Method My new suicide plan

[Webcore]

I plan to kill myself tomorrow morning while my dad is gone to work
my mother is out of town, and wont be around to suddenly pop in to check on me
My poor father spent tonight trying to comfort me and tell me I would be okay in the long run
I had a serious awful anxiety spike about the Iran War and now I just cant feel any sort of way that I will be alright

Im terrified of losing my loved ones in war, Im terrified of the prolonged panic of a bomb dropping.
So I'm going to take myself out tomorrow instead. I plan to take a knife to my throat and just keep going until I cant possibly be alive anymore. Ill cut my wrists and arms if I have to for added assurance.

I dont care about the pain anymore, I just want to go. Spare myself a worse fate. I want to believe I will be okay, and live a happy good life. I am on medication at the moment, fluoxetine that was suppose to manage my anxiety but then why did this happen? Why did I have a flare-up so awful?
I dont want to hurt my family, I dont want to hurt my poor daddy or my mom. I dont want to hurt my friends but I cant bear the idea of losing them all in a horrible war.

Ive ran into this before, but now I am fully committed. I plan to write a suicide note and use tonight to prepare while my dad is away at work.

 

[cowlover1252]

I hope you find peace

 

[unluckysadness]

I plan to take a knife to my throat and just keep going until I cant possibly be alive anymore. Ill cut my wrists and arms if I have to for added assurance.

I'm sorry for your suffering but this is a very very bad idea. if you do it, your anxiety will rise like never before and you'll just end up in hospital and then in psych ward. Do you live in Iran ? Fluoxetine is not strong enough for anxiety. I took this med but you need to take a strong benzo like Xanax, Valium or Lexomil. Please ask your doctor. And don't try this method, please. I don't judge you because I'm aslo highly suicidal, but cutting your throat or wrists in one of most violent and painful death. Please take care. We are here if you need to talk

 

[DeathSweetDeath]

That is #3 on the list of non-methods linked below, so please do not. There's also a lengthy post somewhere here by someone who tried this & only ended up in the hospital, and after a long recovery, they CTB'd with SN. You'll save yourself a hospital stay & a lot of pain & misery by staying away from this non-method. Your meds may be making you feel suicidal, or may be making your suicidal ideation worse, so talk to your doctor.

Non-methods that should not be attempted

mod note: this has been added to the suicide resource compilation at the top. This has been made in response to the ever increasing amount of posts made about highly unlikely methods. Please read before posting about one of these methods or feel free to link if someone does post about them...

sanctioned-suicide.net

 

[Webcore]

I don't care any more about a violent or painful death I just need to die

I'm sorry for your suffering but this is a very very bad idea. if you do it, your anxiety will rise like never before and you'll just end up in hospital and then in psych ward. Do you live in Iran ? Fluoxetine is not strong enough for anxiety. I took this med but you need to take a strong benzo like Xanax, Valium or Lexomil. Please ask your doctor. And don't try this method, please. I don't judge you because I'm aslo highly suicidal, but cutting your throat or wrists in one of most violent and painful death. Please take care. We are here if you need to talk

I do not live in Iran, I live in the US

 

[unluckysadness]

I don't care any more about a violent or painful death I just need to die

I do not live in Iran, I live in the US

If Iran tries to lauch a single bomb againt US, Iran will be totally destroyed. They will never do it. I cannot imagine this scenario one second, but I have some paranoia too so I understand your anxiety. Mainstream medias are guilty because they increase the anxiety of the population. That said, I hope you'll find peace whatever happens.

 

[peacebenow]

You are safe. Your loved ones are safe. A bomb is not dropping. Keep repeating this to yourself. Keep breathing.

 

[balladeer]

I lived there my entire life and have gotten pretty desensitized to everything after a bit. I've heard so many terrifyingly loud bombs, drones and gunshot..etc. hell, even our whole house was shaking during the war lol I promise you're gonna be fine

All I can say is that you should not pay attention to fake media, at the end of the day that's what they try to do since it's their job. I can 100% promise you that nothing is going to happen.

 

[Webcore]

I plan to kill myself tomorrow morning while my dad is gone to work
my mother is out of town, and wont be around to suddenly pop in to check on me
My poor father spent tonight trying to comfort me and tell me I would be okay in the long run
I had a serious awful anxiety spike about the Iran War and now I just cant feel any sort of way that I will be alright

Im terrified of losing my loved ones in war, Im terrified of the prolonged panic of a bomb dropping.
So I'm going to take myself out tomorrow instead. I plan to take a knife to my throat and just keep going until I cant possibly be alive anymore. Ill cut my wrists and arms if I have to for added assurance.

I dont care about the pain anymore, I just want to go. Spare myself a worse fate. I want to believe I will be okay, and live a happy good life. I am on medication at the moment, fluoxetine that was suppose to manage my anxiety but then why did this happen? Why did I have a flare-up so awful?
I dont want to hurt my family, I dont want to hurt my poor daddy or my mom. I dont want to hurt my friends but I cant bear the idea of losing them all in a horrible war.

Ive ran into this before, but now I am fully committed. I plan to write a suicide note and use tonight to prepare while my dad is away at work.

It's now the morning and I am still alive
I think the worst of my attack has passed

I still feel jittery and scared, but less ready to CTB

 

[MatiSendiri]

It's now the morning and I am still alive
I think the worst of my attack has passed

I still feel jittery and scared, but less ready to CTB

Glad you're still here. Cutting yourself is not a viable method at all.

Honestly if you want to talk you can chat here man. We're here to help.

 

[hlchoo]

Glad to hear that... calm down. Anxiety is very treatable. Try control your breath when anxiety spike.

 

[bl33ding_heart]

Aww I'm so sorry you have suffered so much. I hope you're able to finally be at ease.

 

[Webcore]

I honestly have no idea what happened last night
My anxiety just spiked and I had a break in reality
I really hope I can get better soon, Im already on medication, so Im honestly scared now if its working anymore

 

[MatiSendiri]

I honestly have no idea what happened last night
My anxiety just spiked and I had a break in reality
I really hope I can get better soon, Im already on medication, so Im honestly scared now if its working anymore

Can I ask what medication do you take right now? I think that type of acute panic attack needs some heavy medications

 

[Webcore]

Can I ask what medication do you take right now? I think that type of acute panic attack needs some heavy medications

I take fluoxetine, 20 mg

 

[MatiSendiri]

I take fluoxetine, 20 mg

Sorry man, that shit is not enough for this situation. Sorry that you're in this situation

 

[Webcore]

Sorry man, that shit is not enough for this situation. Sorry that you're in this situation

the thing is I've had a long standing panic attack before about Iran
I went through the exact same thing, the panic, the mental break, the plan for CTB
and thats when I first got on my medication again, and I was doing great

I've been on fluoxetine since middleschool its always been enough

 

[hlchoo]

I take fluoxetine, 20 mg

I am not a doctor. Fluoxetine (SSRI) alone may not be sufficient. It is better you consult a psychiatrist doctor.
i have anxiety disorder and currently taking duloxetine (SNRI), Xanax and Olanzapine, all prescribed by psychiatrist doctor.

 

[MatiSendiri]

the thing is I've had a long standing panic attack before about Iran
I went through the exact same thing, the panic, the mental break, the plan for CTB
and thats when I first got on my medication again, and I was doing great

I've been on fluoxetine since middleschool its always been enough

No medication for your panic attack or suicidal ideation? I'd expect at least an antipsychotic since what you experienced yesterday.

I am not a doctor. Fluoxetine (SSRI) alone may not be sufficient. It is better you consult a psychiatrist doctor.
i have anxiety disorder and currently taking duloxetine (SNRI), Xanax and Olanzapine, all prescribed by psychiatrist doctor.

Yeah just like this guy gets

I am not a doctor. Fluoxetine (SSRI) alone may not be sufficient. It is better you consult a psychiatrist doctor.
i have anxiety disorder and currently taking duloxetine (SNRI), Xanax and Olanzapine, all prescribed by psychiatrist doctor.

Yeah just like this guy gets

 

[Webcore]

No medication for your panic attack or suicidal ideation? I'd expect at least an antipsychotic since what you experienced yesterday.

Yeah just like this guy gets

The fluoxetine IS for the panic attacks, and I always assumed that the suicidal aspect was part of the panic attac symptoms. I've never been on an antipsychotic, I didnt think I was that bad

last night though, and usually when I get this bad it does just turn me into "yes yes this will 100% work" and I get really committed to planning and calm

 

[MatiSendiri]

The fluoxetine IS for the panic attacks, and I always assumed that the suicidal aspect was part of the panic attac symptoms. I've never been on an antipsychotic, I didnt think I was that bad

last night though, and usually when I get this bad it does just turn me into "yes yes this will 100% work" and I get really committed to planning and calm

Based on your plan to just cut yourself, I don't think you plan thoroughly for this one. Not a psychiatrist but I think you just had at least a psychotic episodes. Better to start talking with professionals near you.

 

[Webcore]

Ive planned this exact suicide method about three or four times now, its always the same
I get incredibly freaked out, I plan for CTB and get calm then I wake up and I get better or get on medication again

 

[MatiSendiri]

Ive planned this exact suicide method about three or four times now, its always the same
I get incredibly freaked out, I plan for CTB and get calm then I wake up and I get better or get on medication again

Really sorry for what you felt through. Just want to ask though, did you just really recovered when you take your fluoxetine 20 mg?

 

[Webcore]

Really sorry for what you felt through. Just want to ask though, did you just really recovered when you take your fluoxetine 20 mg?

not instantly, when I had my first really bad break upon joining the site about a year ago it took a few weeks for my supply to kick in
I was a shaky starving mess until the meds settled enough in my system and basically made me normal again

Now Im on it consistently taking it every day since those months ago.

 

[MatiSendiri]

not instantly, when I had my first really bad break upon joining the site about a year ago it took a few weeks for my supply to kick in
I was a shaky starving mess until the meds settled enough in my system and basically made me normal again

Now Im on it consistently taking it every day since those months ago.

But you're still having a psychotic episodes that results in this thread. Do you have any professionals (primarily psychologist) to talk to about what happened yesterday?

Spoiler

(Sorry if its sounds offensive to you I just want to help. If you don't like it you can say so)

 

[Webcore]

But you're still having a psychotic episodes that results in this thread. Do you have any professionals (primarily psychologist) to talk to about what happened yesterday?

Spoiler

(Sorry if its sounds offensive to you I just want to help. If you don't like it you can say so)

not really no, I dont even want my parents to learn I was on the verge of CTB again
I have a doctor but I dont want to report something like that

 

[MatiSendiri]

not really no, I dont even want my parents to learn I was on the verge of CTB again
I have a doctor but I dont want to report something like that

That's... sucks.

Sorry to ask, but do you plan to commit CTB again in the future? I feel like you're just emotionally want to vent by doing practically sh and not CTB.

 

[Webcore]

That's... sucks.

Sorry to ask, but do you plan to commit CTB again in the future? I feel like you're just emotionally want to vent by doing practically sh and not CTB.

I dont necessarily plan on it, but its always in the back of my mind, and it always goes back to the knife method. Last time I attempted my parents found me and put me on lock down before I seriously started taking my meds again. I just hope when the time comes if things get bad to worse, Ill have the adrenaline to just stab and be gone. It brings me a small sort of comfort

 

[MatiSendiri]

I dont necessarily plan on it, but its always in the back of my mind, and it always goes back to the knife method. Last time I attempted my parents found me and put me on lock down before I seriously started taking my meds again. I just hope when the time comes if things get bad to worse, Ill have the adrenaline to just stab and be gone. It brings me a small sort of comfort

Yeah just do sh at that point mate. It seems that you aren't ready for CTB at all.

 

[Webcore]

Yeah just do sh at that point mate. It seems that you aren't ready for CTB at all.

I honestly want to just be okay
I don't want to feel scared and always wanting to CTB I wanna believe I can have a long good life