Discussion How can you get a child?

[Mm80]

That's a huge perk to being female. No matter what happens, you can just marry up. Or if things get hard enough and cannot do the former, one can always sell their body tax-free.



It doesn't really work that way.

How does it work and were you not aware how it works before signing up ?

 

[Meditation guide]

That's a huge perk to being female. No matter what happens, you can just marry up. Or if things get hard enough and cannot do the former, one can always sell their body tax-free.

That sounds like the movie Pretty Woman. If only it were like that in real life.

Women are in very gritty abusive hard lives, suffering in silence, hidden away in the US. They have children they can't support with no help from anyone. Or they stay in terribly abusive relationships due to the kids. I don't think people realize the state of women's lives, especially now when daycare centers are mostly closed.

 

[Wayfaerer]

see this is exactly why i hate being female

I think if you were able to switch sides for a while, you'd want to go back. Don't take it personally, I don't resent women for it. After all, it's just nature. What does irritate me though is that we do not live in a natural environment any more and things are way off balance.

 

[Sinkinshyp]

I spent my life since I was 20 being a single mom. Older son would be 28 now- he died in a car accident at 25. HUGE part of my reason to CTB, I believe I will be reunited with him. We all have our beliefs- let me have mine about my afterlife.

I LOVED my children. Older son got spanked once for running in the road after a ball when he was about 4. Younger son never got spanked. I didn't physically or mentally abuse my children. I LOVED them. I was there for them in any way they needed me. Older son talked to me about everything wanting my approval or input. I did not abuse my kids in anyway. They were my life- and my reason to wake up and try to make things better every day. We weren't financially stable but we were comfortable we always had a roof over our heads, food to eat, computers, tv's and basic necessities.

Older son was popular in HS, the counselors all told me all the girls were flocked around J. He got his first job at 18 and his final one at 21. He became a foreman of a crew and LOVED the fact he worked hard for his money. He was very active in a car club. His passion was his car.. working on it attending meets shows. As described by his club he was humble, a true friend to many, honorable and someone they all should look up to and aspire to be more like him. He LOVED life- he enjoyed simple things like taking cloud pictures. He was that one guy who could make anyone laugh. Hi friends have said they miss his goofy facebook posts that made them laugh.. some still 3 yrs later admit to me looking at his page expecting to see one of his posts. Had he not passed in a car accident on his way to work he had a lot to offer this world and would have accomplished everything he had his goals set to.

younger son tested out top 17% nationwide for intelligence at 10. I was told expect the top 10% or better. He is VERY intelligent and an introvert. He is attracted to intelligence. He is not straight or gay. He will be 20 in a couple of months. He has a job and they are wanting to make him manager. He LOVES his job. Sadly, he was a couple months prior to turning 17 when his older brother died and I snapped from it. I really put him through a lot when he needed me to be the strongest. He lost his big bro and his mom as he knew her that day. He turned 18 and ran to my ex in laws. I wish I could be back in his life to grieve together, heal and move forward. I know there was damage done and I regret thinking it may prevent him from accomplishing what he has the potential to. He wants to join the army and get an education from there. He is looking to be an engineer of sorts, although he also looked into archaeologist.

Parents who abuse their kids- I would love to get my hands on them. I am not an angry violent person. Abuse of children make me angry and I could choke the life out of an abuser and not regret it one single bit. Some of us parents have children and love them. They become a happy person and live productive happy lives.

 

[Mm80]

because thats where the MAJORITY comes from. if they are in the upper class they can more likely afford it while the lower class cant and if they dont (which can and probably does happen) thats just bad parenting not so much circumstances.

Its not just money that makes somebody a good parent.
There are so many middle class people out there who were starved of love and attention and emotionally fucked up by their parents, because they were out trying to make more money to secure material comfort. (the parents meant well im sure)

 

[Life_and_Death]

I think if you were able to switch sides for a while, you'd want to go back. Don't take it personally, I don't resent women for it. After all, it's just nature. What does irritate me though is that we do not live in a natural environment any more and things are way off balance.

i just hate it because im a human to not just for sex, actually i hate sex and this and all the abuse i went through is why and my husband says its not but i feel that its putting a strain on our relationship :(

Its not just money that makes somebody a good parent.
There are so many middle class people out there who were starved of love and attention and emotionally fucked up by their parents, because they were out trying to make more money to secure material comfort.

i know this. my friend is one of them. you really are over thinking what is being said here.

 

[Wayfaerer]

That sounds like the movie Pretty Woman. If only it were like that in real life.

I think you're just referring to the former half of the statement I made? See below.

Unless you're not conventionally attractive. Then you're nothing but scum and society will treat you as such.

Maybe not as easy as those who are, true, but make up fixes a lot of those issues. Men are also not nearly as fickle as women are but again, that's just nature at work.

 

[Ghost2211]

I think if you were able to switch sides for a while, you'd want to go back. Don't take it personally, I don't resent women for it. After all, it's just nature. What does irritate me though is that we do not live in a natural environment any more and things are way off balance.

Being either sex sucks, but it is easier to be male.

 

[Wayfaerer]

I wish you knew my life story. As someone who was known for her looks. It's a double edged sword.

Keep in mind I am not speaking on an individual basis. I know women can have very hard lives just as men, I'm saying within the context of the over all picture.

 

[Ready2GoNow]

Maybe not as easy as those who are, true, but make up fixes a lot of those issues. Men are also not nearly as fickle as women are but again, that's just nature at work.

lol I assume you're male then? I'm a female who is not conventionally attractive. No amount of makeup stops men (complete strangers) from coming up to me on the street to inform me of my ugliness, completely unprovoked. You're severely misinformed.

Now tell me, when was the last time you were walking down the street minding your own business, and a random woman harassed you over your appearance to the point of reducing you to tears? But by all means, continue to spout that 'women have it easy' bs. Didn't expect to find a white guy with a victim complex on here, of all places.

Bottom line: unless you've been female yourself, you have no business speaking on our life experience. And vice versa. Life is shit for both sexes, that's why we're all here.

 

[Wayfaerer]

Being either sex sucks, but it is easier to be male.

Is that why men successfully die by suicide more often yet women make more attempts? Is that why women receive lesser punishment for the exact same crimes? Is that why men are much more likely to die by work accidents? Is that why women are given preferential status in family court? is that why infant males are subjected to sexual mutilation in US hospitals? Because they have it easier?

I mean it goes on, but I don't want to turn this into an argument.

 

[Wayfaerer]

I love being out in the woods. Do you know how often I can simply take a walk in the woods? Never. I don't have a male companion. Do you know what it's like for me to eat by myself in a restaurant? The pitying looks? Or to have to call and pay a handyman all the time for things I can't physically do? I would have liked to have a nice husband but not so lucky to find one. I'm unusually good with fixing almost anything, taking care of myself without help in spite of now being handicapped but still, my life was severely restricted as a female.

True, there are problems that women deal with that men generally do not.

 

[Ghost2211]

I love being out in the woods. Do you know how often I can simply take a walk in the woods? Never. I don't have a male companion. Do you know what it's like for me to eat by myself in a restaurant? The pitying looks? Or to have to call and pay a handyman all the time for things I can't physically do? I would have liked to have a nice husband but not so lucky to find one. I'm unusually good with fixing almost anything, taking care of myself without help in spite of now being handicapped but still, my life was severely restricted as a female.

Do you know how many times there have been men following me, masturbating in front of me in stores, grabbing me in public, rubbing on me while in line at the checkout in a store? On and on.

Don't forget the blessings of periods, uti, and menopause. Oh, and massive list of health issues after hormone loss.

 

[foxdie]

Whoa this thread took a turn lol. Can anyone make a convincing argument why having children is strictly a choice and not a biological imparative? Without appealing to modern contraceptives, morals or judging people? How is it a choice in the simplest terms? I don't understand.

 

[Meditation guide]

Don't forget the blessings of periods, uti, and menopause.

I once begged a new gynacologist to give me a hysterectomy due to unbearable periods and not only did he refuse but without anyone else in the room while he examined me stuck a red hot speculum up inside me and I screamed while he laughed. I have four other stories of things male doctors have done that are worse.

 

[Ghost2211]

I once begged a new gynacologist to give me a hysterectomy due to unbearable periods and not only did he refuse but without anyone else in the room while he examined me stuck a red hot speculum up inside me and I screamed while he laughed.

Wow, wtf.

 

[fat feet]

My parents are complete idiots especially my father now after he died the rest of my family feed me bullshit about inheritance
Basically all my life I was like a punch bag for this morons

Same.

Every time I see the thread title I think, "Kidnapping?"

Now that you say it. I was not sure what the narrative was.

 

[Wayfaerer]

Whoa this thread took a turn lol. Can anyone make a convincing argument why having children is strictly a choice and not a biological imparative? Without appealing to modern contraceptives, morals or judging people? How is it a choice in the simplest terms? I don't understand.

Because it is not essential to life for one. Sure, it's a hit to quality of life but it's not like you'll die if you don't have it.

 

[ZardozOmega]

Not everyone is fucked up like we are.

 

[Nature_is_God]

Wow, this thread has devolved in gender division. Everything is so divisive. Couldn't we just stick with the original topic at hand?

 

[foxdie]

Because it is not essential to life for one. Sure, it's a hit to quality of life but it's not like you'll die if you don't have it.

You seems to be thinking about this on very individualistic terms. I'm talking about our species biological drive to survive. Birth rates are way down in countries with low infant mortality rates and higher in those with the opposite. It not about quality of life, it's just about life, continuing our species. I'm getting pretty abstract here too. Children are people too and can be very fun if they're not yours and you can play hide and go seek with them but then you can go home after lol

 

[Mm80]

Again, I am being misrepresented. I am speaking not of working class people but of irresponsible working class people. The kind that probably don't even work and just collect government cheddar and have children because it brings them more benefits, you know, exactly the kind of people who have never touched a book in their life.

I have no issue with people who have kids that they can comfortably take care of regardless of income bracket. A mistake happens? Okay, fine. Two? That's enough. Five? Seven? Ten?? In that case, don't expect society to pick up the tab for you.

Yeah your probably right.
Im confusing my own personal issue with the discussion.
Im working class but have only had the one child deliberately, always tried to follow the law, go to work and be what is seen as a good citizen. I just sometimes feel that being that way has gone against me and not helped me. My issue.
But im aware that there is a stereotype and truth in it, that a lot of working class people do have lots of kids irresponsibly and generally dont care.
Apologies and thanks for pointing it out @Ĺife

 

[Wayfaerer]

Yeah your probably right.
Im confusing my own personal issue with the discussion.
Im working class but have only had the one child deliberately, always tried to follow the law, go to work and be what is seen as a good citizen. I just sometimes feel that being that way has gone against me and not helped me. My issue.
But im aware that there is a stereotype and truth in it, that a lot of working class people do have lots of kids irresponsibly and generally dont care.
Apologies and thanks for pointing it out @Ĺife

Yes, exactly. You're good, we weren't talking about you.

 

[Mm80]

Yes, exactly. You're good, we weren't talking about you.

No i know but i objected to your point on out of my personal issues.

 

[Wayfaerer]

You seems to be thinking about this on very individualistic terms. I'm talking about our species biological drive to survive. Birth rates are way down in countries with low infant mortality rates and higher in those with the opposite. It not about quality of life, it's just about life, continuing our species. I'm getting pretty abstract here too. Children are people too and can be very fun if they're not yours and you can play hide and go seek with them but then you can go home after lol

Okay I misunderstood. Still had those welfare leeches on the mind... Yes on the societal level breeding is unavoidable. Antinatalists that expect everyone to stop breeding because it's "unethical" are just delusional.

 

[Life_and_Death]

Apologies and thanks for pointing it out @Ĺife

its cool :) misunderstanding and things like this happen. what matters is how you handle them

 

[woxihuanni]

We all survive how we must. I love him, tow the line, make the babies, care for the house and family, and have no financial freedom or life of my own. Welcome to being a female with no other skills or value than your body.

All of that you are doing is precious and worthy of respect. You have multiple jobs, he has one.

 

[foxdie]

All of that you are doing is precious and worthy of respect. You have multiple jobs, he has one.

But even this is even a second order issue. Can you just explain how it's a choice? I'm willing to be convinced if you can. Biology still applies on the individual whether you think you could overcome it or not.

 

[woxihuanni]

But even this is even a second order issue. Can you just explain how it's a choice? I'm willing to be convinced if you can. Biology still applies on the individual whether you think you could overcome it or not.

I don't understand how your reply relates to my post. Did you mean it for me?

 

[XYZ]

That argument is weak, if anything

No, you are incorrect.

@Life_and_Death made a perfectly valid point and the fact that you do not aknowledge their argument, proves to me that you are disingenuous and most likely created an account on SS to stir up shit on purpose.

(The Ignore button is a beautiful thing!)