cactusflower
here but not here
- Apr 19, 2023
- 58
When people try to help it all seems superficial and surface level. Even when talking to therapists, granted I don't divulge as much as I should in fear of being institutionalized, it all seems like a waste of time. And no one really understands how much being alive hurts. Of course,the typical platitudes of "I'm here for you," and "It will get better," now just seems like smoke and mirrors. It seems people just say this to me now just to get me to stop talking.
I've tried to be more reserved about my issues with people as I'm sure talking about my suicidality constantly is probably lying not great for their mental health either, but it's tiring knowing that no one really cares or will ever care, or even understand. Being there for someone sometimes just isn't really enough. It just reminds me that people have their own lives and don't have the time to care about mine. So why should I?
I've tried to be more reserved about my issues with people as I'm sure talking about my suicidality constantly is probably lying not great for their mental health either, but it's tiring knowing that no one really cares or will ever care, or even understand. Being there for someone sometimes just isn't really enough. It just reminds me that people have their own lives and don't have the time to care about mine. So why should I?