Venting CTB day tomorrow or Wednesday. With SN

[Wilt-On-High]

Hey all.
I'm going to CTB tomorrow/Wednesday
(I don't think anyone saw my last post about where its gonna take place.)

In all honesty I'm really scared.
And nervous but in the end I know this is the right path for me to take
This site doesn't work anywhere else so I won't be able to update when I actually do it so.

Some of the Factors that are influencing this:
- The constant name calling I've experienced (and it increased over the years)

- My Life going downhill
I was fairly happy until I started feeling Sad around 13-14 (or earlier I think)
my parents (especially my Mother) would encourage me to tell me what I was feeling but then would belittle me and say that in not paying any bills and I have no reason to be sad or she would tell my Father. OR she would use what I said to her against me. So I just bottled up everything

- what is happening right now.
I wouldn't say kicked out but...sent out (my Father is getting kicked out) for being such a Narc (THE ONLY THING HE HAD TO DO WAS SHUT UP AND WE WOULDNT HAVE TO FIND ANOTHER PROPERTY TO LIVE IN AND I WOULD BE IN COLLEGE TODAY BUT NOOOOO.)
And I'm getting dragged into it.


I CAN'T BE BOTHERED TO MENTION THE REST SO IF ANYONE WANTS TO FIND OUT WHY I CTB'D YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO LOOK AT MY POSTS OR SOMETHING (though...its only bits and pieces of what I went through...not the full story.)


Thank you SASU + MY ONLINE SASU friends + Everyone who comforted me when I was down.

I'll probably update tomorrow morning or something

Thank you everyone.

 

[Praestat_Mori]

I hope you find peace. Good luck!

 

[Odwin]

If you aint doing it. Dont ghost us of all people the one here would understand.

 

[FuneralCry]

I wish you the best.

 

[FadingSnowFake]

I'm sorry for your pain in this life, the world it's just too cruel. I can understand that you are really scared and wish you didn't have to feel like this, like there is no other way. Has there been anything new since your post, have you made a decision? I hope that whichever way, you will find peace and wish you only the best as you deserve. Sending love.

 

[darksouls]

hope you have been released from your suffering

 

[Alexandra_]

Rest in peace my friend, may your memory be eternal. I am so very sorry that your life turned out this way

 

[rozeske]

I'm so sorry. I hope you are at peace wherever you are.