Xe-
Seems better than Tinder
- Jul 29, 2024
- 25
I have wanted to walk the train tracks nearby. I don't actually do it. I need familiarity or it just won't work for my brain to think of survival, but I can't survive in the fish bowl I grew up living in. I feel bitter in life. Homelessness and being a woman has made me feel this way. Being kicked in my face as a homeless woman has made it stronger.
I saw someone post something on here about being bitter while catching the bus. I didn't actually read it. I didn't want to think that introspectively on the subject of self-formed death. I wouldn't know how I will feel during my last moments. I have a knowing of this day, from my own hand and I suppose I would only feel bitter about the cards life gave to me.
I don't know these slang terms and I guess I will learn only for the sake of being apart of something. I feel that learning any new language/slang when I am certain I want to leave this world does feed a habit formed as so by making a living connection into this world.
ie: there becomes a hope to find connection in a cruel world, which means a survival instinct grows stronger from a subconscious level. Connection and social accounts seem to give off an obscured vision that even fake and deceptive encounters would magically solve everything in life.
I have come to terms that the meaning of life is: true connection as a leveled understanding passed along in an accepting way - this I have never have.
I have always wanted to ctb.
I saw someone post something on here about being bitter while catching the bus. I didn't actually read it. I didn't want to think that introspectively on the subject of self-formed death. I wouldn't know how I will feel during my last moments. I have a knowing of this day, from my own hand and I suppose I would only feel bitter about the cards life gave to me.
I don't know these slang terms and I guess I will learn only for the sake of being apart of something. I feel that learning any new language/slang when I am certain I want to leave this world does feed a habit formed as so by making a living connection into this world.
ie: there becomes a hope to find connection in a cruel world, which means a survival instinct grows stronger from a subconscious level. Connection and social accounts seem to give off an obscured vision that even fake and deceptive encounters would magically solve everything in life.
I have come to terms that the meaning of life is: true connection as a leveled understanding passed along in an accepting way - this I have never have.
I have always wanted to ctb.
