The SS lounge

[Brick In The Wall]

Idk how they're gonna diagnose it when it's a virtual appointment

That's what I'm wondering too.

 

[Squiddy]

That's what I'm wondering too.

I thought I could schedule one online, but it looks like I'll have to call tomorrow

 

[Carina]

Idk how they're gonna diagnose it when it's a virtual appointment

get a go pro, string, and a hose ready... might want some throat numbing.

 

[Soulless Angel]

Just dropping in with a hello, tried taking a break from here, tbh have no time to breathe let alone be on here, but damn I am back as much as I can, I miss this place!
Only back coz stuff happened yesterday which mean's I currently can't work again (actually really happy about that as it mean's I don't have to deal with people for a while)

How is everyone?

 

[RM5998]

Training program for work is slated to end this week, and we get to work right after that. They're teaching frontend for now, so I'm guessing this one is going to be a pretty shitty job, at least at the start.

Who am I kidding, almost all software development jobs in India are trash. At least this company seems like one that won't overwork me.

 

[Squiddy]

I'm not sure if I should still call my doctor today or not. Haven't thrown up since last night

 

[Brick In The Wall]

I'm not sure if I should still call my doctor today or not. Haven't thrown up since last night

You should, it's still a semi serious issue and you should get a medical opinion.

 

[Squiddy]

You should, it's still a semi serious issue and you should get a medical opinion.

Just got off the phone with my mom and she said if I'm not experiencing the symptoms anymore to not call. She also said I went to the doctor last year for it and they told me I had a polyp in my gallbladder and the surgeon said it would dissolve

 

[Brick In The Wall]

Just got off the phone with my mom and she said if I'm not experiencing the symptoms anymore to not call. She also said I went to the doctor last year for it and they told me I had a polyp in my gallbladder and the surgeon said it would dissolve

Well you guys know what's best. But definitely call if it happens again anytime soon.

 

[Squiddy]

Well you guys know what's best. But definitely call if it happens again anytime soon.

Okay. Hopefully it doesn't because I'm getting sick of throwing up

 

[Brick In The Wall]

Just dropping in with a hello, tried taking a break from here, tbh have no time to breathe let alone be on here, but damn I am back as much as I can, I miss this place!
Only back coz stuff happened yesterday which mean's I currently can't work again (actually really happy about that as it mean's I don't have to deal with people for a while)

How is everyone?

It's good to take a break from time to time. This place can be a rollercoaster for sure. I'm sorry to hear you can't work right now but atleast you're taking it well.

Training program for work is slated to end this week, and we get to work right after that. They're teaching frontend for now, so I'm guessing this one is going to be a pretty shitty job, at least at the start.

Who am I kidding, almost all software development jobs in India are trash. At least this company seems like one that won't overwork me.

Alot of programming jobs get outsourced to India. If you could get experience there and move you'd have a higher income potential.

Okay. Hopefully it doesn't because I'm getting sick of throwing up

I bet it's frustrating, I hope you heal up soon!

 

[Squiddy]

It's good to take a break from time to time. This place can be a rollercoaster for sure. I'm sorry to hear you can't work right now but atleast you're taking it well.


Alot of programming jobs get outsourced to India. If you could get experience there and move you'd have a higher income potential.


I bet it's frustrating, I hope you heal up soon!

Thanks. I threw up about an hour ago and it wasn't pretty. Luckily no blood

 

[Sensei]

And I feel myself drawing away from this community.

If you don't need this community anymore, that's great news. May I ask, what has changed?

 

[Squiddy]

GUYS GUESS WHAT? All my throwing up caused me to lose 5 pounds! I'll take it

 

[Deleted member 1465]

If you don't need this community anymore, that's great news. May I ask, what has changed?

I wouldn't say I don't need it, I'm just not as invested in it as before. It was a crutch to support myself, then in was place to talk to others who understood. Too many of the friends I was especially close to have gone and it's hard to have the energy to watch it all go around and around in circles again and again.
I've even started to bookmark my own replies to regurgitate them as standard responses to the usual questions. That doesn't feel right.
The more I see of the world in general, the less I feel like expressing an opinion. People have polarised views, I guess that's normal. I don't. That makes me feel alienated here, to an extent, just as I do everywhere else.
I still have people here I care about but I'm also wary of getting too close cuz there is such a high chance of losing them.
And of course there is darkness here.
So I stick around, but I no longer have any expectations.

 

[Sensei]

I wouldn't say I don't need it, I'm just not as invested in it as before. It was a crutch to support myself, then in was place to talk to others who understood. Too many of the friends I was especially close to have gone and it's hard to have the energy to watch it all go around and around in circles again and again.
I've even started to bookmark my own replies to regurgitate them as standard responses to the usual questions. That doesn't feel right.

Then we need to create some original content!

The more I see of the world in general, the less I feel like expressing an opinion. People have polarised views, I guess that's normal. I don't. That makes me feel alienated here, to an extent, just as I do everywhere else.

I know the feeling. It doesn't help that I'm becoming desillusioned an nihilistic too.

I still have people here I care about but I'm also wary of getting too close cuz there is such a high chance of losing them.
And of course there is darkness here.
So I stick around, but I no longer have any expectations.

It's a place of darkness, but also of light. I'm convinced that the overwhelming majority of all forum members never commit suicide. This community keeps them alive until they come out on the other side of depression.

 

[Brick In The Wall]

If you don't need this community anymore, that's great news. May I ask, what has changed?

I agree it is great news when someone is able to heal and move forward. I still miss them though.

I wouldn't say I don't need it, I'm just not as invested in it as before. It was a crutch to support myself, then in was place to talk to others who understood. Too many of the friends I was especially close to have gone and it's hard to have the energy to watch it all go around and around in circles again and again.
I've even started to bookmark my own replies to regurgitate them as standard responses to the usual questions. That doesn't feel right.
The more I see of the world in general, the less I feel like expressing an opinion. People have polarised views, I guess that's normal. I don't. That makes me feel alienated here, to an extent, just as I do everywhere else.
I still have people here I care about but I'm also wary of getting too close cuz there is such a high chance of losing them.
And of course there is darkness here.
So I stick around, but I no longer have any expectations.

It's rough to see so many go and it gets to me at times too. The turnover is so high that many threads get repeated so I understand why you bookmark replies.

I'm glad you still have friends outside of here. Cherish that because it's more valuable than you know!

Then we need to create some original content!



I know the feeling. It doesn't help that I'm becoming desillusioned an nihilistic too.



It's a place of darkness, but also of light. I'm convinced that the overwhelming majority of all forum members never commit suicide. This community keeps them alive until they come out on the other side of depression.

I'm also convinced that more people recover instead of CTB here. Atleast from my experience and observations.

 

[Leech]

Good morning everyone ♡ hope y'alls days go well

 

[Brick In The Wall]

Good morning everyone ♡ hope y'alls days go well

Good morning to ya, I hope you have a good day as well!

 

[RM5998]

Alot of programming jobs get outsourced to India. If you could get experience there and move you'd have a higher income potential.

Yeah, I'll burn that bridge when I get to it. The majority of IT jobs here might as well pay actual peanuts, and moving abroad is going to be difficult thanks to my family. My parents won't even let me work in peace, I'm not sure they'll not just try and attach themselves to me if I get a chance to move elsewhere.

 

[Squiddy]

So I think my psychiatrist has just about given up hope on me. This is a big wake up call for me thinking about it now. He asked me how I'm still benefiting from the hospital program I'm in and I said I thought I was but idk (though I've made it almost 100 days free of self harm) (day 99 today!!! :) )

 

[Brick In The Wall]

So I think my psychiatrist has just about given up hope on me. This is a big wake up call for me thinking about it now. He asked me how I'm still benefiting from the hospital program I'm in and I said I thought I was but idk (though I've made it almost 100 days free of self harm) (day 99 today!!! :) )

That's awesome that you made it so long without self harming, keep it up! Maybe your psychiatrist just wasn't the right one. Because it sounds like you're making progress.

 

[Squiddy]

That's awesome that you made it so long without self harming, keep it up! Maybe your psychiatrist just wasn't the right one. Because it sounds like you're making progress.

I'm not sure if he is or isn't because I've known him since 2015. I feel like it's partially my fault though because I try to take my meds and end up stopping, then end up in the hospital (one big cycle). I really need to break it. (This time I didn't take them because I was throwing up and didn't even eat dinner last night)

 

[Deleted member 1465]

Crap, I've joined a gun forum to try and get their help with my safe and now I have to make 10 posts before i can post a link to a picture. I've browsed all their sub forums and I seriously can't find anything I want to post on. These guys are hardcore survivalists. LOL even their off-topic section is really quite focused on stuff I'd normally stay well clear of.

 

[Brick In The Wall]

Crap, I've joined a gun forum to try and get their help with my safe and now I have to make 10 posts before i can post a link to a picture. I've browsed all their sub forums and I seriously can't find anything I want to post on. These guys are hardcore survivalists. LOL even their off-topic section is really quite focused on stuff I'd normally stay well clear of.

Sounds like an interesting bunch. I remember you bringing this up a few days back. Still haven't found anything to get 10 posts on yet huh? There's not like a bullet counting thread or something stupid?

 

[Squiddy]

Celebrating 100 days of no self harm today. Idk why though, but I'm feeling in the mood to ctb even though I took all my meds yesterday. I guess maybe they need to get back in my system

 

[Brick In The Wall]

Celebrating 100 days of no self harm today. Idk why though, but I'm feeling in the mood to ctb even though I took all my meds yesterday. I guess maybe they need to get back in my system

Congratulations on the 100 day mark! You can't miss any days for the meds to be effective. So you're probably right.

 

[Squiddy]

Congratulations on the 100 day mark! You can't miss any days for the meds to be effective. So you're probably right.

Thanks :) I just hope they get back in my system fast

 

[Brick In The Wall]

Well I've made it through another day!

 

[Squiddy]

Well I've made it through another day!

View attachment 43519

Same. I've thrown up 3 times today. Thinking about driving 8 minutes up the street to get a milkshake. I'm not sure if it'll help my stomach or not