Story Horrible SN Experience

[johann_liebert]

Disclaimer: I'm not doing this to bash Sodium Nitrite just stating my experiences with it, as this was a really unexpected outcome and to tell people a bit from the other side, as the positive ones of SN are really glorified here, but the negative ones are much less known.


Short version: On 31st January, I did a 2nd CTB attempt with some of the SN I had left from my first attempt on 11th January. But I wasn't using enough, as I was interrupted by a phone call and ended up with acute renal failure in the hospital.


The long version:
How do I start, after my first failed SN attempt that I also captured on here, I didn't expect to ever overcome the SI to actually CTB with Sodium Nitrite. I was searching for different methods but couldn't find anything good, and after reading in some posts on here that the SN is still good for almost three months after it was opened, I started again playing with the idea of using the SN method more and more.

On 30th January I fasted for almost 20 hours, took all the meds I had (Ibu and Vomex), but I slept for too long, and was worried that when my father would come home from work, he would find my unconscious but not yet dead body and I get rescued and end up as a brain-damaged vegetable.

I ate one meal and then fasted again for almost 20 hours until the next day, 31st January. This time I woke up early enough, to have these 4+ hours to be definitely dead time, until my father would come home from work. I took the meds, prepared three SN shots and just sit there on my desk, where I'm currently writing this post, and see what happens.

I took the shot on my mouth and tasted the seawater-like tasting SN. This point I also reached in my first SN attempt. I took a bit in my mouth and swallowed it and immediately noticed the stomach growling, I also had on my first attempt where only a drop got in my stomach. I was sitting there with my head resting in my arm, after a while I took another bigger (maybe soup spoon like) sip of the SN shot. My heart began racing and everything became cloudy, but not because I was scared. I was instead just really surprised, because I was genuinely ready to now drink the rest of it and die, and if I hadn't been interrupted by a stupid phone call by my grandmother, I would have probably done that.

I was so thrown out by that, that I ditched the attempt and thought I'll just try it the next day again.

However, after I went to the toilet, I noticed something is different. After I urinated, I still had a very strong urge to urinate. Now, the next couple of days, but especially the day of the attempt and the day after, should be the worst, hell on earth days of my life. As I experienced during these days almost every symptom of a renal failure.

I had a constant terrorizing strong urge to pee. When I peed, it felt like my bladder would implode. I would wake up multiple times at night because of that strong urge to pee. I had diarrhea for a few days. My body was so weak, I felt like I would collapse every moment. My skin itched horribly. I had constant headaches, muscle spasms, was freezing all the time. I thought now it's really all over.

Now the thing is I already had before problems with my bladder, but they were only psychologically and a symptom of my SAD. For some people, anxiety makes them pee. And for me, that constant urge to pee ruined my life.

On 5th February, by that time most of the renal failure symptoms were gone, but I still made an appointment at my doctor's office telling him of my SN attempt, knowing that it would be a one way ticket to the psych ward. But that's a price I was willing to pay, as I didn't want to end up with permanently damaged kidney's or whatever, even though I was still determined to end my life in that time. In the worst case I would have to undergo dialysis where I would have been catheterized, what I was really afraid of as this is supposed to be very painful, especially for men.

But instead in the dialysis apartment, I immediately ended up in the psychiatry. As I'm from Germany, the psych wards, even the closed ones, aren't nearly such nightmare places as what the American users here described theirs. But I was even luckier with the doctor that I caught. I described her the motivation behind my suicidal tendencies, that I just decided for myself, that living a life with such limitations is just not worth it. And with such a well researched method, (most of them never even heard about Sodium Nitrite) and the fact I came there voluntarily, it was obvious that I wasn't a good fit for the closed one. So that very empathetic doctor send me to an open one with more normal people and less restrictions.

During that three week psych ward stay, I was still using an irritable bladder medication that I already started using shortly before my SN attempt. I got a side effect from it, that made my bladder, and the whole area around it feel kinda numbed, I wouldn't even notice something when I peed, what felt very weird. But because of that numb feeling, I noticed this constant urge to urinate SAD symptom much less, and started behaving more normal and less OCD-like and anxious as I did the 8 years prior. I made because of that, a bigger jump in my mental problems in a few days, than psychotherapy did for me in a year. This is what gave me the hope for my life back.

On 27th February I switched from a full stationary stay to a partial stationary hospital where I would sleep at home and go there in the morning and leave in the evening, like an 9-to-5 job, idk how this is called in English.

On 2nd April I was also released from there, and now I use my new won freedom to do all the things I was excluded off the past 8 years. Getting a job, and hopefully very soon moving out from my toxic family, meeting old friends and see what the world has to offer for me. Though, it's not easy as I still suffer from the anxious bladder and other symptoms, just not that strong like before. And we don't have to start talking about the all the things you miss, when you live in social isolation from age 17 to 24. Plus, the world and its citizens are as shitty as they used to be, as far as I can tell, from my short observations.

Still, I would have never thought that this SN attempt and the psych ward stay would end with, that I try to seriously give my life a second chance. And everything just because of the side effect of a stupid and otherwise useless bladder medication.


The last part of my post, I want to use to thank from the bottom of my heart the user @SofterSoftest and his or her posts in the thread https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/sn-and-brain-damage.95638/ as they were giving me lots of hope and clarity in this really, really horrible few days of my life.

And @tarococo who I stayed in contact with for 2 weeks, a few days before my final SN attempt, until she seemingly vanished. Her WhatsApp is no longer active, so I guess that means it. I'm very sorry you had to take this way, (if you have really taken it) as you were a really great person, that just was forced to live in horrible life circumcisions, that had much more potential and chances to do something out of her life than me.


During my psych ward stay I ordered a new bottle of Sodium Nitrite as I still think it's the best method available. However, after such a horrible experience, I hopefully will never again come to such a desperate point that I will seriously consider taking it, now knowing the consequences if I fail.

Thanks for reading, and feel free to ask me any question you want. Without you guys, I would have probably been left with much bigger scars of my suicidal journey!

 

[Justnotme]

First of all, I'm incredibly sorry that you had to experience such pain and disappointment.
My words sound corny.
I can't imagine how scared you were when this happened to you...

You wrote that you would still consider this method if you needed it..
So are you ready to feel how your kidneys failed again?
That is, is it possible to endure this pain in principle?

Tell me, please, how many points would you rate abdominal pain?
And how many points would you rate kidney pain?

And you didn't lose consciousness, am I right?

 

[DreamEnd]

damn I'm sorry you had to go through that. Looks like taking the whole sn drink in one big gulp is imperative to succeed

 

[Chronosphere]

Sipping deadly poison like it's a whisky isn't good idea. Noted.

 

[johann_liebert]

You wrote that you would still consider this method if you needed it..

I really hope not. But the thing is, even during the kidney failure days, nothing was different about my life, then it was before. As my psyche already completely destroyed everything. And I just feel safe having it. But I obviously would much rather prefer a loaded gun in my wardrobe.

Tell me, please, how many points would you rate abdominal pain?
And how many points would you rate kidney pain?

I'm not sure how I'm supposed to rate this. When I urinated, it was really painful. But the psychological terror of this strong urge to pee is what really made it horrible, not the physical renal failure symptoms. Can you even feel your kidneys?

And no, I didn't lose consciousness at any point. And thanks for your otherwise kind words.

 

[LunarLight]

Sorry you had to go through this. But it was for the best after all, as you're giving life a second chance now.

 

[johann_liebert]

damn I'm sorry you had to go through that. Looks like taking the whole sn drink in one big gulp is imperative to succeed

Yes, But even then you could still just vomit it out and not die from it, but still have some sort of internal injuries from it, like what happened to the OP of the post I linked at the bottom of my post.

Sipping deadly poison like it's a whisky isn't good idea. Noted.

Bro, that's not some shot you just drink and never think about it again. No matter how desperate and ready to die you are, it will cost you so much nerves to overcome the SI and to drink that deadly poison.

 

[rozeske]

This is why it is reported again and again to not taste your SN or take just a few sips of it. It is a poison and a deadlyone at that, if you don't take enough to kill you there is expected damage. It's like interrupting the dying process. You can never tell how far damage is done or if any.

 

[FuneralCry]

That really does sound so horrible and torturous what you went through, I'm sorry you had to suffer so much as a result of that. But anyway best wishes.

 

[johann_liebert]

reported again and again

I have never read anything moderately critical of the SN method. And I have read lots of posts on here.

 

[rozeske]

I have never read anything moderately critical of the SN method. And I have read lots of posts on here.

Yes, there aren't much reports criticising the SN method because it's a solid plan if you follow the regimen properly. But that is not what my replay was about. Please refer above

 

[johann_liebert]

Yes, there aren't much reports criticising the SN method because it's a solid plan if you follow the regimen properly. But that is not what my replay was about. Please refer above

The message I got, after reading all the SN megathreads, guides and posts, is that the worst that could happen is that you just vomit your whole guts out, or if your such an unlucky little twit that gets rescued in this short moment where your unconscious and the oxygen starts leaving your brain but not fully dead yet and end up as a vegetable.
This was an interesting case for me: https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/testing-sn-how-to-get-to-hospital-fast.74903

 

[Unknown21]

I find that this condition has occurred before, namely urinary system problems. The op also mentioned the reason for the failure, which was not drinking enough SN.

 

[johann_liebert]

You can tell critics instead of just rolling their eyes, they can add that and other such stories to the megathreads and stop selling SN here as the ultimate, side effect free, golden way out. This is not some World of Warcraft forum, many desperate people at an absolute low point of their lives come here and search for an easy way out. And when you keep indoctrinate them into the SN method as everything is fine as long you follow the PPeH and suppress everything remotely negative and critical to it, you will keep reading such stories of people that had to learn it the hard way by themselves.

 

[Evolution9]

Did you even test the sn after the 3 months(or even test it at all in the first place when it arrived )? Acquarium or blood ? You never mentioned the amount of SN used in a cup or how much of it you took.Did the container remained open for the whole 3 months or it was closed? So many questions .
Why should they add your story when the outcome is your fault ?

 

[rozeske]

Any method including the SN method needs to be researched very well before going through with it. What helps with the effectiveness of the method, what steps you need to follow, What makes the method fail and what are the consequences of failure.
Anyone who has done their research and read all the threads about SN, would not conclude that the SN method is the ultimate, side effect free, golden way out. Anyone who has read the SN regimen guide wouldn't decide to take it in such manner and criticize the method or anyone else for that matter. Ultimately we all need to do our own researches and decided what is best for us.

 

[Evolution9]

+ it has been repeated so many times,if you dont take the full amount of sn needed but just a sip and then decide to ditch the attempt you need to call an ambulance anyway,its poison.

 

[Wineeverynight]

Short version: On 31st January, I did a 2nd CTB attempt with some of the SN I had left from my first attempt on 11th January. But I wasn't using enough, as I was interrupted by a phone call and ended up with acute renal failure in the hospital.

Dude, so sorry for this. I can imagine the mental anguish was as much pain as the physical. It won't be overnight, but I hope you feel better in some way. Hugs.

 

[TheDruBo]

Disclaimer: I'm not doing this to bash Sodium Nitrite just stating my experiences with it, as this was a really unexpected outcome and to tell people a bit from the other side, as the positive ones of SN are really glorified here, but the negative ones are much less known.


Short version: On 31st January, I did a 2nd CTB attempt with some of the SN I had left from my first attempt on 11th January. But I wasn't using enough, as I was interrupted by a phone call and ended up with acute renal failure in the hospital.


The long version:
How do I start, after my first failed SN attempt that I also captured on here, I didn't expect to ever overcome the SI to actually CTB with Sodium Nitrite. I was searching for different methods but couldn't find anything good, and after reading in some posts on here that the SN is still good for almost three months after it was opened, I started again playing with the idea of using the SN method more and more.

On 30th January I fasted for almost 20 hours, took all the meds I had (Ibu and Vomex), but I slept for too long, and was worried that when my father would come home from work, he would find my unconscious but not yet dead body and I get rescued and end up as a brain-damaged vegetable.

I ate one meal and then fasted again for almost 20 hours until the next day, 31st January. This time I woke up early enough, to have these 4+ hours to be definitely dead time, until my father would come home from work. I took the meds, prepared three SN shots and just sit there on my desk, where I'm currently writing this post, and see what happens.

I took the shot on my mouth and tasted the seawater-like tasting SN. This point I also reached in my first SN attempt. I took a bit in my mouth and swallowed it and immediately noticed the stomach growling, I also had on my first attempt where only a drop got in my stomach. I was sitting there with my head resting in my arm, after a while I took another bigger (maybe soup spoon like) sip of the SN shot. My heart began racing and everything became cloudy, but not because I was scared. I was instead just really surprised, because I was genuinely ready to now drink the rest of it and die, and if I hadn't been interrupted by a stupid phone call by my grandmother, I would have probably done that.

I was so thrown out by that, that I ditched the attempt and thought I'll just try it the next day again.

However, after I went to the toilet, I noticed something is different. After I urinated, I still had a very strong urge to urinate. Now, the next couple of days, but especially the day of the attempt and the day after, should be the worst, hell on earth days of my life. As I experienced during these days almost every symptom of a renal failure.

I had a constant terrorizing strong urge to pee. When I peed, it felt like my bladder would implode. I would wake up multiple times at night because of that strong urge to pee. I had diarrhea for a few days. My body was so weak, I felt like I would collapse every moment. My skin itched horribly. I had constant headaches, muscle spasms, was freezing all the time. I thought now it's really all over.

Now the thing is I already had before problems with my bladder, but they were only psychologically and a symptom of my SAD. For some people, anxiety makes them pee. And for me, that constant urge to pee ruined my life.

On 5th February, by that time most of the renal failure symptoms were gone, but I still made an appointment at my doctor's office telling him of my SN attempt, knowing that it would be a one way ticket to the psych ward. But that's a price I was willing to pay, as I didn't want to end up with permanently damaged kidney's or whatever, even though I was still determined to end my life in that time. In the worst case I would have to undergo dialysis where I would have been catheterized, what I was really afraid of as this is supposed to be very painful, especially for men.

But instead in the dialysis apartment, I immediately ended up in the psychiatry. As I'm from Germany, the psych wards, even the closed ones, aren't nearly such nightmare places as what the American users here described theirs. But I was even luckier with the doctor that I caught. I described her the motivation behind my suicidal tendencies, that I just decided for myself, that living a life with such limitations is just not worth it. And with such a well researched method, (most of them never even heard about Sodium Nitrite) and the fact I came there voluntarily, it was obvious that I wasn't a good fit for the closed one. So that very empathetic doctor send me to an open one with more normal people and less restrictions.

During that three week psych ward stay, I was still using an irritable bladder medication that I already started using shortly before my SN attempt. I got a side effect from it, that made my bladder, and the whole area around it feel kinda numbed, I wouldn't even notice something when I peed, what felt very weird. But because of that numb feeling, I noticed this constant urge to urinate SAD symptom much less, and started behaving more normal and less OCD-like and anxious as I did the 8 years prior. I made because of that, a bigger jump in my mental problems in a few days, than psychotherapy did for me in a year. This is what gave me the hope for my life back.

On 27th February I switched from a full stationary stay to a partial stationary hospital where I would sleep at home and go there in the morning and leave in the evening, like an 9-to-5 job, idk how this is called in English.

On 2nd April I was also released from there, and now I use my new won freedom to do all the things I was excluded off the past 8 years. Getting a job, and hopefully very soon moving out from my toxic family, meeting old friends and see what the world has to offer for me. Though, it's not easy as I still suffer from the anxious bladder and other symptoms, just not that strong like before. And we don't have to start talking about the all the things you miss, when you live in social isolation from age 17 to 24. Plus, the world and its citizens are as shitty as they used to be, as far as I can tell, from my short observations.

Still, I would have never thought that this SN attempt and the psych ward stay would end with, that I try to seriously give my life a second chance. And everything just because of the side effect of a stupid and otherwise useless bladder medication.


The last part of my post, I want to use to thank from the bottom of my heart the user @SofterSoftest and his or her posts in the thread https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/sn-and-brain-damage.95638/ as they were giving me lots of hope and clarity in this really, really horrible few days of my life.

And @tarococo who I stayed in contact with for 2 weeks, a few days before my final SN attempt, until she seemingly vanished. Her WhatsApp is no longer active, so I guess that means it. I'm very sorry you had to take this way, (if you have really taken it) as you were a really great person, that just was forced to live in horrible life circumcisions, that had much more potential and chances to do something out of her life than me.


During my psych ward stay I ordered a new bottle of Sodium Nitrite as I still think it's the best method available. However, after such a horrible experience, I hopefully will never again come to such a desperate point that I will seriously consider taking it, now knowing the consequences if I fail.

Thanks for reading, and feel free to ask me any question you want. Without you guys, I would have probably been left with much bigger scars of my suicidal journey!

Can I ask what was the irritable bladder medication you used?

 

[LaVieEnRose]

Then you can tell him instead of just rolling his eyes, he can add that and other such stories to the megathreads and stop selling SN here as the ultimate, side effect free, golden way out. This is not some World of Warcraft forum, many desperate people at an absolute low point of their lives come here and search for an easy way out. And when you keep indoctrinate them into the SN method as everything is fine as long you follow the PPeH and suppress everything remotely negative and critical to it, you will keep reading such stories of people that had to learn it the hard way by themselves.

I'm sorry for your experience. But that member has never done that in the slightest, ever.

 

[Aprilfarewell4]

People follow protocol and do consumption correctly, they should be fine to go. These kind of things I think really put people off who are already struggling. It's good to share your story, but people really need to know that if done right, it's effective.

 

[johann_liebert]

Did you even test the sn after the 3 months(or even test it at all in the first place when it arrived )? Acquarium or blood ? You never mentioned the amount of SN used in a cup or how much of it you took.Did the container remained open for the whole 3 months or it was closed? So many questions .
Why should they add your story when the outcome is your fault ?

That's why I wrote, feel free to ask me any question about it you want. The SN had 99% purity and was of a very trustable and reliable polish seller many got their SN from here. I made 3 shots with 40 ml water and 15gm SN in each. The amount of SN that reached my body was at maybe 1-2 gm (e. g. the person from this thread drank 2gm SN in a 250ML coke and ended up in the hospital). And it wasn't 3 months, but 3 weeks between first and second attempt. The exact half-life is 82.3 days. That means until around this time the amount of sodium nitrite is halved. I even scratched the SN from the back just to make sure. Yes, it was closed and stored in a dark, cool spot in my wardrobe. Of course, it is my fault, but I'm just saying this is something that could happen if something doesn't go as planned. And when you CTB there can always go something wrong or unexpected happen.

Any method including the SN method needs to be researched very well before going through with it. What helps with the effectiveness of the method, what steps you need to follow, What makes the method fail and what are the consequences of failure.
Anyone who has done their research and read all the threads about SN, would not conclude that the SN method is the ultimate, side effect free, golden way out. Anyone who has read the SN regimen guide wouldn't decide to take it in such manner and criticize the method or anyone else for that matter. Ultimately we all need to do our own researches and decided what is best for us.

Yes, and this is exactly why I shared this story. Because after my impression SN is glamorized a bit too much on here and depending on the person you could get the impression that it is such a side effect free golden way out. And before seriously considering it as your CTB method, you should be aware of the possible negative outcomes, as with any other method.

Can I ask what was the irritable bladder medication you used?

An OAB anticholinergic called Oxybutynin.

I'm sorry for your experience. But that member has never done that in the slightest, ever.

Never said he did that. And I even read some of his threads (after my attempt, though) and they were informative for me. One of the few that showed the other site of SN here.

 

[Relic]

The only hospital you ended up in was the mental hospital? And renal failure was the official diagnosis? If you don't mind sharing, what were the ICD codes given? There have been other young people here describing discomfort after a failed attempt, but I don't know if any of them ended up going to the hospital.

 

[Argo]

The real issue here is suicide is extremely serious, but people in an actively suicidal situation have suffered so much to get to that point, that it's very rare to line up the required attitude and care needed for suicide with the act itself.

Just think about it. There's the stress of dying in a world that is hostile to your choice to go. There's all the negative possible consequences of being discovered, stopped, the psychiatric hell of being institutionalized, unknowns about what can go wrong with your method. All the trauma of life crushing down on you, all the recent negative emotions that most likely led one to say "Enough, I'm going to try". Guilt, regret, anxiety, frustration...

What about the paradox around feeling hopeless, feeling like things are meaningless, to feeling like one often doesn't matter or has low worth, to wishing suffering ends(implying things *must* matter, because otherwise death vs. life would be totally trivial and uninteresting as choices)? And how that plays into a process as serious as dying in, again, a hostile and uncertain world? On one hand many suicidal people feel they don't matter, yet they're supposed to take diligent care of themselves and their actions in the process of dying?

That is just a superficial picture, it gets much worse and more complicated than that. That is hard. People don't talk enough about this part of the problem, and since we don't, there's just not enough of a connection to the preparedness or the seriousness that one needs for something like suicide. It's like managing a nuclear reactor. It's very serious, but imagine if the people who were actually managing the most tense nuclear reactor situations in reality were highly traumatized, deeply suffering and exhausted individuals. Imagine if there was almost no pointing out of this as a problem. Would that not be a major issue?

 

[johann_liebert]

The only hospital you ended up in was the mental hospital? And renal failure was the official diagnosis? If you don't mind sharing, what were the ICD codes given? There have been other young people here describing discomfort after a failed attempt, but I don't know if any of them ended up going to the hospital.

Yeah, because of a big mistake my doctor made. He wrote me two emergency hospital referral letters (idk what this is in English called) and both were for a psychiatry. Only in one was written 'with connection to the kidney department'. If he directly gave me one for a physical department, I would have right away been sent there and physically checked up if everything is okay. Instead, I was sitting for over a week in a stupid psych ward worrying what's going on with me.

Well, my doctor agreed with my assumptions that my kidney's got very likely some damage from it. I haven't yet gotten the hospital letter with all the diagnosis, but I doubt there will be anything physical written in there, as I was only in psychiatric stations.

The real issue here is suicide is extremely serious, but people in an actively suicidal situation have suffered so much to get to that point, that it's very rare to line up the required attitude and care needed for suicide with the act itself.

Just think about it. There's the stress of dying in a world that is hostile to your choice to go. There's all the negative possible consequences of being discovered, stopped, the psychiatric hell of being institutionalized, unknowns about what can go wrong with your method. All the trauma of life crushing down on you, all the recent negative emotions that most likely led one to say "Enough, I'm going to try". Guilt, regret, anxiety, frustration...

What about the paradox around feeling hopeless, feeling like things are meaningless, to feeling like one often doesn't matter or has low worth, to wishing suffering ends(implying things *must* matter, because otherwise death vs. life would be totally trivial and uninteresting as choices)? And how that plays into a process as serious as dying in, again, a hostile and uncertain world? On one hand many suicidal people feel they don't matter, yet they're supposed to take diligent care of themselves and their actions in the process of dying?

That is just a superficial picture, it gets much worse and more complicated than that. That is hard. People don't talk enough about this part of the problem, and since we don't, there's just not enough of a connection to the preparedness or the seriousness that one needs for something like suicide. It's like managing a nuclear reactor. It's very serious, but imagine if the people who were actually managing the most tense nuclear reactor situations in reality were highly traumatized, deeply suffering and exhausted individuals. Imagine if there was almost no pointing out of this as a problem. Would that not be a major issue?

And that's exactly why I shared my story and wished that the negative aspects about SN were more clearly and directly communicated. As it's really great that this place exists to give exactly such people as you described more insights on the available CTB methods and the risks involved with it and prevent them to do something uninformed, stupid, impulsive, whatever. On the other site, sad, that such a hidden and demonized place has to exist in the first place, and we couldn't talk more open about this topic as for some people choosing not to live would be really the better option.

 

[restless.dreams]

Thank you for being so open and honest about your experience. SN is still my method of choice, but it's good to be aware of the potential pitfalls. Hoping your symptoms improve and everything goes well for you <3

 

[Relic]

Yeah, because of a big mistake my doctor made. He wrote me two emergency hospital referral letters (idk what this is in English called) and both were for a psychiatry. Only in one was written 'with connection to the kidney department'. If he directly gave me one for a physical department, I would have right away been sent there and physically checked up if everything is okay. Instead, I was sitting for over a week in a stupid psych ward worrying what's going on with me.

Well, my doctor agreed with my assumptions that my kidney's got very likely some damage from it. I haven't yet gotten the hospital letter with all the diagnosis, but I doubt there will be anything physical written in there, as I was only in psychiatric stations.

Had you died, it would have been on them. Especially if you pointed out the error, and they still ignored it. And the involuntary commitment, how is this still a thing. Especially after the fact, and after you yourself sought help. They ditched that strategy in my neck of the woods, people only get locked up when about to set up the rope.

For the SN you'll get any of the T50.6 codes, renal failure is usually some N code, maybe between N17 and N19, and then there are the mental codes, R, T, and Z.

 

[johann_liebert]

Had you died, it would have been on them. Especially if you pointed out the error, and they still ignored it. And the involuntary commitment, how is this still a thing. Especially after the fact, and after you yourself sought help. They ditched that strategy in my neck of the woods, people only get locked up when about to set up the rope.

For the SN you'll get any of the T50.6 codes, renal failure is usually some N code, maybe between N17 and N19, and then there are the mental codes, R, T, and Z.

I highly doubt I would have died at any point when I already was in the hospital. Besides the itching skin and shivering, most of the physical symptoms were already gone. But you're not wrong, this one week of uncertainty and worries was really not necessary. The feeling of not being taken seriously definitely accompanied me the whole stay in that hospital. But I mean, it's no surprise as suicidality + being alive is not a good mixture to be taken serious in this society.

And thanks for telling me the codes. The hospital letter should arrive soon, when I got it I'll keep you updated with what codes I got. It'll be definitely interesting to see what they write in there about a patient who tried to CBT with sodium nitrite, idk if anyone has shared something like that here.

 

[Timothy7dff]

T The exact half-life is 82.3 days. That means until around this time the amount of sodium nitrite is halved. I even scratched the SN from the back just to make sure. Yes, it was closed and stored in a dark, cool spot in my wardrobe. Of course, it is my fault, but I'm just saying this is something that could happen if something doesn't go as planned. And when you CTB there can always go something wrong or unexpected happen.

What does this mean? After 3 months, the SN is unfit for CTB?

 

[johann_liebert]

What does this mean? After 3 months, the SN is unfit for CTB?

Yeah, that's basically what it means. This is my source for the claim.

Yeah, that's basically what it means. This is my source for the claim.

But this applies only after you opened it! When it's sealed, it's good for whatever date the manufacturer has written on there.