Tell me your problems, why do you want to CTB?

[Meretlein]

I've kind of struggled in life for awhile due to severe OCD and some sort of problem my brain has with processing visual information. These kind of snowballed and made my life unbearable. I was also in an "accident" that caused a ton of physical damage and really threw my life off. I used to be fairly smart, I always did well in school and skipped a grade. But now everything is in the dumps. I don't want to fight tooth and nail to get back all I took for granted. I wanted a different life. Maybe this is very childish of me but idc.

 

[Kikoo Loool]

I suffer since childhood of a light form of autism. Nevertheless I got diplomas and a job, got married and have a kid. I don't know why I want so much to die since I'm a teen.

 

[Its911]

Depression
OCD
A mile long list of chronic illness that suck but don't have the curtesy to be terminal
Debt mainly healthcare related
Chronic never ending soul crushing pain: CRPS the most painful disease known to man
being disabled and 97ish% dependent. I can somewhat feed myself soft hand held food with my left hand only. That and using my phone are my only abilities
forced tapering of meds due to opioid epidemic, leaving me in more pain
hatred of myself
That's the short list. I am full of bitterness and disgust for myself. I cannot keep living this life!

I truly am sorry to hear that, but with such impediments how would it even be possible for you to obtain peace if not by Dignitas?

P.s Dont answer if it makes you uncomfortable.

 

[3cookies]

I truly am sorry to hear that, but with such impediments how would it even be possible for you to obtain peace if not by Dignitas?

P.s Dont answer if it makes you uncomfortable.

I'm not uncomfortable at all. Unfortunately I live in Illinois and we have no such option & im not terminal, So I can't even a move to say Oregon and obtain death with dignity. My diseases while incurable, terrible & life long will not kill me. At least not technically

 

[Its911]

I'm not uncomfortable at all. Unfortunately I live in Illinois and we have no such option & im not terminal, So I can't even a move to say Oregon and obtain death with dignity. My diseases while incurable, terrible & life long will not kill me. At least not technically

Im sorry it must be terrifying to be bound to the shackles of an unwilling body. I hope you find a righteous way to find peace, for those who are not sick make the laws for the ill and bedridden. Im sorry.

 

[seekingoblivion]

I can't get laid in Germany.....or anywhere else for that matter.

 

[Its911]

I can't get laid in Germany.....or anywhere else for that matter.

I would have understood if you said the lack of meaningful relationships or that you will never find true love or something along those lines but, sex?

You can pay for sex... Or make money, study hard get a good job, work out, all those things will help you have sex...

 

[Its911]

I can't get laid in Germany.....or anywhere else for that matter.

Matter a fact come to CUBA no matter how unattractive you may think you are here women will fall to your feet just because your from a diffrent country. Come to cuba and in a week you will have sex for two lifetimes GUARANTEED!

 

[whereisfreedom]

I am sick of my chronic pain.
I am sick of my bad future.
I am sick of docs, the health- and socialsystem in my country.

 

[seekingoblivion]

I would have understood if you said the lack of meaningful relationships or that you will never find true love or something along those lines but, sex?

You can pay for sex... Or make money, study hard get a good job, work out, all those things will help you have sex...

Lol no shit you can pay for sex. I have. Multiple times. Once you nut you realize what a worthless thing it is. But of course you go back cause you gotta nut and you're tired of doing it to yourself. And of course I feel that way about never finding true love or a meaningful relationship. But the fact is non of it matters. Neither relationships nor sex. And that's why I actually wanna die. Cause everything good or bad is ultimately pointless. The feeling of absolute excitement I used to get everytime I picked up my guitar (the one thing I've consistently felt good about for the past decade) is now gone cause of that simple realization. The absurdity of everyday life struggling to keep alive a life that will be lost regardless of whether or not we want it to. There's a lot of details with regards to that to go over but ultimately I just don't feel like life is really worth anything. I just mentioned the getting laid in Germany cause Rammstein wrote a nice song and I thought it'd be funny to reference it in such a thread as this.

 

[seekingoblivion]

Matter a fact come to CUBA no matter how unattractive you may think you are here women will fall to your feet just because your from a diffrent country. Come to cuba and in a week you will have sex for two lifetimes GUARANTEED!

Well......i have heard one or two wonderful things about the women of Cuba. Perhaps I might take up your invite.

 

[Its911]

Lol no shit you can pay for sex. I have. Multiple times. Once you nut you realize what a worthless thing it is. But of course you go back cause you gotta nut and you're tired of doing it to yourself. And of course I feel that way about never finding true love or a meaningful relationship. But the fact is non of it matters. Neither relationships nor sex. And that's why I actually wanna die. Cause everything good or bad is ultimately pointless. The feeling of absolute excitement I used to get everytime I picked up my guitar (the one thing I've consistently felt good about for the past decade) is now gone cause of that simple realization. The absurdity of everyday life struggling to keep alive a life that will be lost regardless of whether or not we want it to. There's a lot of details with regards to that to go over but ultimately I just don't feel like life is really worth anything. I just mentioned the getting laid in Germany cause Rammstein wrote a nice song and I thought it'd be funny to reference it in such a thread as this.

Ohh rammstein right sorry i dont like german folk music lol jk i know who they are...but yea you should come to cuba, this place is LOADED and in my experiences cuban women are among the best in bed. Just saying... That salsa does something to the hips.

 

[DrownedOctopus]

I don't really have problems.
It's kind of like a lack of will to live.
I honestly can look at my life and see all the blessings, but I have no desire. I have to force myself into doing things even if I find them enjoyable. Even doing things I want take so much out of me, and in the end when I've done it I'm so exhausted mentally that I don't even care about it anymore. I just want to stop existing, I feel like a complete waste of a person.

 

[seekingoblivion]

. Just saying... That salsa does something to the hips.

Yep.... That's what I heard lol.

 

[Redt2go]

because life is pointless and stupid. There is no purpose in suffering. No greater meaning. It's all just pointless.

By the way my life is shit(don't want to go into detail with that). I've never really been happy and even if I was I can't unsee what I've seen. People live because of ignorance. They ignore all the suffering in the world. They are biological machines programmed to survive and procreate.

I can not cope with the fact that we all might just be biological machines.
All of our emotions are just chemicals. I wish there was something immaterial about us but so far there's never been any proof for that. So....

There's been proof of people having souls... I forget the study but there was a loss of mass after death... I'll find it for you

 

[wishfulthinking]

I am sick of my chronic pain.
I am sick of my bad future.
I am sick of docs, the health- and socialsystem in my country.

Same here...

 

[littlepillbox]

I'm gay. I Knew it from a very young age. Not a very unique or interesting story, but here it goes: I must have been about 10 or 11 when I realized that I was attracted to boys rather than girls, men rather than women. Although philosophically, I have made peace with this fact, and have since lost my faith entirely, I still find that I hate who I am, and I know it will never change. Only way I will ever rid myself of self-loathing is to erase myself from the planet. I'm not looking for pity, I'm just telling it like it is.

I assume you're not from the US?

 

[Kikoo Loool]

There's been proof of people having souls... I forget the study but there was a loss of mass after death... I'll find it for you

21 g ?

 

[Redt2go]

21 g ?

Something like that I read it a long time ago

 

[futur]

There's been proof of people having souls... I forget the study but there was a loss of mass after death... I'll find it for you

man, i didn't see this study but it looks like a bs, honestly. In theory even after death metabolic processes continue for a short time, metabolic processes mean some heat and to produce heat you need to degrade something. And there is also a perspiration. And when should we state death to measure lost of the soul: when the hear has stopped, when the breathing has stoppt, when there is no electrical activity in the brain?

I've been going to drs for years wtf do they know they just make shit worse and worse and worse

totally agree. I think that psychiatry is not a real medical branch. The most psychiaters claim the opposite, of course, they even took a somatic disease model for a mental illnesses.
but the whole treatment consists in the fact that sooner or later they combine all the very modest gifts of the pharmaceutical industry without much hope that something will help. You have depression, here's your first anti-depressant, here's your replacement anti-depressant. Did not help? Here's an atypical neuroleptic? Does not help? Here's an anticonvulsant? Still bad? Here is lithium, here is thyroxin, here is ketamine. And in addition we will try shock therapy.

It reminds me of the fact that only 80 years ago a lobotomy was regularly performed and syphilis was treated with mercury. I guess that again after 80 years the people will look at the modern psychiatry in same way as we see the past of medicine now.


I can see that many people stated in this thread a social isolation. Earlier i thought that i am depressive because i have illness but now it is clear for me, that the roots of such state is the loneliness and inability to communicate unformal with the people. We are still anymals and moreover we are social anymals. If our social nature is deprived most of us will feel bad. And after long enough time it will come to "groundless" depression.

 

[Void115]

Why do you want to CTB?

Because i m just tired, i had an awful life and things were going better the last year, but now i m losing everything litheraly. My dreams are just fucked up, i m just sick of this shit. Also i hate humans and i hope they will disappear as soon as possible, me at first. Yeah i m so fucking nihilistic

 

[littlepillbox]

There's a saying, "If you smell shit everywhere, check your own shoes."
I've been suicidal since age 9, first attempting at 12. Inpatient has been a revolving door since 18. I've tried a number of medications, all of which made things worse (including Paxil, which gave me seizures). I nearly died last year from another medical issue, and instead of it instilling a yen for life, made me more sure that my life should end. I don't know what it's like to go more than a day without wishing I was dead, and considering I've given up on being able to function in normal society, and it's better for everyone financially and emotionally to not drag things out longer than absolutely necessary.
Besides, partying is the only thing that helps me forget and it's starting to bore me, and I don't know of anyone outside myself that wants to self-destruct.

 

[Pepega]

If someone would hug me and comfort me once in a while, I wouldn't want to die. The fact that nobody is wiling to do that is proof positive that I should be dead.

I feel you soo much, I never even hug someone, I don't know how it feels, I have a constant need to hug someone

 

[Xaphous]

Isolated, single, jobless + depression, anxiety, avpd, no good past memories and no future ahead of me. Just constant suffering. The isolation keeps me mentally ill.

 

[Pepega]

Isolated, single, jobless + depression, anxiety, avpd, no good past memories and no future ahead of me. Just constant suffering. The isolation keeps me mentally ill.

Believe me it's good you don't have good past memories, I's only gonna make you sadder and harder to CTB