Goodbye thread

[Mirrors]

I lit your candle this morning. Be at peace.

 

[NegevChina]

So sorry life brought you to this point.
Wishing you peace and painless journey

 

[Abyss Dweller]

..
Best I can do is quote myself from another thread..
"I wish I could cut into myself or hurt myself to take away the pain some of you are feeling. You don't deserve it. I'd do it in a heartbeat."

 

[bg733]

aconteceu?

 

[fadedghost]

I'm so sorry things have been so terrible.

I am not trying to change your mind. Scientists just regrew teeth in a laboratory. AI is making scientific progress become exponential. And so if you are doing this now because of your injuries, please know they may be curable with progress.

But since you were suicidal prior to your injuries, I am guessing that doesn't matter too much to you.

I just want to say how much I appreciate your honesty and your posts about what happened in your first attempt. You probably saved a number of people, maybe quite a few, who did not go the route that you did because of your honesty. You seem like a kind good person and I'm so sorry things have been so hard. I wish somehow we could have been friends... instead of you just being someone whose posts I've read and whose honesty I admired.

Thinking of you however this goes. You have been very well-liked and respected on here.

 

[TooMuchHasHappened]

This is so sad, i missed her, damn . I posted earlier in the thread and she replied to me, so i'll take comfort in that.

I'm in a similar situation, though not as bad as hers from what I understand, so I understand why she took this path. I'll be taking the same path myself soon, the path of ceasing to breathe.

I'm here for the same reason as her - and probably most people here - because living a life like this is not worth living - same as it obviously was for her - and there's no solution.

I won't be too far behind her, may she rest in peace, her pain and suffering are now over.

Good night Fightclub17, and God bless

 

[MephiticShadow]

I'm so sorry fightclub. May you find the peace you were looking for

 

[yourlocalprotist]

Safe travels.

 

[The Disqualified]

Rest in peace

 

[awaitinglove]

 

[thehorizons]

This is so sad, i missed her, damn . I posted earlier in the thread and she replied to me, so i'll take comfort in that.

I'm in a similar situation, though not as bad as hers from what I understand, so I understand why she took this path. I'll be taking the same path myself soon, the path of ceasing to breathe.

I'm here for the same reason as her - and probably most people here - because living a life like this is not worth living - same as it obviously was for her - and there's no solution.

I won't be too far behind her, may she rest in peace, her pain and suffering are now over.

Good night Fightclub17, and God bless

Same. Like you and her, I don't fantasize or glorify death. I have oral cancer and post-acute withdrawal syndrome. My life was actually starting to look up last year. Like for the first time in my life I felt a sense of purpose before I suffered post-acute withdrawal syndrome and I was diagnosed with oral cancer. I'd like to go the sodium-nitrite route, but I can't take the complementary medications for it like benzos or an anti-emetic, as they'll wreak havoc on my nervous system. I'd have to resort to using an inert gas or using night-night. From personal experience and from getting second-hand accounts from others that can't be explained by science, I truly believe there is a soul after death. I don't know if it's peace, but it would be another form of existence that's not the current one I'm in.

 

[amohan2876]

rest in peace

 

[RedFruit]

I hope you found the peace you were looking for and are finally out of pain. I'm grateful for our interactions sleep well now

 

[purebliss]

Rest in Peace <3

I have seen a few of your threads and they were all so good.

I really hope you found your final peace now

 

[TooMuchHasHappened]

Same. Like you and her, I don't fantasize or glorify death. I have oral cancer and post-acute withdrawal syndrome. My life was actually starting to look up last year. Like for the first time in my life I felt a sense of purpose before I suffered post-acute withdrawal syndrome and I was diagnosed with oral cancer. I'd like to go the sodium-nitrite route, but I can't take the complementary medications for it like benzos or an anti-emetic, as they'll wreak havoc on my nervous system. I'd have to resort to using an inert gas or using night-night. From personal experience and from getting second-hand accounts from others that can't be explained by science, I truly believe there is a soul after death. I don't know if it's peace, but it would be another form of existence that's not the current one I'm in.

So sorry to hear about your struggles, and what has brought you here. I just wanted to let you know that I did actually write you a proper reply, and posted it, but then deleted it immediately (out of respect) when I reminded myself that this was Goodbye Thread. I didn't think it was appropriate to open a dialogue with you here, but also didn't want to ignore you. I was stuck between a rock and a hard place, so please excuse me.

 

[nocturnal123]

I hope you found your peace

 

[abinchains]

I'm so sorry I didn't make it in time to say goodbye. Your interactions here were always so, so kind. And your story will has stopped many from jumping, which is what you've always wanted.

I'm glad you found this community to hold your hand throughout your last days. No more pain for you, beautiful soul. Rest easy.

 

[wine is fine but]

this hurts so fucking much
i know why it hurts so much, but i have no fucking idea why it hurts so much
fightclub was only in our lives for 5 weeks
we had engaged with each other in a few threads and had a span of just 6 days of pms to each other
we had no idea if the other was a bot, a cop or genuine, so why does it feel like this????
my heart is hurting both metaphorically and literally - this is how a normal person feels, but most on here are not normal, including myself
when she told me that she had a ctb buddy, it was like a dagger to my heart. i could not read the thread she made about it, nor her goodbye thread. i was trying to protect my heart, but a fat load of good that did
it probably seemed to her that i wanted her to live regardless, but i didn't want her to have to feel the pain from her injuries. it was that she didn't want to die. sadly the only way to not feel pain was to do something she did not want to do. as i told her in a thread and in a pm, that if she could somehow endure the pain for 2 more years, and could then live a fairly normal life, once there, a person like her would probably be glad they did it. most of us on here, myself included would not feel it was worth it in the end. fightclub was different than the rest of us on here, but she still needed to be here which is the saddest part
not long ago she posted that she was going to try and live, but then 2 wednesdays ago, it all came crashing down. i looked on my phone at work and saw she was on line. surprised because it was very early morning for her, i looked at what thread she was looking at, and it was "goodbye thread". i clicked on it to see who's it was and . . . .
from then, possibly like with many others, it has just been horrible. a goodbye thread is absolute torture, but i guess getting a thread from the grave might have felt even worse. it was hard to know what to wish for. i couldn't wish her or anyone to be dead, but i didn't want her to feel pain forever too. there was no right answer, just pain and sadness for someone

i am not totally convinced she drank her magic sleep potion. there seems to be too many things that do not make sense, but of course. a rational person could very easily make sense of the things i am talking about, because they are not trying to protect their heart. i do not want any confirmation unless it is that she is okay. personally, i feel that a goodbye thread, for the most part is for one of three reasons. the first one is a cry for help. the second is for attention, but the third is most probably the main one. to back the person making it into a corner, so they feel they have to go ahead with it. (it will not be) but perhaps that is why she always started her threads in the suicide area, not the private one. that way if she decided to leave, she could still look at her threads. i know i am dribbling, but hope is all i have at present

her story was so sad. she was an inspiration. she was hardly here at all, yet she touched so many hearts. i just hope you got exactly what you wanted fightclub. maybe you are in a realm from just over 12 months ago, and this time are not screwed over by incompetent medical scum. while it seems 100% certain that you will never get to read this post, i just hope you have absolutely no regrets about the decision you made on april 9th. rest in heavenly peace fightclub 17

 

[violetforever]

i am so late but i will always remember you wherever you are your story and your threads had a great impact on me. so many of us on here appreciated you but at the same time i realize thats just not enough to continue living. you deserve eternal peace.

 

[wine is fine but]

But since you were suicidal prior to your injuries, I am guessing that doesn't matter too much to you

if what she said was true, and there is no reason to not believe her . . .
technically that is true, but effectively it is 100% false
up until around 1-1.5 years ago, she loved life. she had no suicidal thoughts at all. then she had insomnia. i believe the medication she was given included antipsychotics and antidepressants. these then gave her akathisia and then her first ever suicidal thoughts followed
she told the medical scum that she was having suicidal thoughts for the first time ever, yet they did nothing. instead of putting her in a psyche ward or a normal hospital to monitor her until she was better, they just sent her home. then she found an 8 story building and on the spur of the moment, and, sadly the rest is history

she went from being happily married, relatively healthy, happy, a loving family to a destroyed life in such a short period of time due to medical negligence. that makes her story so much more tragic than most on here. if or when, for instance, i dispose of myself, it will not matter. everyone here, will rightfully say, he got what he wanted. but fightclub didn't get what she wanted. she wanted to live, but she could not without dealing with so much unfair pain

i truly wish she was lying to us, and was a cop or just a troll. that way, at least no one would have actually gone what she went through

 

[Macedonian1987]

I will go today and light a candle for her. Hoping that her soul is in a better place now.