<3 Goodbye Thread <3

[Pancake1230]

In a few hours (maybe less), I'll be taking 600mg of ibuprofen (pain relief) and roughly 25grams of sn. Im on my was to a hotel by my house. I was supposed to die in Miami, but I got scared. I am not scared anymore. I'm going to be happy.

I'll give everyone and myself what they truly need. For me to leave this planet. I'll no longer be a parasite to everyone. I should have done this so long ago. May God forgive me, and my family too. I really am sorry! I cant explain it enough.

Thanks to all the resources and kind people on this site! I hope you all recieve much happiness and blessings.

Reasons etc:
Everyday for the past 10 years I've woken up and wished I were dead. Everyday every night I'm plagued with anxiety. Because of my autism and whatever else is wrong with me I can't even function as a normal person. Can't make friends, can't talk well, clumsy, worthless. I can't take it anymore. It was so hard all these years, but it's over now. Hahaha

Trying not to cry.

 

[divinemistress87]

I wish you peace on your journey <3

 

[Contraband]

i hope you find peace pancake, good luck <3

 

[TheLastBoyOnEarth]

Good luck. I send you a big hug.

 

[notahappygirl]

Please keep us updated if you can! Wishing good luck <3

 

[deleted442]

Good luck pancake wishing you peace.

 

[Pancake1230]

I wish you peace on your journey <3

i hope you find peace pancake, good luck <3

Good luck pancake wishing you peace.

Please keep us updated if you can! Wishing good luck <3

Good luck. I send you a big hug.

Thanks so much! I made it inside. I started crying really hard, I'll be OK though

 

[Onelegman]

Good luck! I'm glad you can finally be happy.

 

[Pancake1230]

Trying to remember how long ago I ate, I think it was 2 or 3 hours ago? I have enough for 2 drinks, if all else fail partial hangings my last resort
Maybe I'll shower to pass the time

 

[SilentSadness]

That sounds horrible to suffer for 10 years. I don't consider you a parasite to this planet. After all this planet is a parasite. You shouldn't be sorry for a painful existence, you deserve peace and joy. I hope you no longer have to suffer, good luck if you continue.

 

[Onelegman]

Trying to remember how long ago I ate, I think it was 2 or 3 hours ago? I have enough for 2 drinks, if all else fail partial hangings my last resort
Maybe I'll shower to pass the time

I would recommend that you fast for 8 hours, you don't have AE, right? or benzos? The less you have in your stomach the better.

 

[Pancake1230]

I would recommend that you fast for 8 hours, you don't have AE, right? or benzos? The less you have in your stomach the better.

I don't. It was bit difficult so I had to go without. It'll be hard to wait that long, I know I need to though. If I made myself vomit as much as I can now will the time i have to wait go down?

 

[Onelegman]

I don't. It was bit difficult so I had to go without. It'll be hard to wait that long, I know I need to though. If I made myself vomit as much as I can now will the time i have to wait go down?

If you throw in even the first meal of your life, yes, it will help empty your stomach, but you will irritate your internal mucosa, wait a little and take a shower so everything can relax a little.

 

[Pancake1230]

If you throw in even the first meal of your life, yes, it will help empty your stomach, but you will irritate your internal mucosa, wait a little and take a shower so everything can relax a little.

Ok
So many mosquitos in this room, trying to stop crying long enough to take a shower

 

[ForsakenShadow]

Wishing you luck! I'm planning on a similar method as I don't have access to AEs

 

[deleted442]

Will you be taking time to write a note? Stay with us.

 

[Kurai]

Goodbye and I wish you luck and peace

 

[Pancake1230]

Will you be taking time to write a note? Stay with us.

I meant to, but I forgot to bring a paper and pen. Maybe I can write in my notes app and change my settings so that my phone won't turn off

 

[cowboypants]

In a few hours (maybe less), I'll be taking 600mg of ibuprofen (pain relief) and roughly 25grams of sn. Im on my was to a hotel by my house. I was supposed to die in Miami, but I got scared. I am not scared anymore. I'm going to be happy.

I'll give everyone and myself what they truly need. For me to leave this planet. I'll no longer be a parasite to everyone. I should have done this so long ago. May God forgive me, and my family too. I really am sorry! I cant explain it enough.

Thanks to all the resources and kind people on this site! I hope you all recieve much happiness and blessings.

Reasons etc:
Everyday for the past 10 years I've woken up and wished I were dead. Everyday every night I'm plagued with anxiety. Because of my autism and whatever else is wrong with me I can't even function as a normal person. Can't make friends, can't talk well, clumsy, worthless. I can't take it anymore. It was so hard all these years, but it's over now. Hahaha

Trying not to cry. Please give me encouragement is possible.

Hope everything goes well for you op ;)

 

[Minsu]

I don't know you, but I wish you a peaceful journey

 

[Beyond_Repair]

good luck, I wish you peace and safe travels

 

[Pancake1230]

Got out the shower, feel a bit better. I believe I last ate at 2:30ish pm and it's 8pm right now, so the earliest I can take the sn is 10/11 pm. It feels so long. Maybe I'll finish up the last episodes of dungeon meshi.

I'll keep you guys updated, thank you everyone for the kind words. I feel like I'm not alone. I can do this. Just need to be patient for a bit longer

 

[gabmor4]

I hope you can rest and be fine. A hug your tired mind. <3

 

[opheliaoveragain]

We are with you.

 

[hajnalka]

i wish you peace and end to all your troubles.

 

[Pancake1230]

Time is going by so slowly
I keep trying to watch something funny, but when I laugh I feel sad. Yesterday I told my case manager that I wouldn't hurt myself if she let me go home. My heart hurts
1 hour and 30 minutes left

 

[Unknown21]

Goodluck, i hope you at peace soon.

 

[Traveller12724]

I shed a tear for you my friend, best of luck to you on your journey, sending you all the love you need in this moment!

 

[nightlygem]

This thread is heartbreaking. I hope we can provide you with as much comfort as possible during your journey. Remember, there is no shame in backing out.

 

[Pancake1230]

This thread is heartbreaking. I hope we can provide you with as much comfort as possible during your journey. Remember, there is no shame in backing out.

Thank you. Maybe if I had been born a different person, if my very existence didn't bring me and others pain, maybe I could back out. I know I'll regret it if I do. My biggest regret is not ctb when I was a kid, when the thoughts first came. I can't go through another 10 years of this.

I just hope it's peaceful and God doesn't hate me for it