Discussion Are you planning to leave a suicide note ? #47

[MeltingBrain]

I am old. Those are dead now. I have siblings. But I have no contact with them. But thanks for asking.

I know it doesn't mean much from a stranger but my dm's are open, if you ever feel like wanting to talk about something.

 

[SA1994EC]

I know it doesn't mean much from a stranger but my dm's are open, if you ever feel like wanting to talk about something.

Thank you. It means a lot. I can't talk now. But I very much appreciate your offer.

 

[LukaParrot]

Think a lot about this.... answer is No.

Some "stuff" may look like i'm blaming my mother for the direction of my life but I dont blame anyone, the final decision is always "yours" right? If I was weak, it was my fault. I dont want anyone feels guilt because of my decision.

Sometimes life is a flip of a coin, and you just got a bad deal, bad luck...

 

[lastch]

I'm planning on leaving a note for my dad apologising and telling him how much I loved him. I will also write out the poem 'when tomorrow starts without me'. This poem has been comforting to me since I made the decision and I think it will be to my family after I'm gone as well. I will also leave a note requesting to be buried with a blanket my grandmother knit for me.

 

[Autumn_Stars]

My will will be my note. I'm middle aged and have acquired a lifetime of assets.

 

[gloomurai]

I want to say yes, maybe some last words of comfort.. but with my current situation the only person I want to leave a note for is the one keeping me alive.. anything goes wrong and I'm alone with nobody to give the note to. In the end, no, I wouldn't. To disappear without a trace is how I want to go, to be forgotten.

 

[CatLvr]

Yes, I will leave a message for each of my children and one for my best friend. In fact, I have started working on some calligraphy exercises to make my handwriting more attractive so every time they pull my letter out to read it (which I hope eventually becomes just a once in a while thing) when they need a reminder of just how much I love them and that I left, not because I wanted to hurt anyone, but because I could see a time coming up quickly where I was going to be a burden to them. And because I had just become tired. Tired of the pain that never leaves my body alone. I do hope they understand. It's a difficult place to be in -- wanting comfort for yourself but knowing that when you finally get that relief it's going to transfer your pain to those you love. I still waver back and forth -- it is a real mess for someone who has family who loves them.

 

[MeltingBrain]

In fact, I have started working on some calligraphy exercises to make my handwriting more attractive so every time they pull my letter out to read it

You are very thoughtful

I could see a time coming up quickly where I was going to be a burden to them

I am sorry you feel this way

It's a difficult place to be in -- wanting comfort for yourself but knowing that when you finally get that relief it's going to transfer your pain to those you love. I still waver back and forth -- it is a real mess for someone who has family who loves them.

I can relate hard , many times I wish people felt indifferent so as to not transfer the pain making it easier .

 

[ctemourge]

i do want to. i want there to be closure , especially for certain family members. some people in my life did everything they could for me but i am just not meant to be alive.

 

[moonlight gate]

no because my entire family knows about my plans. all of them. and everyone in the medical profession that have been taken care of me for 28 years. i have hidden nothing and told the truth. i am 51 years old. i am not playing games. they all know i suffer and that my reasons are valid. i talk about it daily with them. i have even explained to them in details all the methods i favor. so yeah, no letter is needed at all.

 

[Spazsticatednoodle]

I am planning to leave one for my family for closure if I ever kms.
What about you ?
Especially the "no" answers .
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#47
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It would be pointless to do that in the end the note won't matter

 

[MeltingBrain]

no because my entire family knows about my plans. all of them. and everyone in the medical profession that have been taken care of me for 28 years. i have hidden nothing and told the truth. i am 51 years old. i am not playing games. they all know i suffer and that my reasons are valid. i talk about it daily with them. i have even explained to them in details all the methods i favor. so yeah, no letter is needed at all.

If you don't mind me asking, how did they receive it , When you told them about your CTB plans ? Sometimes I feel like telling my family also.

 

[moonlight gate]

If you don't mind me asking, how did they receive it , When you told them about your CTB plans ? Sometimes I feel like telling my family also.

they are sad, but very understanding of the situation. my niece and my nephew are even my witnesses for Dignitas. they have signed all the papers with me. they all know about my military background, i told them everything. it becomes much easier talking suicide with people when they know your entire background and history. they understand the reasons.

 

[MeltingBrain]

they are sad, but very understanding of the situation. my niece and my nephew are even my witnesses for Dignitas. they have signed all the papers with me. they all know about my military background, i told them everything. it becomes much easier talking suicide with people when they know your entire background and history. they understand the reasons.

Good for you. You have a very understanding family.

 

[Malfunction]

Probably not. The why would likely be obvious.

 

[qu13t5l33p]

I don't want to live anymore. I feel that writing a note means that I'm still caring about life even after I've passed. It's like even though I'm dead, I'm still dealing with my anxiety. I just want everything to stop.

 

[WaffleWoman]

Dont really know what i would say tbh. Probably just giving my things to people who gets what and the general "its not your fault blah blah" stuff

 

[TheOneFreeDude]

I'm absolutely sure my mother is either blame herself, even though we don't live together for a number of years, so I'd probably try to let her know she's not to blame. Also leave kind messages to friends and people I love, so yeah.

 

[thot88]

I have to leave a letter for my family. That my death wasn't their fault. But the reason is the way my brain works

 

[coked_pigeon]

I go back and forth!

When I'm feeling particularly resentful, I think, what's the point - it's not as if dying confers additional value upon my words if they carried no weight while alive. But I also wonder if I 'owe' it to the people in my life to give them some sort of explanation/closure.

 

[social amoeba]

i want to. but if i cant find the right words when i plan to go then maybe not

 

[vercabow]

i'm not. i have a document that outlines every reason why i want to kill myself. the whole thing is 25000 words long lol, with a 20000 word long diary from the start of this year. i don't want to leave a novel behind. however if anyone somehow finds the document on my computer then they're free to read it.

i'll probably send 3 or so people a song that i'd like them to remember me by

 

[needthebus]

probably not

i think i mostly don't care about this world at all. i have no attachments and mostly just want to die.

my parents are ill and i may wait until they die so as not to be cruel, but i may do it anyway. it doesn't feel like they like me much anyway, although im sure they would be devastated just as a biological reaction, although perhaps they wouldn't.

i can't imagine a scenario in which i am happy in 10 years from now

 

[:)0=]

Yes. "Hello. Sorry for the garbage... I tried to minimized it..." )

 

[MeltingBrain]

Hello. Sorry for the garbage

Why do you think that about yourself bro ?

 

[:)0=]

Why do you think that about yourself bro ?

Hello. :)

No. It's not about me... (But, to be honest, I'm also trash. :) ) I mean garbage - packages from meds, maybe some empty bottles etc. Sorry, my English is far away from perfect. :)

 

[CriticalMess]

Yes, so i can let my family know i chose this path for myself and that it wasn't due to one specific thing that's happened recently (a break up).

Wether they agree with my choice or not is up to them, but it at least gives me the opportunity to explain to them why I chose this.

 

[f1lth]

yes, i plan on leaving notes for several people in my life. My parents, partner and quite a few of my friends will get their own notes. My siblings might get one but im not sure yet. Ive written them all several times but always end up re-writing them or deleting them. I imagine when the time comes writing them will be easier than they have been.

 

[thetruetato]

I will, because even though my family being upset isn't much of a deterrent for me, I feel that they at least deserve to know why. I don't want any of them to be stuck with any burning questions in the back of their mind that they won't be able to ask.

 

[SafferGuy]

I'm toying with the idea of publicly posting my letters on facebook. Will obviously need a dead man's switch to post after I'm gone.

I want all these motherfuckers in my life to see how all the parts fit together.