DoomsdayCTB
Student
- Apr 24, 2026
- 104
sort of. I think I want to do a docuseries of me "surging" and how no one notices or truly cares...
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Sure but not like my recordings would do any goodI'm thinking about CTB in the next months, i have tought about recording myself ingesting SN, but idk yet.
I'm not sad you are wanting to do a docuseries -- honestly that is some insane bravery. Might help normies be able to see and understand the ebb and flow of mental illness better. It just breaks my heart that no one notices or cares (this has been my experience also).sort of. I think I want to do a docuseries of me "surging" and how no one notices or truly cares...
Can you recommend me some educational videos on suicide methods? Many thanksIf we're considering any "educational" objective, there's no need for it since that type of video already exists.
I would consider the people who might be affected by the circulation of this video and the impact it could have.
I personally wouldn't record it at all. If you are asking to decide what to do yourself, then that's your decision to make in the end. But I myself wouldn't film a vulnerable moment just for it to end up on a gore site and get ridiculed by alt-right 4chan users who think slurs and bigotry are the epitome of racism. It's just not worth it. I wouldn't wanna think about that in my final moments either. I want to be completely at peace and ready to go, not wondering what weirdos online will be thinking.
In addition, there's the possibility that people may think your filming your CTB was a last attempt at attention-seeking behavior regardless of the educational intent. Many people, judgmental and close-minded as most humans are, already think SH and thoughts of ending one's life are piteous attempts at attention-seeking, so it wouldn't be your fault they think this. Do keep that in mind, though, if you deliberated this and decided you want to do film your final moments.
Sadly, the people who hurt you probably wouldn't care, or would even be glad, that you CTB'd. For you, it was a defining moment in your life; for them, it was just another day. "The tree remembers, the axe forgets" type shit.