.
If you look, you can see many other threads, where people are asked if they're sure, if they're ready, if they'd rather not, etc.
People who admit to being young (or are suspected of it) seem to get this treatment more.
There actually are many posters here who are extremely critical of the way people tend to default to validation of a person's reasons and there are ongoing discussions about this.

Maybe if someone had sent him a PM asking if he wanted to talk, he'd have taken them up on it. Maybe people did and he wasn't into it.
There is a higher chance of this happening the longer someone is here and the more they post. He wasn't around for long and made few posts.

I also don't see that he was aided a great deal by any information or imput gathered here.
The method he went with was being struck by a train. He made a thread asking for help with this...people told him "you shouldn't" and posted things that scare people off of taking that route (there was a disturbing account of conscious decapped head). That's what they always do with the train threads.
So while I understand the "wow. that takes courage" comments make you want to put your fist through the screen and wring someone's neck, the most relevant stuff he seemed to have got from this site was discouragement from what he eventually did.
If this site had not existed, I can't see there being much difference in his case (and this isn't my opinion for everyone who has come here).
He seems to have made his decision based on what he knew was a readily available method and thinking it through by himself.

 

[justwanasleep]

I'm the one that called his method brave. I stand by what I said. I don't want anyone to die apart from myself but for these 2 months I have left I'll always think lying down and waiting to be hit by a train is massively brave and I'm never going to lie about that.
I don't really understand a lot of the replies here the op had to think really hard on weather he had ever actually interacted with Spentstardust and hes now getting pity for grieving??? It's a joke this isn't his best friend or family they allegedly spoke once.
As sad as it is for anyone to die he wanted to kill himself, he planned it out properly and it worked.
He. Killed. Himself.
Are creative people that know about technology not allowed to be suicidal? It's clear the op is going to make a monetised video for YouTube he will act like it's altruistic but we all know it's for clout. Op I wish you all the best for the future whist your cashing in on the death of someone you spoke to once.
I'm leaving this site it's become nothing like what I thought it would be. I can't believe a lot of people are acting shocked and appalled that someone has killed themselves. I feel like I'm in a parallel universe reading this thread.
Thank you everyone and goodbye.

 

[Per Ardua Ad Astra]

@justwanasleep : I understand

Please see below — it seems his plan had been envisioned long ago

Re: @SpentStardust — aka System64 on his YouTube channel

**Note : OP / YouTuber — aka Musescore


Story of a Cursed Knight - a System64 original piece

System64

10
Likes


119
Views


Dec 20
2021
​

[Composed: early October 2021]

This is my first example of storytelling through music. After composing Graveyard of Memories, everything I tried to compose simply failed; so, I tried to come up with a story that would help me compose. I'd love to hear your own stories based on this piece, so if you wanna come up with a story yourself you shouldn't read past this as it is the story I came up with.

The story (TW: mental instability, suicide):

In a fortified medieval village, there was once a knight, born in a family of knights, but cursed with a terrible power: the ability to feel other people's pain. At first he was able to control it, to restrict the flow of suffering, and thus he was still able to protect his village. But as time went on, it became more and more of a burden, like a heavy rock never lifted from his shoulders; and yet, he carried the weight, as he knew he was the only one who could do so. But even an exceptionally strong human mind eventually falls to such heavy pressure; and as time went on, the pain began to take more of a toll on him. Day after day he wondered more if what he was doing was right; if he was on the enemy's side, the people he now had as allies would be cruel faceless enemies, and his enemies would be friends. Was it right to kill someone just for having a flag of different colours? Feeling constantly the pain of those he slaughtered, he could not answer this question. Eventually the storm in his mind was too much to bear, and he tried to look everywhere for an answer, but he found none. Until... he began to see a light out of the dark tunnel he was in. A solution that could fix his situation, but a terrible one. Trembling, and assaulted by pain, guilt and doubt, he decided to go through with it. The knight was no more.



Software used: LMMS
VST plugins: BBC Symphony Orchestra Discover by Spitfire Audio,
LABS by Spitfire Audio
Soundfonts: **Musescore** General

Are creative people that know about technology not allowed to be suicidal?

 

[DeadButDreaming]

It's unfortunate the OP was banned. He wasn't asking for the site to be banned. He also had the courage to exchange ideas with us directly, and he did so respectfully.

We're in a precarious position already. Making enemies unnecessarily will shorten the forum's lifespan.

I don't think we're culpable though. By the time a person arrives here they're already in a tremendously dark state of mind. If intervention is the goal it has to take place in the offline world. We can't be expected to be mental health professionals.

I can understand why he is upset, but there isn't always someone to blame. It's actually ironic that a person commits suicide and other suicidal people cop the blame.

 

[Ta555]

It's unfortunate the OP was banned. He wasn't asking for the site to be banned. He also had the courage to exchange ideas with us directly, and he did so respectfully.

We're in a precarious position already. Making enemies unnecessarily will shorten the forum's lifespan.

I don't think we're culpable though. By the time a person arrives here they're already in a tremendously dark state of mind. If intervention is the goal it has to take place in the offline world. We can't be expected to be mental health professionals.

I can understand why he is upset, but there isn't always someone to blame. It's actually ironic that a person commits suicide and other suicidal people cop the blame.

I don't think he did it respectfully at all. Making a tally of how he has killed zero and SaSu has killed at least one minor was actually really disgusting to me.

This is a forum. We are not an organisation or institution that has a duty of care or laws to abide by. All this is is a place for people to come and discuss. Him accusing that SaSu, ie all the people here, collectively killed a minor is kind of sick and is triggering me tbh. We have rules to not encourage death but we have no duty to anyone to enquire deeply into their welfare and psyche. As terrible as that might sound this is also what makes this place a safe haven for people since they know they're not going to be interrogated.

Such a young person dying is a fucking tragedy but we are not his family, his school, his doctor and a myriad of other community services that could've and should've intervened and checked on him.

Coming here and blaming SaSu for an action that was clearly premeditated a long time ago, blaming SaSu just because that was the last place he expressed himself is outrageous.

 

[MidnightDream]

At the end of the day, it is not this forum's responsibility to 'save lives'. We aren't therapists. We aren't trained professionals. To insinuate that everyone who comes across a 'goodbye' post and doesn't say xyz is now responsible for that person's death is absurd.

People make their own choices. And whilst we don't all agree on everything here, for the most part all able to agree on one thing:
That we all do, and should, have a choice.
Whatever that choice is - we respect it. We respect each other.

Anyone dying is upsetting. No one here wants anyone to want to be dead. We want people to find peace, in whatever way that looks like for them.
If someone's idea of peace and happiness is ending their life, who are we to tell them otherwise?

 

[well2hell]

One source says denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance are 5 stages of grief. Was this not manifesting before our eyes?

An aside, but the theory of the five stages of grief is bunk: https://www.theatlantic.com/science/archive/2022/10/five-stages-complicated-grief-wrong/671710/

 

[AnonymousS]

I don't think he did it respectfully at all. Making a tally of how he has killed zero and SaSu has killed at least one minor was actually really disgusting to me.

This is a forum. We are not an organisation or institution that has a duty of care or laws to abide by. All this is is a place for people to come and discuss. Him accusing that SaSu, ie all the people here, collectively killed a minor is kind of sick and is triggering me tbh. We have rules to not encourage death but we have no duty to anyone to enquire deeply into their welfare and psyche. As terrible as that might sound this is also what makes this place a safe haven for people since they know they're not going to be interrogated.

Such a young person dying is a fucking tragedy but we are not his family, his school, his doctor and a myriad of other community services that could've and should've intervened and checked on him.

Coming here and blaming SaSu for an action that was clearly premeditated a long time ago, blaming SaSu just because that was the last place he expressed himself is outrageous.

I agree, very well expressed. It was offensive and needless.

An aside, but the theory of the five stages of grief is bunk: https://www.theatlantic.com/science/archive/2022/10/five-stages-complicated-grief-wrong/671710/

I doubt he was even in real grief, it may have shocked him, but his contradictory rant was more about himself and his need to stroke his own ego. Just my opinion.

 

[Secrets1]

Yeah, I lied. I am being judgemental.

I'm judging that a minor died because of lack of protocol.

Me: Being judgemental when I said I wouldn't be
SS: Allowing a minor to die

Yeah, my lack of etiquette is the the story here, isn't it?

I love how you would rather do anything other than take on board the criticism I'm delivering to you.

It was addressed with "hindsight is 20/20"

Come in here pretending to want a genuine discussion when it's really just bait, switch, gaslight is not the right way to go about this.

Your characterization of "SS allowing a minor to die" is out of touch and inflammatory. Especially in relation to your own attempted presentation to be the white knight.