Random thoughts

[Halo13]

Oh shit,that aint good..Then your left with a headache AND the sickness! Had that problem a few times myself in the past.Dang tricky liquor shots,their like potato chips."You cant have just one!"

Haha exactly. Made my body sore too because I drank the whole bottle - though some say things like tequila and strong booze in general help when you're sick because it clears the sinuses and knocks you out. I had a goofy doctor years ago ask "why aren't you at home getting drunk? I sure would be if I was that sick!" He wasn't serious, I don't think...

 

[Morphinekiss]

4 long fucking years.

 

[thatguyakira123]

It's 2:15am. I start my new job 5 hours and 45 mins from now. I was supposed to get up 4 hours and 15 mins from now but my anxiety is saying otherwise. What's the point of having a brain that over thinks and a heart that races. It's like an extra fuck you from the world.

 

[Epsilon0]

Tastes are different, but my favourite is "Master and Margarita". It is just something more than a masterpiece for me. That is a call of eternity.

I read Bulgakov a long time ago. I recall it equally moved and entertained me more than anything I had laid eyes on before. The dust of time has settled on my mind since then. All I remember from that book now is some hazy scene with a devil and a streetcar.

 

[SuicideBoys93]

I've had few thoughts lately. I wonder if my inner self warned me prior to being totally engulfed in what I am today? Like do you think there's a point in life that you could of somehow avoided this path? I tend to think about when it all started, and if I avoided emotions I shouldn't of, because I have zero idea when I got on this ride. Second, what tools do other people use to cope? I found that I write pretty much randomly of what I currently think. Doesn't have to be constrictive or, grammatically correct. I literally vomit my thoughts either on the documents app on my phone, or in a notebook. Keeps mind busy, and found beneficial. I eventually want to learn how to construct this into a book of my raw emotions, and mind. This was last night, and actually thought damn, you may be onto something.

 

[mattwitt]

My 2 fortune cookies from yesterday.

"Now is the time to try something new" & "Repetition is the mother of skill"

 

[Worthless_nobody]

I cannot believe a year ago today I joined this site. I wish I could be a recovery or success story...but I'm not. I'm still here in limbo but probably closer to ctb. My method is ready I'm just biding time.

 

[Halo13]

I cannot believe a year ago today I joined this site. I wish I could be a recovery or success story...but I'm not. I'm still here in limbo but probably closer to ctb. My method is ready I'm just biding time.

I was just thinking how I've already been on here 9 months and didn't expect to be. It's sort of like an anniversary or something.

 

[listeningpost1379]

i can't help but feel like a zoo animal when people like me. i dont know what makes others find me interesting but i hate it

 

[Epsilon0]

It would be so nice to be able to take off myself, in the same way one takes off a coat.

Oh... to be able to exist without the armor and prison that I am to myself.

 

[mesohappy]

I never thought I would see the day when I would be more happy about taking a nice,smooth crap,than the prospect of having sex.

 

[Epsilon0]

The height of despair is the despair at being myself while not knowing what the self is.

 

[notjustyetagain]

there's a light at the end of the tunnel. it's a glaring fluorescent sign:

TUNNEL CLOSED INDEFINITELY​

 

[Sabriel]

I have a dog and I go to therapy and do TMS treatments and I'm on three different medications...but I know I'll never fully be alright until the day that I die.

 

[Halo13]

So sick of being sick.

 

[Anomaly]

I feel like a character in a Tsai Ming-Liang film.

 

[a.n.kirillov]

The gruel realization that as soon as elementary school you can mostly tell who's gonna be successful in life and who won't. I could never be a teacher.

 

[Epsilon0]

there's a light at the end of the tunnel. it's a glaring fluorescent sign:

TUNNEL CLOSED INDEFINITELY​

The light at the end of the tunnel is actually an oncoming train!

 

[Carrotcake]

I feel so tired and out of it.. and more impulsive than usual.

I was looking at old pictures and it's so painful to see how I used to have an actual life.

 

[Nunyabinniss]

I feel so tired and out of it.. and more impulsive than usual.

I was looking at old pictures and it's so painful to see how I used to have an actual life.

I feel you.I'm in the same situation. I miss having a life. I miss friends but my god life simply fell apart for many friends of mine and myself nearly simultaneously. It's been hard.I wake up everyday with the worst outlook and attitude just wanting to die. I need a community, need a purpose, really need help.

I have a dog and I go to therapy and do TMS treatments and I'm on three different medications...but I know I'll never fully be alright until the day that I die.

Does therapy help you at all?

 

[mesohappy]

Well I got another loose and painful tooth Im going to have to pull..Its funny I was born into this world with no teeth and at this rate,looks like I may leave this world with no teeth..Periodontal disease and life can kiss my ass anyway.

 

[GinaIsReady]

It is better to be betrayed than not to trust, better to be disappointed than not to love. Pamela Anderson.

 

[Nunyabinniss]

I wish I could override me Survivisl instinct

 

[Halo13]

Well I got another loose and painful tooth Im going to have to pull..Its funny I was born into this world with no teeth and at this rate,looks like I may leave this world with no teeth..Periodontal disease and life can kiss my ass anyway.

Dental problems are so terrible, sorry you're going through that. I hope you don't mean you'll be pulling it yourself because a dry socket is like torture level pain.

 

[mesohappy]

Dental problems are so terrible, sorry you're going through that. I hope you don't mean you'll be pulling it yourself because a dry socket is like torture level pain.

Pulled it myself a couple hours after that post yesterday.(such a relief,eating much better!)Sucks not to have insurance or $.Just got back from the county offices to apply for some assistance.Hopefully things will get better.

 

[Halo13]

Pulled it myself a couple hours after that post yesterday.(such a relief,eating much better!)Sucks not to have insurance or $.Just got back from the county offices to apply for some assistance.Hopefully things will get better.

Wow that's pretty brave but I understand also - I wanted to pry out one of my impacted and infected molars several years ago because it hurt so bad but had no insurance. In some places there are emergency dentists in the hospital that will yank a tooth ASAP if it's badly infected regardless of insurance...or so I've been told - they'd never do it for me, just antibiotics and tell me to see a dentist, I'd say I can't afford it, rinse, repeat. I really hope you're able to get some assistance!! Vanilla ice cream helps with numbing, give it a try

 

[Carrotcake]

Had an appointment with a psychiatrist and honestly every time I just end up leaving more confused than I was before. I don't understand anything and it all doesn't make sense.

 

[maka]

Another kid was killed today at my school. That's the fourth one. I feel horrible for wishing it was me instead of them, and I can't help but feel sorry for their parents. He was getting ready for prom, for graduation, just to get killed be someone in the heat of the moment. And the killer could be anyone in this building is the thing. My heart is breaking for him and his family. This county, this city, this state, and this country are all fucked.

 

[Halo13]

Another kid was killed today at my school. That's the fourth one. I feel horrible for wishing it was me instead of them, and I can't help but feel sorry for their parents. He was getting ready for prom, for graduation, just to get killed be someone in the heat of the moment. And the killer could be anyone in this building is the thing. My heart is breaking for him and his family. This county, this city, this state, and this country are all fucked.

Wow, that's really scary. I can't even imagine being in school with all the violence and shootings now. I hope you are safe

 

[Nunyabinniss]

I feel you.I'm in the same situation. I miss having a life. I miss friends but my god life simply fell apart for many friends of mine and myself nearly simultaneously. It's been hard.I wake up everyday with the worst outlook and attitude just wanting to die. I need a community, need a purpose, really need help.

Does therapy help you at all?

Oh goddess no therapy hasn't ever been helpful. What is TMH?

Another kid was killed today at my school. That's the fourth one. I feel horrible for wishing it was me instead of them, and I can't help but feel sorry for their parents. He was getting ready for prom, for graduation, just to get killed be someone in the heat of the moment. And the killer could be anyone in this building is the thing. My heart is breaking for him and his family. This county, this city, this state, and this country are all fucked.

Damn what school do you go to?!?! Wow that's wild where the hell in the world is this happening