
littlelady774
running on empty
- Dec 20, 2018
- 708
The amount of people viewing this thread… holy shit.
total: 421 (members: 66, guests: 355)
total: 421 (members: 66, guests: 355)
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This is the same asshole who came here and blamed us for @SpentStardust committing suicide. He's an attention whore who wants views. He doesn't give a damn about anyone on this site, or @SpentStardust.
Almost there. Was hoping to be dead before then though lolI'm pretty sure they only allow people who are 50+ onto those forums. I don't know if they require an ID of some kind but I believe they do, counting I haven't seen anyone under 50 on the forums here state that they have access to it. but it's also possible they haven't tried.
Ok, say we take all those suggestions to heart.I know I probably have the unpopular stance here, but I don't think all of the points he made in his video are invalid. Do I agree with everything? Absolutely not. Do I agree with how he's handling most of this, as in the way he introduces the information to the viewer and his solutions for some of the problems? No.
Does the fact I have to add a bunch of disclaimers to my statement of "I have a slight differing view to most people here" due to the anxiety of being dogpiled for just stating that - display that the site possibly, maybe, sorta kinda, has an echo chamber of sorts? Perhaps.
I agree that the mindset of "don't seek help" is an actual issue on the website. It's also an issue I deal with. When he mentioned how there was a person who commented on S64's thread saying if they want help, they should get it, but then adding a follow-up to "balance" the thread almost - It's something I've done quite a bit - both in DMs and in posts. I already know everyone's reasons for why that is, and it's not that I don't sympathize with why that's an issue on here - it still doesn't change my view that maybe it should be something we as active users could put some effort into working on.
Ignoring the video itself - because it's quite clear the creator has some kind of history on the website and that lore makes it complicated to view this video as a whole (As I don't have that history with this creator, I mainly viewed it as an outsider) - I do think we could take some of the points from the video and as a community discuss in depth about these issues. Without this creator's input being an influencing factor of that.
Ok, say we take all those suggestions to heart.
Will there ever be a place for everyone to congregate who is beyond "help?"
When will our efforts to improve be enough?
Where do the people go who have explored all the ways of helping oneself yet they still want to ctb?
I know I probably have the unpopular stance here, but I don't think all of the points he made in his video are invalid. Do I agree with everything? Absolutely not. Do I agree with how he's handling most of this, as in the way he introduces the information to the viewer and his solutions for some of the problems? No.
Does the fact I have to add a bunch of disclaimers to my statement of "I have a slight differing view to most people here" due to the anxiety of being dogpiled for just stating that - display that the site possibly, maybe, sorta kinda, has an echo chamber of sorts? Perhaps.
I agree that the mindset of "don't seek help" is an actual issue on the website. It's also an issue I deal with. When he mentioned how there was a person who commented on S64's thread saying if they want help, they should get it, but then adding a follow-up to "balance" the thread almost - It's something I've done quite a bit - both in DMs and in posts. I already know everyone's reasons for why that is, and it's not that I don't sympathize with why that's an issue on here - it still doesn't change my view that maybe it should be something we as active users could put some effort into working on.
Ignoring the video itself - because it's quite clear the creator has some kind of history on the website and that lore makes it complicated to view this video as a whole (As I don't have that history with this creator, I mainly viewed it as an outsider) - I do think we could take some of the points from the video and as a community discuss in depth about these issues. Without this creator's input being an influencing factor of that.
I agree with both of you. I think we should be better at not just outright encouraging. But we also need to listen when people have exhausted all their options. Someone who's in their mid 40s and who has dealt with mental health issues for that long has probably exhausted all options available.Ok, say we take all those suggestions to heart.
Will there ever be a place for everyone to congregate who is beyond "help?"
When will our efforts to improve be enough?
Where do the people go who have explored all the ways of helping oneself, yet they still want to ctb?
I agree with both of you. I think we should be better at not just outright encouraging. But we also need to listen when people have exhausted all their options. Someone who's in their mid 40s and who has dealt with mental health issues for that long has probably exhausted all options available.
You 18 year olds who want to off themselves, listen. Give yourself some time to find you. There is always another day. You don't have to do anything drastic today. And if you find yourself in your mid 40s because you got caught up in life for a bit, that is ok. The pain can be temporary. Or it can be permanent. Give yourself a few years to find out. Tomorrow is always another day that you can off yourself if it gets too bad. But give yourself a chance. Even if it's only for 1 more day.
Videos such as the one from The Perverted Puppy Killer on YouTube assumes that members don't know what they want and need to be dissuaded from their thoughts of suicide.I suppose I don't get the questions. I still think this website should exist - The people who are "beyond help" would come here, I would assume. Isn't that the point of the site?
Personal improvement and what is deemed as "exploring all of the options" is up to the individual and what their treatment plan calls for. It's the person's choice, really - as I'm still "pro choice". I wouldn't be here if I wasn't pro choice.
I think the problem lies within the fault of how everyone needs to state everything wrong with getting help to every person who might be on the fence about it, instead of putting their emotions aside to give people informed choices about what is open to them. In this thread, someone had asked about going to the ER. I was honest in my response. I told them how they can do it and what would most likely happen. I told them a big possibility is they'd be sent to an inpatient program - which is a lot of people's fears here - I gave them the information they asked for without diluting it with my personal stance on it.
I don't think that was too hard of me to do. I was honest and said I've been to some fucked up places, but that it will depend on your personal experience. It's not hard to do, I don't feel like.
This guy (who created the video) actually created an account and was here. This is his thread: https://sanctioned-suicide.net/thre...time-about-the-death-of-spentstardust.103970/
I watched enough of his goofy video to see the part where he was quick to absolve himself of any blame. Then proceeded to blame everyone else.Yes.
That's where I posted / pasted SpentStardust / System64 's YouTube excerpts of his alarming red flags and cries for help.
'Tantacruel / Jonels', et al — claimed "he knew the boy" — yet managed to turn a blind eye for 2 long years — probably painfully so for SpentStardust / S64.
Then rushed to blame this site — instead of his own failure to act and 'save the boy's life' — is disgracefully hypocritical.
Videos such as the one from The Perverted Puppy Killer on YouTube assumes that members don't know what they want and need to be dissuaded from their thoughts of suicide.
How and why do they arrive at this conclusion? Why are people like him (and people who agree with him) incapable of taking comments at face value?
If someone says they want to die, where does he get off disagreeing with them?
If people are on the fence, they will tell you.
If people want your advice about staying alive, they will ask you.
Otherwise, STFU (Not talking about you, per se).
I haven't read the posts you've specifically linked, but my issue (in general) is what makes one think the posts aren't "informed" to begin with?I don't know anything about that creator or their videos, so I can't really say much about it.
(This response is unrelated to that creator or their videos)
I think sometimes, as users, we get mixed up in our own views that sometimes we forget that some people aren't viewing the situation through the same lens as ours. If someone has bluntly said "I don't want advice" or they're asking a direct question - then it's the respectful thing to respond to their question(s) without derailing the thread about personal beliefs of whether or not they should do it. In this thread, someone asked about the storage of SN. My responses were just focused on the actual question. I didn't state my personal beliefs of whether or not they should do something.
Some people just told them "You shouldn't premix it" after a user said they probably should. In my response, I said you should find out why people are saying that before making a choice. In this instance, I provided information I understood or knew at the time. I didn't talk them out of their choice in general to CTB - My response was solely educational because they had asked a specific question.
I guess that's my point. It's about providing information so the person in the thread can MAKE AN INFORMED CHOICE. And, in my opinion, an "informed choice" means addressing possible options and alternatives. It's not about telling people what to do, it's about sometimes putting your emotions aside to actually address an OP and their overall choices. If people had derailed the thread about storing SN with comments like "Yeah, I wouldn't do it. It didn't work out for me. I really fuckin' hated it, too." - Then that feels pretty shitty, doesn't it? Why isn't the topic of medical treatment treated the same as every other "educational" post on here?
Derailing the thread about your experience, without explaining why it was shitty or what happened - it's pretty damn useless advice at that point, isn't it? What's a better option - providing an educational response, or an emotional one? Which one helps the author of the thread?
(General "you" here. I wasn't addressing you directly if I said "you", so sorry if there's a misunderstanding with that!)
I haven't read the posts you've specifically linked, but my issue (in general) is what makes one think the posts aren't "informed" to begin with?
I'm not referring to anything you've posted, but the overall POV of the Tarantula video.
What did he say that we need to take into consideration and WHY should we take it into consideration?
You originally said we should "put effort" into some of the things he suggested and my response is WHY and how do you know effort wasn't already put forward by the poster(s)?
How do you determine that enough "effort" has been exerted?
I watched nearly the whole video and I honestly don't like it. What is worse is the fact that he is one of the more bigger content creators out there. That means if more content creators find this video, they might make more videos about this site, which is the thing that worries me the most.
I think the main point I agree with is the unanimous (at least it seems that way) view among most posters to accept a user's decision to CTB as a valid one.
Of course, it's almost impossible to know an individual's situation, especially when in most cases on the forum it's rarely given, but I'm very skeptical about giving direct advice or actively encouraging people that the decision to CTB is the correct one, unless you know them and their reasons very well.
Personally, and this is likely to be unpopular and it's just a wild guess, but I'd wager that that vast majority of people on this forum could benefit from external sources of help and that CTB is not their only option. There's thousands and thousands of people that visit this forum daily, and a very small minority actively CTB. This isn't to suggest that anyone in particular is making a bad decision, but just that most the majority of people who end up on this forum are unlikely (just purely speaking out of the vast numbers of active registered users) to ever make the final decision to end their life, suggesting that for a very real, large contingent of people who may access information here they don't actually CTB. While you can argue that in the grand scheme of things people who do commit may have more 'valid' intentions as opposed to those who don't, it does raise the question as to how many people are misdirected and make the 'wrong' decision when other means might still be available to help them.
Apart from that I have a lot of other grudges with the video but I guess they've been mostly highlighted in this thread already.
How do you know that's not already happening?...My argument is simple, really. It's a notice to people, especially active users, to just think about their responses more and take the time to take into consideration how your response effects the author of the thread...
How do you know that's not already happening?
It sounds like you're saying that because the responses aren't what YOU deem appropriate, then the replies aren't considerate.
Ahhh I see now. You're one of those members with special glasses. When you view the board, you see an abundance of people encouraging others to commit suicide.What? I feel like you don't understand, or maybe I'm not understanding what you're saying.
Yes, it's my personal opinion. The video creator said that there's a problem where people overly encourage people to commit suicide on this website. I agree that most of the time as the default response to everything on this website is, yeah, overly encouraging.
If you have a problem with that assessment, then it sounds like you take part in that issue. I've never, in my life, seen someone defend telling people to commit suicide as hard as some people on this website. I thought we were meant to be a support community - to help people who are in need - not telling everyone to off themselves. If what a person needs to do is to end their lives, then it's their choice. You can be comforting, you can be supportive, you can be helpful and provide information. Do you really need to tell them to just do it, though?
Just because everyone here is completely desensitized to the concept of death doesn't mean it's the ideology you should push onto other people, especially if they're open-minded to other choices. I thought it was our job to SUPPORT EACH OTHER, in WHATEVER CHOICE THEY MAKE, not our job to persuade people to making a choice you would make.
If you cannot simply comprehend the differences being supportive and coaxing someone into doing something, then that is not my job to educate you on that. You and everyone else can keep making any kinds of replies you guys want to make, as long as they follow the website's terms of service. That's kind of the cool thing about forums is you get a lot of perspectives (most of the time) from all kinds of different people. Not really in this case, but, y'know.
But, yeah, in my personal opinion, people should be more considerate when replying. I'm sorry if that's a bit of a hot take to have.
Ahhh I see now. You're one of those members with special glasses. When you view the board, you see an abundance of people encouraging others to commit suicide.
I don't have a pair of those glasses so that's not what I see.
I just wanted to know why you think Tarantula's ramblings had any validity and where do people go when they're beyond help.Unironically confused here. My entire argument is it's my personal opinion on my personal experience on this forum. I'm glad you have your own experience which differs from mine, it's really awesome that two people can view the same situation differently and come to different conclusions. It's the awesome thing about being your own person with your own lived experiences.
At this point, we're debating whether or not one experience is more valid than the other. Both of our views are valid. If you disagree with what I said, then you can just simply not do the advice I offered in the posts. If someone here DOES agree with what I said and took it into account, then it's their choice to make that change (or not).
I'm glad we've come to the conclusion that we just have different experiences, but I guess we both disagree on what makes that valid or not. I guess you think my experience is invalid, while I think yours is valid? I guess I don't understand your response. (Genuinely asking)
I don't know if we can reasonably expect that kind of professionalism from a group of individuals of various ages, backgrounds, and written communication skills who have self-selected for various ranges of mental illness. That's especially true when discussing interactions with different mental health systems, where much of the userbase has self-selected for negative experiences.But in general. When people ask a question, when referring to medical treatment of most kinds, I feel like it's people's habit to derail the thread to state their personal opinions on the matter and not actually help the author in any meaningful manner. If someone states "I'm scared to go to therapy, I don't want to be hospitalized!" - You want to know what most people will most likely respond with? "You shouldn't go to therapy because they WILL hospitalize you", or state about how they hated therapy, or state how you can't trust anyone in this world and you can only trust yourself, and that you shouldn't involve other people into your suicide plans because if you do they'll stop you, etc.