Venting I thought this was meant to be a place to respect the decision to die.

[betternever2havbeen]

She can say anything she wants to say! She can be as "pro death" as she wants if that is what it sounds like to you or anyone else! Just don't read it if it offends or bothers you!

She is not telling anyone they should ctb.

For gods sake are we to the point of dictating what we can or can't say or rant about now? Lots of us happen to agree with her. Are we all wrong to do that? Know what, who even cares.

It does NOT seem like a "pro death" site at all. I have no idea how anyone got that idea from anything here. It's her opinion and she hates life and that's ok. And she can be "pro death" as you call it and that doesn't mean she is telling people to ctb. Many here hate life. Many here want to die. Is that a shock or something?

Do people think that if they read her posts they will suddenly decide hey I want to ctb after reading that? People don't need to be convinced to hate life or to ctb here. If someone is here and reads her post they probably already feel the same way. If they don't they will just disagree with it.

The problem is she is making people feel unwelcome and like they shouldn't be here if not conforming to her worldview. Her vents are fine but she is the one trying to dictate what others can say to people and try and make them feel like they shouldn't be posting anything that's not pro-death in reply to ANYONE (not just her) which crosses over a line. Long-term members can just ignore, but new members might feel like they genuinely can't do anything on here but celebrate someone's decision to CTB and it's just not the case. What she considers "pro-life" is very very broad, and she should post examples of that or address it in the thread/report not make a big whole vague rant about it later like it's something we all have to listen to because she's spoken on the matter.

 

[ijustwishtodie]

I'm new here so I may be inaccurate but I wonder as to how this place isn't pro choice or how this place is pro life (by pro life, I mean imposing life on to everybody or at least insinuating that everybody should live no matter what). Over here, I've seen a few posts of people who made their final post, their goodbye post, and people were wishing them peace. That seems pro choice to me. If that same suicidal person were to express that they were going to do a suicide attempt to people outside of this forum, they would most likely get forced into a psych ward because, in the view of society, nobody should be allowed to choose suicide and they should be forced to live instead. Now that doesn't seem pro choice to me.

This place has to be one of the most pro choice (in the context of suicide) forums that I've ever seen

 

[IfyouareamanWinston]

"I think its valid to ask why she is coming from such a black and white perspective where everything is 'prolife' that hints at postive sides."

No it's not valid to ask her that. She can come from a black and white perspective if she wants to. If she wants to view a positive side as pro life that's up to her. I really don't see why anyone here feels entitled to dictate how she SHOULD feel or what she SHOULD say in her posts.

And frankly the more I read posts like the one I just quoted the more I can see what she means.

It's perfectly valid to ask questions about a person perspective if they are posting their opinions on the forum enmass. Like I said in my original post which you specifically removed from the reply, bullying or harassment is never ok.

 

[IfyouareamanWinston]

Who is she bullying? Sorry I'm not sure what you mean I removed your post? I'm not a mod. I'm a little confused and not sure if my brain is glitching or people are making things up. I don't see the reason to be critical of anyone who posts en masse as long as there is an ignore button.

I was talking about peoples replies towards her. I never accused her of bullying anyone. You didn't even read my original post past the first sentence...

 

[IfyouareamanWinston]

I am just going to start over here because I think reply quoting especially without the context of the entire messages makes it seem like the person was saying something they did not say or removing the context of the entire statement.

I am only saying that she is perfectly within her right to post however she feels and the people in this thread have been aggressive and rude to the point of bullying her which is not ok. This is why I said that the thing people are saying to her are completely out of pocket i.e. NOT ok. (I have never once accused her of bullying anyone and I am confused how you came to that misunderstanding )

AT THE SAME TIME, it makes sense why people would be questioning some of her beliefs and the things she has said because she post those thoughts frequently, often labeling things as 'prolife' just because the poster had a positive perspective. Its absolutely fine to think this way but others are within their rights to question it or disagree too!

My perspective is that pro-choice is not equal to anti-life and to me this forum is about peoples right to make choices for themselves and receive information without gatekeeping. I don't think its right to say any post that encourages people to look at a positive perspective is inherently anti-choice as long as the person autonomy is respected and their choice is respected.

 

[lastcuriosity]

As someone new here, it certainly is quite interesting to follow the conversations. I wonder if the boundaries between what is considered pro choice or pro life and the sensitivities are also different in a cultural context.

I'm assuming most registered users here come from Western countries. Is the boundary of what is pro life and pro choice different from users outside of the Western world?

 

[Rhizomorph1]

Agreed.

But surely neither should pro-death people then who exclude pro-choice, which is becoming more evident to me.

Respect can't just be one-way traffic.

Some people on this forum are pretty good at remaining neutral while others are certainly pro-suicide or pro-life.

I wish there were trained, competent people who could provide person-centered, harm-reductive (that is, reducing pain) communication.

Unfortunately the nature of a forum self-run by suicidal people is the cultural discourse will be clouded by bias.

It's something worth keeping in mind as we browse these forums. I'm concerned for the people who aren't as aware of the cultural polarization on these forums and may unfortunately fall too deep into one camp or the other.

It's important to remain level headed. Even as we prepare for death.

 

[IfyouareamanWinston]

Why would someone come to this particular site to harp on the joys of life, or encourage people to look at a positive perspective as you put it, when people are here because they are suicidal and want to not be told to look at the positive side of life? That is what the recovery section is for.

I don't think that what many of the post and responses that have been labeled as 'prolife' by some members of this forum are doing. These are people seeking support and solace as well. Just because you see one positive thing and post it does not make them prolife.

 

[Spike Spiegel]

I think the various sub forums on here help separate the various type of people who come to this place. People come here for a variety of reasons. If you scroll through the recoveree thread, there are many who were suicidal who for whatever reason have kept moving and often share what helped them. I don't see anything wrong with this. I do agree that suicide is a right and a choice. However to hear from those on both sides I always find beneficial, specially when it is an open forum.

---

I use to be suicidal. I still struggle with anxiety and depression but I don't want to kill myself. Now I use this website to both not feel alone, and to understand suicide on a philosophical level. Similar to the myth of Sisyphus which is so often quoted on this forum. There are still plenty of threads on this site with step by step instructions to suicide. I believe the corners of the forum you are looking for still exist.

---

All that being said there is defiantly a time and a place to say some things vs others, and I do get what you mean by people who just automatically try to help often doing the opposite.

 

[IfyouareamanWinston]

I don't actually think that, life awful, hard, painful and full of suffering. It's also meaningless. I just don't agree with labeling any and all positive ideas as prolife.

 

[tiger b]

I was just reading something that is positive happy happy on the forum, everything is wonderful, life is beautiful, I've been down today but now I see how great life is blah blah blah it's readily apparent. I mean come on.

I'm sick and tired of arguing as people are "dead" set in whatever biases they have.

Can you post a link, even by message? I'm not seeing threads like that.

I'm not claiming I'm not without biases but I am trying to learn and I do try and read posts carefully, even ones I wouldn't entirely agree with at first glance.

Otherwise why not simply block so many and live in an echo chamber - I don't see the point in that.

 

[UKscotty]

Freedom of speech needs to be universal for all or it's pointless.

If you don't like what pro lifers have to say, scroll past. Simple.

The right wing government of the UK and US has been attacking free speech for a decade.

 

[tiger b]

I'm not asking for a witchhunt. I just want to see. Where? Delete it afterwards.

Not interested in an argument.

 

[R_N]

I'm not asking for a witchhunt. I just want to see. Where? Delete it afterwards.

Not interested in an argument.

I suggest not bothering with this. If you read how previous back and forths went with them, you can see how pointless it is.

 

[tiger b]

Thanks for your suggestion.

I don't think it's pointless because I'm looking to learn something. Now if you want to describe that as pointless, you are entitled to that definition.

 

[R_N]

Thanks for your suggestion.

I don't think it's pointless because I'm looking to learn something. Now if you want to describe that as pointless, you are entitled to that definition.

Fair enough. Good luck. :)

 

[Life_and_Death]

I suggest not bothering with this. If you read how previous back and forths went with them, you can see how pointless it is.

it wouldnt surprise me if they didnt actually see anything at all.

 

[tiger b]

Here is what FuneralCry said which I am repeating, she's right:

I thought the whole point of this forum was supposed to be a pro-choice place to respect the decision of people to die without all the pro-lifers who are everywhere else, yet there really does seem to be more and more pro-life comments even on here, it repulses me whenever I come across one.

The only reason they're here is to try to argue with people who want to die, as we see more and more here. She's smart not to engage with anyone here. All they do is attack anyone like her, or me.

'More and more comments'...so many she's not reported to the mods at all. You remember reading that, right.

You are not pointing them out...seemingly to avoid causing an argument. Admirable. Yet...what are you just doing with that post? Do you see how someone could call bs at this point?

I'm really trying to see your point in this. I'm just starting to suspect confirmation bias is at work. And no, I'm not arguing with people who 'want to die'. Or you.

I stand by what I said in the first post. It was actually more in support of the op than most people seemed to realise.

Best wishes.

 

[tiger b]

see? argument started. bye.

With yourself? It's not with me.

Feel free to secretly argue with yourself in your own head, maybe question what you are insisting is fact without providing anything of substance to back it up? None of my business.

I think people can read and make up their own minds. I intend to keep doing that.

Cheerio


...deleting one's posts is...pure chicken shit imo, sorry. Either delete all of them or none, selection is pr here.

 

[R_N]

I actually find it more funny they deleted that comment than when they made it.

Discussing things is battlefield in their head where all of the oposing views are bullets and they are the victim. I still don't see myself as an aggressor and my posts are still there for people to read.

I am willing to change my mind if someone can show me what I did wrong in this whole thread. But most of the time they just used this thread as their personal diary randomly quoting people out of context and making questionable points not even related to anything.

I just don't get it. But it is my fault as well for engaging. We didn't get anywhere with this. None of us. Well...

 

[tiger b]

We haven't quite achieved world peace, no...

But...next time!!!

(Noone wins an argument. That's why I wasn't arguing )

 

[penguinl0v3s]

Nobody on here ever says "don't die," but nobody ever says "kill yourself." The way I see it, things are just fine.

 

[ForeverBroken]

I'm new here so I really can't say too much. But I think pro- life and pro-death should be able to exist in the same forum. One can learn from others opinions even if you don't agree with them.

 

[-w-]

I just feel that offering help and support first is the best thing we can do as humans that respect one another.

 

[-w-]

What kind of help and support would you offer someone who is about to ctb?
If someone has unremitting pain 24 hours a day without any relief?
If someone is totally paralyzed?
If someone is homeless and without any money for food?
If someone has severe pschizophrenia and lives outdoors sleeping on sidewalks hallucinating?

I know that these situations definitely suck but I still don't think that the first imideate option should be CTB. I just feel that they should reach out for help first and I know it can be hard and even more so under these circumstances. I just hope you respect my opinion that is all and I just wanted to share it here. I'm not trying to be malicious in any way.

 

[R_N]

I know that these situations definitely suck but I still don't think that the first imideate option should be CTB. I just feel that they should reach out for help first and I know it can be hard and even more so under these circumstances. I just hope you respect my opinion that is all and I just wanted to share it here. I'm not trying to be malicious in any way.

I think that is on the person to decide. If someone decided to ctb we shouldn't pester them about it here.

For some people "help" can also make things much worse and add to their suffering like it did for me. Now I have to suffer even more before I am dead.

 

[-w-]

I think that is on the person to decide. If someone decided to ctb we shouldn't pester them about it here.

For some people "help" can also make things much worse and add to their suffering like it did for me. Now I have to suffer even more before I am dead.

Yeah it is the persons final choice at the end of the day however I just don't inherently think suicide is a good first option. This is just my option on things but I always just wish and hope people the best. I want to help where I can and if you have better suggestions for what I could do lmk.

 

[R_N]

Yeah it is the persons final choice at the end of the day however I just don't inherently think suicide is a good first option. This is just my option on things but I always just wish and hope people the best. I want to help where I can and if you have better suggestions for what I could do lmk.

As long as you are following the rules you will be fine here dw.

 

[randal_bond]

Discussing things is battlefield in their head where all of the oposing views are bullets and they are the victim.

That's the essense of Bordeline personality disorder. Let them be, they don't want to change. Or to listen. And their BPD logic changes depending on the mood.
That's why they're so terrified of being abandoned. Because they know it will happen. There's only so much cr*p one can put up with.

 

[R_N]

That's the essense of Bordeline personality disorder. Let them be, they don't want to change. Or to listen. And their BPD logic changes depending on the mood.
That's why they're so terrified of being abandoned. Because they know it will happen. There's only so much cr*p one can put up with.

I was also diagnosed with bpd long time ago. Just saying.

And again I am not the villain here. There is also the ignore option you know if someone just wants to have monologues and paint everyone else badly.