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Ventingi can never escape
Thread starterdefrauder9000
Start date
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i want to go, but my mind always says excuses to procrastinate "oh it's too late", "oh you're still fine", "they'll freak out and it'll just be more paperwork", "you're just gonna make them a burden" etc. etc.
It's completely irrational from a biological point of view to want to die (doesn't stop so many of us from wanting to die ). Maybe we all need irrational reasons to keep going? Whether it's procrasinating, or not doing it because you care about what a friend or family member would do if you did die. If you want to recover then you need a reason stronger than your urge to die.
I don't think I'll ever stop wanting to die, I saw it said on here that suicidality is like opening Pandora's Box. Once it's open (like when you've seriously considered suicide as an option or attempted it) that it cannot be closed. We'll forever be thinking about suicide and the urges will get weaker or stronger depending on internal and external factors. Recovery will always be about having more reasons to keep going than reasons not to.
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