• Hey Guest,

    If you want to donate, we have a thread with updated donation options here at this link: About Donations

  • Hey Guest,

    We made a Twitter thread regarding the Kenneth Law situation on Twitter at this link here if you would like to take a look. It shows that the journalists covering this case aren't objective and clarifies our position on the matter. If you would like to view the thread: Click Here
h.s.p.

h.s.p.

Sometimes goodbye's the only way
Dec 8, 2023
179
Hi everyone.
Like most of you I feel stuck in a situation I can't get out of. I'm currently on medication (which do not seem to do much) and attending psychotherapy sessions, though I feel like I can't be fixed (again, like most of you).
I don't know if I can win the battle against my issues or not, what matters right now is trying.
The suffering has somewhat made me more connected to other people's misery so I wondered it might be a nice idea to participate in the forum.
I think I'll be posting some games/music related stuff soon.
Right now, I'm happy to be with you all.
 
h.s.p.

h.s.p.

Sometimes goodbye's the only way
Dec 8, 2023
179
Hello! I finally decided to introduce myself and try to chat here.
As a child, I dreamed of super powers and travel.. I am currently diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome, ADHD and generalized anxiety disorder, I have sensory and emotional super sensitivity
Hello and welcome, I'm new too.
You gave quite a detailed (albeit sad) description of yourself and those 2 things you said ring a bell:

1) When I was like 9 yo I convinced myself I was a vampire after watching a comedy about a young man who is bitten by an attractive female vamp.
He had to wear sunglasses during daylight and used a blender to make milkshakes out of milk and whole pieces of raw meat.
I don't know why but that kinda fascinated me and I started wearing sunglasses over of the eyeglasses I had to wear.
Tried tasting blood from raw beef leftovers but honestly didn't like it that much.
Been attracted to monsters and scary things since a very young age.

2) As for sensitivity, I'm an introvert and share some features with the Highly Sensitive Person personality trait.
Regardless of labels, for me it means that some feelings are of much higher intensity than most people's.
People hate, I HATE.
People get sad, I GET SAD.
Some stimuli (music in particular, but also landscapes and cinema to some extent) resonate incredibly deep within me.
If that's what you mean I understand you pal. It can make your life a rollercoaster of emotions.
 
Last edited:
J

just dave

Member
Dec 12, 2023
22
Hi all, I'm Dave.

I'm not totally sure why I joined up. I guess I was looking for some forums where people weren't judgy and think less of me for feeling the way I do.

Thanks for welcoming me here. If not for a long time, then I hope I can be insightful or gain some insight before I go.
 
T

tentry

New Member
Dec 12, 2023
1
Hello, i just made this account a few minutes ago. Im 19. I don't fully know why i signed up. I guess it's cause i started coming here more often so i thought i might as well make an account. I want to off myself. I don't know how. I'm hoping i can find some methods that i could think about and that are possible with the resources i have.
 
NappinHappening

NappinHappening

Better toxic than dead.
Dec 12, 2023
24
Introduction/vent

Be me:
Chubby a lot bullied kid since kindergarten. Used to fight back before getting repeatedly punished for defending myself.
Grow up in very toxic family/household. Parents divorced. Father ex-criminal addict and alcoholic. Mother mentally ill. Few hereditary illnesses like anxiety and schizophrenia.
Mother founds new BF while my father in prison shortly after being born. BF's is alcoholic too.
Hated inside family for being different and fat from BFs side. (Mother never really tried to stop him since she had none of her own mind. BFs told her what to think and do.)
Grew up in very abusive environment. Never had friends. (Im probably also autistic and adhd??)
Shouting and being threatened was every das on going situation since my 7 y.o.

Fast forward to teens:
HS everybody hated me for being me and not some ordinary guys (used to be very visually different from other people think goth or something like that)
Gets bullied more, starts smoking weed gets addicted lose about 5 or 6 six years of life smoking weed.
Fucks up school thanks to addiction + mental health problems (BPD, GAD, social anxiety, very intense depression , suicidal ideations and lame way of trying to kill myself //actually wanted someone to notice my pain and help me, only lead to being bullied more.)
Ran away from home thanks to it being life endangering in 17. No one cared i ran away.

At this point have been dating few times not believing anyone could love me. (First two relationships gets cheated on creating trust issues even bigger then before)
Falls in love with a girl. Love her too much.
She teach me how to use drugs. Get addicted to mdma and meth.
Turns out girl didn't love me just used me to sell drugs and having them for free.
One day says to me very angrily : "i don't really care whats going on in your stupid head" while co-drawing on vacation or how to say it in english.
Other day binds me to the bed and give me a helluva sexual and bloody trauma for rest of my life.
Breaks up with her after that and few other heart crushing moments. She founds a new boyfriend in a week after break up and i somewhat get my shit together after 7 years of being broken thanks to her and sometimes crying about loving someone who used me as a distraction from her fucked up stupid life.

Summary for recent days:
- 5 years alone
-0 friends who value me as human being that wouldn't try to use me one way or another
- family doesn't give a shit about me
-unfinished education ( learning disabilities, trauma and mental health making it impossible)
-unable to find job (been trying for many months)
-cant support myself , unable to have a family nor GF of my own cause of that. Being extremely depressed and lonely cause of that(Government bucks is the only thing that keeps me living in this nightmare)
-living like this for many years having zero hope on improvoment cause i tried all of it. (hospitalization, psychotherapy, medications... Even alternative medicine from ayahuasca to kambo... Nothing helped pernamently.)
-addicted
-depressed
-without any goal
-discriminated on all levels of society from rider's pass to living as a normal person in general.

Recently i gave up on my life cause its not going anywhere and i cant do anything about it.

Last 7 years been the same of me rotting in my home alone , watching tvs/shows/moves and getting high to get over loneliness most of the time. Slipping out of and inside my psychosis believing all people i know, even my family, used to plot against me and force me to kill myself indirectly so they would be free of me finally.

Im currently looking at the SN CTB and so far i found SN / strips and painkillers..
If anyone had any recommendations for prescription free anti emetics let me know.
Since my account is new tag me and I will drop , for example, a telegram @.

Thanks for reading. There's much more that had happened but i don't want to relive it all inside my head by remembering it all.
 
PrettyPotato

PrettyPotato

-
Dec 11, 2023
117
Hey,
thought I should add my intro here too. I've just joined.

I see only one route forward now and I'm fine with that, but there are very few places on the internet to discuss feelings about all of this, or even just to have someone say hi. Also not a bad thing to check logistics on methods, etc!

So glad this site is available anyway.
The thread about the topic on a popular website is atrocious - replies to every thread filled with fake emotion, and kids thinking they're going to die by drinking too much coffee :/

I'm probably pretty old compared to a lot of people here (52) and I've got what is probably quite an unusual story re my current situation. I'll post it in a day or two - maybe someone will find it an interesting distraction...
 
h.s.p.

h.s.p.

Sometimes goodbye's the only way
Dec 8, 2023
179
i don't know what i'm supposed to be doing in life, although I'm trying for a uni degree to keep latching onto such a glimmer of hope.
The fact that you're sticking to your goal despite your issues is remarkable. Studying can be nearly impossible if you're experiencing mental health problems.
I hope you keep going, you owe it to yourself to - at least - keep trying.
Welcome to the family.
 
daocreator

daocreator

Unstable uni student
Nov 29, 2023
45
The fact that you're sticking to your goal despite your issues is remarkable. Studying can be nearly impossible if you're experiencing mental health problems.
I hope you keep going, you owe it to yourself to - at least - keep trying.
Welcome to the family.
Well it's actually adding onto why I'd want to CTB. It's just hard, and even after getting a degree it's a hard to secure a job; making it kinda pointless. So I'm stuck on a loop of having a glimmer of hope and then wanting to CTB the day after
 
willow368

willow368

Gone before 20 :) (hopefully)
Dec 12, 2023
6
Hi, I'm a 19 y/o girl from Western Europe.
I've been struggling with SI since I was 12 due to bullying, depression and trauma…And I am finally ready to leave this world behind, but I want to make sure I succeed. As I can't live with the consequences of a failed attempt … That's also why I came here, to do research on the best methods.

Some more personal things: I have a girlfriend, I enjoy reading and going on a walk outside, I have rats as pets, I am still in high school. And I think that's it.
 
lostforever77

lostforever77

Member
Dec 13, 2023
67
Sometimes I don't even know where to begin. I have no living family for the most part. I was adopted at birth and then the Birth Mother died from cancer when I was 8. Lived with her parents who raised me, who both died in my early 20's. They were pretty abusive, but I did get to take of them as they got ready to die. Got married and had two kids just to be told after 16 years that my wife is leaving me, taking my kids, and I will never see her again. By the way this was 2 days before my anniversary and a couple of days before Halloween. Of course Christmas is right around the corner and New years. Honestly there is a tiny part that thinks my wife wants me to take myself out, why else would she pick this exact time?
I am actually pretty successful monetarily, but I am not what you would call a "Alpha" male, as my wife as repeatedly reminded me. But I still love her and I still love my kids of course. She plans on serving me soon. If she wants her freedom I would rather her do it as a widow than divorce, I also have a nice life insurance policy, which does cover death by suicide. I just don't have it in my anymore to keep going. I am almost 50, if I met someone today and went through this again, I would be left when I was over 60? Not to mention how do you trust anyone ever again, she basically said she has been lying for a long time about loving me. Yes, she can be very abusive, why do I lover her this much!
I am on anti depressants, but honestly while it helps with the emotions, it just means your have a clearer head to think with, which may not always be best. I will have soon not have a single person to morn me, I really can't think of anything sadder Well that is my story of why I joined this site.
 
BlockHammer

BlockHammer

Confused loser
Oct 25, 2023
165
It's late for me to introduce myself but im gonna do it anyway

Hello everyone, you can called me Hammer or Block, whatever you like. Im from south-east asia, Im a jobless loser who trying his best to got a job but deslite all of my effort, i haven't got a job at all and it's make me embaressed of myself especially when i saw my friend has already achieve something

The reason why i joined this forum was because one day, if my life get worse probably im gonna used the methode that has been given by this community (and also to rant and share my thought about sensitive topic). But now i still want to fight to make my life better
 
f1f7y8yoL053r

f1f7y8yoL053r

Member
Nov 14, 2023
21
Hi.
Just turned 58 y/o, male. No family. Victim of online Romance Scam. I've never felt like I belonged in this world, and the one time I finally thought I'd actually found love in this horrible life, it turns out to be an online romance scam. Why am I not surprised? I was just starting to think maybe I could have a life, maybe my luck was changing. Lol. I should've known better.
There's no place in this world for me. Thanks for listening.
 
B

bungalow13

Member
Oct 22, 2023
22
Introduction/vent

Be me:
Chubby a lot bullied kid since kindergarten. Used to fight back before getting repeatedly punished for defending myself.
Grow up in very toxic family/household. Parents divorced. Father ex-criminal addict and alcoholic. Mother mentally ill. Few hereditary illnesses like anxiety and schizophrenia.
Mother founds new BF while my father in prison shortly after being born. BF's is alcoholic too.
Hated inside family for being different and fat from BFs side. (Mother never really tried to stop him since she had none of her own mind. BFs told her what to think and do.)
Grew up in very abusive environment. Never had friends. (Im probably also autistic and adhd??)
Shouting and being threatened was every das on going situation since my 7 y.o.

Fast forward to teens:
HS everybody hated me for being me and not some ordinary guys (used to be very visually different from other people think goth or something like that)
Gets bullied more, starts smoking weed gets addicted lose about 5 or 6 six years of life smoking weed.
Fucks up school thanks to addiction + mental health problems (BPD, GAD, social anxiety, very intense depression , suicidal ideations and lame way of trying to kill myself //actually wanted someone to notice my pain and help me, only lead to being bullied more.)
Ran away from home thanks to it being life endangering in 17. No one cared i ran away.

At this point have been dating few times not believing anyone could love me. (First two relationships gets cheated on creating trust issues even bigger then before)
Falls in love with a girl. Love her too much.
She teach me how to use drugs. Get addicted to mdma and meth.
Turns out girl didn't love me just used me to sell drugs and having them for free.
One day says to me very angrily : "i don't really care whats going on in your stupid head" while co-drawing on vacation or how to say it in english.
Other day binds me to the bed and give me a helluva sexual and bloody trauma for rest of my life.
Breaks up with her after that and few other heart crushing moments. She founds a new boyfriend in a week after break up and i somewhat get my shit together after 7 years of being broken thanks to her and sometimes crying about loving someone who used me as a distraction from her fucked up stupid life.

Summary for recent days:
- 5 years alone
-0 friends who value me as human being that wouldn't try to use me one way or another
- family doesn't give a shit about me
-unfinished education ( learning disabilities, trauma and mental health making it impossible)
-unable to find job (been trying for many months)
-cant support myself , unable to have a family nor GF of my own cause of that. Being extremely depressed and lonely cause of that(Government bucks is the only thing that keeps me living in this nightmare)
-living like this for many years having zero hope on improvoment cause i tried all of it. (hospitalization, psychotherapy, medications... Even alternative medicine from ayahuasca to kambo... Nothing helped pernamently.)
-addicted
-depressed
-without any goal
-discriminated on all levels of society from rider's pass to living as a normal person in general.

Recently i gave up on my life cause its not going anywhere and i cant do anything about it.

Last 7 years been the same of me rotting in my home alone , watching tvs/shows/moves and getting high to get over loneliness most of the time. Slipping out of and inside my psychosis believing all people i know, even my family, used to plot against me and force me to kill myself indirectly so they would be free of me finally.

Im currently looking at the SN CTB and so far i found SN / strips and painkillers..
If anyone had any recommendations for prescription free anti emetics let me know.
Since my account is new tag me and I will drop , for example, a telegram @.

Thanks for reading. There's much more that had happened but i don't want to relive it all inside my head by remembering it all.
Your like me but I didn't do the drug's.
 
D

DeadByDayLight93

New Member
Dec 14, 2023
2
I'm just bored with life. I have no illusions, no desires, I teach at my country's most prestigious university but I don't feel like life has anything to offer me that I consider worth living for. I enjoy music and videogames, I'm from México and I'd gladly catch the bus and share a ride with someone likeminded, if not then I shall leave this world they same way I entered, alone.

May your rides be peacefull.
See you along.
 
h.s.p.

h.s.p.

Sometimes goodbye's the only way
Dec 8, 2023
179
Well it's actually adding onto why I'd want to CTB. It's just hard, and even after getting a degree it's a hard to secure a job; making it kinda pointless. So I'm stuck on a loop of having a glimmer of hope and then wanting to CTB the day after
IMHO, it could be worse if you didn't have the degree goal, you might be stuck in a loop of wanting to ctb without a glimmer of hope. Anyway, I admire you.
If you feel like sharing, what are you studying?
 
daocreator

daocreator

Unstable uni student
Nov 29, 2023
45
IMHO, it could be worse if you didn't have the degree goal, you might be stuck in a loop of wanting to ctb without a glimmer of hope. Anyway, I admire you.
If you feel like sharing, what are you studying?
I'm studying CS. It's a well-known fact how discrete maths and physics is cancerous, so it really doesn't help my SI.
For my SI... I really think I could ignore it if I had an actual way to CTB, since I won't hesitate to end it if I had the chance; as I did many times, without success of course.

Anyway, it's a goal that I'm going for. If I don't even succeed in passing the first exams, I might really buy SN or some way, since I'd be a big disappointment, and with no reason to live really
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: not-2-b-the-answer
h.s.p.

h.s.p.

Sometimes goodbye's the only way
Dec 8, 2023
179
I'm studying CS. It's a well-known fact how discrete maths and physics is cancerous, so it really doesn't help my SI.
For my SI... I really think I could ignore it if I had an actual way to CTB, since I won't hesitate to end it if I had the chance; as I did many times, without success of course.

Anyway, it's a goal that I'm going for. If I don't even succeed in passing the first exams, I might really buy SN or some way, since I'd be a big disappointment, and with no reason to live really
I wish I could help you more than this, but sometimes all you can do is keep living one more day and keep trying getting better. A kind word from someone may help too.
I know it may sound cliché but some people find relief in this.
I assume you called for professional help already so will spare you some useless advice about that, but I can relate to what you said.
Keep trying, if it doesn't work the final decision is yours to take. At least you won't say that you didn't try.
That's what I'm doing too.
 
Last edited:
mentalcheese

mentalcheese

-
Dec 14, 2023
8
Hello, you can call me Em. I've lurked this site for a couple months and finally created an account. I'm 19 and currently in university. I have no more motivation for life anymore. I struggle with depression and eating disorders since 13. Everything in my life has backfired on me. I can't see myself living past 25. I'm so lonely and feel like I have a terrible personality that pushes people away from me. I've isolated myself for the past 2 years rotting away in my bedroom. I feel like i'm awkward at even existing. It would just be better for everyone if I'm gone. I'm here to research and finally come to a decision on my method. As of now, I don't have a final date. Ig I still have a small bit of hope that something will drastically improve my life, but ctb has always been an option for me. The world is just shitty, I don't want to be on here for too long.
 
Last edited:
ixkitty

ixkitty

Let me be Selfish, just this once.
Aug 15, 2020
308
Good morning,

You can call me Ixkitty. As of this posting, I'm 33. My pronouns are they/he/she in preferred order !
I have an Associate's degree in General Studies so nothing fancy.
I am a passive, non-confrontational person that loves to make everyone feel better about themselves except myself! My self loathing has no bounds.
my hobbies include everything that involves the hands and a good friend that can guide me through the process. I enjoy anime and I'm a strong supporter of whatever my partner wants to do (When I have one).
 
prettycvnt

prettycvnt

Member
Dec 15, 2023
72
Hi everyone
I'm new to this site. I'm not a very interesting person. I have Bipolar 2 and ADHD. They don't make my life too difficult. A lot of people on here have suffered quite a bit and I feel for them. I honestly want to ctb out of pure cowardice. The first time I "attempted" (if you can even call it that) was when I was about 11/12 and I was overwhelmed withy schoolwork, so I figured itd be better to die. I failed (obviously) and nothing happened besides a seizure that could have been completely unrelated to the attempt. I don't think I have what it takes to live a decent life. I'm currently a NEET, leeching of my family for as long as they'll let me. I hope I can ctb soon and rid my family and friends of the lazy excuse of a person I am. It's the least I can do.
 
binturong

binturong

shining of stars calls me home
Jul 4, 2019
64
Hello and welcome, I'm new too.
You gave quite a detailed (albeit sad) description of yourself and those 2 things you said ring a bell:

1) When I was like 9 yo I convinced myself I was a vampire after watching a comedy about a young man who is bitten by an attractive female vamp.
He had to wear sunglasses during daylight and used a blender to make milkshakes out of milk and whole pieces of raw meat.
I don't know why but that kinda fascinated me and I started wearing sunglasses over of the eyeglasses I had to wear.
Tried tasting blood from raw beef leftovers but honestly didn't like it that much.
Been attracted to monsters and scary things since a very young age.

2) As for sensitivity, I'm an introvert and share some features with the Highly Sensitive Person personality trait.
Regardless of labels, for me it means that some feelings are of much higher intensity than most people's.
People hate, I HATE.
People get sad, I GET SAD.
Some stimuli (music in particular, but also landscapes and cinema to some extent) resonate incredibly deep within me.
If that's what you mean I understand you pal. It can make your life a rollercoaster of emotions.
Probably many people dreamed of super powers in childhood, but for me it was something more.

Firstly, for most of my life, another reality was formed and developed in my imagination, where I could travel to other worlds and turn into anything. This story had a plot, heroes and villains. I dreamed that one day it would become a reality, I knew that I couldn't believe in it forever, but for now I could, it supported me.

Secondly, when I really liked a movie, cartoon or game, I loved weaving elements from these worlds into my reality. For example, when I was at school, during physical education, when we had to run in circles, I imagined that a snapper (creature from the game Gothic) was chasing us.. and then eats my classmates (I'm not evil, almost everyone bullied me). I dreamed almost always, dreams are like oxygen to me.

Thirdly, I never had a clear definition of who I am. Besides traveling through my dream world sometimes I tend to borrow the personality of a character I like (sometimes neutral images stick to me for a short period), during this period the voice of the internal dialogue often sounds like the character's voice, the manner of speech is borrowed. I remember I really liked feeling like the Prince of Persia when I played Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time. I even created a simple costume and a sword. Later I liked the image of little Simba, I drew lions, sang songs from the cartoon and I learned to roar (I like it, Since then, if the situation allows, I always growl when something pisses me off).
But more often I came up with my own character who was connected with the surroundings of the world I liked. I was an anthropomorphic ninja fox from a hidden leaf and made something like shuriken's, imagined myself as an anthropomorphic kitten Shinigami (Bleach is one of my favorite anime), a vampire too there was (positive character).
I haven't tried raw meat (except for salted minced meat), curious but the smell is repulsive. I was wondering what it would be like to be a beast of prey, probably raw meat is different for their receptors, perhaps as a delicacy. I would like to be an animal like a wolf or a forest cat, but not real, but fabulous. Although I sometimes feel the thrill of the hunt when looking at small animals, I don't want to kill anyone. Well, if only the prey were absolute evil, for example, an evil demonic hare.. although no, sorry for him, just imagine.. it so Cute!
A rich imagination is all I have. Even before the diagnosis, I assumed that I had AS.
but I doubted it, because the sources that I read said that this is not typical for most aspies.

Regarding emotions, probably so. Because of this, I have psychological trauma for reasons that are insignificant for the average person, constant avoidance, anxiety, rejection of criticism, and most of my life I have been in a state of burnout.
Good emotions can be delightful, but sometimes it's also exhausting; the higher you fly, the more painful it is to fall.
When I realized that I was capable of killing myself, I felt for the first time that I was in control of my life, it revived and inspired me, now I no longer want to return to energy-saving mode, on the other hand, due to increased emotionality, my nervous system is completely frayed, something like OCD and nervous tics are getting worse over the years, declines the mood is becoming more and more unbearable each time, if I don't have time to find something to cope with this, one day I won't be able to stand it, but I'd rather be absolutely dead than half-dead.
Antidepressant is an acceptable remedy, but undesirable, unless there is something better than the one I tried, it did not suppress emotions much but increased fatigue. I recently bought a fitness membership, it helped me once, but only once, that time I had motivation (I have big problems with this), but now I remember the reason, so I think this time I can get remission.
I want to be stronger to live on my own terms, or at least die on my own terms.
 
E

Ephemeron

Member
Dec 17, 2023
54
Where to begin...

I'm a 30-something guy living somewhere in Europe. I feel hesitant to say much these days. I don't even know why I care anymore. Sometimes I feel like I should just write everything online and show the world the kind of fucked-up guy I am. What's even to lose?

Like many here, I suffered abuse in my childhood. The trauma from all this I've carried throughout my entire life. For a very small time after high school, I experienced happiness. I met someone and fell in love. The time I had with her was the only time I ever felt truly happy. I married her. But of course, all the trauma made me completely sabotage that relationship. The decisions were my own, and I don't want to avoid blame, but I was just damaged. I was a piece of shit. I treated her like garbage. Never physically harmed her or anything, but I was just manipulative and took advantage of her. I hate that it's only through retrospect and regret I can understand this. I've never been able to feel love again. I just feel emptiness and despair. I've been on medications in the past, but they just make me into a mindless idiot and have harmed my body. I hate them. I'd rather CTB than ever go on those things again.

I've experienced ideation for as long as I can remember. I harm myself just to feel something. I have a job, but it feels so hard to hold on to. I'm not poor. I'm not a particularly bad-looking guy. But I have no real future. I have no children. I will never be a father. Maybe that's a positive thing, but it hurts. My life is gone, and I'm so tired of it all.

I want the pain to stop. I want to get better, really, but it has been so long. There really is nothing that makes it better. I try to pass the time by doing anything I can to take my mind off it all. I try to think positively and all that, to motivate myself, but years of it hasn't helped. Trauma will always follow me wherever I go. It's there forever.

That's me. Hello.
 
Last edited:
trashhologram

trashhologram

⚰ Baby, let me decompose ⚰
Dec 15, 2023
309
Hi everyone! I've been a lurker of the forum for a while and decided finally to make an account so I can join the discussions.

I'm a Finnish lady, in my late 20's. I have severe depression, anxiety, PTSD, anorexia nervosa binge & purge subtype (in recovery now) and I'm addicted to opioids, benzos, caffeine, nicotine and sugar. I used to be an alcoholic before I started doing opioids. I've been depressed almost my whole life; I tried to kill myself the 1st time when I was only 10 years old. Kinda fucked up tbh.

I have cats and right now they and my family are the reason I'm alive. I do experience suicidal ideation quite a lot but aren't going to CTB yet.

My hobbies include singing, crafts, makeup, nail art and writing poems. Oh! Yoga too! My job? A sex worker.
 
h.s.p.

h.s.p.

Sometimes goodbye's the only way
Dec 8, 2023
179
Probably many people dreamed of super powers in childhood, but for me it was something more.
It is quite a detailed description, thank you for that.
Antidepressants don't seem to me the right medication for your issue, maybe a dopamine antagonist could suit you more, but I'm not a doctor.
I truly hope you get better though, stories like yours touch me deeply.
 
B

boddibo

maybe this year will be the one
Dec 19, 2023
2,395
Hi,

I've been a lurker here for a month now and I've decided to join though my anxiety is as bad as being anxious just from posting here lol ('am I doing this right?' 'am I writing something stupid?')

Don't really know what I suffer from except depression since I'm 9, ideation started since 12, failed at 18 because it was out of impulse on my birthday

Lost five years in university for no degrees, I'm a NEET now and I just want to CTB, hoping the SI won't strike in when I do.

Yup, that's me.
 
kissa

kissa

Member
Dec 20, 2023
11
hi all, ex-lurker here!
i'm 26 and unemployed at the moment because of several mental health issues. been depressed and anxious as long as i can remember, but the thing that mostly affects my will to live is probably the immense feeling of failure and guilt due to my trauma.

i enjoy music, the outdoors and gaming. nice to meet you all! ♡
 

Similar threads

Seiko
Replies
7
Views
327
Recovery
kawaiiphantom
kawaiiphantom
N
Replies
5
Views
237
Offtopic
casual_existence
casual_existence
Dr Iron Arc
Replies
3
Views
267
Suicide Discussion
trashhologram
trashhologram
B
Replies
17
Views
543
Suicide Discussion
ObssessedEirika
ObssessedEirika