bluupup
cronus
- Jun 7, 2026
- 116
I am very confused lately, everyone in my life thinks I'm recovering well, but I'm hiding it. I've always been a big masker, even as a kid. I only express my true emotions on the internet because I find it a lot easier than saying it in person. I don't talk to any irls online besides my sister, and she knows I'm not fully recovered. I also think I've given up on cutting, not because I'm ready to quit, I'm just bored now i guess. it doesn't feel the same anymore. it just pisses me off. I stopped opioids, and I really don't want to go back on them because of how much a terrible person they made me. i barely get high off weed anymore because I end up feeling insane while I'm high and its scary. I do whippets sometimes and I really like em, but its rare. so tldr: I quit a bunch of harmful behaviors because I'm bored of them, I only feel suicidal at some times because of moodswings, and I don't know if I'm recovering or I'm just having a good time in life rn. help???
