🤍goodbye🤍

[FadingFast2023]

Is it the same as alprazolam?

Yes, they are chemically very similar and have near identical onset and duration times.

https://tripsit.me/factsheets/Alprazolam

https://tripsit.me/factsheets/bromazolam

 

[hi-okbye]

I mean, you obviously can do whatever but you can't control what happens when you lose consciousness. Just be aware there is a high chance of failure and with that may come consequences. I thought my OD was going to be successful since what I took was lethal, and I vomited a TON when I was unconscious.

that's intresting thank you, I'll keep that in my mind. it's just this is the best shot I've got so far so I guess it's the one I'll take. wouldn't you be less likely to vomit SN when your unconscious compared to other medications because you've already absorbed it? obviously not all of it but still. I know there's a chance but I'm honestly willing to risk it.

 

[Deleted member 65988]

wouldn't you be less likely to vomit SN when your unconscious compared to other medications because you've already absorbed it?

Well, that would be the case if you've absorbed enough but there have been people who've vomited a lot and not ctb but still went unconscious only to wake up hours later, it comes down to how much you manage to keep down for the first few mins after ingestion the 1st time. It's been a point of contention and opinion on this forum for a while, whether vomiting will primarily lead to failure but I think it's more so not following the protocol but having the right meds can play a part in that. @GoodPersonEffed made a good thread about vomiting in relation to failure from SN.

PROOF! - VOMITING HAS *NOT* BEEN REPORTED ON THE FORUM AS A CAUSE OF SN FAILURE

I have been through every account of failed SN attempts. Vomiting has never been reported as a cause of SN failure. There are only two accounts that could conceivably have been due to vomiting: @Silasruin on 4/25/20, took 75% of 60g SN in 150 ml water, reported rapid onset vomiting and also...

sanctioned-suicide.net

Although @nozomu is right here, you just don't know how you'll react to sn and having AEs might help however its understandable if you can't get them due to the difficulty of obtaining a script like @lopsidedcrawdad1 said earlier on this thread. After all, I wish you all the best since you seem be set on your decision.

 

[Blurry_Buildings]

I'll be sad to see you go.

Wishing you the best

 

[LoiteringClouds]

per some requests and also because why not:


final drawing I did today:
View attachment 125810
don't know if I regret the black outline or not. it'll be taped into my sketchbook.

playlist of favorite songs (still in progress of shortening it and will be until I'm gone):

it's only a sample of 100 songs because it's all Spotify will allow, if you click on the title it'll show the whole thing though

Hello Lra,
I'm a stranger but I think we'll miss you -
Your contribution and peaceful aura,
Show your compassion has been always true.

Your drawing shows now you have clarity,
And your post does you're in serenity -
I hope, you have might and will win this fight -
I believe in you, it will be alright.

To final rest, may you proceed -
Lra, Godspeed

I think I'll remember your great drawing whenever I see the picture of human heart.

 

[Alatus_Nemeseos]

Incase you change your mind will you let us know in the thread? I may be asleep when it happens, i hope you have a lovely time playing games with your family

 

[textmewhenyourehome]

Hey Lra

You don't know me, but I've been a lurker on this site since right around the time you posted your last goodbye thread. From the moment I visited this website for the first time and read your goodbye thread, you always struck me as such a beautiful person. You have shown so much kindness in the threads that I've seen you in and ironically you have shown me so much beauty to life (your paintings from your last attempt, your list of things you love about life, etc.)

I really wanted to make an account and reply to you before I'd lose the chance to. I just wanted you to know that you have not failed as an adult. I know that I don't even know who you are, but I've seen the love exchanged between threads you've been in here, and success at life really boils down to love. And you are amazing at cultivating love, even when you write anonymously. Our world puts so much pressure on financial independence, and I've personally made it a mission in life to take as much of that stigma away as I can and offer people the unconditional acceptance that they deserve because I believe it is such an evil and pointless reason to make people feel worthless.

When I was 18, for 3 agonising years an old partner of mine battled with what we thought was terminal illness, and it crushed me into tiny bits and nearly wiped me out. It was an insane miracle that he survived. I can't imagine what losing your partner forever does to a person. I understand and completely respect your decision. I just wanted to let you know you will be missed dearly, you are the type of people we need more of in this world. Regardless of what happens, I hope you remember that you are cherished and I'll be thinking of you from a different side of the globe. I truly wish the best for you, no matter what it is.

 

[new2blue]

I am new here but I can see you have made quite an impact on people. You seem so kind and loving from your posts and I regret we did not get to become friends. But I am also happy you are taking your chance at peace. That art was awesome and will probably continue to pop up in my mind for a long time.

You are now seeking a great perhaps, one that we will all seek eventually. Per ardua ad astra. May you find the peace you seek. :)

 

[Lacerta viridis]

I sincerely hope you find serenity.

 

[absolutelyyou]

You've been on my mind, we are here with and for you no matter what you may decide to do.

 

[ropearoundatree]

I'll miss you @hi-okbye . . . You were very nice to me, when you didn't even have to be! Peace :)

 

[Cyndaquil]

I wish you can find peace, whatever you decide will be fine :)

 

[Gonnerr]

I'm cleaning my room listening to my playlist fixing it up a bit. after that I'll try to take a shower and play a game with my family.

I never discouraged somebody to do it since i join this forum but like nozomu said it might not be the right time. If you are with family , they might hear you when you throw up or something.

I would advise for you to wait until you are alone.

When i do SN , i will go deep in the woods and do it in my tent. Even though i live alone in my apartment, i might reach out to neighbors if SI kick in.

SS – Non-Fatal Sodium Nitrite (SN / NaNO2) Attempts: Member Methods & Experiences

docs.google.com

Almost all failed attempt where because they were not alone.

 

[new2blue]

You've been on my mind, we are here with and for you no matter what you may decide to do.

View attachment 125821

So sweet of you to do this. Perhaps this should become a standard for all of us when someone attempts to leave. This community is the only thing some people here have. Bless you.

 

[hi-okbye]

i think this will be my last post today.

every single one of you are so sweet, i started to cry reading your messages. i can't put into words how much you all mean to me. im shaking while typing this because i can't believe how much care and love you all have in your hearts.

even to the people who are worried about it failing, i want to try and reassure you. this is the best chance i have so far and i want to take it. when I tell you right now is the best time situationally I will get to successfully ctbing, i mean it.

i don't think I ever told the story of my signature here. it's a poem i made, 3am in the hospital when i couldn't sleep. it's about me and my partner, and my hopes for when i ctb.
just thought i should say it before i go.

this afternoon was nice. i played games with my family, i ended up having some soup and a slice of light cake.
im going to take a shower now to freshen up, spend some more time with my family, take some more songs off my playlist until it's only my true top favorites. then ill say goodnight to everyone for the last time.



i will carry you all in my heart during my journey out.

much love.
as always.

goodbye

 

[Deleted member 65988]

Much peace to you @hi-okbye, you are determined by everything you've said above despite concerns but I understand, this is the best time from a situational standpoint. You'll be missed a lot, I wish you all the best.

 

[absolutelyyou]

I wondered about your signature. It made me cry when I read it the first time I saw it when I saw you talk of your partner and I wondered if you wrote it. You are a beautiful creative soul and I wish for you to have peace. You will be carried in my heart and if you dont ever post again- goodbye and thank you for being the person you are, Lra.

 

[textmewhenyourehome]

i think this will be my last post today.

every single one of you are so sweet, i started to cry reading your messages. i can't put into words how much you all mean to me. im shaking while typing this because i can't believe how much care and love you all have in your hearts.

even to the people who are worried about it failing, i want to try and reassure you. this is the best chance i have so far and i want to take it. when I tell you right now is the best time situationally I will get to successfully ctbing, i mean it.

i don't think I ever told the story of my signature here. it's a poem i made, 3am in the hospital when i couldn't sleep. it's about me and my partner, and my hopes for when i ctb.
just thought i should say it before i go.

this afternoon was nice. i played games with my family, i ended up having some soup and a slice of light cake.
im going to take a shower now to freshen up, spend some more time with my family, take some more songs off my playlist until it's only my true top favorites. then ill say goodnight to everyone for the last time.



i will carry you all in my heart during my journey out.

much love.
as always.

goodbye

You won't be forgotten, my heart aches reading this. I hope to learn from your kindness and try to spread that same energy to the people around me. If you ever need to talk, please don't hesitate to reach out I hope the rest of your night is enjoyable

 

[-w-]

i think this will be my last post today.

every single one of you are so sweet, i started to cry reading your messages. i can't put into words how much you all mean to me. im shaking while typing this because i can't believe how much care and love you all have in your hearts.

even to the people who are worried about it failing, i want to try and reassure you. this is the best chance i have so far and i want to take it. when I tell you right now is the best time situationally I will get to successfully ctbing, i mean it.

i don't think I ever told the story of my signature here. it's a poem i made, 3am in the hospital when i couldn't sleep. it's about me and my partner, and my hopes for when i ctb.
just thought i should say it before i go.

this afternoon was nice. i played games with my family, i ended up having some soup and a slice of light cake.
im going to take a shower now to freshen up, spend some more time with my family, take some more songs off my playlist until it's only my true top favorites. then ill say goodnight to everyone for the last time.



i will carry you all in my heart during my journey out.

much love.
as always.

goodbye

Hope you have a good and peaceful ctb make sure to tell your family and friends you love them. Have a good one and thanks for being here. <3

 

[breezeboy]

I wish we could know if it succeeded or not.. Farewell <3

 

[Cyndaquil]

I'm so sorry that you have come to this situation.
Even though I didn't know you, you seem to be a very beautiful person, I wish you all the best :)

 

[Gonnerr]

No problem, good luck , hope you are succesful.

 

[Old Friend]

Safe travels. May flights of angels sing thee to thy rest.

 

[Return2themoonlight]

Im new to the site and I dont know your story but I truly hope you find the peace you wish for whether that be here or in another reality past death

 

[Kta1994]

Goodbye!
I hope things are better than here
Ill be going soon too

 

[tsykoais]

ugh ig can still read this goodbye, best of luck with your plans.

 

[not-2-b-the-answer]

May you find the peace you couldn't find here.

 

[Pᴜrple]

I don't know you but goodluck and I hope everything goes smoothly. May you rest in peace.

 

[Alatus_Nemeseos]

i think this will be my last post today.

every single one of you are so sweet, i started to cry reading your messages. i can't put into words how much you all mean to me. im shaking while typing this because i can't believe how much care and love you all have in your hearts.

even to the people who are worried about it failing, i want to try and reassure you. this is the best chance i have so far and i want to take it. when I tell you right now is the best time situationally I will get to successfully ctbing, i mean it.

i don't think I ever told the story of my signature here. it's a poem i made, 3am in the hospital when i couldn't sleep. it's about me and my partner, and my hopes for when i ctb.
just thought i should say it before i go.

this afternoon was nice. i played games with my family, i ended up having some soup and a slice of light cake.
im going to take a shower now to freshen up, spend some more time with my family, take some more songs off my playlist until it's only my true top favorites. then ill say goodnight to everyone for the last time.



i will carry you all in my heart during my journey out.

much love.
as always.

goodbye

i sent you a dm on the offchance you come back before you go, you'll be in my thoughts as i sleep tonight <3

 

[Redacted24]

I'm gutted that I didn't post earlier today when I saw this. I... just couldn't process it at the time, words left me. I'm sorry.
You might never see this, but it's been great virtually knowing you. The community is a little poorer with your absence. Wishing you the smoothest of passages to your desired destination.