Venting Misunderstanding insomnia

[Eren]

I think one of the worst things about insomnia is that normally people don't take this problem seriously, including my family.

For example, when I tell them that I have been a whole night without sleep, they do not believe it, and they say "you must have slept something" it is really frustrating, humiliating, as if they do not believe what I say.

Also, when I tell them that I sleep every 3 days, they tell me "well, it's not that bad" downplaying it.

I know they don't mean bad, but it's really awful when you have a problem like this and you don't get empathy.

 

[BitterlyAlive]

Insomnia is awful. I'm really sorry you're being dismissed like that, mate.

 

[Worthless_nobody]

I relate so much. I have horrible insomnia since I was a child and nobody takes me seriously. Not most of my family, not doctors...I had to beg for an Ambien prescription and it only works sometimes..most nights I'm wide awake and get no sleep. I'm sorry your struggling with this too... normal people just don't understand the hell that is insomnia and it hurts so bad to get to support.

 

[Lilja]

I understand how you must be feeling. Insomnia is way worse than anyone who hasn't experienced it can imagine, in a way I can't blame them. I don't usually mention it to other people for that reason but there were some instances I did. Responses were always along the lines of what you said.

"Oh, I can't imagine you didn't sleep AT ALL, the body gets too weak at some point!"
"What do you mean you didn't sleep for a few days, that's not even possible"
"Eh.... can't imagine that you can't just sleep, that doesn't sound plausible to me"
"HAVE YOU TRIED HERBAL TEA BEFORE BED"

At least the people with their herbal tea, and melatonin etc. are trying to give suggestions. But after having been through different Benzos, all of which didn't have the slightest effect on me even if I overdosed a lot, these plant pills won't cut it either.

 

[Eren]

I relate so much. I have horrible insomnia since I was a child and nobody takes me seriously. Not most of my family, not doctors...I had to beg for an Ambien prescription and it only works sometimes..most nights I'm wide awake and get no sleep. I'm sorry your struggling with this too... normal people just don't understand the hell that is insomnia and it hurts so bad to get to support.

I'm really sorry, I know what it feels like, I've had Ambien too, I quit because it didn't really help me. Sometimes I take lorazepam, but it is very strong and the next day I am sedated, it also produces tolerance and dependence very quickly, so I only take it occasionally.

Responses were always along the lines of what you said.

"Oh, I can't imagine you didn't sleep AT ALL, the body gets too weak at some point!"
"What do you mean you didn't sleep for a few days, that's not even possible"
"Eh.... can't imagine that you can't just sleep, that doesn't sound plausible to me"
"HAVE YOU TRIED HERBAL TEA BEFORE BED"

They tell me all those answers almost every time I talk to them about insomnia. It really irritates me.

Sometimes when I can't sleep, I get nervous, and they tell me "you have to relax, if it isn't impossible for you to sleep, that's why you can't sleep." This kind of "advice" really makes me sick.

What I do is just not tell anyone about my problem, even some doctors don't take me seriously.

 

[Vault of Memories]

It's horrible. On top of that I have sleep apnea too. When I say I didn't get any sleep last night, it's not an expression. It literally means my mind was racing throughout the entire night and not able to get a minute of sleep. Now with sleep apnea, even when I get 8 hours I still don't feel rested, because I don't get the REM sleep I need. Honestly don't remember what it feels like to not constantly feel exhausted.

 

[Lilja]

I'm really sorry, I know what it feels like, I've had Ambien too, I quit because it didn't really help me. Sometimes I take lorazepam, but it is very strong and the next day I am sedated, it also produces tolerance and dependence very quickly, so I only take it occasionally.



They tell me all those answers almost every time I talk to them about insomnia. It really irritates me.

Sometimes when I can't sleep, I get nervous, and they tell me "you have to relax, if it isn't impossible for you to sleep, that's why you can't sleep." This kind of "advice" really makes me sick.

What I do is just not tell anyone about my problem, even some doctors don't take me seriously.

"Just try not to think", "You should meditate",... I feel you. While I get that some people really mean well and that meditation, medication, you name it could yield some success in some people, it's just frustrating when you start feeling you have to defend yourself because everyone else thinks they know better or don't believe you. No, I can't meditate myself out of insomnia. No, I can't balarian root and passionflower myself out of insomnia. I couldn't even benzo myself out of this shit hole.

On a side note, I'm not sure if you enjoy reading or if you're interested in sleep/neuro science but I can recommend the book "Why we sleep" by Matthew Walker.
I haven't finished it yet as I'm having a hard time concentrating (thank you, insomnia) and general exhaustion. But I've loved every bit of the book so far. Reminded me yet again of how incredibly important proper sleep is.

 

[Eren]

"Just try not to think", "You should meditate",... I feel you. While I get that some people really mean well and that meditation, medication, you name it could yield some success in some people, it's just frustrating when you start feeling you have to defend yourself because everyone else thinks they know better or don't believe you. No, I can't meditate myself out of insomnia. No, I can't balarian root and passionflower myself out of insomnia. I couldn't even benzo myself out of this shit hole.

On a side note, I'm not sure if you enjoy reading or if you're interested in sleep/neuro science but I can recommend the book "Why we sleep" by Matthew Walker.
I haven't finished it yet as I'm having a hard time concentrating (thank you, insomnia) and general exhaustion. But I've loved every bit of the book so far. Reminded me yet again of how incredibly important proper sleep is.

Exactly, once a nurse in relation to this problem told me "it must be hard" is the most empathetic thing that I have been told about this problem.

 

[geogaddi]

Yes unfortunately many people tend to think there is a solution to everything and if you are struggling its just because you haven't tried hard enough to explore all the options. All it takes to make you feel like someone cares is for them to say something like "I can't imagine what you're going through but it must be awful and I am here if you need to talk/vent". My chronic insomnia has humbled me to the fact that no amount of trying will fix the issue (I have had for over 10 years and spent thousands of pounds) and therefore when I see or hear about people in other terrible situations I try and assume the same.

 

[MyChoiceToLeave]

I understand where you are coming from. I'm in the same situation where I told people that nothing works except for an increase in Klonopin but I cannot get more of it prescribed to me. I'm already addicted to it because they gave it to me in the first place, so why not give me more so I can live a short time longer? I'm shocked at how poorly the brain is able to repair the GABA receptors in the brain. They want to damage me by pumping me full of antipsychotics which no longer work to put me to sleep anyhow. Does anyone here diagnosed with an anxiety disorder or bipolar disorder?

 

[Eren]

Seriously, I can't handle those "tips" like "relax" or "you have to do your part" or "when I'm nervous I also have trouble sleeping" the lack of understanding is really horrible, even among some doctors about what which means severe insomnia.

 

[Bustedhornet]

Yeah, another bad thing are people who stay up late and say it's their "insomnia" keeping them up, like they know what real insomnia is like. It's a horrible debilitating condition and can totally screw your mind, so I sympathise. I've been struggling with insomnia for nearly a year now and it's probably one of the big reasons why I'm suicidally depressed.

 

[BipolarGuy]

I think one of the worst things about insomnia is that normally people don't take this problem seriously, including my family.

For example, when I tell them that I have been a whole night without sleep, they do not believe it, and they say "you must have slept something" it is really frustrating, humiliating, as if they do not believe what I say.

Also, when I tell them that I sleep every 3 days, they tell me "well, it's not that bad" downplaying it.

I know they don't mean bad, but it's really awful when you have a problem like this and you don't get empathy.

Yes you're right people don't understand sleep problems at all, and I'm getting tired of it.

 

[Ghost2211]

Sleep can be the difference between moderately ok and feeling like a train wreck. I don't get how those around you cant see how critical sleep is for emotional and physical wellness. Have you tried OTC sleep aids or melatonin? Have you talked to your doctor about the extent of your insomnia? They can offer you a better prescription stuff if OTC stuff doesn't help.

 

[Deleted member 1465]

Indeed. Try telling someone that you haven't had more than an hours sleep a night for six months, when they feel rough after getting only four hours for one night.
Going without sleep for that long doesn't actually kill you, it just makes you want to be dead to get some fucking sleep.

 

[Eren]

Sleep can be the difference between moderately ok and feeling like a train wreck. I don't get how those around you cant see how critical sleep is for emotional and physical wellness. Have you tried OTC sleep aids or melatonin? Have you talked to your doctor about the extent of your insomnia? They can offer you a better prescription stuff if OTC stuff doesn't help.

Melatonin does nothing for me, I have also tried the sleep routine.

Medication helps, but not for too long, and I don't want to take any more medication, I'm 25 years old and practically addicted to benzos.

My doctor just tells me "it's chronic, get used to living like this"

 

[Ghost2211]

Melatonin does nothing for me, I have also tried the sleep routine.

Medication helps, but not for too long, and I don't want to take any more medication, I'm 25 years old and practically addicted to benzos.

My doctor just tells me "it's chronic, get used to living like this"

Your doctor sucks....

 

[Bustedhornet]

Melatonin does nothing for me, I have also tried the sleep routine.

Medication helps, but not for too long, and I don't want to take any more medication, I'm 25 years old and practically addicted to benzos.

My doctor just tells me "it's chronic, get used to living like this"

Just to be sure, have you tried sleep restriction? Like, allow yourself only 5 hours in bed every night, along with usual sleep hygiene like avoiding screens 30min before bed, no meals 4 hours before, get some sun in morning, etc. Then if you're lucky you can slowly increase the 5 hour window by 15min when you're reliably sleeping every night, then repeat. I tried this and it didn't help me but it helps most people.

 

[Eren]

Just to be sure, have you tried sleep restriction? Like, allow yourself only 5 hours in bed every night, along with usual sleep hygiene like avoiding screens 30min before bed, no meals 4 hours before, get some sun in morning, etc. Then if you're lucky you can slowly increase the 5 hour window by 15min when you're reliably sleeping every night, then repeat. I tried this and it didn't help me but it helps most people.

I have not tried it, although 5 hours is the most I sleep without medication.

 

[MrAsclepius]

Melatonin does nothing for me, I have also tried the sleep routine.

Medication helps, but not for too long, and I don't want to take any more medication, I'm 25 years old and practically addicted to benzos.

My doctor just tells me "it's chronic, get used to living like this"

Get a new doctor.

 

[Bustedhornet]

I have not tried it, although 5 hours is the most I sleep without medication.

Is that sleeping a continuous 5 hours without waking up? If so then that's a good starting point. With sleep restriction you might be able to get it to 5:15, then 5:30, who knows. It's worth a shot.

 

[Eren]

Is that sleeping a continuous 5 hours without waking up? If so then that's a good starting point. With sleep restriction you might be able to get it to 5:15, then 5:30, who knows. It's worth a shot.

Sometimes but no always

 

[Bustedhornet]

Sometimes but no always

Ah! Well, google it and try it out anyway. Nothing to lose!

 

[Chupacabra 44]

I'm reading this as I'm struggling with my sleep over the past few weeks. My lack of sleep triggers my hypomania/mania and my hypomania/mania leads to lack of sleep. I understood the theme of these posts, but I'll kick in a couple subtle suggestions.

First, take your melatonin at sundown NOT before bedtime. Make sure it contains vitamin B6. (I need to order more. Reading other tips before I place my order). FYI, my melotonin never did much until I tried one with B6.

Next, I usually fall asleep in two minutes but can't stay asleep when my issues get triggered. Dr. Oz says this can be from low blood sugar while sleeping. Ideas are try eating a cup of cottage cheese before bed. This is full of slower digesting casein protein VS whey. (Greek yogurt tends to have more whey compared to cottage cheese, for example). Make sure it is NOT fat free, ideally. Fat content will slow digestion and better keep blood sugar levels stable.

Chupacabra, if you're such an expert why are you here? Reading these posts jarred my memory on this topic. Plus, I was looking at big pharma options. I have some four year old restoril and trazadone and wanted to cross check ideas. Was considering asking doc for a benzo prescription. Not so sure after reading your stories here. Think I'm off to the store to buy full fat cottage cheese instead.

 

[Deleted member 1465]

I used to be able to sleep anywhere, like damn cat.

Think I'm off to the store to buy full fat cottage cheese instead.

LOL interesting. Let us know how that goes. And the dreams.

 

[Eren]

I'm reading this as I'm struggling with my sleep over the past few weeks. My lack of sleep triggers my hypomania/mania and my hypomania/mania leads to lack of sleep. I understood the theme of these posts, but I'll kick in a couple subtle suggestions.

First, take your melatonin at sundown NOT before bedtime. Make sure it contains vitamin B6. (I need to order more. Reading other tips before I place my order). FYI, my melotonin never did much until I tried one with B6.

Next, I usually fall asleep in two minutes but can't stay asleep when my issues get triggered. Dr. Oz says this can be from low blood sugar while sleeping. Ideas are try eating a cup of cottage cheese before bed. This is full of slower digesting casein protein VS whey. (Greek yogurt tends to have more whey compared to cottage cheese, for example). Make sure it is NOT fat free, ideally. Fat content will slow digestion and better keep blood sugar levels stable.

Chupacabra, if you're such an expert why are you here? Reading these posts jarred my memory on this topic. Plus, I was looking at big pharma options. I have some four year old restoril and trazadone and wanted to cross check ideas. Was considering asking doc for a benzo prescription. Not so sure after reading your stories here. Think I'm off to the store to buy full fat cottage cheese instead.

Thanks for the tips.

I try not to eat anything for several hours before going to bed, it is what I have always been recommended.

 

[BipolarGuy]

I know how you feel, I'm tired of having problems sleeping.

 

[MariV]

I think one of the worst things about insomnia is that normally people don't take this problem seriously, including my family.

For example, when I tell them that I have been a whole night without sleep, they do not believe it, and they say "you must have slept something" it is really frustrating, humiliating, as if they do not believe what I say.

Also, when I tell them that I sleep every 3 days, they tell me "well, it's not that bad" downplaying it.

I know they don't mean bad, but it's really awful when you have a problem like this and you don't get empathy.

ive been insomniac my whole life. if om ever sleepy is during the day. its horrible...i got a psychosis crisis once after 4 nights without sleep. youre not alone with this frustration

 

[Metalhead]

I understand where you are coming from. I'm in the same situation where I told people that nothing works except for an increase in Klonopin but I cannot get more of it prescribed to me. I'm already addicted to it because they gave it to me in the first place, so why not give me more so I can live a short time longer? I'm shocked at how poorly the brain is able to repair the GABA receptors in the brain. They want to damage me by pumping me full of antipsychotics which no longer work to put me to sleep anyhow. Does anyone here diagnosed with an anxiety disorder or bipolar disorder?

Yeah I have bipolar 2, feel free to PM if you want to chat.

I'm reading this as I'm struggling with my sleep over the past few weeks. My lack of sleep triggers my hypomania/mania and my hypomania/mania leads to lack of sleep. I understood the theme of these posts, but I'll kick in a couple subtle suggestions.

First, take your melatonin at sundown NOT before bedtime. Make sure it contains vitamin B6. (I need to order more. Reading other tips before I place my order). FYI, my melotonin never did much until I tried one with B6.

Next, I usually fall asleep in two minutes but can't stay asleep when my issues get triggered. Dr. Oz says this can be from low blood sugar while sleeping. Ideas are try eating a cup of cottage cheese before bed. This is full of slower digesting casein protein VS whey. (Greek yogurt tends to have more whey compared to cottage cheese, for example). Make sure it is NOT fat free, ideally. Fat content will slow digestion and better keep blood sugar levels stable.

Chupacabra, if you're such an expert why are you here? Reading these posts jarred my memory on this topic. Plus, I was looking at big pharma options. I have some four year old restoril and trazadone and wanted to cross check ideas. Was considering asking doc for a benzo prescription. Not so sure after reading your stories here. Think I'm off to the store to buy full fat cottage cheese instead.

Are you bipolar 1 ?

 

[Eren]

ive been insomniac my whole life. if om ever sleepy is during the day. its horrible...i got a psychosis crisis once after 4 nights without sleep. youre not alone with this frustration

I'm really sorry, it's horrible, I too have spent several days (5) without sleep and I know how horrible it is.