Discussion Are you underweight/fit/overweight/obese ? #34

[MeltingBrain]

If Yes , how did you get there ? Does it affect your suicidality (and vice-versa) ?
If you don't know for sure you can use a BMI calculator - https://www.nhlbi.nih.gov/health/educational/lose_wt/BMI/bmicalc.htm

Thankfully , I am of a healthy weight but when I am down , I eat a lot of junk because its good on the tongue which I hope would make me feel better . Self control at lows becomes difficult because I am already so screwed what's one more greasy burger going to do .
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#34
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[NearlyIrrelevantCake]

I was slightly overweight as a kid, nothing huge--10lbs overweight when I was 10yo, from what I can remember.

But once I became crippled at 12yo, I got fatter. Can't walk far, can't run, can't lift much weight without extreme pain and dislocating my collar bones. I'm now obese at 34.

My weight has never bothered me in regards to suicidality, though.

 

[TheSource]

My parents blessed me greatly with my physical genetics, but I got nerfed on the mental issues.

 

[Dying2077]

I am a skeleton 45Kg

 

[Banshe]

Im underweight because I have two different meds with appetite loss as side effects. And also have some disordered eating stuff. Doesn't impact my suicidality usually.

 

[LetMeBeSad]

I was always a bit overweight but, in my youth I was in much better shape. I ended up having a blood clot incident which I should have died from. I had blood clots throughout both lungs and I have to be on blood thinners for the rest of my life.

I couldn't do anything I liked after that. Jujitsu, football, boxing, pretty much every activity that defined me was taken away. I couldn't do any of it. I slowly gained a whole bunch of weight, and now am at the point where my ankles and knees are pretty much destroyed.

I go through bouts where I can workout and eat well but, inevitably, it makes me remember how much I missed out on over the last 2 decades.

I'm 6'0" and I fluctuate between 380 and 420. I can't get past the 300 mark. It's like my brain won't let me. When I get close to it, I get so anxious and go through some pretty wild mood swings. Eventually I give up.

 

[Death is my goal]

I'm around 43kg

 

[Dying2077]

I'm around 43kg

Hi my friend

 

[Done_Surviving]

I'm in risk of underweight, if I lose one more kg I would officially become underweight. It's all mostly because due to Fibromyalgia I developed IBS (irritable bowel syndrome) so every week for like the past eight months or so, I would get violent diarrhea and "cleanse" my insides a bit more than it's considered healthy. Lost like 6kg that way, not fun let me tell you. And due to that I'm also in constant need of hydration. But this mixed in with the nausea and lost of appetite doesn't really encourage me to recover.

 

[Suspect_Device]

I am slightly overweight (quite thin by average American standards actually). Chronic pain I've developed in the past two years has turned me from fit to flabby, and aged my face by a solid five years.

 

[HollowDrop]

I'm slightly overweight but it's barely the reason I want to get out of here. I'd be normal weight if I actually worked out. The slight chub on my face just intensifies my Babyface and makes me look younger than I really am.

 

[Skathon]

Severely underweight.

 

[Gonnerr]

45 kg now , use to be at 50 but for a men , its too low to have a decent life. Most people see the skeleton that i am and judge me for that. I don't date anymore because the look on girls face when i show up destroyed me even if im good looking.

They want to get fucked by a men not a guy in a girls body. Im not mad at them , i would do the same.

I manage somehow to have a few beautiful girlfriend but that's still not enough to like myself.

My dna sucks , and my high IQ is the only reason i had a decent life, if i loose that somehow if its an accident or something else like brain injury , i will easily overcome SI.

 

[Forever Sleep]

I'm guessing overweight to obese. Honestly, I don't want to know right now. It just makes me feel even worse. I need to do something about it soon though. It definitely makes me feel awful.

I've always had a problem with food. I've always used it as a comfort. I don't do anything else- don't really drink much alcohol, don't smoke, don't take drugs. I hate it that food is unlike other addictions. Imagine telling an alcoholic that they had to have one drink a day. We have to eat to survive though and- so many foods can be triggers. I lost 5 stone years ago. So- I do have the will power to do it but- I've got to really want it and I just don't enough. Sometimes I wish that it wasn't such a comfort to me but then- it's probably what I enjoy about life the most.

 

[FuneralCry]

Probably underweight, I've always been very thin especially as I don't really enjoy eating, it's such a chore to me and I can never eat much, it really is such a terrible burden to be trapped in this decaying flesh prison that always needs to be fed everyday.

 

[cgrtt.brns]

technically fit according to bmi but i feel obese bc of disordered eating and body dysmorphia. definitely contributes to my need to ctb. i need to be severely underweight but i cant get to that point so i need to die instead.

 

[wanttosleep]

Obese. While not the only reason it is a big contributing factor. I used food for comfort when I was feeling sad, guilt, shame or loneliness I would eat to not even enjoy it but to forget for the brief moment of my pain. It was a self reinforcing loop I would to eat to forget, get fatter, feel bad and eat more to forget. It was my only vice. I didn't do drugs, alcohol smoke, vape or gamble.

 

[MeltingBrain]

Obese. While not the only reason it is a big contributing factor. I used food for comfort when I was feeling sad, guilt, shame or loneliness I would eat to not even enjoy it but to forget for the brief moment of my pain. It was a self reinforcing loop I would to eat to forget, get fatter, feel bad and eat more to forget. It was my only vice. I didn't do drugs, alcohol smoke, vape or gamble.

I know how you feel because I have driven on this loop before .

 

[kilowatt]

I was overweight as a kid and that led me to a horrible ED by the end of middleschool that followed me throughout the entire highschool. For reference I am the same weight I was when I was in 4th grade (a bit overweight at the time), except I'm done with puberty and I've grown around 10 inches since then. Unconsciously I grew a habit of eating less than 1200 cals a day even after I didn't really care about my weight anymore, so I never gained it back. Anorexia ruined my relationships with my family, so it was really hard to even try to recover when my mom would start calling me ''Rexy'' as a joke (my name Roxy + ''rexic'' from anorexic). However, lately I grew more and more uncaring of it, getting the ''I'm gonna miss eating my favourite food when I'm dead'' mindset. I will not elaborate further on this but I think it only affected my overall self-image, which in fact, is a small factor in my CTB reasonings, but no, I would've never thought about CTB if it was purely based on my weight.

If you don't know for sure you can use a BMI calculator - https://www.nhlbi.nih.gov/health/educational/lose_wt/BMI/bmicalc.htm

Please don't think your BMI determines how healthy or unhealthy you are. There's plenty of underweight/overweight people according to their BMI that don't have any health problems regarding their weight. BMI doesn't take into consideration your muscle mass or routine, so it will never be highly accurate. Just wanted to leave this here.

 

[cats333]

i used to be overweight as a child but i started dieting at around 8-9 which caused major issues with my body, now im average weight. my ed has gone hand in hand with my depression. they feed off eachother, i guess it really has played a part in my want to ctb

 

[Yuna is My Waifu]

Weight 66kg
Height 6'3
I'm so skinny I look like I have anorexia.
I think I have the super skinny gene that's related to autism, I cant put on weight and my arms look like toothpicks.

 

[R_N]

I went from skinny to fit/muscles then psych meds slapped belly fat over my abs because I got apetite and weird metabolism while also leaving the gym.

Still, I was always on the skinny/fit side my whole life until I took the meds. Now I weight <80kg and I am 181cm tall but I still have some fat on my belly. Better than when I was 90kg tho. When I got to that I stopped eating immediately until I got to 80kg, even sedentary as I am I lost that weight fast.

I can't call myself obesse (even at 90kg I didn't look that fat) but I am not fit as long as my abs are unseen. So I am not sure where I "fit", no pun intended.

 

[ApathyToLife]

Fit, even tho I've been eating junk food and sitting in front of my computer for no less than 12 hours a day for the last 5 years or so. Genetics do work in mysterious ways I guess. Totally normal on the outside but beyond repair on the inside

 

[hermestrimegistus]

According to bmi i'm normal but according to my eyes and the way i feel i'd say i'm overweight. Used to be obese

 

[traumer]

underweight but my weight is actually pretty normal if it wasn't for my height (50kgs - 170cm)

i don't really think about my body, i don't even think about myself so probably not the reason i want to ctb

 

[ropearoundatree]

By the bmi, i think/or believe that most NFL (professional football here in the states) line-man would be considered out of shape. When taking into consideration things such as frame-size, however it is a different story entirely & needless to say, they are some of the most strong & fit humans on the planet! I, myself, am a bit under - though not due to any kind of specific diet, or other pats on the back as it were. More due to two things, genetics (probably) & then a physical illness (most definitely), that has yielded some muscle deconditioning. And anyways, yeah, well whatever.?

 

[NoHorizon]

Underweight. I'm very active and feel I live quite a healthy lifestyle but I've always struggled with being able to gain weight. It triggers me when people say that I should be grateful for that as I'm constantly judged for my weight and people are always commenting on it in a way I feel like they would be more sensitive around if I was overweight. Nobody likes or wants a skeletal man - if I had a "dad bod" I'd be much more acceptable to society.

 

[cupcakesandmilk]

My BMI is 18.4, so I'm technically underweight.

 

[February]

According to the BMI I'm considered underweight. I've always struggled to gain any weight and maintain that added weight. I seem to lose it faster than I can gain it as it can fluctuate pretty dramatically at times.

 

[MeltingBrain]

so it was really hard to even try to recover when my mom would start calling me ''Rexy'' as a joke (my name Roxy + ''rexic'' from anorexic). However, lately I grew more and more uncaring of it, getting the ''I'm gonna miss eating my favourite food when I'm dead'' mindset. I will not elaborate further on this but I think it only affected my overall self-image, which in fact, is a small factor in my CTB reasonings, but no, I would've never thought about CTB if it was purely based on my weight.

Damn that's awful . One's insecurity must not be used against oneself especially by a parent .

''I'm gonna miss eating my favourite food when I'm dead'' mindset

Did this lead to weight gain ?

my ed has gone hand in hand with my depression. they feed off eachother,

Yeah depression can really screw up someones libido .