Discussion How can you get a child?

[Mm80]

My children are loved, valued, respected, and live an upper middle class life. I don't beat them or berate them. I hug them and tell them I love them every day. I'm depressed and get over stimulated easily, but I do my best every day and manage to not kill myself despite my urges.

Tell me what I'm doing that is "evil"

An upper class middle life.
The key to happiness..
Lord knows what they would feel like if they were brought up working class.
Not sure why it matters that they are middle class, sounds like snobbery at its finest, oart of the reason people dont feel good enough in the first place.

 

[Wayfaerer]

I've had unprotected sex when I didn't want to have a baby and I'm not dumb.

wow no, that's not what I was implying at all. I am referring to the lower classes that have, like, a dozen kids that they can't afford. I suppose I could've worded that better...

 

[Meditation guide]

I am referring to the lower classes that have, like, a dozen kids that they can't afford.

That smacks of some very condescending attitude. Sorry I know you mean well but honestly. I won't justify that with an attempt at reasoning with you as it would be futile.

 

[BitterlyAlive]

My children are loved, valued, respected, and live an upper middle class life. I don't beat them or berate them. I hug them and tell them I love them every day. I'm depressed and get over stimulated easily, but I do my best every day and manage to not kill myself despite my urges.

Tell me what I'm doing that is "evil"

I agree. I personally don't like the idea of having children and bringing them into this world, BUT that doesn't mean that no one else can. Ya know? It's a personal issue, but who am I to dictate others? Especially the wonderful parents like you and my sibling.

 

[Ghost2211]

An upper class middle life.
The key to happiness..
Lord knows what they would feel like if they were brought up working class.
Not sure why it matters that they are middle class, sounds like snobbery at its finest, oart of the reason people dont feel good enough in the first place.

It's the truth of how this society works. They will have a better life due to free golden ticket to Ivy colleges, and connections into good careers. I didn't get that start in life and I got abuse and sexual trauma, and then no ability to get a job this society values enough to earn a real living wage. I grew up in a poor family that abused us because they were angry at life. Yes, social status does matter for quality of life, and yes I know shit happens to the kids in the upper class as well but not as much.

 

[Life_and_Death]

It's the truth of how this society works.

for the most part i agree. theres definitely less to worry about, like bills, food, poverty, ect but any class of society comes with their problems. and even forgetting the outside problems like the things i named off, it doesnt matter where you come from in life theres still abuse and trauma.

im not exactly sure what i am but i know i dont live on the street but i also dont live in a mansion so i cant really speak to there being less but i dont think so.....i just think its a different kind

 

[Mm80]

wow no, that's not what I was implying at all. I am referring to the lower classes that have, like, a dozen kids that they can't afford. I suppose I could've worded that better...

So this is just a class issue?
That simple
All lower class people are stupid and have lots of kids that they cant afford, And dont or cant read books.
Middle or upper class people dont have as many kids and read books.
But if they fancy having a load of kids its ok because they can afford it.
Makes you wonder why middle class people suffer from depression just as much as anyone else. Some of them even ctb. How bizzare.

 

[Life_and_Death]

So this is just a class issue?
That simple
All lower class people are stupid and have lots of kids that they cant afford, And dont or cant read books.
Middle or upper class people dont have as many kids and read books.
But if they fancy having a load of kids its ok because they can afford it.
Makes you wonder why middle class people suffer from depression just as much as anyone else. Some of them even ctb. How bizzare.

i think you are taking what they are saying and looking at it from a different view then what they are trying to explain

 

[Mm80]

It's the truth of how this society works. They will have a better life due to free golden ticket to Ivy colleges, and connections into good careers. I didn't get that start in life and I got abuse and sexual trauma, and then no ability to get a job this society values enough to earn a real living wage. I grew up in a poor family that abused us because they were angry at life. Yes, social status does matter for quality of life, and yes I know shit happens to the kids in the upper class as well but not as much.

So how are you raising a middle to upper class family with your social status and not being able to get a well paying job?

 

[Brick In The Wall]

Honestly the title of this post just gives me really weird vibes...

That's exactly what I was thinking.

More on topic though, I'm the parent of two lovely young boys who are well taken care of and enjoying life. I don't regret it and I don't care what anyone thinks about it.

 

[Mm80]

i think you are taking what they are saying and looking at it from a different view then what they are trying to explain

Im taking one comment...
Wow no, that's not what I was implying at all. I am referring to the lower classes that have, like, a dozen kids that they can't afford
Its an incredibly unjust generalisation. The same person also implied earlier that working class people dont read books.

 

[Wayfaerer]

So this is just a class issue?
That simple
All lower class people are stupid and have lots of kids that they cant afford, And dont or cant read books.
Middle or upper class people dont have as many kids and read books.
But if they fancy having a load of kids its ok because they can afford it.
Makes you wonder why middle class people suffer from depression just as much as anyone else. Some of them even ctb. How bizzare.

Again, I am being misrepresented. I am speaking not of working class people but of irresponsible working class people. The kind that probably don't even work and just collect government cheddar and have children because it brings them more benefits, you know, exactly the kind of people who have never touched a book in their life.

I have no issue with people who have kids that they can comfortably take care of regardless of income bracket. A mistake happens? Okay, fine. Two? That's enough. Five? Seven? Ten?? In that case, don't expect society to pick up the tab for you.

 

[Life_and_Death]

Im taking one comment...
Wow no, that's not what I was implying at all. I am referring to the lower classes that have, like, a dozen kids that they can't afford
Its an incredibly unjust generalisation. The same person also implied earlier that working class people dont read books.

i never said you were implying anything i simply said that you seem to be looking at it from a different point of view

 

[Ghost2211]

So how are you raising a middle to upper class family with your social status and not being able to get a well paying job?

Lol I'm sure you'll love this one.... married a man with a good job.

 

[Mm80]

Lol I'm sure you'll love this one.... married a man with a good job.

Thought so.
Well done.

 

[Meditation guide]

I am speaking not of working class people but of irresponsible working class people. The kind that probably don't even work and just collect government cheddar and have children because it brings them more benefits, you know, exactly the kind of people who have never touched a book in their life.

It's not so simple as poor people being irresponsible and shiftless. It's a whole set of things that they do not have access to like middle class people take for granted.

For example one time I drove a penniless 17 year old girl all over town late at night trying to find some place to fill her prescription for birth control pills. She didn't even have a way to pay a doctor for the prescription. She had no way to get the pills unless I drove her. She lived with her boyfriend who was also penniless. It was not her fault she had gotten pregnant earlier and had a child she had to give up for adoption. She was practically homeless and was living in a tiny trailer with three other people including her boyfriend, almost freezing to death in below freezing weather in a blizzard and they couldn't afford heat.

She was in line to get pregnant over and over and over again without so much as a doctor, a way to get birth control, or even keep a roof over her head in the winter. It's a whole setup to have unwanted pregnancies that poor people face.

 

[Wayfaerer]

It's not so simple as poor people being irresponsible and shiftless. It's a whole set of things that they do not have access to like middle class people take for granted.

I think I see where you're going with this. Perhaps in places like Mexico where it's generally very low-income and catholicism is rampant I can understand how getting access to contraceptives and abortion would be impossible. Okay, granted, but that still happens here in the first world where there is access. I think birth control is something that should be covered by the government but only those below a certain income threshold, it'd probably be worth it in the end financially.

 

[Ghost2211]

Thought so.
Well done.

We all survive how we must. I love him, tow the line, make the babies, care for the house and family, and have no financial freedom or life of my own. Welcome to being a female with no other skills or value than your body.

 

[Mm80]

i never said you were implying anything i simply said that you seem to be looking at it from a different point of view

My point of view is that just because someone isnt born into money or a middle class, doesnt mean that they will have lots of kids that they cant afford, and not seek an education.
These kind of class assumptions can actually cause depression for young people trying to get on in life. I didnt think id see the assumptions on here, just tbought those opinions would be reserved to middle class snobs who think they are inheritantly better than others.

 

[Meditation guide]

Perhaps in places like Mexico where it's generally very low-income and catholicism is rampant I can understand how getting access to contraceptives and abortion would be impossible

I had to pay the doctor bill and find a place to get her pills and pay for them. It's not Mexico I'm talking about, it's right here in the US. Do you know there are people who don't have doctors, don't have insurance, can't pay a doctor and have no transportation?

Everyone should be required to do volunteer work with the homeless to see how they live.

 

[Life_and_Death]

My point of view is that just because someone isnt born into money or a middle class, doesnt mean that they will have lots of kids that they cant afford, and not seek an education.
These kind of class assumptions can actually cause depression for young people trying to get on in life. I didnt think id see the assumptions on here, just tbought those opinions would be reserved to middle class snobs who think they are inheritantly better than others.

see i dont think thats what they are saying at all. i think they are taking about the people that do not everyone from that class just the select few

 

[Mm80]

We all survive how we must. I love him, tow the line, make the babies, care for the house and family, and have no financial freedom or life of my own. Welcome to being a female with no other skills or value than your body.

I thought you would have financial freedom and a wonderful life if you have married into an upper middle class life style ?

 

[Ready2GoNow]

I don't think it's evil to have kids. The majority of people actually enjoy life and are perfectly content with being here... Sadly I'm not one of them. But I don't think that makes all parents evil, only those who abuse their children.

 

[Wayfaerer]

We all survive how we must. I love him, tow the line, make the babies, care for the house and family, and have no financial freedom or life of my own. Welcome to being a female with no other skills or value than your body.

That's a huge perk to being female. No matter what happens, you can just marry up. Or if things get hard enough and cannot do the former, one can always sell their body tax-free.

I thought you would have financial freedom and a wonderful life if you have married into an upper middle class life style ?

It doesn't really work that way.

 

[Life_and_Death]

That's a huge perk to being female. No matter what happens, you can just marry up.

see this is exactly why i hate being female

 

[Ghost2211]

I thought you would have financial freedom and a wonderful life if you have married into an upper middle class life style ?

Yeah I like fairytales too.

 

[Soulless Angel]

I don't think it's evil to have kids. The majority of people actually enjoy life and are perfectly content with being here... Sadly I'm not one of them. But I don't think that makes all parents evil, only those who abuse their children.

I'm a fucking shit parent, I shouldn't have reproduced, but damn my life then was *perfect*

 

[Mm80]

see i dont think thats what they are saying at all. i think they are taking about the people that do not everyone from that class just the select few

So that logic would imply that nobody from the upper classes have too many children and tgey are all educated.
Otherwise it wouldnt just have been the working class mentioned.?
All that had to be said was that some people have more kids than they can healthily raise. Im not sure why a class had to come into it.

 

[Ready2GoNow]

That's a huge perk to being female. No matter what happens, you can just marry up.

Unless you're not conventionally attractive. Then you're nothing but scum and society will treat you as such.

 

[Life_and_Death]

So that logic would imply that nobody from the upper classes have too many children and tgey are all educated.
Otherwise it wouldnt just have been the working class mentioned.?
All that had to be said was that some people have more kids than they can healthily raise. Im not sure why a class had to come into it.

because thats where the MAJORITY comes from. if they are in the upper class they can more likely afford it while the lower class cant and if they dont (which can and probably does happen) thats just bad parenting not so much circumstances.