Venting I thought this was meant to be a place to respect the decision to die.

[IfyouareamanWinston]

I think its valid to ask why she is coming from such a black and white perspective where everything is 'prolife' that hints at postive sides. HOWEVER some of these replies are out of pocket. People are asking her why she hasn't actually killed herself is fucked up regardless of if you believe she is a troll or whatever.

 

[BlockHammer]

I do understand your frustation but remember this site also provide a thread to get better, pro-lifter are everywhere and because for certain video, this site has gain a lot of attention so i think it's normal if there's some prolifter that's intrested in this forum. And last i think everyone who commented already mention this but this's the nature of the internet, you can't expect everybody to have an simillar opinion like you do, some people still see the beauty of life (me included, although i think im probably gonna hate it once i experience everything) but regardless, next time it is the best for you to just ignored that pro-life comment if you find that to be offensive

 

[Meditation guide]

Maybe she is simply dwelling on the idea of life being awful and it runs through her mind continually and this is the only place she has to rant about that, I'm ok with that and I don't read her entire posts every time and I really don't see why, if people are sooooo bothered by them that they read them either.

Who is forcing anyone to read her posts?

I think the only ones who are so bothered by them are pro lifers because who else would even give a damn?
I like how someone twisted the excuse for attacking her into something like "she is trying to convince people to ctb." Most here probably don't need convincing. Based on the reactions she gets on her posts, most people agree with her. And I do too.

 

[randal_bond]

What surprises me is that she still manages to get a reaction out of people. I don't hang around here much and didn't realize that she's been doing it for years and regularly. In this case why do you guys still get the bait? Ignore her. As soon as I understoond yesterday what was going on, I just clicked on her nick, then on "Ignore" button. And that was the end of it.

BUT! She has right to post every day multiple times a day. She also has right to remain narrow-minded and interpret "pro-lifers" in her own way and rage agaisnt her own demons. If you try to limit/stop her, you go down to her level. Ignoring is the way.

 

[Meditation guide]

"I think its valid to ask why she is coming from such a black and white perspective where everything is 'prolife' that hints at postive sides."

No it's not valid to ask her that. She can come from a black and white perspective if she wants to. If she wants to view a positive side as pro life that's up to her. I really don't see why anyone here feels entitled to dictate how she SHOULD feel or what she SHOULD say in her posts.

And frankly the more I read posts like the one I just quoted the more I can see what she means.

 

[Life_and_Death]

"I think its valid to ask why she is coming from such a black and white perspective where everything is 'prolife' that hints at postive sides."

No it's not valid to ask her that. She can come from a black and white perspective if she wants to. If she wants to view a positive side as pro life that's up to her. I really don't see why anyone here feels entitled to dictate how she SHOULD feel or what she SHOULD say in her posts.

And frankly the more I read posts like the one I just quoted the more I can see what she means.

except it completely removes the prochoice in the center which is what this place is.
making this place seem like a prodeath site, which is the problem people seem to be having. but yeah, keep completely ignoring that part

 

[R_N]

"I think its valid to ask why she is coming from such a black and white perspective where everything is 'prolife' that hints at postive sides."

No it's not valid to ask her that. She can come from a black and white perspective if she wants to. If she wants to view a positive side as pro life that's up to her. I really don't see why anyone here feels entitled to dictate how she SHOULD feel or what she SHOULD say in her posts.

And frankly the more I read posts like the one I just quoted the more I can see what she means.

Ok but you can't deny it makes people curious. I mean most of the time her posts don't even seem like an interaction. It is just repeating the same things over and over. She even gives the same reply to different people in different scenarios.

I find it bizarre a bit but like I said I got used to it. I am fine with it and I am not even ignoring her anymore. I read and like some of her posts I agree with even if it is the same thing repeated every time. I also think it is not harmful at all from what I have seen.

But I can also understand some of the people who see it differently and find it interesting.

If you find offense in what I said, that is cool. But we all observe and judge each other even if we don't say it. I was being honest and said my piece and I am fine if someone does this to me. Unless they scream at me and are rude.

 

[Seered Doom]

Really, this discourse is not gonna lead us anywhere useful, so whatever.

 

[R_N]

Really, this discourse is not gonna lead us anywhere useful, so whatever.

I agree.

 

[Meditation guide]

She can say anything she wants to say! She can be as "pro death" as she wants if that is what it sounds like to you or anyone else! Just don't read it if it offends or bothers you!

She is not telling anyone they should ctb.

For gods sake are we to the point of dictating what we can or can't say or rant about now? Lots of us happen to agree with her. Are we all wrong to do that? Know what, who even cares.

It does NOT seem like a "pro death" site at all. I have no idea how anyone got that idea from anything here. It's her opinion and she hates life and that's ok. And she can be "pro death" as you call it and that doesn't mean she is telling people to ctb. Many here hate life. Many here want to die. Is that a shock or something?

Do people think that if they read her posts they will suddenly decide hey I want to ctb after reading that? People don't need to be convinced to hate life or to ctb here. If someone is here and reads her post they probably already feel the same way. If they don't they will just disagree with it.

 

[Seered Doom]

Sadly it sounds like some people want to do that which is very gross

 

[R_N]

She can say anything she wants to say! She can be as "pro death" as she wants if that is what it sounds like to you or anyone else! Just don't read it if it offends or bothers you!

She is not telling anyone they should ctb.

For gods sake are we to the point of dictating what we can or can't say or rant about now? Lots of us happen to agree with her. Are we all wrong to do that? Know what, who even cares.

It does NOT seem like a "pro death" site at all. I have no idea how anyone got that idea from anything here. It's her opinion and she hates life and that's ok. And she can be "pro death" as you call it and that doesn't mean she is telling people to ctb. Many here hate life. Many here want to die. Is that a shock or something?

Do people think that if they read her posts they will suddenly decide hey I want to ctb after reading that? People don't need to be convinced to hate life or to ctb here. If someone is here and reads her post they probably already feel the same way. If they don't they will just disagree with it.

I never said she can't say whatever she wants nor I am dictating what can someone say. Unless your reply was not meant for me.

 

[Meditation guide]

What she rants about is exactly how people with severe debilitating depression feel and think about every minute of every day. It's a portrait into the hellish world of that type of hopeless depression.
And probably people who are paralyzed or have unending pain feel that way. She's expressing what doesn't usually get expressed but what many people endure day in and day out.

 

[Seered Doom]

I never said she can't say whatever she wants nor I am dictating what can someone say. Unless your reply was not meant for me.

I don't think it's specifically pointed at you, no worries.

 

[Meditation guide]

I hope no one here experiences severe hopeless depression. I had one day of it for no particular reason a few months ago, rather than my usual more low level depression, and let me tell you, it is absolutely unbearable.
I can't even describe that level of utter despair and mental torture. So maybe I am sympathetic to anyone who communicates what that feels like. I'm not saying I know for sure that it what the OP goes through, but it reminds me of that.

My friend's brother had that and it was so unrelenting to him he was totally bedridden his whole life from it and finally got ahold of his father's gun and ended his misery.

 

[Seered Doom]

I hope no one here experiences severe hopeless depression. I had one day of it for no particular reason a few months ago, rather than my usual more low level depression, and let me tell you, it is absolutely unbearable.

I feel bad others feel it too. I've had it from 2014-2016 and it sucked ass. It leveled out, thank everything, but I still get bouts of it and it's miserable

 

[R_N]

I hope no one here experiences severe hopeless depression. I had one day of it for no particular reason a few months ago, rather than my usual more low level depression, and let me tell you, it is absolutely unbearable.
I can't even describe that level of utter despair and mental torture. So maybe I am sympathetic to anyone who communicates what that feels like. I'm not saying I know for sure that it what the OP goes through, but it reminds me of that.

My friend's brother had that and it was so unrelenting to him he was totally bedridden his whole life from it and finally got ahold of his father's gun and ended his misery.

So people you disagree with never experienced anything like you did or worse?

You don't even know anyone here enough to say that. This is not good look on you buddy and I agreed with some things you said before.

 

[gvmi]

I am very new here, just a week and am still trying to get my bearings. I have lurked for awhile and this is not the first or second time I have seen this kind of post. I honestly don't understand because at least for a majority of posts, it seems people are reaching out. NOT to be told their feelings to CTB are not rational, that they should call a hotline, that they should keep fighting as we all have bad days, that they should try x,y,z therapies because they will really help you and of course the coup de Grace, that it is selfish, think of the people you will be hurting. But I have seen people ask, should they call a hotline, should they try this therapy. Is my answer supposed to be no, just CTB?

IMO people want to be listened too and heard, and know that someone cares. Or at least is taking the time to read their post and respond. If someone is struggling are we supposed to just encourage them to CTB. I will never do that. I do not WANT anyone to CTB. But I completely understand wanting to and following through or I wouldn't be here. I want to make connections with people who can understand the struggles I face. Even if I am bawling my eyes out later because they made their choice to CTB.

This is something that has bothered me -- Since my lurker era.
I personally think, that if you can get help, and live peacefully without needing to CTB, that that should be the preferable option.
Is that thought pro-life? No, even if I'd prefer that everyone in this forum recovered; I still respect their decisions and choices, even if, as you say, (I am bawling my eyes out later because they made their choice to CTB)

This site is not a death cult, it's a support forum. Support, either with the people that want to CTB, the ones that aren't sure, or the ones that want to recover.

 

[FlyAwayHoney]

Imagine, for a second, that this was an pro-ana form. Everyone is there for the same reasons more or less, and they actively engage in behavior that fuels their ED.

Now imagine you had a user log on everyday for years. Everyday they make posts about how being skinny feels amazing, and there is nothing else like it. Nothing could possibly compare to being thin. They discourage any behavior which might be seen as positive or even hint at recovery.

But…wait a second. This person does not even have an ED of their own. They say, "oh, it's simply too hard for me to engage in any of that myself"

People would be cautious of that user and question them a bit. Simple as that. Some of you are displaying extreme naïveté for the sake of being "nice" and defending someone who has rightfully raised some flags amongst members of the community.

It's not that anyone should attack, bully or, or go on a witch-hunt. I still stand by the fact that I don't even completely deem this person as having wrong intentions. But it is clear the influence they have here with certain people and their influence could create a space on this site that is not what this place is about. I think a lot of other members see that and take heed.

* I also think both sides are coming from a place of care. Care for this community and it's members. Important to recognize that.

 

[Meditation guide]

So people you disagree with never experienced anything like you did or worse?

You don't even know anyone here enough to say that. This is not good look on you buddy and I agreed with some things you said before.

What you just wrote is so off the wall I don't even understand it. I get it that you want to attack me but it helps to be able to explain it better. My post had nothing to do with disagreeing with someone so if you just want to attack me it was a failure.

 

[FlyAwayHoney]

What you just wrote is so off the wall I don't even understand it. I get it that you want to attack me but it helps to be able to explain it better. My post had nothing to do with disagreeing with someone so if you just want to attack me it was a failure.

Your post was acting as if anyone who disagrees with FC has never experienced severe depression and hopelessness. You were invalidating everyone's experiences because you disagree with them. It was an ignorant statement.

 

[Meditation guide]

This is something that has bothered me -- Since my lurker era.
I personally think, that if you can get help, and live peacefully without needing to CTB, that that should be the preferable option.
Is that thought pro-life? No, even if I'd prefer that everyone in this forum recovered; I still respect their decisions and choices, even if, as you say, (I am bawling my eyes out later because they made their choice to CTB)

This site is not a death cult, it's a support forum. Support, either with the people that want to CTB, the ones that aren't sure, or the ones that want to recover.

People with severe depression usually do try to get help, over and over. People make the mistake of thinking everyone can be helped and unfortunately many people cannot be helped, no matter how much they try.

Your post was acting as if anyone who disagrees with FC has never experienced severe depression and hopelessness. You were invalidating everyone's experiences because you disagree with them.

You misunderstood what I wrote so bye. You don't have to read my posts any more if you choose to misunderstand me and attack me.

 

[R_N]

What you just wrote is so off the wall I don't even understand it. I get it that you want to attack me but it helps to be able to explain it better. My post had nothing to do with disagreeing with someone so if you just want to attack me it was a failure.

I am not attacking you. We are just discussing things but you are all over the place in this thread. By that logic your posts are also an attack on other people here.

I don't have ill will towards you at all, I just didn't like the patronizing tone of that post. Hell, I even agreed on some things you said before.

 

[FlyAwayHoney]

People with severe depression usually do try to get help, over and over. People make the mistake of thinking everyone can be helped and unfortunately many people cannot be helped, no matter how much they try.

You misunderstood what I wrote so bye. You don't have to read my posts any more if you choose to misunderstand me and attack me.

No one here is acting you, at least I am not. It is clear what was insinuated (intentionally or not) in your post. Why else write it here and in response to the people you are disagreeing with. Discussion and criticism is not an attack.

 

[Seered Doom]

Fucking ell, you guys. Who the hell is this arguing even helping?

 

[Life Is My Coffin]

Fucking ell, you guys. Who the hell is this arguing even helping?

Think it's about time mods lock this shit up

 

[Seered Doom]

I think so too

 

[Life_and_Death]

Think it's about time mods lock this shit up

I think so too

a little surprised they didnt sooner lol

 

[subhuman metalhead]

After reading through FC's post and the replies of everyone else, here is my conclusion if anyone cares to read:

FC (in my opinion) seems to not want help which is okay; you cannot force people to get help if they don't want it, but because of her misery, she's venting and projecting onto everyone else which is could be seen as hurtful or just mildly annoying. Sure, she has the right to post and wallow in her own misery all she wants but it's not fair for her to bring everybody down with her into the depths of her misery. The whole point of being pro-choice is to respect someone's decision to CTB, not to encourage them to CTB. I understand that she has this extremely Black-and-white mindset where everyone is either pro-life or pro-choice. I get it, as I also suffer from autism and because of that I'm hardwired to think in black and white. However, I understand why other people think more nuanced which FC doesn't seem to have the ability to do. The question of "Why hasn't FC CTB'd yet" is likely a complex one. The reason a lot of us–including myself–haven't CTB'd yet is because we're either scared of what comes after death, we don't want to be in pain when we CTB, We don't know what we'll miss out on, or we don't like what others will think of us after our departure. I cannot know what is preventing FC from choosing to CTB but I can still speculate. Lastly, it's clear that FC doesn't want to have a meaningful discussion about this topic, for she has already made up her mind. She's seems to just be posting this stuff to either get a reaction out of people or to spam or to vent. If she is bothering you, the best you can do is put her on ignore so that her postings don't bother you. It doesn't dismiss her actions but it is away to avoid further distress or annoyance. However, she does give this site a worse reputation and is a notably controversial figure on this site. Whether she wants to leave the site or get off the internet is her decision though and we cannot force her to leave unless she does something unarguably heinous.

 

[MyLifeisHell]

FC is free to vent about her despair and world outlook all she wants. She should refrain from repeatedly creating these kinds of threads vaguely accusing the community (and the moderation team's ability to moderate). They only cause drama and polemic.

It's probably unrealistic to expect a public, clearweb suicide forum that has received a lot of bad publicity to be free from elements that lean pro-life. All users who commit egregious violations of the site's core philosophy are immediately banned. Otherwise you just have to accept it for what it is or move on.