Venting Do birthdays make anyone else feel like shit?

[woxihuanni]

Sb told me to kill myself on my last bd.

 

[azucaramargo]

W

They just signify a number and mean zip to me. Others celebrate them, me, its just another day in the life of.

What do you mean by "mean zip"? I like the sound of that.

Sb told me to kill myself on my last bd.

Disgusting and horrific.

 

[EmptySteph62]

My first attempt was actually two days before my 16th birthday and since then I've always felt the same. It's like the beginning of another whole year of things only getting worse and worse and more painful. I hate my birthday, to me it symbolizes the beginning of more suffering when all I want to do is just end it.

 

[Frank]

Although I do not hate them they always feel anticlimactic and I would probably feel happier without

 

[Futility]

It's my birthday in about a week, every day I move closer, each day I feel a deeper sense of dread and intense stress.
My birthday as well as new year's eve and yuletide, are the three major events that I am the most drawn to regarding when to kick the bucket.

A lot has to do with the endless abuse as well as disappointment all the way through childhood and adult life, all the memories come crashing in uninvited and merciless, leaving me a complete wreck before, during and after my birthdays.

I prefer when people don't try to give me anything or set anything up and instead give me something on another day because they want to, I hate this forced gift giving nonsense, I absolutely hate that people don't understand why I don't want company on my birthday, it's like they make it about themselves instead when I say I'm not going to host a party.

Urgh?

 

[peacefully31425]

I feel the same way. I hate that my family insists on acknowledging my birthday even when our family is so fucked up. Why should we pretend to be happy? It makes me resent the day itself and my family so much more.

 

[Alchemist]

The last couple of years my birthday was almost like any other day. No big celebration, just a bit of extra money. I just stopped caring since no one else would.

 

[Luchs]

Birthdays make me feel like shit. It's the worst day of the year for me, I can't help but be reminded of all of my problems in an amplified, shameful way. All this day signifies is that I somehow got to x years old without making any friends, I've been depressed for x number of years, lost any potential I ever could've had and noticeably gotten worse each year. It also makes me realize how unimportant I am and how other people on this day go out with other people, get presents, or have positive memories of past birthdays. All I've done for years is wake up and sit in bed all day wanting to die and then go back to sleep. Doesn't matter if it's Christmas, my birthday, or the end of the world, I'd still be sitting around like a pathetic loser. That's all this day tells me.

I love my birthdays. They are a shining ray of light through the darkness of my life. It is one of the last links to a time where I was still happy and human.

 

[Futility]

I love my birthdays. They are a shining ray of light through the darkness of my life. It is one of the last links to a time where I was still happy and human.

I am actually very happy to see someone enjoying their birthdays, I am very happy for you and I hope it stays that way for you.